0:00 thank you [Music] let's wait did you do it do it for another episode of just kidding news today we have Ryan as the whole okay [Applause] we'll introduce everybody this is Nick the ear why you look like a squirrel I'm a squirrel Anthony the nose okay okay wow good guys [Laughter] like those were jokes this what was that I think your nails was great with the nose anything else to say that's all yeah I don't have anything yeah that means the one for the first it should be Anthony the hair dude look at his hair it's really good hair you're
0:50 gonna backing them up but I'm just saying that happened I'm not insecure your hair is great it's a great hair your hair overpowers everything Ryan the host Nick the ear so uh no article right now we're off the Record um I thought this would be a really cool uh thing to talk about it might really help somebody but um we've all done different things in our lives we've we've been around quite a bit that we've had different Ventures and and attempted several different projects not all of them work out um how do you stay positive when something you're doing is failing I'll go first uh you ████ learn from your mistake and you move on so you move on that's the simple answer from the from the thing you're doing you quit doing it sounds easier it sounds easy but it's actually not because one the
1:41 thing that mostly holds you back is your pride your ego from your previous identity from whatever that is because it's like true look if you use the fans don't need fortune cookie answers they want to know real ████ what failed and what are you talking about dude I'll tell you what the meat so that's true because that's just sounds like every other ████ answer that you get on like a meme on an Instagram inspirational page that's the fast answer I'm gonna explain it okay okay explain it to you so garage sales all right let's say ████ so one of the main things is I feel like my dance career right A lot of people don't see that but to me I feel like I failed in my dance career but then that was the old me like a few years ago but you want ABDC what are you talking about that was the end of it right some of us went on the show and
2:31 lost can yeah no but here's something grateful no here's the thing though like even if you win and you have this successful uh career and then it stops it makes you feel like you're a failure okay because it's like how come I'm not getting any more shows or how come uh my manager ████ stole money from me and now we have to get a new manager and all this ████ starts happening you're like did my business just fail and then you start questioning yourself so that's when I was like okay so if this makes me a failure what do I do now and why does it make me a failure right but then when you you won't know that until you go through like whatever and then you realize like it's you're not failing if you keep going because then you can just keep building right yeah yeah I would like to apologize for my earlier comments that was very real
3:24 that's really cool of you to kind of request that statement I'm just saying man that's so funny no because that that's like kind of the thing was I realized that like why am I basing my identity and my career just on Dancing you know because like if if I didn't do this anymore as a dancer and then people could be like oh like your your career is not nothing anymore because you don't do it anymore but it's like because you know how like some celebrities they have their Golden Era and then it just ends and it's like oh they're nobody they're not relevant anymore so that's what was going on in my head it's like are we relevant are we not relevant but then at the same time it's just kind of me beating myself up and making myself think that but then once I let go of that and I let go of my previous identity and just kind of let it die then it allowed me to kind of feel like oh shoot like in it was never really
4:15 there it's just something that you make up in your head yeah yes follow-up question do you still want to dance for your career dude I'm still dancing he just dances yeah where he goes so what I what I uh realized was like I was never even in control of my career in the first place because at that time it was just the opportunities that were just coming and for me all I did was just dance and take these opportunities and ride that wave exactly because even though uh there's not as much opportunities now it's not my fault so I didn't fail it's just how things are right now because I still practice I still do everything I do to like maintain my talent and everything but the thing is if there's no opportunities here it's either I'm not looking for them but or also it's just not the right time well you're not creating it either but but also you have a business now so
5:05 you're not really yeah but also um I realized that I don't want to be stuck to just one thing because to me like I think change is growth and if you're not constantly Reinventing yourself or changing something you you're gonna feel that same feeling of like oh no my career is not where it used to be then how can I make it better and you're chasing that right but the moment you start chasing it that's when I feel like it's you're setting yourself up for like the crash but it's such a fine life because sometimes you're like uh if I don't chase it then I'm not doing my I'm not working hard enough or creating opportunities it says you though but then the that's only see the thing is even though you chase it and if it doesn't come it's like it was never yours yeah exactly but yeah that's actually what's the question again
