0:00 thank you [Music] I try to pit pull articles that remind me of you guys this one I pulled because of one Nick done yeah none so the Jews are at it again by the way it smells like farts in here dude for reals on which side this guy this guy before the video starts and it's like it was rolling he goes I'm Gonna Go Far outside I did and right when you left I look at Steve when I go five bucks says he brings it back in I said you trailed it you made a Trail of Tears he was outside for like five seconds dude I farted and I even dusted my pants off and then I came in you dusted your pants yeah I smell like mervins dude you could withhold we could ████ deal with this fart that's a good line you could smell it it's okay it's not that bad it could
0:51 have been worse yeah like walk along the length of Joe's truck or whatever like 30 seconds the minimum bro ████ guy goes right outside the door and ████ keeps his butt against the crack do us a favor fart into the catalytic converter dude turn the car engine on and then fart in the tailpipe Jesus Christ you just let it backfire yo we got a ████ air filter now take that outside far into it far into the air filter air filter just dies and then we'll just go although thank you for farting outside at least trying to yeah thank you because old Bart you just let them rip and then he told us the story earlier about how he put his finger in his butt and it was like a rotten poop in there and then you sound like a fossilized dinosaur and it stays in like a tumor as long as you ████ it just kind of moves around right Jeff what were you saying about the jam oh yeah so San Francisco a
1:42 San Francisco bicyclist or cyclist sounds like Nick's gonna love this through a tantrum after her ride was seemingly interrupted by an ambulance parked in a bike lane good see that's harmless it doesn't hurt anybody except for her feelings and that makes me happy she threw a tantrum she really was flipping out right so she people Gotta Die on my watch ambulance take to her phone all right oh no and she's like here's an ambulance in the bike lane there's a business they can park in they can block the car Lane they can block the non-existent motorcycle Park Lane I'm not even half a mile away from home on a rainy day what the ████ what the ████ that's what she said I hope she's I hope she her bike rolls in some human poop I hope she drowns that storm that's coming yeah big old storm
2:32 this is a big storm coming to Cali huh yeah I hope it's drowns in it are you still drowning well there's another storm yeah just drive around that thing why you gotta complain so much God damn yeah why you gotta take out your your video camera and start filming they got more important job than you do you ████ recreational ladies yeah so guess what it gets better is she wearing the whole ████ outfit too she went off she's wearing oh it gets so Dynamic helmet with a big ass yeah it gets Mothership tail and moose knuckles but that's okay stuff this run anyway this block yeah yeah um no so she goes up to the ambulance and addresses the driver the paramedic driver what's he saying get
3:22 get of the bike lane you're killing us get out of the bike I'm not kidding healing us look at that really interesting choice of words to a paramedic dude I swear to God I'm not trolling I'm not being a second I'm not trolling I'm not his sidekick take out the ████ defibrillator and ████ zapper ass oh my god dude these so that's why dude I don't have to improv with this one because bicyclists are such ████ yeah they are you know this I always count on them to be the biggest ████ how did it happen though entitled people on the road because look I I think I have a theory when you're riding a bike I understand it's like it's like a US versus them thing so for us meaning the cyclists versus the cars right yeah so no matter what that's already weird though you should be like how do I fit in with these exactly I think that's the right mentality but I think when you're
4:12 riding a bike sometimes you ████ freak out because you're really close to cars and you might get hit so you're just on edge that lizard brain is just firing right so I think that's the reason why they lash out but it's stupid just drive a car just drive a car dude or if you're gonna ride in a motorcycle if you're if you're afraid to get hit by other cars you need to find a way better place where you stay on the ████ sidewalk then yeah but even then they can't even do that yo this happened to me at a bike park dude I ████ wiped out and then I wiped out so ████ hard and you're not supposed to be you know obviously in the lane so I'm getting up moving my bike and his dumb ass ████ passes Me by and goes you're not supposed to stop no ████ ████ oh well let me control how I wipe out you dumb ████ I'm so sorry I bet she's saying that as she's zipping past you she's
5:03 zooming past she's she's not stopping she's zooming past me and she's like oh you're not supposed to stop and it's like well duh you think I want to ████ be in the middle of the bike lane like I ████ wiped out I just picked up my bike what do you think I'm doing just ████ walking around pushing my bike on a bike lane she does ████ idiot dude sometimes when I'm driving and there's like uh I'm in the car with my wife and there's some cyclists this happened the other day it was like on a Sunday and it was two cyclists were blocking this road they're driving in the middle of the ████ road and it's like a really wide Road right but it's single Lane so I can't go around I don't like do I go around them what do I do and they're just ████ Cruising dude they're taking their ████ sweet time and I made a joke to my wife and I was like sometimes I just wish I could have like a long stick and just throw it right in front of them and they ████ shoot over the top and me
