0:02 oh now I'm horning what a weird order of [Music] operations all right so try not to laugh I know you guys are a bunch of children you guys are probably to laugh about this hey let's sit up straight and not laugh about something for once I'm an adult not me a woman's nut allergy was triggered after sex come on hell yeah she got nutted on her face oh come on did she get nut on her face here we go she got nut on her face the guy was eating a ton of nuts that she was making love to that's exactly what happened what did he do did heing eat a Payday before they he started eating her out he ate a he ate two paydays hey hey have you guys ever had the the the sweet and spicy nuts from uh from Cher Joe's no dud sweet and spicy nuts I'll go through have you ever had cash are you talking
0:53 about like bar mix they have they have like a Savory ones they have sweet ones they a holiday one let's talk about our favorite nuts punch but I'll say this once you start eating it once you start eating a couple nuts dude keeps going you can't resist nuts cashews are cashews are my favorite hey don't say that don't say how much how much are they how much are they like 329 cool all right go ahead they like 850 huh so the patient this woman was admitted to the hospital right in Brazil Brazil Brazil mentioned football football bra you're going to bra she had had unprotected vaginal ho-ha with Brazil nuts are fire they're strong good for her man they're really good wait you censored sex but you said
1:43 vaginal yeah I'm trying to clean it up for everybody okay all right he said kuha thank you that's kind of dirty in itself okay shortly afterward her vulva and her CLP started itching and swelling good I like he's using the scientific terms if we get flagged for this sh that's messed up YouTube don't do that to us YouTube clits the scientific term clitoris clitoris oh thank you thank you little fact check she Deval Canal angoda nailed it swelling of the tissue below the surface of the skin and Hive started appearing across her body she's just too horny she also felt faint and short of breath as she should it wasn't from the sex though it was from getting eat out it was from getting eat out and then he had peanut particles in his teeth good shot so so she said that her partner three two to three hours before sex he was eating he was just going ham on a on
2:34 a ttin of nuts tell you dude I'm telling you Ham on it says Ham on a ttin of nuts once you open the tin you can't you can't did he recently go to a sh Pao Trader Joe's is that what it says it it does say that yeah Brazil nuts are a big expor she said he was going so h on that t of nuts that he was even he was even knocking the dust into hisou yeah peanut brittle all over his shirt if you eat honey roasted nuts that's what Fu honey roast oh so that one gets a reaction but my sweet holiday nuts don't get a re CU we haven't tried not as cool not as cool when I was a kid my dad always had planter honey roasted nuts plan honey roasted nuts are unbelievable I could not stop my grandpa used to have a his like his recliner chair you could flip up the sides and it would have these deep Deep Pockets where he'd out all just nuts and like old guy snacks and a remote control be jerky hey
3:24 but the first time you had barbecue sunflower seeds though oh those are good too those are good those are good anything's better than what Nick mentioned never that was whack but you know what the the game changer for me corn nuts oh really I never got into corn nuts were were really fun yeah and they sold them at school in zip Ziplock bags and ████ let's just keep loosing things that bury whatever Nick said once you have one friend once you have one friend who like Corn Nut breathes in your face too much you're you're over true the pante cornnuts those are the best ones oh man that happened to be with Cool Ranch Doritos for a long Cool Ranch Doritos is Cool Ranch cornnuts they did that too they did yeah now my buddy BJ when I was a kid his name was BJ actually L he we used to play Sega Genesis at his house and he would eat so many co co Doritos that it made me sick
4:14 of him I used to go in the bathroom and almost throw up cuz like it was and then his uh his controller always probably was greasy with Doritos always Sal bir ████ fire dude ████ fire dude have you had the rolled ones now where they got the chili lime rolled ones oh my like a Tak change everything we'll get at 7 did you guys ever have this one snack it came in like a blue cylinder and it's just said cheese balls yeah yeah of course it's like gone now what was that no it's like a better what Nick said it's like a big one right and then it's like Puffs yeah they don't do them you can get them at like small drug stores like CVS and uh it's still around you can get them over there that was I just like I feel like it disappeared no they're they're out there Ryan I'm sure they just caused death all right so this guy's dust he's he's knocking off the dust right in his mouth then he's like
5:06 you know what I'm feeling kind of horny now right he just finished playing video games and so he he took a bath and thoroughly cleaned his teeth and fingernails cuz he knew his his ████ was allergic to nuts but the residue ████ her up it was just enough did he clean out of the fingernails dude peanut allergies are crazy you know why he ████ up why cuz he was doing and then he just touched his dick and he's like oh ████ I'm kind of horny now so then he washed his face and hands and he's like all right I'm ready to ████ but the residue was on his dick oh now I'm horning what a weird order of operation I almost did kill my friend in fifth grade um cuz we were at uh Dairy Queen the one in SOS you know oh the one on the on the other side of the mall I
