0:05 Okay, this is a topic that I feel like is kind of heating up right now and it always comes around in different forms in the Asian community. Uh, but it's basically about AsianAmerican men on dating shows. It's kind of a thing where um a lot of people do believe that they're set up to fail in certain ways where um >> Are you talking about specifically that one dude that was like on what was it like? >> Yeah, we all saw blind. Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. What's his name? Patrick? I don't know. But um >> but I seen a lot of podcast. >> Yeah. >> What's the story behind him? >> But isn't he like part white or No. >> No. Okay. >> No, not him. No. >> Adopted though, right? He was adopted and he grew up in a white family or something. Well, like if in that season of Love is Blind, there's a you know, they don't see each other obviously and they fall in love and stuff and then she
0:55 I think at one point asks like what what uh race he is and he didn't want to say >> Yeah. >> Oh, he was ashamed >> or like what? >> He just was he's not ashamed. I think >> he didn't want to introduce a unknown variable that could jeopardize what they had. >> Gotcha. >> Yeah. >> Interesting. >> And then and then between them ultimately like it didn't work out. And then uh I don't it's not cuz he's it's some people do believe that's all that that there is to it. I personally don't. >> I didn't think so either. I thought they were just incompatible because she was like a sorority girl and he was like a math club guy. >> Like I didn't I didn't see him as the frat guy. Not Well, he wasn't that nerdy, but I would I just thought that like it's not the race thing. It's just different um kind of like one's a skater, one's a god. It doesn't really match. a bad move just when they ask what your race is, especially in that context of that show and you don't
1:45 reveal it. Do you feel like that? >> I think if you make a big deal out of it, when someone asks, then it becomes an issue. >> But by not saying that, does it make it a big deal? >> I think the way he did it made it a big deal. >> Yeah. Cuz it's like it's like why lie about that? Why why not disclose that? Did he not >> It revealed too much about how he felt about it. And I think I think I don't think most women would want you to be not confident. I feel like Asian dudes from what I see is like they're they already come into the and I think we all struggle with this in our own way or our own journey with it or whatever, but it's like like they just feel insecure about not being accepted because they're Asian. >> Yeah. I think that's a that's a worldwide thing. A lot of Asian lead with that. I think it's really >> Did you watch the full episode? Cuz I only watched clips. >> I've only seen like the whole like clip uh basically the compilation of everything up until the couch episode where they he she gives the ring back and all that stuff. I think the the
2:35 parts that I watched because it's clips I it's only based off my assumption. >> My assumption is he must have had some sort of trauma associating his ethnicity with love or whatever and that's why he was so hesitant, but I don't know if that's accurate. >> Yeah, >> I I bet that's true though. >> Or do you think it was like Joe said it's it's type difference? >> Um I think it was type difference in love at first. >> Yeah. Well, they had they had something going on, but I think eventually it was bound to happen cuz like for example, you could find someone attractive that isn't really your culture or type because they're just good-looking or whatever and you try, but there's a lot of things that just not compatible because like I don't know, it's like one's too preppy and one's too gothy or whatever, right? >> But do you think with the for with the
3:25 format of the show, isn't that the whole point? Like if it's love is blind, you don't see what each other looks like. Their goal is to let's get the souls to connect and then introduce the superficial, right? So, so it seemed like their souls connected, but then when they introduced the superficial, all of a sudden it doesn't work. >> But then that's why I think a lot of people are so diehard pro-A willing to look at how he's a different type than what she would want. You know what I mean? Like they're not willing to It's like you're looking at Asians as a monolith still and you're not seeing that like, hey, there's other types of Asian dudes. That's not the kind that she would have wanted. another Asian that would work with. >> Absolutely. Absolutely. I absolutely think >> with the whole uh Asians aren't seen as attractive. That's my biggest argument because when people think of Asian, they're thinking about the Chinese cook in a kitchen. They're not thinking about
