0:00 Then this fool right when you say that you're in the middle of a party and he goes all of a sudden this guy morals and ████ >> He sounds like a Mexican player. >> You know what I mean? >> All of a sudden >> look that friend's a dick. But that's probably why we're friends. You know >> what's so funny. Anthony. Welcome back to another episode of the Careful Boys. >> All right, this this sterile clap. >> All right, here we go, y'all. This is a big one. All right. >> Yay. >> Let's all discuss the unspoken rules of dating your homies ex. >> No, that's I wouldn't do that. >> You don't do this, brother. >> You got You got to give >> I did that, though.
0:50 >> Wait, what do you mean you did? >> I wouldn't do that. I did that though because I said I I immediately was like, "No, that's not And then I thought about I'm like, "Oh, I did this." >> But talk about your conflict that you felt >> or there was no conflict at the time. >> Well, it wasn't it wasn't my homie's ex. It was uh like it was during um >> it was my homie's wife. >> No, it was just like it was a weird thing where like it was during tour and like there was this one girl that my my homie like brought around. You know, like when dudes do that, they bring a girl around to like rehearsal and you're like, "Why are you doing Oh, that's why. To ████ look cool and s███." He wasn't in my crew or anything, but I worked with him. And then he brought this girl. I didn't even meet her. No, I didn't even talk to her. >> So, they were they were dating or >> No, he was just like trying to ████ peacock in front of her or whatever. And then um >> but unfortunately he brought her around really nice peacocks
1:41 >> with way bigger feathers. >> I didn't I didn't I didn't have one interaction with her. And then like later that year, like months and months later, we ended up doing like a show where she actually lived, which was like Miami or or uh Tampa. And then I met her there. And then we just I I was like, "Oh, you're you're that girl that came to the thing. There were like a ton of girls coming to rehearsal at the time, so I didn't know." And then I just started talking to her more. And then I realized that like we started hitting off. We had really good sense of humor together and everything. We meshed really well. Great chemistry. And then um and then she started telling me about like homeboy and about how like he I didn't know this but like he really really liked her a lot but she wasn't into it like that. So it was like it didn't go anywhere. So then I looked at it like oh it probably isn't one of those situations where I should go to
2:31 him and be like yo dude like I'm I started talking to that girl that you brought a long time ago. At this point he's had five girls since so I didn't think it was a big deal. And then like >> but it's the one that got away though. Yeah. Then we got me and her got really close and then we started to do like a longdistance relationship and we actually like committed to it. I'm like, "Oh ████ now I'm in this ████ whole relationship with this girl." And then um and then one time I'm in I'm still working with this dude like almost every day. And then at one point we're in the bathroom and then he goes, "Hey, uh so what's up with Lindsay?" Huh? Like huh? How'd that happen? And I was like, "Oh, like is it weird?" like I wasn't sure if I should say nothing cuz I didn't know how big of a deal that was for you. And he's like, "Nah, it's cool, but you know, it would have been nice." >> Dang.
3:21 >> What though? Nice. >> Get a heads up. Like what's >> And I think I understood that at that point. It's like it's even if it's not your homies ex like if I think it hurts more if they attempted really hard and were unsuccessful. >> Oh, I see. which sounds really funny, but like I think if a dude was like trying to go after something and you got it might be even more of a reason to be like, "Yo, I don't want you know you feel weird about this, but you know this is happening now." You know, >> I would I would be paranoid like were you ████ already talking to her when I brought her around? >> No. >> And you've been working on that ████ >> No. Yeah. No, that didn't There was no crossover at all. And uh >> as awkward as that is in one sense, which no matter what the situation is going to be awkward for, you know, to like get past that conversation, I feel like that's like a reasonable way to like cope with it so you can just move
4:12 on like get it off your chest. You never have to like silently think about it. Cuz even would have been nice is not necessarily like I would assume like I do want you to tell me if you're going to do it. It's more like uh whatever weird insecure self-preservation, I'm gonna acknowledge it and be like, "Yeah, it would have been nice, but and then we can move on because I'm probably not gonna bring it up. >> Let out some steam." Huh. >> And I Yeah. And I think like looking at it in retrospect for that moment, I was like, "Oh s███." Like actually, he's the kind of guy that would probably have done the same to me. Like for me, he probably would have went out of his way and been like, "Yo, I don't want you to think it's weird, but I started talking to this girl." He is a good guy. So, I'm like, "I should have taken that as a note of like I should just do it cuz he would probably do that." M >> let alone instead of thinking isolated in my situation like he probably would cares dude got so many girls he's five girls ago was that chick so it doesn't matter but like all those assumptions don't amount to anything cuz all that matters more is the gesture it has a
5:02 high value I should have just done that yeah >> and he was just rebounding on those five girls just smashing them >> he wanted her the most >> he was living a life of abundance >> hedonism so much >> but then I ended up with the one that got away for him so that meant a lot >> yeah I see >> did he go how was she in bed we didn't we didn't talk about that stuff. >> Dude, I'm not going to kiss and tell. He's like, "Dude, it would have been nice. >> That's what I want to do." >> It's more of a thing in between me and him. And I was like, "Oh, that makes sense." >> Not his conversation style, huh? >> Damn. But I don't think that's actually as bad as like stealing a girl that was married to your friend. >> Stealing. >> That's probably the worst. >> Like actively stealing. >> Yeah. But that's the thing that was married to friend. So like let let's let's take that hypothetical into account, right? So now they like divorced Define stealing.
