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There's a New STD Out...

#bleached#yeastydick#uncutgems#syphilis#boatdads
the transcript auto-captions · entered into evidence

0:00 The reason they're treating it like a STD is because I guess like as a guy you could introduce a type of bacteria to a girl that just won't work with the bacterial what do you call it ecosystem that's in there? The yeasty dick, yeah. see that point right there? When's lunch? Today on a special episode of Careful Boys we're going to talk about STDs. Gross. What gross? Hello, stigma. Wow. Gross. Because there's a new one that's out. Okay, I want to know. Is it called Omicron? What? No. a big fear of mine. STDs? It's a really it's actually a new STD. Is it gonorrhea? It's gonorrhea. What is that? Um I don't know. Gonorrhea. It's called

0:50 BV. Have you heard of it? BV? So this is not a bit. It's a real STD that's like a BV? What do you think it stands for? DB. B and V? Oh, B. Wait, DV? B. B as in boy. B as in boy. The letter B. Bacteria. And then V. Bacteriosis. Bacteriosis. We got the first nailed it. What the How do you know? Isn't that a real thing? Yeah, it is. Bacterial vaginosis. Is that Is that really what it is? Yeah. No you're I know that lie face. It's bacterial vaginosis. No, it's not. I swear. No, it's not. This is what happens to us cuz we joke too much. And I know Ryan's face. This is him lying. You don't know his face. You don't know his face. read from here. Bacterial vaginosis is right there. Oh, it is. You nailed it. You don't know his face. I don't know your face. Are you a

1:40 doctor? what happens. Man, he's cuts I swear You're lying to me. You're lying to me. We would have just got murdered in mafia and you would have been so confident and sure of yourself. You would have been murdered. Murdered. Dude, I don't believe either of you. I know. We trolled ourselves into a corner. That's what we get. That's what we get. I thought I knew your face. It's cuz his reaction seems so inauthentic. It was like oh my god and it was like come on, dude. It may not be new. I think it is a thing that happens but they have now classified it as a STD because they found out some new info about it. Basically it's a imbalance in the vaginal bacteria and it's thought to be carried by one out of three British women. British. Damn. That means her and one of her friends. One out of three? Yeah, apparently. Holy ████ Um so the symptoms are it's a you get a

2:31 vaginal discharge with a fishy smell. I didn't write this, okay? This is what it says. Uh it appear I think I've been with a couple chicks like this. It appear Yeah, how is this new? It appears gray or white and it's thin and watery. It comes with the risk of infertility and if you have it you have a higher chance of catching other STDs. How's that different from like chlamydia and ████ I thought it was the same. Well, I thought you grow something and it gets you sick. They're just renaming something. It just sounds like yeast infection. That's exactly what it is. It just sounds like you're horny. Yeah, it's like a rebrand. Yeah. Okay, so if you have sex with a girl that has yeast infection, right? Do you get yeasty dick? You do get yeasty dick. I I think you also get a yeasty Cuz what's yeasty dick? STD is sexually transmitted disease so that means that you can get infected from the act The reason they're

3:21 treating it like an like a STD is because I guess like as a guy you could you could introduce a type of bacteria to a girl that just won't work with the bacterial Yeah. what do you call it ecosystem that's in there? So you could just activate the yeasty dick, yeah. see that point right there? When's lunch? Jesus Christ. I'm starving. They should call the They should call it YDS. No, a lot of guys who are like clean Yeah. and then they have intercourse with you, they can like Happens a lot with wrestlers. Okay. Yeah. A lot of jiu-jitsu guys, jockeys. which causes that situation. Yeah. They They should They shouldn't demonize the ████ so much. It's always

4:13 the venereal disease whatever. They should call it the YDS, yeasty dick syndrome. Oh, so it's the guy's thing? It's the guy's fault. Guy's fault. It's like the It's like the kings who killed their wives cuz they can't can't have sons. You know you could actually you could actually cure it in a girl by having the the antibiotic treatment on your dick. Dude, my ████ antibiotic Really? Come on, tell them, dog. Talk to them. My ████ got that. What do you do? Like you put tea tree oil on your dick? Well, so it's cured by antibiotics but half the women who are treated report that it comes back after a few months anyway. Well, they need to stop ████ the same dude. My dick's like a Saint Bernard with that little barrel with the medicine inside of it. Tell them, dude. Tell them. I think we figured it out. That is why that is why by the way. Do you know what they put in there?

