0:00 [Music] and if you haven't noticed everybody we've got indian food today which means we have a very special guest thank you as you can see i always travel with a plate of 10 it's on your writer it's this form of id it's like got blue m m's it's like santa claus but the indian version and he has a lot of tandoori chickens he's just getting santa's clothes claws everybody welcome back to another but we like to keep it extremely careful um so i hear something somewhere about a doll that was made of you a sexy doll do you have your own doll dude yeah no no no uh i did a cool little project with uh an incredible artist uh tanya
0:52 oh sorry once you said the name the joke was out yeah i know we had to get real on here for a second uh she photoshopped me into a ken doll you guys can see on buzzfeed is it life-size because once it's life-sized you know what's up maybe if you pay enough money maybe you'll get a lesson i'm gonna sit on that doll's face like the dog could experience pleasure yeah we'll see that's just like the marketing tagline sit on my face yeah yeah you could just hang out with me i got the real one who needs a ████ doll dude you got the first edition right here you could already do that at jiu jitsu together i know dude what was the process like of getting him into a doll uh so she it was more it was all photoshopped but yeah we did green screen photo shoot uh had a stylist make a part of the whole team yeah uh and it was a lot of you
1:43 know we're gonna hit these poses and do these things with the joints and then she went in and she went and uh photoshopped it so did are they making a doll out of that like a prototype i don't think so but we could talk just made a real list we could talk to mattel and make it happen maybe they'll sell mattel's make some sell some dolls make that happen you just need to create another company called patel and then it's the indian barbie sponsored by athletic greens can i see a picture of the dog can we see a picture yeah is it googleable yeah yeah it is what is it sex dolls just type in ritesh ritesh sex doll kendall kendall buzzfeed there it is really wanted to be here
2:34 he really he just wants to have something yeah joe yeah get in line but it's really it's really cool looking work man this is it right here ladies there's just a there's a better one oh there's a better one okay for just go to the website you're a good pr guy for yourself uh just go to the website go to the website i'm going to show them how to use a computer compared to margot robbie what is this this is the article oh he's like i haven't read an article in years i just stare at pictures is that you why are you so that's real life you look so ████ in this photo that's from russian doll okay this is the one okay they made a russian doll no the tv show he's on his show oh that's right you'll see the ones with like the joints and my neck that'll be a funny rotten russian doll where you just keep it you're like more retention he's like in a pinball shape are you
3:24 playing golf yeah this is like an ode to the classic ken that's tight 1950s 1960s um yeah it's pretty cool that's some of the other photos you can see the the joint locks and my head and all that stuff i remember for like school projects back in elementary school i remember love i'd love making clouds like that ████ taking cotton balls here we go this is cute as ████ i saw that one yeah i take him to prom am i right yeah come on baby so it was a great great project um tanya did an incredible job she's an amazing artist uh she's inspired a lot by pop culture and isn't she like some kind of crazy engineer or some ████ she was she used to work for nasa no
4:15 yeah yeah and then she kind of did a career switch much smarter than to do photoshop she was like yes when you could do this am i right she uh she did a residency uh through adobe so this was her final project her capsule project yeah i like that one yeah so we got a little foot rest popcorn's on the floor though i don't know how i feel about popcorn on the floor well these got to fill the negative space [Laughter] never heard of golden ratio idiot he's resting dude and it's like i'm probably watching your show on the tv action figure i just thought we we come on to the show to like have opinions as steve says this is what happens when a dancer hosts a show man he doesn't like popcorn on the floor because it might ████ up his floor glides too much butter floor glides i'm just saying how many guys were popping on the floor they should make
5:05 that into a video game the kendall can and yeah kendama dodgy popcorn if i could create a video game i think it would be like a uh like because we were talking about yakuza or like gta right but you have you ever played a hentai game it's like choose your own destiny absolutely you got to try to ████ them right and i think that's what we got to do you guys are giving me ████ for popcorn on the floor just gotta ask you if you haven't played a hentai game for all the games we grew up want to remember that i just i just it's a segway you played a hentai game before oh yeah not in the late night so what was the storyline that's the first question was it pc or was it like was it a rated g bird game or no it was like absolutely not rated sex but it's like i'm a new student at this new school oh man there's so many hot girls and then it's like you just try to ask a
5:55 girl on a date is that wolfenstein like sideways no it's like it's like graphic jean kimono while you were playing this game i just noticed what you were wearing like i had is it when you call it isn't it it was similar to this but like one arm was tucked in like that so you could just be ready to go and my pants were around my ankles and then my mouse was i got really good at jacking off with my left hand because i'll do it like this dang wow so let's play this inside game we should do a react video should we do a group collection it's basically you choose your own destiny right so then they'll give you a multiple choice they'll ask you a question and then you can choose how to respond to her and then it's an interactive game where you always you were always a gentleman i would imagine see if you're too nice then it goes bad and you gotta start from the beginning