5:54 imagining that was so like cathartic for me and I was like oh man this is probably my way to battle them without having to say anything just a picture the art of fighting without fighting exactly or just a little love tap yeah you know what we need to install it give me strength oh my God I hate I hate to install like a flagpole that comes out with a button when you see a bicyclist and it goes and it goes into their ████ tire yeah yeah especially with it being jerks a video that almost made me come there's a bus driving big bus driving there's a lady who like opens her car door as a bicyclist goes by the bicyclist gets flung underneath the bus oh my God but he doesn't die so I didn't come
6:44 jeez he actually gets out from underneath it like in time because the the guy the driver stopped in time a bicyclist would never have stopped by the way just saying they would put out their phones ████ ████ dude the funniest when those types of things happen to the cyclists who are filming themselves with a 360 cam on a stick yeah oh my God and they just eat ████ yeah they fly oh I can't stand those guys man because they're just such ████ ████ if they weren't so entitlements if they weren't so ████ rude it wouldn't be a problem if they didn't have that I own this road mentality it was more like how do we share it together yeah it's because I ride a moped and I know it's hard to see yeah because I'm in a little and it's slow as ████ right and I know I'm causing ████ traffic but I'm riding
7:34 extremely defensively yeah because I'm not riding around like you see me I'm riding around like hey you see me right all right cool like they're not gonna crash into me right cool and then like I just get the ████ away from major places that are dangerous yeah that's that's the thing though to be fair they're motorcyclists are sort of the same way sometimes yeah sort of a little different but they at least they at least get the privilege especially in California of like you know riding in between yeah so they can still like one accelerate quickly even if they like get in front of you and you're annoyed they can ████ Zoom yeah versus like they're in front of you and you're like oh maybe until the next ████ stoplight to hopefully pass them the cool thing is that most of them just kind of will keep going even if they run into something like even if I it happens to me I just keep going whatever that guy messed up he almost hit me cool keep going but bicyclists will stop and like
8:24 give you a whole like lecture it's like but that's the thing with motorcyclists right like if you just give them a little love if they're like on your ass and you just move over a little bit and let them pass yeah they bro they show up they show love yeah they ████ dip out and it's all good but for cyclists I think it's the defensive driving you were supposed to do that it's like you're supposed to look out for me but then they're in the middle of the ████ bike lane or they're like hugging the lane where it's like in your car you don't know how close you are to them so they're like ████ you I think anybody who's like on like little ████ two-wheeler thing like that that has no engine like you gotta ████ realize that even in California somebody might pull out a gun and just shoot you yeah you know what I mean you can't be ████ going against machines this video is a ████ oh this one yeah exactly this happened in this one oh my what the ████ dude me and Anthony
9:14 are kind of simpatico right now it's pretty perfect setup that was wild yeah dude and he's recording himself doing it yeah I need to upload it this type is dumb dude but that's why right now as I drive I just try I've been really trying just just to not give any reactions to anything like because I know like yeah people are crazy it's so tough and then I think I've been getting really good at getting better at it but I just I just give no reactions I don't like to start confrontation if I'm not willing to finish confrontation so like I mean Nick is probably the one that can actually finish confrontation enough there's a guns in my face or a knife or yeah well if you're in a ████ motorized vehicle and they're on a two-wheeler bike like you could deal with the car drive so I learned this watching Steven Seagal Lawman here hold it hold on yeah
10:04 you shot yourself well he made me pull the trigger that's how Steven Seagal is teaching law enforcement ████ made me laugh so ████ hard I couldn't breathe dude it's so good he just yeah he just Maneuvers them and then they're all like whoa it's kind of cool oh yeah it's like ████ oh yeah and he's like see how I'm doing this it's so easy and ████ and then like everyone's like dude you're just some fat guy dude yeah you're a fat guy that means six six is he really sick so he's like six five it's gonna be a lot of weight right 250 bro for sure 250. dude I think it might even be three oh yeah he's three three so he's like three twenty five six six eight you're that big like come on that's pretty because think about Undertaker dude that guy's like 330
10:55 pounds is he but he's like six ████ seven but he wears a lot black all the time so it's real slimming yeah oh yeah he's like in shape or you can ████ move around your car and he always starts off laying down with the lights off [Music]
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