0:05 Welcome to another episode of Careful Boys. We have Mr. Jason Cheny with us today. >> [applause] >> Thank you >> [cheering] >> Thank you guys so much. Okay, Jason. If it's a guarantee that after you die, you will become a ghost, how would you like to spend your haunting days? I think I would do all the stuff. Like what? Maybe I um You're also only allowed to be Like you can only haunt one place. One place. >> barrier? You got to pick where you want to haunt and how you want to haunt it. Um just got uh this bedroom. >> [laughter] >> Well, what if she moves? What if she dies? Oh, she >> Then she becomes a ghost, too. Never mind. Another person. [laughter] Um uh Barack Obama. You just want to haunt him every >> No. Uh oh, I can only haunt one place?
0:57 One place or a portion. Isn't that the rule of the uh Yeah. You can't just You can't just like change the the whole like reason for your haunting because, you know, they got to be able to solve it. Can he Can he interact with the physical world? Like can he like knock cups over and stuff? >> what you If that's how you want to be, yeah, you let me know. Wow. I maybe just uh I don't know why out of all the Careful Boys, I would like to haunt um I would probably go to Anthony's house for >> [laughter] >> Why is everyone trying to ████ with Anthony all the time? And And then I go to Nick Nick But you can't get stuck to a place. Oh, ████ Unless Anthony gets a exorcist and gets you released or something. >> Anthony himself, then wherever he goes, you go. No, I feel like after a while it'll be it'll be not fun. >> [laughter] >> But if I haunt Nick, I think it'll be fun. That'll be really fun. Yeah. Like
1:49 um maybe I tickle him a little bit. >> Yeah, well, he's trying to roll with somebody. And just move his hand Move his hand now. What the ████ is that? >> go? Yeah, and um when he's sleeping, he does the mouth tape. Right? And I pinch his nose, also. >> [laughter] >> You know? He thinks he has sleep apnea. He has sleep apnea. Yeah, okay. When he's waking up. That's funny. Right? Yeah. And I and I whisper to Tiffany, "Sorry." You know what's a good one? You should go to his go to his stove and just a little Okay, just a little just a little bit just a little bit. >> [laughter] >> Two days ago I I could have sworn I There's no way. >> [laughter] >> Yeah, that'd be a good one. Yeah, I I don't um what else way do a hunting, maybe. I probably I probably go to
2:39 uh maybe I go to my grandma's house. Why? [laughter] You want to haunt your grandma? No, I don't want to haunt her. I just want to like um maybe sleep with her sometimes. Oh, for comfort? Like cuddle with your grandma? >> I don't know what but one place is so hard though. >> [laughter] >> What's the afterlife? You'd be so Wouldn't you be bored? Yeah, I would >> That's what I I think I'd be. Like if I was a ghost, I'd be so bored. >> I think I'd just miss her. That's how I would haunt her for a day. I suppose Yeah, you'll be bored. She's not going to be a She's not going to be a ghost too. >> That's a sentence though. Like if you could only haunt one person and one place, that's such a sentence. >> Oh, I feel bad for ghosts now. >> Yeah, see? Yeah, they all probably all chose wrong. >> Yeah, they're like, "F███, bro. This is This is sucks, man. They're like, "How many more times I got to watch this guy jack off?" >> Imagine if Imagine it's just >> [laughter] >> Jessica Alba's bedroom just packed. A
3:29 bunch of ghost sausage party. I know. You guys ████ ████ are you too Everyone wanted to get here. God damn Now you're in a room full of horny guys. And then she moves and they're all just in that room together. And then [laughter] like a ████ stoner kid moves in and you're like, "Now I just got to watch this guy smoke weed and watch movies. Like what the f███?" How How envious do you think a a in like a apartment building is in comparison to a house cuz a house you only haunt the house Do you know in a apartment building you every day you could go to you could go to Sandeep's room. >> have 50-year mortgages. >> [laughter] >> And be like damn I'm going to look at these people for a long time. It's just me staring at the wall. That's true. Maybe a hotel. Hotel yeah, hotel would be nice. things to do. >> Yeah yeah yeah yeah that'd be cool a hotel. >> Like hundreds of rooms, they have like a ballroom, gym. Yeah. You can do many
