0:00 If you're a white chick and you say I don't date white guys, everyone's going to be like, "Let's ████ go, girl." Nobody's going to be like, "Shame on you." What the ████ shame on you? >> Welcome back to Careful Boys. Today we're talking about when does preferring not to date your own race turn into self-hatred? So, why did you hate yourself so much that you didn't want to date white people anymore? >> Uh I think that I got enough white like all around me already. >> You're white overdose? >> You got white you get whited out? >> I have two brothers and a sister. My parents are both whiteys, ultimate whiteys. And yeah, I just think that uh I just like them a little dark, brother. And I And I like a big ████ ass. >> Now that Let me ask you this question because I want to know the exact inverse. So, there's a lot of like Asian women that go, "Oh man, like I've been
0:50 like I'm so around Asians my entire life like socially, family, everything that when they try to date someone that's the same ethnicity as them, it feels paternal or like brotherly." Do you have that feeling with like whites? Like where it's like it just feels like, "Oh, this again?" >> Nah, no. >> No, not at all? >> No, because if you're you're attracted to somebody and you're you're romantically interested in them, that's that's what I That's like number one, too, for me. And then number 17 is like, "Where are you from?" and ████ like that. I don't give a ████ >> But you just have like a taste. >> Yeah. Yeah, I think so. >> I heard that from a white girl. Cuz she was like she liked dating Asian guys. And I was like, "Why Why?" She goes, "Oh, I don't know. It's kind of like dating a brother." When she when she dated white guys or something. >> like a lot every race kind of clicks that >> I've heard that before. It wasn't just Asian girls I heard it from is what I'm
1:40 saying, but When did you When did you develop your fetish? >> Yeah, I was I was 3 years old. And I was watching uh uh a movie I was watching a play called Teahouse of the August Moon. >> What the heck? >> Yeah, and I was like, "Oh, wow. Women uh these Asian women are getting it going for me." >> Oh, it was I I thought you said Latino was your first. And then or like that's what you wanted. >> That's what I wanted and then >> You you got Asian instead. >> Yeah. >> Because you couldn't tell the difference. >> I think everybody wants Latina at some point. >> 100%. That was my first girlfriend was a Latina chick. >> Yeah. Oh, cool. Yeah. >> My first crush was on big time whitey though. So like I've just been all over the place. >> Me, too. >> But I don't what I don't understand is that when when these guys see or women when they see like a white guy Asian female pair and they go Oh god. You know like they throw their hands up. But it's like >> Right now it's the Oxford study thing. Like they just get so roasted. I feel so
2:32 bad for them. >> But how come they don't like call the white dude self-hating, too? How come it's always only the women? >> Well, they call the white guy like >> colonizer? >> No, like what you call it like weird and fetishizer. So like >> Because sometimes they are. You know, like Yeah, like these guys but then those are like so specific. It's like these guys that that do the ████ 90-day fiance ████ or they like mail order a Filipino lady. Like that's very specific. >> Yeah. But like if you're just dating or you you know >> Like Asian chicks were like sushi. Like everyone loves them. But then some of the white guys that love them are weird and some of them are normal. >> Yeah. >> Just that's true. There are some sushi loving white dudes that are like super into it. >> Yeah, it's like I feel like Asian chicks are like sushi. Everyone loves them. Like black dudes love Asian chicks, Asian dudes love Asian chicks, Latin
3:22 dudes love Everyone loves Asian chicks. >> And there's a lot of them to go around. >> Yeah, and then some of them are just really weird dudes in general whether regardless of what they even like. >> But I think what people are noticing is that there's a discrepancy where like for some reason earth-wise there's a chance for the weirdest ugliest white guy to still get a decent looking Asian girl. >> What's up, boys? >> You know You know those things? >> You know it's it's happening in Japan right now, too and they're calling these girls Pocahontas. Like that's the that's what they call them. Cuz you know how Pocahontas got with uh John Smith? >> But I heard she wanted him for his dick size mostly. >> Not because of yeah. But there's a there's a there's a weird segment in like Instagram where like you would just fall into this rabbit hole of this kind of group, and then you just start seeing it
4:12 over and over cuz the algorithm catches. >> Right. >> So on um on our like in American end, it's the Oxford study like they just keep saying Oxford study ████ right? >> Yeah. What exactly is Oxford study again? >> So they did a study on dating apps where it showed like the likelihood of people swiping. It's been debunked now, but like because of this small sample study, basically they said that uh Asian girls are more likely to respond to white guys versus black or anybody else. Um but then not at the same rate as Asian guys. And then so like Asian and black In this study, Asian men and black women were the least responded to, and then white men were the highest responded to. >> And it was just a joke on TikTok that like went viral and people thought it was real.
