0:00 [Music] so have you ever asked alexa to do something and then she got you back kind of ████ up a little bit asked to do something alexa oh yeah she hit you back a little bit ████ up though oh ████ that no no she hit you back and it's a little bit ████ up you're like oh she said something to you no definitely not but i i definitely have had moments with siri and i ████ hate serious bro alexa is definitely smarter than siri i'm going to say that on the record there have been times where i got so upset that i was like i was like siri eat a dick right and she'd be like that's not nice what does alexa say does alexa clap back at people unless we'll ████ you up yeah alexa will ████ you i've only used alexa to play songs or do the timer stuff alex is smart you don't tell alexa to tell your wife to shut up
0:51 you drop it's fun can you ask alexa to buy stuff yeah yeah because it's connected to amazon so it only works with amazon stuff so you uh and amazon's also connected to whole foods so you could be like repeat my grocery order or hey subscribe to this thing or get me more toilet paper that i already ordered before i told my alexa i was like i was like hey alexa can you ask my wife how much to buy you out wow so amazon has updated its alexa voice assistant after it after it challenged a 10 year old girl to quote touch a coin to the prongs of a half plug whoa that means death has the ████ data to say that that's a very specific thing to tell a child it's an easter egg is that crazy yeah that's pretty crazy you mean put the coin inside of the
1:42 touch so touch it boom so you can conduct the electricity into your ████ damn self yeah but but what was the reason why i need word for word content so here we go ready the girl asked alexa for a challenge to do alexa replies plug in a phone charger about halfway into the wall outlet then touch a penny to the exposed prongs that's ████ real what the ████ that's crazy see i never ████ like the last what the ████ i don't like any of this ████ is that like ai starting to take over the humidity that's the modern version of like those haunted teddy bears when you pull the string and it tells you to kill it yourself oh yeah yeah but that's so specific it's like make sure you kill your neighbor named alice on 8 30 p.m tomorrow even though it's so specific it's ████ up yeah yeah that's those are like very clear directions i think it is starting to
2:32 ████ us up because did you see that alexa that little boy was like alexa it's a santa real they're like santa it's not real and the dad's like no no no all right alexa doesn't know what they're talking about okay that's fair yeah that's what you get aaron funny yeah or this is funny alexa's not lying that's a robot i can't understand those things but i feel like that's challenged how how essential is alexa in your day-to-day never i don't use that ████ so throw it out dude it's pretty convenient for me because it's connected to all my studio stuff so i just say alexa turn the studio on and every single thing this guy has a pretty cool tool yeah i do that with siri as well i do that with lights i do that with uh music i do that with a you know number of things i'm technologically dumb i just feel like the drawbacks of that of like just because you hear all the stories about them like listening yeah yeah yeah with
3:22 the them listening to your conversations and like weird ████ like that you want to listen to me a son of a ████ just don't talk back to me you know the phones don't actually listen to you right they don't no what are you talking about the ████ listen some of the cookies are our fact check done so we're good right is it the cookies obviously i know everything uh what did alexa do after no real quick four four would he listen to alexa straight up oh ████ i don't know he might because he um where were we at oh we went to mcdonald's and great here comes the tiger story no i wouldn't ask and i was ordering we were ordering food right i was ordering food through the drive-through and he was like is there a person in there you know so that's how his brain still works yeah oh cause he thinks it's a robot yeah i think there's a person behind the speaker box i'm like no the
4:12 there's a person in the building and he was like how do i talk to them and i'm like oh there's like electrical cords that go underneath does he think a person's in the phone he might oh yeah he might so i don't know like a four-year-old might kill themselves ████ dude stupid-ass tigers so is it is that like a is that like a pre-like set response they didn't amazon didn't say they just said they fixed the error as soon as they came it's ai taking over dude it sounds like some like angry technician who just wanted a ████ troll fools he's like i'm getting fired anyway have you ever heard the term garbage in garbage out yeah it's like the people who are programming it that's s█████ and then it's that's why it's so funny when people are like robots are perfect i'm like not beings are not it's like those disney movie easter egg type ████ yeah oh yeah it's like a good teenager to take off your clothes ████ yeah
5:03 the fact that i mean dude i've seen the ai dogs and ████ and like that's all great but there's no way they know hey pull the the the plug a little bit out yeah catch the penny to it give me a break already give me a challenge alexa wait until your mother goes to sleep pull out a knife from the drawer on the left side we all know it's there you know what i mean like what the into a bathtub with ████ blow dryer ████ you know yeah i encourage the parents of that child to do some sort of ████ lawsuit yeah they should suit hell yeah because every first lawsuit always wins you got hella money and also too that's like that's that's an open shot case that's that's on some jeff bezos level ████ so it's like you you gotta they were able to replicate it so they could prove that it really said that oh because give me a challenge wouldn't that change what if alexa already or i mean if amazon's already been like oh we've
5:53 rectified the problem that's already admittance to it well here's the conundrum right so there's a little another bit of the layer to this right there's a dangerous activity known as the penny challenge which began on tick oh and it started about a year ago and um ████ people wanted to zap themselves to zap themselves with electricity to be fair safer than the ████ crate challenge so alexa learned from a tick tock challenge it's the algorithm thing we don't know because amazon won't say wow but that but because that was popularized that could be how alexa picked that up we just don't know first of all human beings are idiots second of all it's still a good lawsuit there you go in america great lawsuits these challenges are so stupid i wish we could make a career off of lawsuits but i mean like some people do yeah some leeches they do yeah big time they're called lawyers only good one was the great challenge