5:03 What? The Saint Bernard barrel? Like tonic? going to give Saint Bernard facts in the middle of a It's alcohol. It had to be, right? In those days that that was like what they did. Cuz then they find it and then you drink it and then you cuddle the dog. That's cute. To stay warm. Stay warm. Genius. Alcohol to keep you warm. Down there is is sensitive to new bacteria. What's down there mean? Down there. Australia. Maybe it's nature's way Down under. Down under. Maybe it's nature's way to say that you're compatible or not with this person. That's probably it. If you've ever taken care of fish you realize that the ████ is very similar to an aquarium. Yeah, and it's your fault. pH levels you got to add little drops to it. One little thing can ruin it all. Yeah, right? You got to feed it certain things. I can't imagine.

5:54 Vaginas are like aquariums. They are. So it's not really It's so sensitive. It doesn't sound like this is something that really affects guys but you can carry it and give it to someone else. It seems like most STDs don't really affect you. But that sounds kind of like dull. Guys walk that ████ off. I'll do it for a little bit. Why did it take so long to discover this? I feel like it's It didn't take long. I think it's always been a thing but They didn't have a name for it. They're just reclassifying it kind of like Pluto. It's just like a thing that's always been around but now they're like oh because men can actually activate it in a woman by having sex with them they're now seeing it as an STD. Clean your dicks. Woah. Hey, clean your ████ Or get the get the right bacteria. You know what? Did you know?

6:45 But but Colleen, Ryan said we can also cure it, right? The antibiotics do. Yeah, my dick antibiotics. Who's the dog? You're a dog. Hey girl, I got the cure you need. Yeah, hell yeah, dude. You know what they're going to start coming out with? What? Probiotic dick creams. Love it. Love that. Prebiotic. Sign me up. Put me on the list. Pre? What's prebiotic? There's prebiotics and probiotics. What's pre? It feeds the probiotic. It feeds it. The probiotic needs a prebiotic to feed like to feed on. You need all of it, brother. You need all the biotics. But prebiotic is just usually like I don't know anybody lived to all this. you just ████ go on a run, huh? Huh? Get the sun and go on a run. Stay healthy, man. What the ████ is all this prebiotic? Do you guys remember there was a trend

7:35 of girls putting yogurt in their ████ Yeah, they could get like they could get like ████ you know? Yeah. No, no, no. I didn't say yeah as in like I didn't Oh, you heard of that? Yeah, as in you put the yogurt up there. I love doing that. No way. That was a Pinkberry ad. They're trying to make a comeback, yo. They're putting yogurt up their ████ because That's so stupid. That literally will cause this. Yeah. Although There's a sugar If you put yogurt up there Which flavor though? Guys more likely to go down on it. Just got to do it same day. Got to be a same day situation. Couple minutes before. You guys try banana in this? What's that thing when they tan their ████ in the sun to energize it? Gle gle Yeah. No, I thought that was their booty hole. Oh, yeah. Well, they I think it's the

8:26 same solar tanning. Solar tanning. When they're acting like a pretzel on a balcony and then getting sun direct sunlight in their ████ That probably feels nice. But I feel like it's them crunchy ass girls that that would put Greek Greek yogurt in her ████ I've never thought in my life. Are you joking or is that a real thing? Greek yogurt on vaginas? Yeah, but tanning You've thought about putting other stuff in there though. Oh, 100%. You did it on camera. Yo, this is sick. I hate being here. I love when we have a girl here. ████ you guys. ████ you. Hey, let's be honest though. So dumb. You wanted to put stuff in there before. No, no. No, never wanted to put anything in here ever ever ever. Throw that Greek yogurt out of the fridge. Can we just talk about tanning your ████ What's wrong with that? Your asshole's going to

9:17 get wrinkly in couple years after. No, it's already wrinkly. What is your You get sun damage to your ████ It's not wrinkly. Yours is just a dot. You know like boat dads? Yeah. With the ████ leathery neck. They look like turkeys. Boat dads. They got ████ gold necklaces that are like embedded in their That's true. Boat dads. Yo, your butt hole looks like a boat dad's neck. Oh man, yeah. Those necks are Yeah, you see a lot of that in Florida. Yeah, oh yeah, dude. I saw some swim coaches and they look like that. Swim coaches are are the same as boat dads. Yeah, dude. Oh yeah, those necks are crazy. Oh, great reference. So what's your up What's your best kind of ████ you think? Not the boat dad. Bleached, huh? Bleached, huh? Bleached, huh? That's the best way to answer that.

10:09 I don't know. ████ man. I don't know. Don't ████ judge me, ████ a bleached butthole before? I've seen a bleached bleached ████ before. Blood in there? Blood in there? I think it just looked blood. What did you think? Wait, what does What does a bleached ████ look like? Hey, that's a thing, right? Bleached ████ How do you know? I have a question. So, did they tell you that Do they tell you that they bleached it or they you just saw it right there? everybody in the comments would be like, "Yeah, that's a bleached asshole." Oh, the porn video you're watching. Funny in the comments. Yeah. Bleached ████ at 14:01. Oh, I got to see that this is bleached ████ right there. usually user 675. Um Bruno in his documentary go out to get his butthole bleached? Who did? Bruno. Sacha Baron Cohen. God, dude. Bruno's so freaking funny, man. Damn. Dude, the gay bit is so good. Yeah. Oh, yeah. The gays for sure doing that.

