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NakedMan Found on Thai Beach after MassiveBender with No Recollection

#comic#drunk#jason#beer#punch
the transcript auto-captions · entered into evidence

0:00 and then he's talking to her and I just run up to him and I'm just waiting and I guess I just ████ socked him in the face she got knocked out for sure dude and then what happened and then what happened they took him home so I'm gonna start blowing the guy ████ wait wait the glimp the glimpse of glimp [Music] so there was a uh and this is one of those we've almost all been there before let's see how we all relate there was a naked British man who was found on a Thai beach after a massive party with no recollection of the last two days this sounds like a hangover it really does actually everybody is comparing this to The Hangover I just think it's funny that you've got this photo right here are they party hard dude it sounds like my second quinceanera sitting along the beach is just staring

0:51 at the ocean you know what the ████ happened I don't mind TJ he's all butt naked so yeah just like the hangover this guy was discovered on a Thai beach with no memory of what happened after two days the unidentified man who is age 30 from Epsom Surrey is somewhere in the UK I believe has been celebrating his birthday with beer and marijuana on a session that began on the 27th of October he was discovered two days later by stunned locals in Koh Samui stumbling around and singing football songs before beer and marijuana I think I think that's what he's probably doing more ████ yeah he was in the country for a wedding and was traveling on a tourist visa and while

1:41 the a fisherman attempted to help the man when he was in the water he allegedly became aggressive and screamed that he wanted to go and meet with God nobody believed it was just things like beer and marijuana so they do a drug test on him and it's negative there's no drugs really no drugs uh despite his protest the fisherman was able to save him by pulling the man because he's schizophrenic people are just saying maybe it's like like the dehydration from partying and like the Sun but he gets a little cuckoo or whatever like that he gets hot sweats low tolerance yeah I'm pretty sure that's what it was but regardless it did inspire me to think about maybe some of the times that we've kind of had those kind of Benders you said it reminds you of your second quinceanera you got two Quinceaneras I mean I got invited to Quinceaneras you're not getting together yes you get them all the time right yeah for sure is

2:32 there a big celebration for dudes yeah no of course I thought they're called quinceaneros oh here we go and there's a masculino so in the Filipinos have this thing called the debut right a debut yeah for for girls it's like quinceanero so he he he's such a ████ troll he begged his dad to have one and he's like ████ man he goes all right so for his for his 15th birthday he got to have one and then I think it's 16 for the Philadelphia yeah 16 but but he wanted to wear a suit and do a whole birthday thing and the whole day was a big troll oh that's that well that you know that sounds like fun so yeah you look like a guy who's been ████ up before though like oh dude tell us a ████ up story uh yeah I mean I have a bunch like I'm Latino we you know I mean we started

3:23 drinking at ████ 10 we're like ████ so I have ████ up stories for days but tell us a story when you were 10. when I was 10 dude I remember when we were 10 we would Jack our parents beer that's the thing we were jacking will go and the corner we'll drink it and stuff yeah and uh who's we my cousins you mean my cousins would just like get ████ up and then I remember the first time I got ████ up I I had like a 40 but in Mexico they call it kawamas yeah so then Malt Liquor they uh no dude it was just like a it's not like a 40 it's like a it's just like it's not like a big old yeah it's not like an actual ████ 40 but to them it's like a kind of let's go anyways but I remember the first time I got ████ up I remember they opened it up my cousin's endurance was like chug it I've never chugged but I tried to impress them because that's some girls there and I was like I'm looking in the corner of the girls looking at me yeah they're they're rolling over here

4:15 right and then I was almost halfway all right I did it and they put it away and then I was like and they're like my cousin tells me in 15 minutes you're gonna get ████ up and I was like all right like when is this gonna happen I've never been drunk before so I'm like what is this gonna happen what's gonna what's going on and then suddenly you just start everything starts feeling heavy and and you know your eyes are just what that's your first time getting drunk first time getting drunk and I remember going like whoa and I remember feeling like a kid like just childish and you were a kid and I felt more like a kid where I just felt like Invincible I remember I started running on the street because I remember thinking like I can't feel my legs and I feel like I'm running really fast I can run really fast without getting tired because I'm not feeling my legs so then I just thought it and I just everybody's in conversation I'm just like ████ we're almost there running like what the ████

5:06 happened though he's living Wall Street kid ████ you know yeah like I was doing like kid ████ you know like run running around in circles and you know just ████ climbing on ████ jumping and not hurting seeing if it hurts kid ████ yo that's what happens when kids get drunk yes and uh and yeah then I remember just being like ████ drunk and being young doesn't has there ever been in time as a drugstore where you just woke up like this dude where you just don't remember like you blacked out yeah I do remember I don't know if is this patreon nah no just keep it real dude just just censor some stuff I mean yeah censor the details you want I remember because I remember I was at the club and I remember taking a shot and then I remember talking to this girl and then I remember just taking shots and shots and then suddenly we just drink the tequila bottle like that at the club and everything was cool and I remember