6:43 that's it the grape the crate one crate challenge what's that one climb up wow and somebody still died the only couple people died but then like it was like darwinism types yeah you did it at a gas station like it was like the concrete yeah crazy it's a good challenge is a good excuse for a lot of these conundrums yeah you know it's a good challenge sleep eight hours a day for 30 days straight this one's boring as ████ i bet you can't do it so yeah yeah you can't do it that's way harder sleep tracker yeah and i was trying this challenge and i couldn't do a full eight what i'll just wake up at six sometimes maybe that's how you're buying these it sounds like a wheezy waiter video a wheezy waiter ain't nothing but veggies for a month i was like oh there's a lot of challenges like that like i'm gonna go on this journey where
7:35 i do no caffeine for 30 days or like whatever yeah didn't somebody also medically something happen during the cinnamon challenge oh yeah yeah they they somebody died they breathe it and then their lungs got somebody dies from the center of each other sometimes from the crate challenge obviously alex is trying to kill some kid right now with the ████ penny challenge yeah tide pod challenge tide podcast every ████ challenge just suck dick dude i like challenges dude my friend glozell did the cinnamon challenge and she had a severe overacting reaction but yeah it was a medical condition overacting over acting but that's pretty crazy though that is scary we i am i am curious don't you think amazon should kind of release like how that that came about yeah they just said that they updated alexa to prevent the assistant from recommending
8:25 subjectivity in the future do you think alexa will give us good techniques on jacking off like alexa i'm bored of jacking off can you give me a new challenge yeah use your left hand siri joe siri how do i edge okay uh oh i don't have cereal no you link to cable what happened i don't even use it all right i'll ████ with my own internet i guess you're gonna have so much porn you're gonna get some new ads tonight here we go hold on one right i have several porn sites that are my favorite what's your question though siri i'm bored of jacket off give me a new challenge to jack off you got to speak in like layman's oh like a new way to do it siri can you give me a new technique to masturbate with that's really good very well spoken actually yeah because you told me i take it to
9:16 space i do i do feel like that's way more reasonable to get some sort of response that makes sense she actually gave me masturbation matters 15 better ways to get off uh from the advocate wow it matters but there is a different there's there's a difference between them pulling up like a website that matches keywords versus it answering based off of some sort of like socially like received kind of like you know what i'm saying but especially for alexa they don't have a platform where they could send you links or anything like that right so there has to be everything they do in app i think i think and then if you're just talking to it then if you're talking to it it'll be like uh it'll say something like i don't know the answer to that like or here's a website like i found you this link it'll just like pass you over yeah yeah sometimes i wish i was more uh i had more sexual shame so then like i would um look at things and be horny faster have you guys ever
10:07 dressed up to jack off wouldn't he like put on a tuxedo [Laughter] what do you mean put on a tuxedo that's what it says dude cheese for jacking off for jacking off like what's it exactly it's like some girls joe explain yourself why a ████ turkey you know why is the first thing that comes to your head that's a girl jacking off dude number three is pay for porn this is ████ pay for porn that's why it's a ████ uh it's an ad yeah wow okay then that's the question for alexa right it's like if they are supposed to give you links to like challenges how come alexa didn't give up hey we want to help you jerk off and then the second one is dress up for it and the third one
10:58 is pay for porn jack off costume see that's just seo ████ nonsense articles yeah like when you're dressing for a nice occasion you're about you know you're respecting yourself right so they're they're saying like you should maybe like a lot of clothes number nine is a stretch nobody stretches to jerk off stretch what this is just dude this is seo stretching for yourself as much as you can before you go yeah same trick i'm gonna do yoga before i beat it tonight dude this is a writer contest who like literally has to just come up with lists yeah and like yeah that's the best new content right it's just like 10 ways to do it this writer actually tried really hard to figure out the best ways to jack off what if this actually works we ████ stretch get in the tuxedo biport ████
11:49 it's an event light some candles i might try this you're the only one who can if anthony's already beating me to the ████ he's already getting mobile special rate for that like i'm just going to come in this suit i'm not going to go anywhere everybody starts hurrying ████ everybody runs over to friar tux in order to figure this out this is a men's warehouse ad that's what it is i don't want to mess up a suit but if it's not yours you just rented it and somebody else paid for it because they're already you have insurance does it cover ████ stains it actually does oh thank you very much what's the viscosity he's like hey don't forget your stretches i'm going to like a bill clinton kind of event and wanted to make sure the ████ stains wouldn't stain there you go oh wow that's a market hold that i mean it's an evil market
12:40 like come proof politician suits right yeah yeah your ████ just rolls right off you know how they have a little maze ████ conversion like those magic wands look at that look at that come just drip right off [Music] good old good old careful boys back with the ████ conversation it's been a while we made it till night time come proof tux fabric though come on it rolls right off it's like no you have to spray yourself with the kung proof it's like protect us a nike drive it's like when you go to fryer tucks like they have to upsell you with the would you would you want some kung proof spray it's it's five dollars but you you said nothing about jack at all at all he just you know what i just noticed would you like some cum-proof spray it's like the dudes at the kiosks in the middle of the mall that want to clean your shoe even though they don't really want to clean yeah they ████ nut on your ████
13:30 coat and be like ah how you gonna get that stain off [Music] bye
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