10:59 When he's at LAX? Yeah, he's like a gay man with a traditional African name. And then they're like, "What is it?" He's like, "O.J." On J. Springer. And all these people are so mad. Yeah, dude. All these black ladies are so ████ mad. I like I like Straight Dave's uh slam Was it Slamfest? Remember he throws that UFC fight? But then they just start kissing. Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. I forgot about that. And his name Straight Dave. Dude, it's so good. Good bit. Well, STDs, huh? Yeah. Yeah. I've never had one. Yeah, but what's the worst STD besides AIDS? I never Oh. Not ever. Not me. No, no, no. Which one do you not want the most? Well, I think yeah. First of all, I don't want any of them. Yeah. Top five. What's your top five? said besides AIDS, isn't syphilis one?

11:49 Yes. But that's that's that's for more uh gay boy. What the ████ Why'd you drop it? Gabe? What's her Are you Are you asking I've never seen Colleen make a face like that before. You're asking that because of where the billboards are, huh? Yeah, it's it's Oh. You're asking because there's a billboard there. The billboards a lot of more of them are in around WeHo. No, it's because it's a gay neighborhood, not because the disease is only affecting gay people. So, the billboards are going to be gay. So, you learned something today. See, that's good. Wait, do you know what the symptoms are of syphilis? I do not. I do not. I'm not I'm not educated in that. But that's the one you don't want the most, even though you don't know what it Cuz it looks crazy. I saw pictures of it. What does it look like to you? Dude, like ████ Like Like a checkerboard. Your whole body. Yeah. Wet jeans.

12:39 This. You know the wet jeans look? Yeah, that too. This too. Just you can't help it. Beethoven died of syphilis. Did he? What? Do you think he was gay? What is the cause? How did it even I know I want to know more about it. I'm educated. Hey, didn't Al Capone die of ████ syphilis? Or he had he had it he had a Really? There was a really famous story of I think it was Al Capone. It was a famous mobster, but he had like either syphilis cuz I think it makes you go mad eventually. Like there's an STD that eventually like rots your brain. I think it's syphilis. Yeah, I'm not Yeah, he did. Yeah, he did. He died of syphilis. So, he just went crazy towards the past. Can you look for Beethoven cuz I want to see if I made that up in my mind? Yeah, I want to see it, too. You know what, guys? I'm not educated in that world. So, I'm here to learn. died of gonorrhea. us are not educated in the world of STDs. Learned by doing.

13:29 Type in parenthesis close apostrophes and then do uh Just type in Beethoven syphilis. I did. It says there's little clinical or autopsy evidence that Beethoven had syphilis. Man, it was Mozart then. Damn. Says it's Japanese propaganda. Damn. I think it was Mozart. It said his death was likely caused by liver failure from alcoholic cirrhosis. Ooh. Way less sexy. It says it's what's that's what usually What do people say? Usually. It says spot her in your town by asking this question. That's what it says. Dope. Yeah, syphilis. That's a good choice cuz you can die, you can go crazy. Yeah, that's a What's the other non-curable gonorrhea? Herpes. Oh, wait. No, herpes is curable. Curable, but it's Types of herpes, right? I think the you know the one that everyone doesn't want. I think that one has like a thing you

14:20 can take now and it's like you don't have it. A A herpes is like a black pill or something like that. So, it's not curable. Like she legit It's curable. Clinical cure. It's so low of a but it's not curable. So, you have it forever. So, you have it forever. Sometimes. Undetectable. It's It's curable, I believe. But don't hella people like carry it? Like they might not show symptoms, but the other one, though. Yeah. There's like two kinds. Simplex one and simplex two. Yeah. Like shingles, they say that's herpes. How about HPV? Shingles is herpes? Yeah, it's a form of There's like different forms of You know what I found out? Foot warts is actually the same virus as the herpes. Ew. Foot warts? Yeah. Thank god I don't got no warts, bro. Yeah, cuz I got a foot wart right now and I'm handling that ████ and then I went on a deep dive.

15:10 Everybody run. Bro, me and Hannah have the same ████ wart on the same place on the same side of the foot. it from her. So, we ████ went like this one day and shook hands and STD'd our feet together. One out of three British women, man. Yeah. ████ covered in herpes. Yeah. Riddled with it. That whole ████ island is herpes central. Why do you think for this Wait. Joe, why do you think for BV it's carried by one out of three British women? Why did they say that? Cuz I didn't say that. Cuz they're loose women, I heard. Well, well, well, well I've also heard that. Well, let's be honest. Is UK cut? Is everyone cut in UK? Oh, interesting. That's true because if you're Subi, the detective. Yo, the dick-tective. If you're not cut, you can hold more bacteria. Colleen, you ran through a couple British guys. Is that true? I This is not true. No.