4:16 >> the hot Asian actor thinking about that Asian. >> That's why like seriously because THINK ABOUT THINK ABOUT people that that grew up around non-Asians, right? >> Who do they interact with? It's who they see. Yeah. they the the the Chinese waiter at that one Chinese restaurant in their town. >> That's so when they think Asian guy, they're not thinking about like hot K-pop guys or >> or they might maybe there was one Asian nerd kid in their high school. That's who they're thinking about. Sometimes that is the ratio that's more common >> and they go uh well I know one Chinese guy is like I don't think they're attractive cuz she's thinking about one or two people and I think like Kevin so Kevin Crater you know that guy that was in uh Bling Empire >> so he had a really good comment um on the video that was like posted about it and then uh well he did like a podcast and in the podcast he was saying like do
5:06 you think that like um he had made a point about do you think the people that cast a show like if they had put a guy like like you or me he was talking to the host and they are different Asian guys than that Asian guy. Like they look like the more jockey Asian dude. And then people in the comments were like pissed off at him for like being like, "What do you mean like you and me?" Like they're not willing to see that there's a difference between him and him. I think that's a problem. I think >> that's a problem cuz if you think about all the Asian guys, they're like, "Oh, they don't like Asian guys." And I'm like, >> "Bro, you're like 400 lb. You look unhygienic. You don't dress well. Don't ████ put you and like Asian stuntmen and celebrities in the same category. You're not the same category. >> Cuz if you look at look at Kevin Crater, like that's a guy who dedicates obviously so much of his time to having a really fit body and like looking like a specific type, right? Like he's kind
5:56 of marketed that way. >> He's a model, right? >> And yeah, and it's like knowingly a thing that he's a model. >> The reveal and Love is Blind happened and they finally see each other and they see Kevin Creed. It's going to be a night and day difference between the other dude. I'm not saying that a dude doesn't deserve that. I'm saying that if you're like a woman and you expect a certain thing in your mind and you see something that you feel let down, that's just how it's going. >> What's the other dude's name again? >> Think Patrick. >> Cuz doesn't he seemed pretty manly to me? No. >> Let me see what this guy looks like. He's just a different type. >> I saw him I saw when they met like he seemed like masculine and even the way he hugged her, it felt I don't know. I didn't >> Yeah, he's not like a wimp, but I can see the difference. You know what I mean? >> This is a guy. Yeah, I'll put them I'll pull them up. >> I just thought that they don't look like a couple. >> Crazy, right? >> I saw I saw him like get sad and then
6:46 made me sad. >> Yeah, it is true. >> I was like, damn. Cuz I thought they really fell in love. >> I mean, he got to a point where they're kissing and like dating, right? >> Oh, man. >> Poor dude. >> But like, okay. >> Really ████ with your own head and the things you do in a relationship like that. And you could do you could definitely self-sabotage. And isn't didn't that chick also say like she doesn't date Asians or something? >> Yeah. >> So there was like no the Asian chick. >> Oh. >> So I think because of that I think that's why there's that whole controversy like are Asians set up to f like when they casted this specifically are they set up setting the Asians up to fail if you already casted an Asian chick that says she won't date Asians >> and then you have a Asian guy that like got rejected by a non-Asian. >> To start with though, this whole ████ show is set up for you to fail. Yeah, it's reality TV. They need They
7:36 need the controversy. >> They're just targeting Asians, though. Yeah. But people Yeah. >> for anyone to see Crash and Burn. It doesn't matter what race you are. They're trying to see >> Yeah. They can't have it be boring. >> Exactly. They want to see some crazy ████ So, it's also like to extrapolate real life from this too is a little >> They try to get everybody to >> Exactly. Look how happy these guys. >> But then also, I think Kevin Kevin brought up a point that I've always said too is that it's um there's the the the casting pool for Asian men for dating shows on TV. You're not going to get the top Asian guys cuz the top Asian guys don't go on TV on Asian on on like dating shows. They just not in this country. Maybe in Korea, maybe in in Japan, but in America, the top Asian guys are raised differently and they don't end up on these shows. They just don't, you know what I mean? They end up like >> You think why black is you could get the