5:52 >> That's not stealing. >> But is that okay? >> No, that's one man's trash is another man's treasure. >> Damn, that's different. >> That's still That's still hardcore, bro. What about like you and your homie then? That man's trash. >> Hey, binders keepers, losers weepers. >> Damn, Joe's hardcore >> for real. Let's say you and Hannah got divorced and one of us got with her. That would have feel weird as >> Oh, no. You know, it's weird, especially for like gatherings. Finders keepers. >> It's It's weird, but I think the older you become, I actually think it changes. So, for example, right, I was thinking about this, like I have a family member who went through a divorce, all that stuff, and he's like late 50s, right? And then, um, he started talking to a girl and I'm like, "Wow, it's nice that you can still find love, you know?" And
6:42 then he told me, "Oh, it was his it's it's his friend's ex-wife." And I'm like, "What?" But then he was like, "Oh, but my friend passed away." I was like, "Oh." And he goes, "But we knew each other like when we were all young." What? And then it was like it was it just it was weird. But then when it laid out, I was like, "You know what? At that age, it's hard to find new people and be like >> safe and trustworthy." Yeah. >> So, it's actually kind of sweet that you guys knew each other. Like in high school, you guys stayed friends. You guys were there for each other when her husband passed away because he was his friend too. And then just conveniently, you guys kind of fell for each other. And I was like, that's a cool story. >> That's pretty whack. >> And in the back of my mind, I'm like, you've been scheming, huh, you ████
7:32 >> I think that's hella whack. >> That's even worse. >> I think I think that's the when you're even younger, that's the same excuse like like guys that steal girls is cuz they don't know other girls. >> Yeah, >> it's the same story. You're just old. I think when you're younger, we >> just both got married and have a ████ ton of kids and all of that was just a ploy. He >> He's playing the long game. >> This episode is brought to you by the RP Diet Coach app. Remember when I lost over 30 lbs and got ripped for a bodybuilding show? This is the exact app I used. You can adjust your macros your way, shift your calories from day to day between meals, and get instant guidance when your plans change. You tell it what goals you want and then it gives you the plan to follow. It's super easy to use and it's built by my buddies over at RP.
8:22 Jared from RP was my diet coach for my bodybuilding show where I won double first place so you know that it works. To get our special subscriber pricing, go to rpstrength.com/rpskinny time. That's rpstrength.com/rpskny t i m e. RP skinny time. Link in the description below. >> I think when you're younger, it feels like, oh, you have hella people to like meet and then like it could be anybody, but I feel like the older you are, it's almost like now everyone's shady as ████ and you got to be careful. >> Yeah. Who the ████ can you trust? I mean, you just you meet people at a lower rate for sure when you're older. >> When you're older. >> Yeah. Again, if you both have some version of some sort of broken in your life, whether it be divorce or like a lost spouse or something like that, it's like it might be easier to latch on to
9:13 somebody who's got that too. >> Yeah. >> Versus just the okay, you're single and available, but like you're also 50. Like, how come you was single the whole time? >> What's wrong with you? >> But what's the deal if like let's say that your ex your ex from like years ago, right? Like you're with Nina now. You don't give a ████ But your ex from years ago is now dating your friend from now. Is that weird? >> Uh, and I'm like still good friends with that friend now. >> Yeah. >> And they're coming around >> and they met their own way, not through you >> their own way. >> I think them falling for each other is not weird. The idea of somebody falling, it's like people fall for people and whatever circumstances like that's not my business or anything like that. But to maintain a healthy relationship, I'm not even like would have been nice cuz I'm already married so I don't care. But it's more so like if I'm like consistently friends, the would have been nice is more like uh like oh you
10:05 guys were dating for like 2 years like and we're still friends. You didn't tell me cuz if we're friends and we interact all the time but you're not letting me know what's going on with your love life and you felt weird about it so you kept it private until it got to a certain level. I think that's like potentially weirder on our friendship, not the action of like you dating her. It's just like what what's what's the definition of our friendship >> versus like I don't care if you do that you know but like if you know you're like hey um one thing led to another we just started dating okay cool >> but if it's like yo like I we've been talking for like a year or something like that and I just thought it would be weird to tell you then I'd be like okay like that's okay thanks for letting me know now but like you could have just told me too like >> all right does it make it any different if let's say one of your close friends who's like a player player decides to just score on your ex and just
10:55 >> if it's just a hookup >> and just a hookup and she had like hopes for it to not be that way. >> That's That's tough. That's just tough. It's also but it's also not my business. The best I could do. It's not my business to for her. Like that's my ex. Like I ain't trying to get in her business of who she >> Yeah. >> But that's an ex that you like you cared about her. You treasured her. Chances are I don't have a relationship like even like on a consistent friendly basis versus the homie. >> Okay. Yeah. >> So the homie I feel like I have equity to like talk to. >> Oh, you would say something. >> I'd be like, "Hey man, like try not to break her heart, bro. I already did that. >> Break her puss, not her heart." >> Oh, what if he goes, "Oh, now you want to act all high and mighty. You used to be the king with me." Oh my. Oh, >> you used to run this. >> Or in that scenario, >> those are real conversations that happen. I might just use like the truth and then like at the end of the day you guys are adults and it's not my business
11:46 but I might be like hey I think she really likes you so like just you know she's a good person tread soft. >> Then this fool right when you say that you're in the middle of a party and he goes all of a sudden this guy morals and ████ >> He sounds like a Mexican player. >> You know what I mean? >> Look that friend's a dick but that's probably why we're friends. You know, >> all of a sudden, >> suddenly, bro, your cousin. Hey, suddenly. >> Yeah. >> Suddenly, >> you wouldn't try to gross him out and be like, "Man, we did this. We ████ did I ████ nutted all over ████ face and s███." And he's like, "I don't want I don't want to do it now." >> See? >> Damn. I I'm going to write that one. >> Try that. Try >> try. >> I only think I only think it's weird if it's like right after and you haven't really like moved on.