4:21 things and you can socialize with other ghosts and ████ It's like the it's like a whole >> Everyone else who chose that gets to yeah. It reminds me of that ghost show where they buy that bed and breakfast and then there's like all those uh there that lady could see the ghosts and ████ >> TV show? Yeah it's a TV show. I forgot the name of it but And then it's the same rules like some ghosts it depends on where you're where you died right? You could like travel like there's no barrier and then so you could go from place to place but a lot of the ghosts like if you died in like the store or if you died in like the house that's your barrier. What? >> Yeah. Wait okay what if you could go place to place but you can't like I I think it'll be more boring for ghosts to go through wall. Because you're just cutting the wall and then Do you know what I mean? Like too fast but then if like you ghost and then
5:12 you're like have to go through stairs or take the elevator open the door accidentally and you can slip through. Slip [laughter] through. And then now you can complain to other ghosts bro this is my ████ didn't open the door for 20 minutes >> [laughter] >> but then but if you cut through wall what the ████ you going to talk about? Okay amazing. >> You want to be stopped by physical barriers if you're a ghost? If I was a ghost so we could have a thing to talk about cuz imagine you just cut through all the walls how's your day bad? >> So that means you could be floating around You want to have resistance in your life. >> Let's say you're floating around and then you're you're haunting a house that has like a child in it and he's doing imaginary kung fu. He could be beating the ████ out of you and you don't even know. >> You feel it 30%. Like however hard he hits 30% I'm crazy. And you're like, "F██████ damn it." >> [laughter] >> 30% of whatever the real power is, you
6:03 feel it 30%. But you move though. That's always a weird thing too is like if you can move through walls, wouldn't you just fall through the floor? Yeah, but you know. But you can also float too. >> Yeah, you float. Yeah, you float. I see. All right. So it's up to you like where you're where you're going I guess. But then that's boring, no? I think it'd be fun to to haunt like SoFi Stadium and then you could just mess with every sports game that happens. Oh. Turn off or if there's a concert, turn off the auto-tune. Midway. Just oh my god. Yeah. Sports would be crazy where you just have to touch the basketball an inch. Like whether if it's going to go in or not, it just goes, "What the hell?" >> [laughter] >> A prank paradise. Yeah, I just mess with everybody. I'd love to be at a hotel casino. Oh.
6:53 Cuz then Casino? You mess with the odds? Odds? You could ████ with the people in the rooms. I feel like they have the most energy. 50 times in a row on the roulette table? Cuz then don't you feel like that would be a very big haunting zone? >> be so good. >> Cuz like a lot of ghosts would be having fun cuz there's people up 24/7, hella excitement, hella emotions and you could ████ with so many people. Like, "Ooh, I'm going to win." And you're like, "Uh, no you're not." >> Yeah, you get the cocky guy on dice all day. And you have that one person that's like, "Oh, it's my last dollar." And then they put IT IN AND >> [screaming] >> YEAH, AND YOU'RE LIKE, "YEAH." That is a really cool one. Yeah, that's good. See, that's how you should answer. That's a good one. >> [laughter] >> Casino. He said grandma's house. >> [laughter] >> Cuz he could sleep with her. So he could sleep with grandma every
7:43 night. >> Try to be sweet. >> [laughter] >> That's what you get for trying to be heartwarming. What would you you want to haunt Barbara Brigade? No. I think It just make weights heavier for people. >> No, I like I like hotel casinos because there's a variety of people. >> Yeah, it's like you could haunt a restaurant, you could haunt a you know, you could haunt people while they're ████ like what what happened between me and Hannah at the Luxor. You wouldn't want to haunt uh Tyga to see him grow up and all that? Oh, I'll be his protector. >> [laughter] >> Imagine instead you're like, I didn't think of that. Here I am at the freaking Rio. I am stuck there. No, no, yeah, I'll be his protector. He's stuck [laughter] at the Paris. I'll be his protector and help everything uh either go his way or make it a little bit harder so he
8:34 learns good lessons. >> Wow. Yeah. That's pretty cool. Yeah, like if he's like All right, let's say he's becomes a soccer superstar at his school he's getting big-headed. Then when the ball he starts kicking it towards the goal I'll make the ████ ball that goes somewhere else. He's like, what the ████ I feel like that's what our ancestors would do. You think so? I think so. Oh, shoot. >> How how do you think your ancestors have messed with you? ████ giving me ████ parents. >> [laughter] >> They did that before they died. I know. They planned it out, dude. >> [laughter] >> They planned it out. >> But do you think like your ghost ancestors are like out there uh I don't know, like moving your stuff so you don't know where you put it, making you slip? >> And then I'm just ████ oh, it's been in my ████ pocket the whole time.