8:28 top? >> No, I just think numbers wise just cuz like if you have like a hundred white guys, >> yeah, there's only five. >> Easy to pick like >> dope dudes that'll make it on TV. >> If you have like five Asian dudes, the the high performers are trying to get into Wall Street or whatever. Like, and you go, "Hey, you want to be on on TV?" I'm like, "F███ no. Why waste my time?" >> Like the military. >> So, I think it's just culturally different. like you just want attention. >> I remember there was one Asian dude that made the news when he was on the show and he was like creating this fake soba story and like he put like he made himself look like he was crying on the show and I was like that dude. >> Yeah, there you could tell like that guy's a sociopath. Like that's he's like the wrong choice. So out of like you said all out of all the Asian guys, you get the ████ crazy guy who's faking everything and then you just get a normal Asian dude. Like that's all you really get. The pool is really small. I
9:18 would say like that argument about we're being sabotaged and all that ████ um was probably true when we were growing up because we didn't have a counter >> Yeah. >> like representation, >> but now with everything in the media and like with Crazy Rich Asians, with us on YouTube, with >> it's not that era anymore where we're only looked upon as like foreign invaders and liquor store owners. It It's not in their algo though. >> Yeah, that's true. Yeah. >> Even though it's in some people's >> It's not in some people's algo, but some people's algo is all >> Well, like think about like, okay, >> K-pop K-pop. >> I would say we're better than before, but it's not an even playing field yet. >> No, there's still some work to do playing field look like to you guys because I actually think that it's also
10:10 the Asians fault for not applying enough. >> That's possible >> cuz there's I'm not saying the mechanism. I'm just saying like if we someone took a a like a a snapshot of what hap what's happening right now and you just looked at all the projects being made it I wouldn't say like we don't have our like Idris Alba or like you know we don't have we have one example >> I see >> white black Hispanic whatever multiple examples so we only have one kind of case study and then that's the only one that we can all refer to if once we have a body of work then I'm like okay cool it's an even playing field >> I actually think it makes women seem really ████ dumb. Like when they when you think that media is what's going to get you laid. Like Asian guys are complaining like we're not looked upon as attractive because of the media, right? But it's like you're also thinking that women are so ████
11:00 stupid that they need to watch movies and then go, you know what? I actually think they're hot now. >> It works though. >> I think it helps though. >> It helps. It might help. But >> I think there's a big part of psychology though. But if they find an attractive man, right, I think an adult woman would know their tastes and be like, "He's attractive. I wish he would come talk to me." >> I think what you're talking about is an individualistic uh journey. And that's for sure 100% correct. I think what the people are complaining about is the collective mindset. So in the collective mindset, like for example, even like one huge thing was like Shia above being in Transformers, they're like, "Oh ████ like we can't have a nerd be the lead." That's like a huge mind shift to have a successful movie and not have some hot like handsome guy be the lead. We can have a nerd that changes the collective mindset. I think in the collect what
11:50 people are are wishing for is the collective mindset of having a hot sexy Asian dude which we don't have yet. But individualistically, you know, in the actual statistics, yeah, you see a lot of like interracial relationships and people are having their own individual journeys and they're they just want people to go, I wish we can see that the individualistic journey reflective in the reflected in the collective is what I think the people are arguing for. >> Yeah. But I I don't think like when people look at this and they see it as like a sabotage where they're like, "Oh, that guy was doomed." It's it's you got to remember it's reality TV >> and as somebody that like I've been on multiple reality shows I can tell you they're just they want the most drama possible. If you're not giving them anything, you have no use on the show. >> Yeah. And then they just took the Asian insecurity angle with him. >> And look, we're talking about it. Everyone's >> It's probably not like he probably has
