0:00 [Music] so a florida man with drugs found around his penis around the penis yes swears that they are not his drugs who put it there wait is there is there drugs around his penis along with saliva marks you are ████ csi right now holy ████ dude so good those are the questions we should be asking you yeah they did they did not talk about saliva marks there's nothing about slaving you should have been a forensic scientist man i don't know if it was like hey what's up dad you know this ████ coke answer that's true that's the forensic scientist he's the detective on the scene he's like was it that's true because like you see a ring of crack that was really good if you see a ring of crack around the dick the
0:50 criminal came in this way that was cracked lipstick what i would like to know what i would like to know um and it doesn't say that obviously they never have good reporters who ask the right questions um they they this is a routine traffic stop why were they searching around his penis wait did it just say it's around his penises and like it's just on his crotch or like was he like on the circumference of his dick skin read this for me wrapped around a man's penis during a traffic stop wrapped around can i tell you something so one of our cop friends um he says that criminals are actually really bad at being criminals most thank goodness because they could catch them we can look at it let's go and go if i pulled this car over right now i'll be able to find something on they just give so many clues so like this i'm
1:41 so good he's like i have so much evidence in my pockets i could sprinkle it who i pull over it's like a ████ i'm ████ houdini but he's like yeah i can just tell the way this guy's tags are his lights are whatever the way he's driving i'm sure i could probably find maybe a small nine millimeter probably hidden under the seat i'm sure there's some like a brick of like weed over here like he's like just statistically so they're profiling people yes exactly interesting like they're playing poker though it's like a 77 chance 50 chance 65 percent chance like is it worth the pull over um i don't know it's like we searched uh officer researches his his entire car there's nothing and he's like was the raptor on his penis he also told us that uh he rides this detective suv that has a scanner that's constantly going off while he's driving and then it's scanning all the
2:32 plates around the road and then so like if a plate that has a warrant on the driver shows up he knows like oh you know that's someone with the warrant that's something with the warrant that's something if you can't find anything else it's gonna be around the penis or the butthole how do you plant drugs on someone's penis i mean nick you're probably the most qualified person to tell us i'm glad you asked thank you and i will tell you tell my master class no show me touch me they get a sour strip and then lace it with crack through the little hole and then they wrap it around their dick oh that'd be good yeah did they like pull this dude out the car and like give him the feelings and stuff to check you know it really doesn't say it says that the uh that sounds like that's likely like you're just touching someone you're like why does it feel like there's something here that's my sour strip and it's always based on how bad your answer is like if you say something really stupid then they're like we're gonna that's or if he steps out of the car it's like crunch
3:22 crunch crunch like why is it crunching between the legs there's nothing there sir that's some cereal officer just some cereal just put on my crotch so it's wrapped around his dick right you guys ever seen that video of the guy he's a cop and he has somebody he pulled over a guy and he's searching him and he's in his pocket and he's like what is this he's like my penis and he's like yanking on he's like oh ████ my bad sorry dude but he's pulling on his dick and he's like what is that do you think anything do you think an asian guy would get away with saying that or he'd be like oh no it's not if it's really warm that's something it's really warm yeah he's all night that's a little fatty right there it is that's a little steep green that's true he's like what is this it's my dick i'm like these were growers the authorities found cocaine and meth around his penis is it in bags quite the combo i'm guessing it's in bags or is it just like
4:13 a powdered doughnut yeah it's a sour strip they put it through the whole this looks like a beignet yeah it's a baby this ball sacks just dipped in powder ████ powdered sugar doughnut dude just like a ████ cafe dumont criminal yeah just came from the french quarter man it's all right so yeah the deputies say they stopped the vehicle driving without its lights on 4 am see sketch criminals so sketchy highly believe in that ████ like you literally don't know how to hide and they just i don't know is that why is that bad why is it bad like profiling ████ works a lot of times that's kind of what doctors do right like oh you got a fever maybe you're sick well it's just like you can predict these outcomes like don't say that profiling profiling ████ works profiling is is why is profiling bad i think profiling works because that's