9:24 Yeah, they do that ████ They do that ████ >> [snorts] >> Yeah. I'd be buying ████ leaving it in the ████ counter, forgetting where I put it. >> Do you think Do you think it was your ancestors that made you forget your passport? >> Mhm. >> [laughter] >> ████ dumb ass ancestors. He He was supposed to fly to UK. I left my passport in LA. What? >> And I was in Hawaii, and my friend flew it over to Hawaii for me. Oh my god. Hawaii to UK, but he left it in >> Forgot the Oh my goodness. Ancestors put the passport in LA. No, the thing is I was filming JK that week, and I was supposed to pick up my passport in LA the same week, and I forgot cuz of my ancestors ████ your ████ >> put a spell on me, and I went back to Hawaii. And then like a day before flying out, Hannah's like, "What's your passport look like?"
10:14 And I was like, "Oh my god." >> A day before? Yeah, so I couldn't even get it like mailed over. Oh my goodness. >> So, Hasegawa helped me grab it, give it to my other buddy Tommy, and Tommy was going to come to Hawaii the next week anyway, so I was just like, "I'll just buy a ticket, come tomorrow." Damn. And he's like, "Gotcha, bro." And I He flew in. >> Wow, dude, that's such a clutch save. >> Yeah. Or else I was going to have to fly to LA that night, grab my passport, fly and I would have like 3 hours to get to my place, grab a passport, drive back to the to catch my flight to get back to Hawaii to catch my flight to get to San Francisco Oh my god. Yeah. That would have been crazy. That would have cuz you know, I was thinking about it, right? It's an hour to get to the area, an hour to get back. So, that means I have 1
11:05 hour to handle it. >> Yeah, you got to count all the Uber time, traffic, all that ████ Maybe not made it to my flight. And Hannah's going with you, too. Oh, yeah. You know what would be the craziest thing? If your mom came back from one of her like fortune teller friends, and she goes, "Your dad haunted you and made you ████ where you were walking the dog. He made you ████ your pants behind the sign." >> [laughter] >> You remember that? Yeah, if my mom told me that? >> Yeah. Imagine how well you'd feel. >> I would be like, "Why? What did that teach me? What the hell?" >> You wouldn't be impressed that it was totally accurate? >> [laughter] >> Cuz she has no way of knowing that you did that. I wouldn't be impressed because some of the stuff that she's been told has been pretty accurate. >> Oh. But I'm like, "But what did that teach me?
11:56 What did it teach me to make me ████ behind Carmel Cliff?" >> [laughter] >> Cuz I was in cuz I was in the neighborhood. He was out running and he had to ████ So, you know, like some of these neighborhoods have like fancy little signs for the neighborhood. He He squatted behind that and just took a ████ >> You know Sky Vista? There's a street called Sky Vista. I I had Korean barbecue the night before, so imagine that mix. And in the morning I drank creatine. And the creatine and the Korean barbecue mixed together and I started running. I'm like, "Oh, ████ I need to ████ right now." And then I went to a neighborhood called Carmel Cliffs. That was the sign. I went behind the sign. I just pulled my shorts down and I just ████ just Chinesed it. Yeah. >> [laughter] >> Just mainland China'd it, you know? I heard this story. I'm going to butcher it cuz I'm going to memorize it cuz I memory I memorize it kind of weird. But
12:46 like the gist is this, right? This girl she just had she was at this bar and she was looking over to a guy she had this like compelling like desire to tell him this joke that she broke her leg. But she's like, "I don't know why. I just wanted to be like, yeah, my ████ leg's broken." And then she wanted to say that, right? She goes, "Hey, excuse me. I don't know why, but like I just I just got to tell you that I broke my leg. For some reason I just got to tell you that, right?" And then like the guy started ████ bawling. He was like, "What the f███?" And then she's like, "Did I say something wrong?" And then she thought it was just like funny cuz she always did goofy ████ Come to find out that his father and him had a pact that were like, "If heaven is real, okay, and one of us dies, when we come we're going to get we're going to try to get each other a
13:36 message." And what's the message? It's like, "I broke my leg." Woah. I don't know if that was a phrase that's that's something like that, right? Crazy. >> sent that message. So he was just like, "Oh my god, it ha- he's in heaven." You know? But he's just a random guy? Yeah, just a ran- she just had this intuitive desire to to say something to a stranger. She just wanted to be like, "My leg's broken." Or whatever. But that was the code between them two. I think you made it up. >> [laughter] >> Sounds like an AOL chain letter email. >> [laughter] >> No, but that could have been what happened with you, why you ████ >> Yeah, see? What is that I mean what is I didn't make a pact with my dad like, "Hey, if you pass ████ make me ████ somewhere." >> [laughter] >> But that because you didn't have a pact? That was the message. That was the
14:26 message When you don't make a pact, the default is that. Yeah. >> [laughter] >> What about the time where I had to ████ on the 15? What was that? That was also one of your answers. That was another answer to that.
// end of tape