12:41 way more confidence than it looks like in real life, but then they're going to play up that angle of like, oh, this looks like a really cool thing. Otherwise, they wouldn't have broadcasted it. They wouldn't have used it. I did see a clip of him saying like that was like not even 10% of what they did. They talked about so much other ████ There was so much to the show, but they they took that and they magnified it. >> They're aware these producers are smart. They've done how many of these things and they know that like that's something that people are going to resonate with whether it's negative or positive. They know that the audience will be captured and it's it's a narrative that they ran with all the way to the end. Like it totally makes sense. But then I I think you're right about like if you're an Asian guy that feels like you're being shafted in your real life, this has no effect on you. Like you might be the problem in your own thing. >> Use this as an example. See, I ████ knew it. But it's like, dude, that's they have their own agenda. >> Yeah. It's like, no, that doesn't mean
13:31 that like women like this are not rejecting you because of seeing that >> like that you just might not be on that. And you have to understand too, like, you know, if if you're a niche taste, like you kind of have to accept that too. You know, like I expected a long time ago that I'm like, "Okay, I'm not the conventionally attractive person that all the women are going to like." There's a specific type of person that will like me and that's kind of what you got to zone in on. You can't be like mad about. >> But what's really nice about that is that they love you. They love you. >> Yeah. >> You know what I mean? >> Yeah. >> That's true. >> They love you for who you really are. >> Yeah. >> And that's what's important. The casting pool thing that Kevin Creger said made a lot of sense to me. I understand that like the line if you looked at the line of 30 all Asian guys and 30 all white or black guys, it's going to be a totally different thing. >> For some reason, it's not >> wholeheartedly because when we started
14:21 trying to get into like media more, Hollywood more, we saw and we went to like um like acting schools and we were meeting other Asians, the biggest thing is like, "Oh, they never make us look masculine." And I'm like, "That's cuz you're gay." Like, like, nailed it. >> I'm like, the talent here, y'all are pretty gay. When we would go to Bali's Total Fitness and you saw these like masculine ████ Asian dudes working out, they're like your stereotypical cowboy ass guys. They're not doing theater cuz they are like, "That's gay, bro." theater guys who are actually feminine are trying to play a masculine role. They grew up like sheltered, all this ████ They want to be a badass. And it's like, why aren't you looking at me as a alpha male? And I'm like, cuz you're
15:11 not. Theater guys in general aren't. They're not in theater. They are. >> Yeah. When I the last episode of or the uh last season of Bachelorette I watched, there was like one Asian dude that was competing for the girl and he was the first guy to cry at like the third episode and I was JUST LIKE, "GOD DAMN IT, MAN." >> That's for sure going on TV if you cry. >> Oh, for sure. >> You're going to be on TV. >> Like to have an emotional like like uh outpour and stuff. It was just like he didn't win obviously, but then >> on episode three, you already crying >> to work that hard to make you look affeminite. They they don't have to because the pool of guys are. >> But then the question is, I think a lot of people are imagining that the show saw 30 Asian guys that were all eligible and they picked the weakest ones. I
16:02 THINK THAT'S WHAT THEY THINK is happening. >> That's never the case. >> That's not happening. Like you try to search up the top earner like hot Asian male dudes and most likely they're married already. >> They're not doing this ████ >> It's just so easy to blame a TV show. >> Yeah. >> Reality TV. >> Yeah. >> Have an agenda against us. >> It's way easier to say that than to take personal. >> You also are blinded to the fact that like maybe there were other white guys that looked even stupider and you just don't notice it cuz you're used to seeing that too. You know what I you're just searching for. >> You need to get all the guys from like physical 100 and then throw them in there, you know? Doesn't it won't impact the white community either because they're also used to that too. But if you only have one representative for Asians that's on a thing, you'll be like, "A man, this ████ guy." You know what I mean? >> This guy is representing. >> Yeah, I get it. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. But I think there's a lot more