6:47 yeah you're like oh you come on too fast too hard they're like ah too horny i don't want you i don't want to talk to you so there's there's an optimal approach so it teaches you games and it teaches you seduction i think kids need this decent i think we should bring this game back kids is a strong word but yes there's nothing enough there's too many i think kindergarteners need this i forgot the name of it but there's like once you get like ready and flirty right um there there's an outline of her and then you gotta choose what to what order do you kiss first do you touch the boo first do you do whatever right but horny boys they would like go straight and try to like ████ touch her ████ or something and go burn she puts her clothes back on and then like you gotta start from the beginning wow you have to go and like maybe you got to be romantic all the time you spent wasting playing this game yeah now you gotta go back to the multiplayer beat it in one try nah dude it was hard
7:39 you know but then looking online to find all the answers in order there were hard ones like that there was one there was one uh called paradise heights and it's like you you're this new guy in an apartment complex where every unit has a different hot girl and the the objective paradise baby and the game is like it's like a narrative that lasts like i don't know months and you're basically trying to get every girl without them knowing that you're trying to get the other one this is the hey thing about this thing about this that there's someone out there who was like i'm going to design this game and not only will people play it it's going to do really ████ well like you know you're like this is a great idea if i feel like i pitched a video game like this to anyone they'd be like this is a harvest when i was 17 that's like that was everyone's fantasy you know i mean in your mind you're like oh i could be that guy just get caught in an apartment building yeah yeah yeah
8:30 when you're ████ 16 years old eligible bachelors and bachelorettes this is uh that was your dream this is apparently a scene or one of the screenshots from paradise i just no way yeah that's it that's the that's the weird ass 90s pc graphics man what's in his balls actually no i didn't even realize that was a purge in kettlebell kettlebell no he has an erection and his it's going through the fly of his pants but he has underwear no it's not blurred out well no look at the it's the boxers dude looking at it like it's a ████ delicious corn dog that she's about to develop so big in that because you've never seen one that's before
9:20 notice the gentle hand placement on top of that i think she's really admiring probably like the cotton thread count oh like her eyes he's like a seamstress also there's no button on his fly very interesting hat it's obviously a late stage of the game by that scene because that's does it is it just still the same format where it's multiple choices no one made fun of this game there must be like made fun this is art it's such an underground like weird niche thing like called summer heights high what was going on these are like late 90s hentai you had to download it from kazaa wow not even limelight i got the i used to source that on aol like i used to when so your computer was riddled with viruses is what you're telling us yeah hold on no one told me about these games does it get significantly more mature or is it oh it does it just becomes porn but it's pixelated dude did you guys learn
10:12 anything by the end of your experience seriously did you learn one positive thing was there a carryover and this is the evil thing you learned because every single girl they go to such lengths of making them so different personality-wise they're all different archetypes and tropes of women that you learn what these women would rather hear so your options are always different you're never saying the same thing to each girl you're saying things catered to what our hobbies are with the nerds yeah like so really good training so i think it's taught you guys to be better listeners or at least to you know because you had to pay attention to each of these individuals some people might say that you're giving them a lot of credit i am not one of those i'm i'm just trying to save their career it teaches you it teaches you late 90s womanizing i think kids need this man that's what i'm saying did you let tyka play this game yeah so he's going to
11:02 turn into an incel yeah yeah not now he's too young to make sure he got game that's why i said kids was a strong word he's like when he's like yeah yeah that's a good yeah i think i played it in junior high i was in junior high when i i was like 12 when i played that game whenever i discovered jacking off see when i was 12 i was playing probably like diddy kong racing that is not even mario kart you're an intel dude you were probably picking the hovercraft too here i am speaking of games didn't you just win an award for one yeah he set that up wow that was good uh yes tribeca had their festival a couple weeks ago we won best video game it might i think this is the first time ever i don't know you guys on the internet uh it's called thirsty suitors outer loop games also downloadable on kazan
11:52 [Laughter] unopported interactive uh it's a great game features a south asian family it's about a female protagonist who has to go back and um kind of right the wrongs in her previous relationship which one are you so i play a villain sergio i was in the door you're the guy with a white sleeveless jacket guys are at home looking up thirsty suitors is this you yo that guy looks like bart dude to the right that you got purple hair guys trailer is out everyone check it out when it drops no release date yet but shout out to our team there's a bard in there i think you guys will really dig it because it's it's once again really quirky and off the walls and uh deals with uh south asian culture and you see a penis coming through denim
12:42 jeans but it's pretty good football bar as long as it doesn't deal with mental health it's pretty good it's pretty good bless you where can we play this on uh my understanding it'll be out on all the concerts wait what is it what do they is they play football it's an rpg what do you guys play soccer in this game it's like madden except without this class this guy heard nerf football goes right in line with your your game that you were playing thirsty suitors this is like the you know you're a thirsty suitor that's amazing in fact you guys we all could be these characters in real life okay who's so obviously bart is that guy is there fighting yeah i like fighting yes it looks dope actually let me try