5:02 But it wasn't even real. There was no information, there was no actual study. It was just a bit. >> Wow, they just made it all up? >> Oh, it was actually a joke? I thought they only had like a small sample size, so it was like ████ >> There's actually no University of Oxford study investigating or validating preferences for interracial dating. >> So whenever they see a white guy Asian girl relationship, they just go Oxford study, Oxford study. >> Yeah. That's weird. But then I I just don't think like where did the self-hate part come from though? >> Well, because there were there were videos of uh girls in like Asian girls in the 2000s like on talk shows like Tyra Banks and all that, and then they would put down Asian guys and say that they don't like them, they're ugly, whatever. That's why I prefer white guys. And then so because there were a lot of that like over and over again. >> That sounds like they hate their dad.
5:53 >> That sounds less like self-hate and more like she just hates you guys. >> Yeah. >> You know what I mean? It's like if you're one of those guys that feels like it's attacking you, maybe she would hate you. Like it doesn't feel so much like self-hate. >> They just really had a bad experience with their dad and they're just taking out on every dude who who looks like who looks at all like their dad. >> Who reminds them of their dad at all like of every every little bit. >> Do you think it's always something else and not just the thing they're saying? Like if cuz most girls have a very simple response and they're just like I'm I just like white guys. And it's very like plain. There's no it's not deep. >> think it's >> I don't think it's deeper. I mean there are people who have obvious preferences where there are people who will say I will not date X race, which is I think more involving familial ████ or maybe even like an uncle groped them or something like we ████ we don't even know about that they're not going to talk about out
6:43 loud. >> Yeah, but there's also things like even if it's true, people don't say it. Like for example like I think like I think it's taboo for white women to say they won't want to date black guys, right? Because it's just like they'll be looked at as racist. So even if it's true, they're like I don't really like they never say it. Asian girls will say it. They'll say I only like white guys or like I only like this and it's like it's like well yeah because they're not afraid to be like like what do you call it like tab like saying taboo ████ >> is different when you say you don't like your own race versus if you don't like someone else's race. >> Yep. >> Yeah, that makes sense. >> Also like nobody's going to give a ████ if you say like if you're a white chick and you say I don't date white guys, everyone's going to be like let's ████ go, girl. Nobody's going to be like shame on you. What the ████ shame on you? >> I know. Other well, other white guys might get mad.
7:33 >> I've seen that too. Yeah, I've seen that where like if a well, the the the thing that white girls get is if they have a interracial kid with and they're single parent. And then they >> Hello, white guys are like, "See? That's what you get." >> I was like, "That is THAT IS ████ UP, DUDE." >> IT'S ████ YEAH. >> That's the part I never got, which is like, you know, people that they try to examine and judge from the outside. Uh you must be self-hating whatever, and I'm like, at the end of the day, if someone gets married with someone, that's the their life they're going to have to live with. >> Right. >> So, whatever it is, that's a decision that they're going to have to make. But I think the commenters are also probably like projecting some sort of insecurity that they have. And they just don't want to see that or whatever. >> Speaking of commenters, so some people might say what Stu just said about the Oxford study is BS because it was actually
8:24 about this other thing. No, so there's a Penn State study in 2010 called the New Suzy Wong Normative Assumptions of White Male and Asian Female Relationships, public published in an Oxford academic journal, which actually analyzes media stereotypes, and it does not provide dating preferences. >> Oh, okay. But then like I guess when it comes to that study or whatever, if it was real, I honestly would believe it. I think I would believe >> I mean, the highest If you look at the actual stats, the highest mixed marriages are Asian um female and white male. >> Yeah, and I don't I don't like I can't invalidate what is super obvious sociologically. Like black women as a community do complain about this. Asian guys as a community do complain about this. So, it's happening to them. They