5:55 uh how do you manage when you how do you stay positive while you're failing for Joe okay okay so it doesn't always have to be entire projects like maybe it's we take it more the individual level how do you stay positive when you're bombing on a set sorry I I don't look at that you're like you're like you know let's not talk so let's get specific when you're bombing I never bomb I'm I'm fighting all of them no I think standing goes you always but I feel like that's what everything like everybody like fails like it and everybody you have to bomb and you have to yeah but then I who who said it first is
6:45 like they're like it's how you take it like you're like earlier when people said God damn your ears remember yeah no I'm just saying look I'm just Anthony said that Ryan was the one that said you were bombing dude not me I know [Laughter] sorry what were you saying I love you I I never um thought of so like when when people say that stuff like how do you stay positive or whatever right I think like it can be easily misunderstood as suppressing your issues and stress and
7:35 keeping a smile right like and then so for me I'm more impulsive so like if I'm pissed I'm pissed if I'm if I'm feeling it I'm feeling it but I think what the key is is how do you get back up and try again when you've been slapped in the face a thousand times and so you don't have to stay happy because I mean naturally who does feel happy when s███'s going down but I think the the strength in it all is to remember what you're in it for the first place and then get back and go again and I think that becomes easier to do once you've built the confidence in achieving things so I think there's different stages in someone who goes out and challenges themselves to pursue something the first stage is like hey I might be doing something that that isn't safe or traditional like like maybe I'll
8:26 go pursue my own passion or whatever and then the first stage is can I even support myself doing this right and then you go and then you might get pushback from family members you might get people ridiculing you like you'll never ever be a dancer or whatever the ████ right don't say it's like a ████ movie right that sounds like the choreographer talking yeah and then and then you get to that Scott what it takes you get to that stage and then you you're you're actually paying the bills now and and whether it's your own business or something that you kind of doubted yourself in and you're proving to yourself that oh cool I could put my mind to something and I can achieve it then the next stage is well how do I be remarkable or different or like how do I be a legend or how do I do something like you want to grow within what you do right and then you might even get burnt out because like 15 years of doing
9:16 something you might be like I'm kind of bored of the same space the same people maybe I want some other stimulation maybe I'll do another sport or something different and I think it's like this constant pursuit of like this is I'm curious about this but I do think there's a breakthrough where you no longer question can I do this am I good enough you just know so that anything you put your mind to you just keep trying and it's just time that's all it is practice and time and getting better over and over and over and over and then it's just that repetition where you become better at something do you have any examples from your life where you do this I think right now so like um during covid you know the only thing I had going for myself was JK news right and that was my highlight it's like it was
10:07 really fun but we were I used to do JK seven days a week but kovid was like I'm only seeing you guys every two weeks and then we shut down a lot of channels the fun part was it was the first time in many many years where I had total freedom like I wasn't in a relationship I could do whatever I want I could travel the world if I wanted to I'm calling my homies up and we're like snowboarding every ████ day till our legs are dead and then so that was really fun because I was like this is what what it's like to be retired and then I did it for a year and I realized no matter what something felt empty like like you can't just Chase desires and fun like after a while you go to your favorite restaurants every single ████ day then it gets to the point of like it's not it's normal so then it's like
10:59 it's like you can't chase feelings right of of what do you call it like stimulation then you go I need something that I can fight against I need something and one of the best things that actually happened to me was losing over like seven figures and wiping out almost all of the money I had because then it brought me back to the space of like I have nothing well I had a little bit but I had just enough to invest back into jumbi in Hawaii and now this became my fight and that became like I have to make this work because if I had 1.5 mil in my bank account I would have not taken it seriously and I told my partners this too like that's actually a good thing that happened to this because I would have just paid a bunch of people as much as I could to solve and just keep it running and I wouldn't care if it made money but then