16:52 nuance, too. I think people are still like responding with the monolith thing again and being like, "That guy's no different than this guy or Daniel Day Kim. They're like the same guy." No, they're not the ████ same guy, dude. Like, come on. Give Give credit to some of these other Asian dudes, too, for like shaping their place. >> The guy that showed his butthole on YouTube. >> Oh my ████ god. >> Yeah, that's my favorite Asian guy. >> Finally got TAKEN DOWN AFTER LIKE >> HUNDRED something million views. >> That's my favorite. you are comfortable with who you are, you can enjoy like the William Hungs and stuff like that. That's what I realized >> cuz you don't attach yourself for worth to someone else. >> It has nothing to do with me. But then like the people that are like you're perpetuating the Asian uh image of being like
17:42 unwant or like kind of dumb and whatever. I'm just like, wait, that's like my ████ nephew. Like I love that guy. He's he makes me laugh, right? >> Yeah. I like if you're truly like all for all Asians, you should like everybody and be able to be like, "Yeah, this is the family. Like, it's cool. Like, we're going to have a ████ Down syndrome uncle. We're going to have this. We're, you know," and then we just laugh at it all. But then >> when I hear from this group of guys that always want to be on like our best behavior, to have this image for white America, and to to to be like, oh, looked upon as not as like goofy. I'm just like, why are you doing that? Like, I I don't I don't get it. Like, why are you want Why do you want to distance yourself from like I I don't want to be like I don't want those Asians to represent me. Like, I only want like the pristine
18:32 ones. And it's like >> Well, maybe all of them though. >> Maybe I think cuz you >> I'm down with all. >> Yeah. Yeah. But then like the the way that the when I hear this argument, right, it's us it's to me, well, for one, they don't value Asian women at all. It's always white women that they want to be like super loved by, right? They put white women on a pedestal. And then when they talk about, oh, like non-Asian girls don't like us, they're not talking about black girls. They're not talking about Latinos. >> Yeah. Talking about white women. So that's one. >> Yeah. Another thing is that they're always um like blaming other people for the reason why they're not getting any puss. So they're blaming like, "Oh, William Hung set us back. That's why I'm not getting any dates." And I'm like, "Why are you I love William Hung. >> Tough place to stand, bro. That was so
19:23 long ago. We're the only ones that talk about William Hung. >> But don't you don't you love him?" >> I do love him. I never blame him for >> But but but the the that type of Asian, you know what I mean? But hole Asian stat is forward though. >> Yeah. >> And then they quote that ████ ████ Oxford study ████ >> Oxford study. You guys know about Oxford study? >> No. What is that? >> It's this bogus ass like dating thing that they did and then they they say like Asian guys are the least um responded to and black women are the least responded to. >> Oh, right. Yeah. On dating apps. >> On dating apps. Yeah. >> Yeah. And then it says shows like Asian women, everybody wants them. Yeah. you know, and I mean, they're like highly sought after in porn, but like I don't know like that they they they quote that as a reason why like we're not we don't
20:13 you know, Asian guys can't get get a girlfriend. But if you do you think that um they want some Asian guys want white women to find them attractive too just because uh you guys were talking about how it's not even it's like um you you want because there isn't like a hot Asian successful that is like on in media you want all the to be represented but they want the white because that is the the the benchmark of like okay >> they don't on us. >> Yeah. Like >> they just need to go to Europe cuz those girls like Asian guys. >> Yeah. But in America though in America >> I don't know. >> I don't know. Yeah. I don't I I have no idea. Like but they do put them on a pedestal >> like and then I don't know. It's >> take white ladies off the pedestal,
21:03 fellas. >> Take them off. >> The weird thing is they're that means they're asking for feticization >> cuz they're being like, "No, you should like us cuz that cuz BTS." >> Yeah. It's ████ weird, bro.
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