9:15 are like feeling like their own race isn't dating them. It's true. That is happening. I don't know if it's happening at a scale that's measurable by exact data. >> Anecdotally true for them, and so that feels very real. >> Yeah, it's happening. But then how much of it is like Again, we always have to think about like what about the individual? Like are you just a ████ problem? Like you know what I mean? >> As a culture though, I can see that cuz I like at least being gay for from uh a lot of Chinese parents, they'll be like, "Oh, you come to America, you got to be like the white person." And you know, so you're always just thinking, okay, if I need to assimilate, I need to like white people are good, I got to be like the white people, I got to be American. And if you're growing up with that, I can see why Asian chicks would be like, "Oh yeah, I got to be with I got to be with the white dude." >> Actually, I don't know if the highest population is white man Asian girl. I actually think the highest population is
10:07 white man black woman for mixed for mixed marriage. But I think that's the highest per capita. Like Like as in like the Asian population is low, right? So like the or like the So the percentage is high for that rate mixed relationship, but the population of white man black woman, I think it's the highest mixed marriage group. >> It's white and Hispanic. >> Okay, white white and Hispanic. Okay. >> 42 43% of all of it. That's followed by white Asian 14 15, white black 11 12. >> Never mind. Yeah. >> White and Hispanic. >> White and Hispanic, makes sense. That's what I was That's what I was going for. >> Is it percent or population? >> It says the highest rate of interracial marriage in the USA involves white and Hispanic couples, accounting for approximately >> That's probably California and Texas combined. Skew the whole numbers. >> Yeah, that makes Yeah, because there's more people in California than really
10:57 anywhere in the US, yeah. >> Yeah, and then you add Texas, it's like, yeah. >> That's cool. >> I don't I don't know this is me, but I don't really count Hispanic as non-European. Cuz they're like part European. Most of them aren't full European. They just speak Spanish. It's just a weird American category. I don't really see them as non-white. Yeah. >> I think hella people do though. >> Like I sees them as something else. >> But ICE is Hispanic themselves. But I don't know. >> I think cuz they've had their own region long enough to have developed culturally significant changes, yeah. >> But they're Okay, but if you look at it like they're not they're still Western culture. They're not non-Western culture. >> but that would almost >> Spanish, they're Catholics, they
11:47 show emotions like Westerners, like >> Yeah, I would say you could argue that they assimilate the best for sure because of all that. >> Well, the only thing that's I think non-white about them is they're part indigenous. And not all of them are But so so here's the thing. Here's what's really confusing and Hannah pointed this out as a ████ white indigenous, right? >> Yeah. >> Why is it that Mexicans who are full white are minorities and like they're they're like not white here? And I was like, that's a good ████ point cuz she goes like, all these people look white to me. And then she's like, in Europe they would just be Spanish or Greek or like Italian. And then she's like, but in America Hispanics are looked upon as like not white. And then I had to do my own digging and I was like, oh ████ they're actually like ethnically full white. >> But people don't give a ████ They just
12:37 see the way you look and they go, that's a Hispanic dude. That's a you know, even like you guys know Peewee Flow? >> Yeah. >> He's from ████ Mexico. But but you look at that guy, you go, that guy's a white guy? Whitest guy I've ever seen in my life. If you didn't know him, then you just judge him and he gets that all the time. People are like, what are you talking about? You're Mexican, shut the ████ up. >> Like Cameron Diaz. >> Totally. >> She's white. White, you know? But yeah, anyways, I think that that con the idea of race here is so ████ stupid now. Like now thinking about it, the way we categorize and then the way we like kind of I think it's a it's a What happens is when we're all immigrants, we all try to keep some type of cultural ties to the motherland, so we're super ████ insecure about it. And I think that's why like the Asians here, the Mexicans here, even the white people here, like they have to constantly be like, I'm more