12:37 >> Dude, the ████ is still fresh in her mouth. >> Oh ████ I think that's weird, right? >> Yeah. I think definitely if it's like right after and even then under the like the right perfect storm and articulation, it's like, hey, look, if it's real love, then like there's always some sort of conversation or forgiveness might be able to happen. It's not like it's not like the second I'm I'm not going to be freaking so above anybody where I'm like, "Oh, because I had sex with her or had feelings with this person, none of my friends could ever look at her a certain way." Even though I've hella moved on like that would be also really weird. >> I'll tell I'll tell you a story and then after I'll tell you who this is cuz you know both people. >> Of course I do. >> But um so my friend who I was like friends with, I wasn't romantic with her at all. Um, we was just hanging out a little more than usual at this point. And then uh we decided to go to uh
13:27 Banana Bay, just me and her. Let's go Banana Bay, ████ kick it, whatever. And then we ran into her ex who like had they just freshly broken up like not too long ago. And uh it was one of those breakups where like he's really hurt over it and she's kind of like good riddance kind of ████ Um, and then he sees us there and then like this fool like texts me afterwards and he's like, "I would have expected you to show a lot more um sensitivity towards this situation than that." >> And I'm like, "What are you ████ talking about, bro?" Like, I don't I'm not even close to that guy. Like, I just kind of know him. >> Yeah. >> And I didn't know I knew them separately before they were dating and ████ I don't I really didn't care about I had no equity in anything. And then I was like, "I don't give a ████ bro. Like, what are you talking about?" And he's just like, "Yeah, you you know that I we just broke up and you're you're taking her out." I'm like, "We're going to ████ Banana Bay. I'm not taking her
14:18 like like Ritz Carlton and s███." And I I was just talking ████ back to him like really insensitively. And he was like, "You really disappointed me, man. I thought I thought you understood situations a lot better than that." And I was like, I ████ hated that guy after that. >> But were you guys even close like that? >> No, not at all. >> But in his mind, he was >> in his mind he was in his ████ sorrowville. So he's just like everyone should cater to my like >> and you're not even going after her. So it's just his insecurity. >> I wasn't. But you know that's just one of those s████ where >> out of spite I'd start making out with her. >> I'd be like ████ you. You don't control me. >> But I think like in his mind that's where I think like the topic is interesting because some people will brand the situation as that when it completely isn't. And uh you can't do nothing to help those guys. Like if they just think that that's what's happening, that's it, bro. like there's no amount
15:08 of anything I can do to help him. Like he's just going to feel betrayed. >> Yeah. And in a best case scenario, if they're really concerned, they could always approach it and ask in a certain way just for their own like curiosity or clarity. But hey, look, honestly, it is what it is, but I just wanted to know because blah blah blah. If they wanted to maintain a relationship, even then, that's a little bit whack, but still. >> You should have made a sex tape and sent it to him. That's ████ annoying. >> Yeah, >> I hate this guy. >> That's kind of where I was like, "Oh, I get it." Like I think some dudes when it's the the feeling of like, "Oh, dating my ex." It's it's almost like a madeup feeling depending on how much you miss your ex. >> Oh, you know what I mean? >> That's true. >> It's not about someone actually doing it. It's about you feeling like it. >> It's where you're at with it. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> If I was done, she could have a trainact and I could just be like, "Wait, I said
15:58 exactly too soon." >> Exactly. Take it back. >> She could be Bonnie Blue after. And I'm like, >> "Oh my god, >> good for you. I hope it felt good." Like >> you have good detachment skills, man.
// end of tape