5:56 don't know if it's still there but there was a Dairy Queen there on south of Gridley on the other side we're south going that way forgot okay where the BJs is now on that side oh okay not the one by Chick-fil-A no 183 and then yeah 183rd and then I uh we went to Dairy Queen his mom took us and I got Reese's peanut butter cups into the blizzard and then he told I was oh you should try them it's so good and he told me he was allergic to peanuts and I thought it was the funniest thing I ever heard oh no so I was like no you got to try it and then he starts running away from me and then we're were in the parking lot and I remember running in a circle chasing after him with it going and I was dying laughing but I think he and then I was it was so funny to me how scared he was that I didn't believe it until his mom came out I think she was in the bathroom or something she stopped it she was like no he really can't eat it like his uh his like um wind pipe will swell up and
6:48 he just can't breathe and I'm like oh ████ this is real like come on be a baby come on eat it and then when I got older and I realized what peanut allergies does to people I'm like oh ████ wa if I cornered him and I had eat my blizzard I could have killed him stop hanging out with though dude even cats who like are flying on planes or whatever they got to worry about people eating peanuts around them so it's it's the peanut people that ruined our roasted peanut airplane experience damn what if you take some peanuts on the plane bro what if you buy it from the duty free store and you bring it on the plane you eat it someone gets and you and you chew their mouth you just like sne that are good have you had the honey roasted once that that is crazy because like people with severe like nut allergies they can even smell it and already like be like somebody
7:38 eating nuts and it's crazy especially if you eat it like in Dumb and Dumber when he goes it just get everywhere where he's like doing low brow jokes why don't you eat up and will tell you is one of the stupidest ████ funniest things the best they're just hold their laughs little such a funny movie man yeah so apparently within 45 minutes after this happened she took cetrine and then her symptoms started to clear up she felt tired the next day did not have hives did not feel dizzy but then her ████ ████ swelled back downit SW back down what is this an ad for pharmaceuticals she didn't EpiPen herself right in that moment or anything no she went to the doctor what's the medication cetrine cetrine cetrine it's a ████ reducer you don't want that cliteris scientific
8:31 god dude do you think humans will ever like evolve out of this one the peanut allergy thing I think we evolved into it yeah yeah we keep them around well how did those people survive for eons right yeah it's an autoimmune disease I think people who had the disease they just died and then we're like oh we lost another one today in the village and you moved on now we're saving them so that they're birthing their genetic peanuts weren't in abundance back in the day you know it's only like a small part of the world that had it they didn't have peanut butter I heard a lot of our um they were EA PB and JS didn't like ask text we're eating that king T King Tut's favorite sandwich was peanut banana sandwich ban King I ████ peanut butter yeah peanut Butter's good peanut Butter's momb peanut butter and jelly Is My Jam yeah
9:21 it's pretty good all right you've had enough he's not a virgin we're cutting you off we're cutting you off that's your last fun today no more puns can we not do more puns the was is on accident can we list more snacks what's your jam though what's your gy strawberry yeah for sure me too you don't mix it up you don't go grape sometimes or a little raspberry I don't eat it so often that I need to mix it up all right dude was that a judgment on me do any of you guys use a syrup other than maple honey honey on your pancakes you know how they have like you know how they have like four different like uses butterscotch is there if you if you go to like one of those Hawaiian places they'll have like guava coconut oh yeah and the other ones are good I ████ up the strawberry syrup one cuz I'm garbage yeah I do that too I'm garbage too I've
10:12 never tried any of the go to any of those Hawaiian like baby Stacks they'll have like ████ guava jelly looks good who yeah exotic ones for sure because that's like unique but like we're talking about the trash ones what the trash ones IH they have butterscotch what do they got it's like blueberry strawberry Maple it's all just thick syrup thick high fructose corn syrup I think it's just high fructose corn syrup with color 100% And there's no actual flavor it tastes like strawberry maple syrup with ████ red 40 but it does taste a red strawberry it tastes like hella like strawberry brother it does taste like it like they took a s███████ of strawberries mixed them together melted them in a microwave and lady in the back to the whipped cream like oo and they like oh would you like fresh strawberry s I'm like no I want the ████ give me the syrup one dude is it actually good it's ████ fire dude
11:03 if you were raised trash you know you know what's good guilty guilty sometimes I want the chemical product yeah I just crave that people who who are like oh you don't chicken nuggets or rotisserie chicken shut the ████ up chicken nuggets all the way all day are you the type that when you buy popcorn at the theater you want them to like PP pump ████ I'm like don't ████ me don't ████ me you know what's good at IHOP if you get the pan and then you get the strawberry syrup you cover the whole pancake right then you roll it up so when you fold it this way it looks like a cinnamon roll then you get more jam and you put on a plate and then now you dip that thing and then you eat it wow who St threw up dude holy ████ dude yeah that's pretty it's like a strawberry cinnamon roll Steve's like did you grow up in a Trailer Park have you seen how ketchup yeah it's insane he uses he he gets like
11:55 a he uses ketchup like it's gravy it's insane it's like me and Tobasco [Music] he's just looking around czy I own my ship I go through a bottle of Tabasco like as big as my dick like every ████ like two weeks holy ████ you drink it they don't make it in this size you know what I started getting into the green bottles I the green bottle I go through a packet of sweet and low as big as my dick in one day
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