11:50 but then because that happened to me and I kind of hit rock bottom not really but I was just enough so it was just enough to where I could pay for it it was just enough to where I could pay my bills but it was enough to make me afraid like I lost everything bro that's crazy yeah yeah and then when I was in Hawaii like I'm just like now I'm driven now I'm like this has to work if this doesn't ████ work I fail all my partners I fail every everything and then and then I felt alive and happy and it was the weirdest feeling because it's like I had more Bank in my in my bank last year but I wasn't this happy struggling and fighting to make it work yeah you know that's why I think failure is an illusion that we create for ourselves but I think that it's disguised as failure but we're really what it is is
12:40 like life setting a fire under you to just say hey go now or else do something yeah yeah that's what it really is but you wouldn't have that perspective if you didn't have a lot and then lose it and then if you just was struggling the whole time you wouldn't feel the way the the gratefulness that you feel unless you get that perspective of either I mean you shave yourself I think like um I thought I wanted the passive income and retired life I thought I wanted that and I dreamed about it and then when I actually had it it's true what people say like like that stuff is not everything you ask actually lose a sense of motivation and purpose yeah so then so then getting to that point this point right now is I'm in a much more happier place even though I'm more stressed and
13:30 then like they're like are you okay like my family members are just like dude I know you lost a lot a lot I'm like I'm actually way happier and and the best way I can explain it is like you know when you play a game or sports right like it gets intense because you're really in it so you could get angry there's a lot of emotions but at the end of the day it's stressful but you love it and then you end the game and then you feel the relax like relief like that was a great ████ game I might have lost I might have won but the game was sick and I felt like alive the journey man that's that's really what it feels like you wouldn't have that if you had so much yeah yeah I think I think that was the key is experiencing the retirement phase and then realizing it's not for me and that's why I see why people they actually die after retirement or they
14:20 get into depression after the retirement like you lose your purpose yeah that's deep Bro yeah so then the idea of failure to me I think it's changed is um definition because I definitely do believe the word failure I was afraid of fail like when I was doing JK and then like I I quit college or I mean I finished college and I was like I'm not gonna do the regular nine to five I'm gonna do YouTube I was afraid of failing I was afraid of like I'm not gonna make enough money doing this yeah and then every year went by and I'm paying the bills and then and then it becomes abundant you become successful enough to where you can pay for a team and everything and then you're afraid to fail like and not being able to pay your team and it's
15:10 always there but the definition of failure changes because someone might see that you're successful but you might think you're not you're failing yeah but I don't know if now I see failure the same way as I did before like I'm not afraid to fail in the same way anymore yeah that was really good that was very good yeah anybody else no I kind of roll out after that I feel like you tied that up on a nice little bow and you know let's go back to your bombing though but I I don't know you not kill yourself it must be so embarrassing up there but you guys are all self-employed and like entertainers or entrepreneurs in your own right like you know what I'm talking about when it comes to those
16:00 stages right and in the beginning everyone has that fear of can I do it yeah and it can I pay for like my life doing what I want to or I never thought I'd be able to pay my bills doing what I do just like training people or like yeah being a coach what's up is it not good it can it's like really stressful sometimes no his bills are just that low yeah I just I live in my white pace for everything I'm not but like you know you you always question like can I do this is this a real job people always tell you like oh you might like how do you survive how do you pay for things and there's times where it's like real slow and like with clients and people are out of town like this is like slow seasons and you're just like ████ how am I gonna pay for this and you have that anxiety but like sometimes you need you're back against the wall for you to
16:50 actually push yourself to try to do something different right that growth that you're looking for because otherwise if there's not a fire under your ass then what the ████ else are you going to do sometimes you get really comfortable I think that's like it's really easy to do that and sometimes um over the years of doing this for so long there's been times where I'll kind of like coast and be like oh yeah things are going good you know I have clients I'm booked up a lot and then when the slow season hits you're like oh ████ oh man like I can't do this anymore I need to make sure that you're always kind of pushing forward and trying to like add more things to your business or trying to find a new way to gain leverage in in what you're doing because otherwise like that sense of security like you you always feel like you need it in a lot of ways but it's it's I think it's you need to