13:27 American than you're you are. You're not as American as me. You don't see the Europeans, you don't see Asians doing that ████ in Asia, you know? Like they know who they are. They've been in and I think that's where it's like and then so I even find it weird when people go like why don't you date your own kind? And I'm like Japanese and Chinese don't ████ date. Like that's new. But in America they don't date at all. Yeah, that's like that's different. But then in America we're the we're our own kind and I'm like when has it ever been our own kind? You know? Like that's to me that's that's an interracial relationship cuz you still got to learn a different culture, you got to learn their different languages. It's like it's not the same. We just look the same skin, that's it. But I I think all of it is ████ stupid, dude. >> Why don't you marry an Asian chick? >> I couldn't find one that could tolerate me. But that's the truth. If you think about
14:17 relationships >> very true though. Yeah. >> It's like a relationship is like it's already hard enough to keep one. Like it people that are making these comments, it's like you think it's so ████ easy to find one that you love and then you stay together for a long time without fighting. >> it. >> Yeah, regardless of race or anything. >> And it's even harder when they're not from your culture. So why the ████ would you make it harder on yourself? And I'm like looking at all these mixed relationships and I'm all like you don't have it easier than the people that come from the same culture. That's actually easier. >> Yeah, that is it's an easier way. >> I know me and Nikki are already going on 13 years. I think you're like what 15 years or some ████ I don't know I got to do the math. I don't even know. >> Yeah, you're right. But like but but like oh 18. >> 18? Jesus Christ. >> 18 years? Jesus, with Geo? Holy ████ I'm just kidding. What was your longest
15:08 relationship before Geo? >> 4 months. >> See what I'm saying? >> 4 months was your longest? God damn, dude. >> I got ADD, dude. >> Joe saying it's not ████ easy. I've been accidentally subscribed to things longer than 4 months. when >> when people reduce like you're with this person because they're a race and I'm like, "Dude, you think I could stay with someone for 20 plus years because of just cuz they're ████ race? Like that's the stupidest way to look at it." >> feels like a very easy counter argument. Let's say some some Chinese guy was like talking to you and he's like, "You should date someone Asian. Why are you doing that?" And you could just say, "Okay, you do it then." >> Yeah. >> And then if their answer is, "I can't because they only like white guys." >> Yeah. Then it's like, "No, it's your qualities." >> So wait, wait. You are ████ s█████. There's billions of Asians out there. You can't find one? You must be really miserable. YOU MUST BE A ████ loser.
15:59 >> That's the highest chance. >> It's the HIGHEST CHANCE. THERE'S 1 BILLION IN CHINA ALONE. Then go to Southeast Asia, there's billions of ████ Southeast Asians. Like Like you can't find one? You're a loser, bro. >> and then to put that in your ████ imagination that we're running out because of white guys is even funnier. >> Oh, the white people are taking it all. They're They're only like 5% of the world or some ████ They're a very small population. >> And then they're complaining about white guys fetishization or whatever. While they're Why are they not dating the Asians closest to them? Oh, they're not hot enough? Oh, sorry. You want a ████ Zhang Ziyi? Like what are you Who are you waiting for? >> All the guys complaining at the end of the day, they're just mad that they're not getting ████ thrown at >> Yeah, that's a different problem and that's that's what That's what's annoying to me is that you're not solving your problem by attacking it this way because that doesn't make you the desirable man. Like it actually
16:50 makes you worse. >> a guy that was in a loving, healthy relationship go out there and judge others and being like, "You got all the ████ women because you're white or whatever the ████ is going on." Like come on. If it's not whiteness, it's it's 6 ft or taller or whatever ████ Let's go, boys. Yeah, they got to have big ████ up. >> In order to have a valid argument, first you have to get proof that an Asian girl wanted to date you but couldn't cuz she has a white guy. >> Yeah, she secretly opine pines for you but she I'm stuck with my wife beater whitey at home. I got this guy who beats my ass. >> And that's never happened Gabe. >> And there's no women available. You have to if you're if if if there's literally no women available, then I I understand. >> Dude, exactly. >> He's like, "Yo, man. Like there's only
17:41 five girls here and there's 20 guys and they picked all the white ones." >> There's plenty of ████ amazing Asian single women who don't even know you. They will just like be like, "I know that you make your wife do crazy Asian ████ in the bedroom." Like as if I'm in there going like, "You make those eyes even more Asian. You ████ make the You ████ pull those things back and you ████ hike that kimono up, b████." Like it's absurd. Like but I do do that. >> You like ninja stars in your ass? >> I do do that.
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