5:03 what doctors do too profiling ████ works randomly all right profiling steve you don't know me you see me okay what do you think about me i mean you're a little ████ and it works i feel like you don't like police hey now take the hat off like it's all i got this guy thank you that is good mechanics profile right a ████ toyota comes in and they're like god damn it i can't make no money i'm not saying racial profiling i think general profiling yeah it's pretty ████ effective like driving around at i gotta say it's not the racial profiling because when they're look when the cops are looking for wait wait hold on when the cops are looking for a good time and they see a car full of minorities then you know they're looking they're trying to have fun right but then
5:53 when they're trying to do their job and protect the good american people then they're not racial profiling they're just trying to protect and serve and i think it's like a car thing too like if you if they give you no cars and you like cars you ████ profile the time based on someone's car i don't even know what race they are but i definitely know a lot of other ████ about them yep like what they say about guys with big ass trucks like they're just ████ lifted to the sky that's profiling make fun of like the truck nuts that's profile drug nuts are sick though but i think everyone in this world should be created equal regardless of anything sorry why don't i believe him at all because of his hat it's because we know him on and off camera you know why is because i actually believe this side more treat everybody like a criminal is that what that side does no no no treat everybody like a mental health patient and have no police
6:44 to pull them over do you know have you ever heard of the whole thing with the israel israel's airport and their the israeli uh basically like the forces that um like the security at the airport of israel they ████ get bomb threats every day but their whole thing isn't about like they make fun of the tsa's process because the tsa just treats everybody like they're like this ████ old lady could be have a bomb and they just ████ laugh at that because they're like no you got a ████ profile you're wasting a lot of time but the tsa does that so they could be equal yeah but that's the thing like my ████ six-year-old niece might have a bomb what is this gel yeah right i bet it's ████ crazy am i lighting it i'm like dude she have a bunch of jealous hate to my ████ show dude yeah dude if you profile someone's behavior that's not bad well that's like they're being sketch you know trained in this way of
7:35 detecting based on tiny nuances about people yeah because they're not doing all brown people right it's exactly because that wouldn't ████ work yeah right it's more like if someone's scratching himself over and over it's like you fit the description buddy there's like a tiny like subtlety you can read in people to see like whether they feel like they're nervous about something like little slight forehead sweat the slice shifting around looking around checking in upper corners to see security cameras like why would you need to look at the security cameras yeah little ticking sounds yeah ticking sounds in your bag trail of white dust falling out yeah just ████ like that so you guys don't look at security cameras when you go into stores or anything like that i actually do well dude you know like when you go to like a 7-eleven and they had that ████ screen that's bigger than ████ and it's like right in the front of the store almost basically saying we're watching you i immediately look at it because i'm like whoa and then look at the guy and i'm like i'm like damn dude
8:26 yo look at it start dancing oh ████ all i have to do i only look at it if i'm going to scratch my nuts or i'm just going to see someone look at me scratch my nuts i scratch like this yeah or i pick my nose i do that do you guys watch this show on youtube called gas station encounters so you were just talking about you were watching this at your home the guy that works at the gas station he works at gas station uh somewhere in like i don't know i don't know where it is wichita but yeah he basically profiles people the same way i mean like you kind of just get used to it when you do this job right a pattern yeah yeah so he sees people come in they usually always look at the teller see if they're distracted right then they go down the aisles and they always seem to think that corners are pretty good spots so like slip something in your pocket even though they have a camera like right on your ████ ass they have all the blind spots yeah it's great though it's great he catches people like shoplifting at a store and then at the end of the video he's always like please tell this person to turn themselves in for stealing a snickers bar and ████ i think if you do anything enough you just
9:16 pick up patterns like even going to the dog park if i see the person like come out and he's already on his phone i'm like oh this is the kind of guy that doesn't pick up his dog ████ yep you know he's just there just to let the dog out or you see a guy come out and the dog's already like going crazy you're like oh this is the kind of guy who has a dog that's going to fight other dogs because he's not well socialized you just see like all these little patterns that's really in depth i don't do anything like that dude you're a ████ computer you're a ████ terminator 2 robot i bet you that when you drive you you could tell when certain people are like oh this guy he doesn't drive he sold his car yeah i don't drive i don't have a car sold for crypto i guess everybody everybody does you probably see someone's crypto wallet and go oh i bet you got anything with anu in it i'm like dude you're uh you're gonna get wrecked
10:06 anything with eating i don't have any more [Music] [Applause] [Music] you
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