17:42 leverage it by trying to find new ways to improve either your business and finding that Leading Edge because otherwise you kind of get stale and you get complacent and sometimes it does take like covid to ████ slap you in the face and realize like oh yeah your job could be taken away from you like that and then you have no ████ living like for so long I never thought I'd be able to train people online or like coach people or or like understand how to like for for so long I was always in a gym and I was like this is my safety net I'm totally cool seeing clients all day whatever and then once that was taken away from me I realized like what the ████ am I gonna do and I was spanking dude I was freaking the ████ out I was like I don't know what I'm gonna do I'm gonna live in a ████ box and then it forced me to be like okay there's a whole nother thing like the internet that can help you like you know build your business or or
18:34 leverage something else for yourself and bolster like a little bit more support and if it wasn't for that I would have never done that because so many people like Joe would be like you should coach people online and I was like no dude and like and part of it is ego right because you feel like you you know everything you feel like and these guys have had so many conversations with me and I'm like no I think I'm gonna do it this way and I'm like oh what a ████ idiot it's also Comfort yeah it's comfort you want to build your business in the way you want to build it yeah yeah and it's it's an experience and sometimes you need to get humbled by everything and you realize that like once you pull back a little bit it's so much of the reason why you don't do things is your own ego and like what Ken said like you think you know everything you think you you've done it all but in reality you don't know ████ ████ about nothing dude yeah what does Ruth
19:24 say in uh Ozarks you don't know ████ about ████ you don't ████ about ████ Alice too here's another thing that people don't really talk about is like if you decide to quit your coaching or you decide to quit Dancing you decide to quit it's like you're not really quitting it's all good it's a pivot ████ fine yeah it doesn't matter but if you like something then yeah if you like oh I like this thing then you could give up because I think about that with comedy all the time but if it doesn't work out and like let's say you're absolutely ████ no income from this nothing and you decide you know what I'm just gonna ████ be a lawyer or some ████ dude nobody's gonna give a ████ like except for you you're the only one that punishes your softly and that's where you fail right but then it's like why do we have to believe that you're holding yourself back yeah but what if you don't have another thing that you like or like want to do then then and then you're like well I'm failing at this then I'm just I try
20:15 harder then the semis try harder yeah you just might not know that you like to do something else right that's that's true too like he might say like you know the thing that's stopping me from trying online stuff is like my ego but there's like a other side to that same you know sword where it's like the thing that's allowing you to go and try something else is support from your friends like I say this all the time like when you to answer that question when it's like how do you say positive during failure I've said this before on this channel I'll say it again to me it always comes down to my support system and my friends and my peers because if you don't have friends if you don't have friends we'll Circle back but no that's that's the real deal like any time and I've this probably happened to me twice in my life where I've gotten to like a serious Funk like something just I just couldn't you know it was just a lot right here yeah the thing
21:05 that got me out of that wasn't necessarily the variables of my life and my circumstances that was my perspective on them it was my people around me right at the lowest lowest point I ever had I literally had to rationale with myself and be like all right who is my homie who's willing to kick with me and am I looking I'm looking at those people like these are great human beings so like if they're good people I have to be okay at least and that would help me you know what I mean or when they're telling me hey try this try that that stuff and being able to rely on the support of people that I trust that maybe I value their opinion especially in the time of my own darkness of vision like that's the kind of stuff that gets me going I don't talk about this much or definitely not as much as Joe but I was in that same boat I also have my hands on over a million dollars this past year and I lost it as well yeah we all got invested into the same ████
21:57 yeah it's so funny to make fun of my failures huh I wasn't trying I thought that's a good joke Jason wanted to say orgies I'm sorry that's the theme of the day I didn't think about your failures yeah but no like seriously it's like going from that I had really really good friends around me at that time that I like really like they helped me cope and I will never share like the depths of how like far into my failure I felt but if I didn't have very very close people at that time supporting me 100 like that ████ would have been way harder to deal with if I didn't have even homies in this group that were calling just like yo are you are you good yeah that would have ████ I I probably would have been in way more Darkness so having a support system having a group of people