5:57 just moments of of with her in the restroom and then like little when I go back and then a guy punching me and I'm like getting punched and I go back and I'm at a taco stand and I'm like throwing up and then I go back to the club and then I punched a guy and I remember just like about fight breaks down different guy different guy no the same guy same guy so what happens apparently what happened yo so apparently what happened is that they I ████ got ████ up and I was talking to the guy's girl and then the guy was like what the ████ is the rest you're making out and then he ████ gets me punches me and I ████ get thrown out and then you got Rumble but he stayed and then I got thrown out and I was just pissed and walking around and I ate a taco and in my head I'm just thinking like you know what I'm gonna ████ this fool up so I snuck back in the club he was making out with her yeah

6:48 after and then he's talking to her and I just run up to him and I'm just waiting and I guess I just ████ socked him in the face she got knocked out for sure dude and then what happened and then what happened he took him home so I'm gonna start blowing the guy ████ wait wait wait and then back to Tacos ████ Butterfly Effect I've ever had in my ████ life it was all over the place man I just remember like showing up to an ex-girlfriend's house and I was there and he's saying sorry yeah I snuck in a room and I just ████ you know and I woke up like what the ████ just happened that sounds like a good night that was a crazy like night that's legit but that's the thing when I get drunk I get very like aggressive like the machista Mexican ████ comes out you need multa yeah no is the worst for me you get more rest I start thinking about life why am I here Spanish why are we here really

7:38 what's going on what is this it's like does everybody not acknowledge the fact that we're like human what is what's going on I think yeah we're just acknowledging it dude the fact that we all work and have jobs and I'm like why why are we here we have an existential crisis sometimes you need that though what's that what's that exponential what exactly what you just explained together questioning your life Your Existence am I gay huh yeah well yeah maybe maybe I do I do question everything so when you know these are still good questions even sober for sure I should just have more of those yeah we should just think about it a little more often crises existential that's pretty cool no getting high nah dude I I start tripping out you done other drugs no that's it the weed is like I can only handle weed and that's it like so do you when you drink do you are you more likely to get into a fight with somebody yes have you

8:29 do you have any good fight stories you uh I have all my life fight stories dude yeah my life was ████ you know what it is I'm that I was that guy that was like you talk ████ to me like you'll say something like hey what y'all dude what the ████ what the ████ you say so in my head I'm like all right so then I'm drinking and you for you're in the ████ bar you're like oh it's your friend I'm watching like I can't feel my legs I'm still like I want revenge for that little moment that just happened like I'm looking for Revenge so I'm just like waiting and then two in the morning I just ████ just boom like what the ████ happened I'm just ████ fighting everybody now you watch out for that yeah bleeding everybody's bleeding just because of the ████ hey watch out dude that's all it was but in my drawing he should have been nicer though he disrespected homie you don't disrespect

9:20 like that's just better that's my parents ████ disrespective and I'm taking out on this guy any therapy and ████ yeah and it probably was that it probably wasn't in my head escalated it in my head I heard ████ with y'all you stupid never gonna be nobody that's what I heard that's what I heard but all he said was like hey what y'all dude you're gonna fall yeah you're gonna fall yeah yeah dude watch out dude and I'm like hey he should have watched out though you don't know me Dad it's like what yeah so I have a lot of problems as to how to work out yeah I went out you should go fight with Nick he he helps work out a lot of aggression oh dude I will look too my gym yeah it's called Lionheart Jiu Jitsu Academy oh dude I'm sure dude

10:10 I'm trying to get into Jiu Jitsu a little bit my guy dude I just did it recently and I was like it's her Academy her last name is Lionheart ████ yeah dude I'm down really helps you deal with yourself literally literally I was like two days ago I was looking up like ████ spots on my dad yeah we will work out those those traumas thank you yeah you get to beat the ████ out of each other you know feel better you know yeah I'll put you with Nick he's one of my top guys and we'll work it out yeah he's a top guy I like him yeah not really I'm more like a bottle oh yeah I'm more of a bottom yeah I'll sit on my butt and everything dude yeah dude he works both ways though he's pretty good but yeah we should go drinking sometime yeah no I put the problems are calm try to fight calm comic like which ones any famous ones no no let's talk about it that was just like Comics I would just try to fight all the time I was on the road are they

11:00 ████ though they're being dicks though it was me any comments if I could punch a comic yeah oh ████ uh which comic could I ah I don't know which which comic would I ████ Russell Peter no he's cool I don't have nobody that Bobby Lee Chris Sosa christosa he's pretty punchable yeah I don't know if there's a comic that I wish I could punch Jason Cheney you know Jason I love Jason Cheney I'll punch him for sure dude and he'd be like oh that's so nice oh wow you just punched me why yes that's good Jason is ████ hilarious this is my one of my good friends dude there it is and we're gonna punch you Jason yeah when I see you dude just know it just know where he came from dude yeah

12:00 foreign

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