13:32 and put two together if it works like this um so you were saying uh tribeca films dropped the films because now they do uh gaming and stuff like that yeah was all the stuff you're doing with ken is that under tribeca no the ken stuff was just a independent project okay so uh so this was for like the other movies that you were a part of um tribeca so tribeca what we what i went for was for this specific game thursday oh okay okay so this is like a separate thing that you just happened to just a separate project a man does robert de niro show up at tribeca in this exact outfit with your hentai game and you ask him to sign it on your gameboy or whatever you play i gotta get my film glasses on yeah all right let's do it wow dude you look like a character from yakuza like a dragon oh thank you yeah you can go a lot like
14:23 straight up either he like made a genocide elite like straight up ████ thing how about that even more dude no for real you look like yakuza you like you've equipped every possible yeah is it yakuza or is it yakuza it's yakuza yakuza it's yakuza you can't say it you can't say it without yelling again yakuza or [Laughter] so we should all just speak in our native accents or heritage accents nobody though that's yours so how did you get involved in this game are you auditioned and they were you know gracious enough to cast me and i was lucky enough to be in it and
15:13 that's cool i didn't know like i went in it was a fun little thing did you help develop it too no no no no i just came in as an actor had no idea what it was about it's really kind of goofy and off the wall um i love it so i highly recommend everyone check it out so when did robert de niro give you the the trophy he's gonna show up later today i told him to meet me out here i mean how are you gonna have a film festival and you don't even attend you know what i mean like that's kind of weird to me that's his film probably he probably doesn't care i don't know probably doesn't care if i had a film festival i'd be like there every single time you should start one star one post what if you did it like 20 years in a row these things still keep going like what it's once a year right so it's only 20 times you go i think you should start an award show for your favorite hentai material
16:04 [Laughter] we're on to something video games comic books anime why don't i do a a top joe's top 10 picks of porno of the week i mean you already looked the part make it into a top five yeah and then you'd really deep dive and you already live with all of the kind of like the world judging you like you already do that so you might as well you know double jeopardy and i think to open it up you need to have the categories and then you have an overall winner like you know so you have lesbian gay straight objects you know so you have the category winners and then you have an overall they're like yo you hear joe's new top five this month it's so good i'm gonna have this most of the radius professional you gotta be careful once you expand past hentai people like this is not authentic anymore really you got too real yeah it got too real oh yeah do you have a dream game that you'd like to
16:55 voice on or like a franchise like paradise heights besides gta i think you'd be a good gta vice city voice i mean i think being part of a franchise would be really cool just any franchise like anything furious sorry you said games yeah games i'm surprised they didn't even make that a game yet they did but they suck they're for kids it's hard to do the movies into the game it's like they're like kids games but you know i love halo i love gears of war i love metal gear solid that would be fun metal gear solid because i want to do a game where you talk a lot well because melody charlotte's good because you have to actually act yeah don't they just final fantasy but the thing is final fantasy like i don't know maybe most people play in japanese i think we should create the game that we're talking about earlier indian jones where he goes into the british indiana jones india jones i steal back all the indians all the
17:45 indian artifacts they steal it revenge yeah from the temple of doom what is that what's the actual jewel you said i don't know there's some there's some jewels somewhere in probably london most valuable jewel like the biggest jewel i i don't know if it's a ruby or sapphire and it's originally an indian treasure yeah and it's probably sitting in some british museum chilling let's start a heist yeah let's do a heist crew this is what our heists move should we just steal all the asian artifacts and bring them back to the wrong asian countries we don't even this is for you this is chinese we're japanese who had the shiva was it you who let this send that back where's this ganesh go ████ we're in indonesia ganesha's at a cambodian thing here you go what if you show up and it's like you know how those different empires right so it was like a different dynasty and they're like not even the same chinese that was rolling so they're like that
18:35 ain't us like what the ████ who do i get though we can sell this on the market for a lot of money and we bring it to pawn stars to see how much oh yeah that was the premise of our heist movie remember yeah steel they got it they got a crown stars you just have the worst fence i got an indian jewel guy yeah yeah the best thieves with the worst fence what if we just set them up what if we there's only like we bring such specific material to the pawn stars guys that there's only one expert and we're all in on it together and they're like really this is priceless but if i had to put a price on this 100 billion dollars and then he'll be like well i can only sell it for a billion because or i can only buy it for a billion because i need them i'll give you a good deal i still need to make money at the end of the day oh you're twisting my arm here okay [Music]
19:39 you
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