22:47 that can think clearer than you when you're in times of Darkness I think is super super and we all bounce back together I think we all the shared experience made it made the blow a little bit less bad I think totally because we all had each other that were like we lost a lot of our almost all of our fortunes like with nothing left in our bank account that was pretty ████ hard that's crazy and mentally too when you're there especially in this part of the adult life I remember thinking crazy thoughts I was like dude I'm gonna retire dancing you know what I mean like you put yourself in a totally different lifestyle mindset you know what I'm saying and then something very drastic happens as you quote unquote out of your control and suddenly you have to like switch all these wires again you wanna you were in the same boat sorry oh ████ yeah but you know like again like the very very first thing that happened after that after
23:38 like in your mind nothing but like Despair and loss is you realize nothing in your life is really that different than before you even had that great it's all in the head yeah it's like every reason an account it's all in the head the same it's still right there but then also too for your guys situation like you could choose and I think sometimes people get wrapped up in this where they I don't say like choosing to be a victim about certain things is just not helpful for anybody right like you could sit there and be like ████ I lost it all and like that could be what your world is but sometimes like you said like pivoting to other things and looking to the other direction of like my support and understanding that like oh yeah pulling back the lens a little bit and understanding that your life isn't that different from what you thought you had before so sometimes it's it's a matter
24:29 of just reframing and just realizing that okay I lost that it is what it is let's just move forward in simple like that mental shift of just like all right what's next that's the only thing you can do too two things one I just want to say that real quick that it's so cool that to have everybody here that uh was in a ████ up situation and then came back and then are able to share that's so nice yeah and then because you guys are okay with uh you know yourself a little bit more and you also because that's why I feel like you all have empathy that that's so nice because not every group has that that's one and uh two I forgot number two after some multiples but not everybody come out of it oh that's my number two oh okay yeah wavelength my boy that's so nice but I
25:21 do think like what everyone has gone through to get to that uh point of confidence right like going through multiple what other people will say failures I would just say challenges of proving to yourself you can do something um that gets you ready for that mental endurance of risk and loss so like it's it's it has to happen over increments of time like the more you separate from doing what you're told to do and more you go into doing what you tell yourself to do yeah you start to build up a different view of the world and now instead of being a reaction to what happens to whatever's going on in the world you're no longer a victim now you're in control of your destiny and then you no longer question can I do
26:12 this now it's just I'm gonna do it and spend time toward doing it and then when you're there you forget that time when you used to be afraid of doing something even like someone who's like hey I I'm I'm gonna try dancing you probably might see it in your students or whatever like someone's afraid to even try working out or try because their mind is like I don't think I'm capable of doing it and we're like you're so stupid all you got to do is practice everyone's capable yeah but then that's the stage that you forget that you're in and people could stay there for the rest of the ████ life it's a really big mental shift and it reminds me of this analogy that this monk made where it's like if you're drowning in the river that those are your problems right you're drowning in a river but if you can imagine yourself watching the river then you're out of it it's like stepping away and changing your perspective it's like most people
27:03 don't realize they're even in that River it's like but if you step away from it and you look at it as a river it's like oh ████ I'm not in it anymore you know so it's like for you the whole crash and everything it's like but you got to remember it's like you're still here you still got people you still got yeah you've still got you and and you can build build it back so you say people love me and the same people hate me nothing changed yeah it's really hard to see it though exactly that's why you got to use analogies but also don't you think you just figure it out you'll figure it out in time it's just not yeah but in time so yeah this was a crazy some people aren't patient when uh when crypto and Luna and stuff like that crashed and we like lost all it's coming back really really short period of time there were people you remember this there were people that were afraid of committing suicide they're just coughing themselves yeah I remember like in a short in that week there was like over eight people that like straight up committed suicide but my personal
27:54 journey I also remember like like friends calling me who knew I was part of it and we're like yo like I heard like the stuff's going down like are you okay and then I remember being like oh yeah I'm I'm fine but then thinking to myself like you for calling me that's yeah holy ████ that's love yeah I think yeah I think I'm good yeah let me check myself but because you asked me you know and it's like you you end up realizing that the most valuable things you know what I'm saying like are often times like still right there if you just happen to pay attention to that versus the thing that you're going through [Music] foreign
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