16:04 Not true. They were Australian. Look, look, look. It depends on your lifestyle, right? If you're athletic, if you're always out and about Ran through is wild. and then you you're out and about and then you you're in a hot scenario. It's musty up in this ████ And then a girl wants to like, "Yo, just ████ me in the bathroom." You know, that can cause that cuz that's ████ me in the after a ████ hard game of rugby. In the lube. If you're out and about type of guy, obviously that place is going to be yay. You know what I'm saying? So, True. It probably could cause a lot of it cuz there's a lot of people in UK I know for sure I'm not I don't know for sure. No, no. Yeah, just say you know for sure. In general, they're not cut. And they don't shower that much. Cuz they got to save water. By not cut, by the way, can you explain what you mean? Uncircumcised. Uncircumcised. They're not that Jewish over there. I just don't know what they look like. I've never seen one. It's like this. You never seen one?

16:54 They're not like this. An uncut one? Go on Google. It's like this. But when it's all hard, it looks the same. No, yeah. Exactly. It comes out of the pocket. But But in But But it's like this when they're chilling. It's a turtle. And then when they're hard, it's literally like that. Yeah. You don't have to say there, by the way. Huh? Aren't you one of them? Ours. Ours. Aren't you one of them? You're You're You're not cut, right? Uncut gems over here, bro. Uncut gems. Half cut gems. Half cut gems. Yeah, good. You have cut. Wait, for for The doctor cut half of it and be like, "Never mind." my dad was like, "Oh, god damn." And then he's like, "It's okay. That's how you do it? And then the doctor's like, "Are you sure? It's a little sh We can go again." So, Steve's is like this where his his turtle's peeking out just

17:45 a little bit. Wait, so half cut? Spot on. Cuz cuz the doctor were like this and then the Steve's dad's like, "Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, stop." And then it was like that. Yeah, seriously. No, seriously. My dad was there. Wait, that's a real story. Yeah, it's The doctor didn't want to go too deep, so they they cut approximately to where it was and then when Steve grew older, it just the dick got bigger. So, that's why it just got like is true. My dick did get bigger as I got older. So, so that that means I don't know how you do that. Yeah, how do you do that? It's It's just the the dick got big, so the skin got big. It's just a half cut uncut gem. He's a dick-tective. Uncut gems. You are a dick-tective, dude. For people that look like this, It's not a gem, though, if it's giving me BV. Wait, your dad That's really a real thing you're That's not a bit. Your dad Your dad hesitated. My dad was

18:35 there. The doctor did it and then he's like, "Oh, we No, we we That was too shallow a cut." And my dad's like, "F███ it. Forget it. Yeah." Cuz my dad was standing there. Yeah, yeah. That happens. Woah. So, yeah. I'm a half I'm a half. You're half You're half breed. I never heard of that. So, the top head He's a hybrid. Hybrid. Nice. His dad what? It's not sensitive. It's the bottom half. I'm under 5%. That's not what you want your dick to be referenced to. Cuz you're also uncut gems, aren't you? I'm uncut gems. Stop talking. I don't want to like visualize everybody's dick in here. Like I'm going to stop doing Think about it, Colleen. Burn it to your memory. Hey, we had to think about BV. When my wife tells people I have a big old dick, it's cuz it's mostly skin. People don't know that. Shout out. Skin. Hey, can you pass the phone to Steve? Yeah, let me get some Yeah, okay.

19:27 Yeah. But yeah, he's kind of the bridge between uncut gems Yeah. Tell us in the comments if you're uncut. Yeah. Who's club uncut gems? If you're half cut, I see you. Let us know if you are a If you're uncut, it's okay cuz it's natural. You can That's how you're born. But I thought you were going to do it to become Jewish. And you can give more BV out. Yeah. That's if you're just dirty as ████ But I thought you're going to do it because you're going to be Jewish with your family now. wash your dick well. No, I I I don't believe I need to be anything. I'm just I'm a supporter of whatever goes I'm go with the flow. How much should How much should a guy wash his dick? Every day, every second, every ████ second. Morning and night. Every every second. Well, I'm washing my penis all the time then. Every day is kind of crazy.

20:18 Every time Oh, don't you take a shower every day? Every time you pee, you got to be extra clean. to dab it? No, you got to make sure that thing go I'm not Why are we talking about No, no, no. What are you talking about? No, no, no. Come on. Hold on. It's 20 You got to make sure what? Let me see what time it is. Yeah, it's good to That's great, Eddie. Thank you. You can't just cut the video, man. I want to hear you. No pun intended.

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