0:00 dude yeah just imagine you wake up after like 3000 years you're like all right I got a big dick and then everybody's like dude everything's the same nobody likes big dicks anymore it's just all small dicks I don't think it'll ever happen everything that's the only difference in society the ████ Ultima Nissan looks exactly the same just people don't like big dicks [Music] all right so there is this company in Arizona it's a cryonics facility you know what they do like freeze people not cryotherapy or like Advanced cryogenic to keep them for ████ 100 years just in case some ████ gets Advanced would you pay 200k to preserve your body no ████ no is there a guarantee that my body's gonna work afterwards yeah would you survive no but there is a guarantee that your body will still be intact by the time science catches up to that idea
0:50 oh hell no dude I don't trust it you don't want to wake up in year three thousand nah I kind of like I'm not suicidal but I kind of want to die at some point you know what I mean like it's like I don't want to be I was just talking about this yesterday yeah you know what I meant hey do you need a friend he Master suicidal though he said that already no it's just like imagine like you want to die you know that sounds so everyone wants that but it sounds horrible torture I would want to live forever if I could be this this healthy at some point like where I'm at right now but to be 95 and like feel 95 now I'm out bro I ain't doing that ████ like I don't I never want what's the oldest you think you would be my grandpa lived in 95 and but he was like bedridden for like five ten years I don't want that ████ to happen I I think I'll be happy going out to like 75 like but I want to be out heart attack I feel like I can handle
1:42 bedridden nowadays it's got so many streaming services I feel like it sucks for people back in the day they just had the life dude you'd blow your brains out I don't think I would want someone else to wipe my ass yeah yeah like ████ in a ████ diaper and stuff speak for yourself you know something about that sound kind of tired what if it's a robot by then interesting yeah or maybe if it's a robot wiping my ass that'd be kind of interesting yeah it'd be kind of cool but I was reading a book called being mortal by Atul gawande it's a book about aging it's just like it seems so terrible to be ████ dependent on someone else yeah yeah are we all like team pull the plug hell yeah oh yeah yeah yeah yeah take me now man that's gotta be the scariest thing is being on life support and you're
2:32 sentient and you want to die and your family just hold it on yes that's half of it it's like people are like beholden to other people's wishes I don't want that ████ to happen at all because like you guys have experienced sleep paralysis before right yeah yeah that's the worst ████ but now imagine that for three years straight put a pillow over my face shoot me in the ████ we're listening to your family grieving about finances to ████ keep you alive and ████ yeah I don't want that ████ hearing the doctor give the bills kill them we in the will he's moving his hand oh man he's just the cryogenic thing too like imagine 200 000 years in advance or whatever like how different like you wouldn't even the world wouldn't even make sense dude like none of your friends will be around you would just be like what you know people are like orbs now or some ████ it's like
3:23 just like it's we wouldn't even be able to Fathom how crazy the world is like or or even if it's like almost regular it's like maybe they could bring back your body to life because your body's intact but what about your mind and your soul you know what I mean I actually can't bring your spirit that's lame that's like he's gonna all sentimental that's why they put crystals can they bring you back with a bigger dick speak their language if they can regenerate at that point then I'm sure they can have bigger dick technology yeah but they're like not for that though and I'll be like oh but what if that's not in Style by then yeah yeah yeah yeah ball Dixon leave me in baby dude yeah just imagine you wake up after like 3000 years you're like all right I got a big dick and then everybody's like dude everything's the same nobody likes big dicks anymore it's just all small
4:13 dicks I don't think it'll ever happen everything that's the only difference in society no no it's everything's the same though like you wake up and everything is the same the ████ Ultima Nissan looks exactly the same just people don't like big dicks yeah no like you wake up it's like people are still going get into war or whatever whatever and it's like literally the same thing but like more LED lights the Tesla cyber truck is still not out yet and ████ but like big dicks are like out of style what problems did you guys solve nothing no that's I legit think that's what that's what would happen if you were to wake up like a thousand years in the future it just probably wouldn't be that different you don't think so no I don't think so it's gonna be crazy A Thousand Years look at 1970s technology look at now yeah but then once you look at the
5:03 Flash five years isn't it that you can't even go back in time more than I think 200 years or something before you're unable to understand in the English language huh that sounds like something like that let's talk about it right yeah like because the way people talk back then like it changes so much that you go back in time and you're like what year is it they'll just be like well your age and like the 1940s with all the stuff you know now you oh people your age dude they're being ████ working they would be like in a mind yeah people said Sport and ████ you know sport lad they'll call me I'd be like thine is make it my sack warm yeah and I'll be like what are you saying I'm horny it's like kind of what I'm saying right yeah and you wake up and then the main language in the whole entire world
5:54 is just Chinese oh ████ because they took over that I'd be really ████ yeah that'd be screwed but that's why little dicks are in what's up I think I would be frozen I think it'd be cool yeah just why not die anyway what age because you want it like to be young enough that's true you have to cut off at an earlier Point all that means it's like hey you're getting old you better now well you're sentient huh probably like 60s I think you want to get Frozen at 60. yeah I think so yeah I think it'd be good that's a good age how about this you can not only freeze your body but you can just do your brain for 80k yeah the bootleg version yeah give me
6:45 the discount for you not just my brain like put you in a cyborg body in the future possibly I'll do that one and even if they had the technology what is my guarantee that this company is going to stay in business for that long oh that's another thing GoFundMe yeah I know it's true you're about to launch a new business right now listen guys I got this idea okay that's a pretty big give me twenty thousand dollars I'll freeze you I promise for now I'll wake you up we gotta get in the cryo game dude you know what you know I feel like this really is it's just a ████ organ harvesting front yeah for sure but don't they have celebrities that actually do this ████ yeah there's 1400 people that are doing this right now yeah they're all they're already signed up Oh I thought they were frozen already I was like damn they're already crazy yeah you already got ice trays they're all doing this how is this legal some people are already Frozen for sure maybe not necessarily through this company but the
7:36 idea of cryo freezing and ████ like that to preserve your body it's already happened for like a couple decades or something well you're talking about your ████ people on Mount Everest yeah people have been Pros yeah people have been frozen ones yeah look at that no way there's Frozen people right now for sure but it's also a trailer how does that even happen like legal like legality wise like how is that even I don't know yeah I don't know you just signed a paper well in this one living people who plan that's plan to be prior preserved I don't know if anyone's Frozen right and especially if you got the first gen cryotech that's some garbage yeah you need you need the the third evolution you're just with ice cubes in the freezer like it says as of 2014 about 250 corpses have been cryogenically preserved in the U.S and around 1500 people have signed up okay that's uh that's already dead so let's
8:26 see yeah I think this is the same deal like it's it's more you're saying freeze when you're already a lot who wants to ████ go in to freeze before they die Encino Man are they already dying and then freezing themselves but this isn't like this isn't like hey you die here so this one is mainly for people with a terminal disease that are going anywhere now I feel like a dick so they wanna yeah man ████ those dead people yeah yeah yeah you're dying you're basically dead exactly like a jerk there's no cure does this mean they wake up in like a thousand years and then they just die then yeah okay how about this probably there's a girl who had brain cancer she she's from Thailand she's the youngest person to be crowd preserved at the age of two whoa whoa okay so they're hoping that they'll get a cure for hurricane sir in the future I'm looking for her
9:18 I don't know about the rest of them but then but what if she hates oil though oh yeah yeah oh yo then what bro damn bro that's a problem do her parents have to be cryo preserved too is she just gonna wake up in the future with no parents [Music] yeah I mean she just she said oh ████ the brain tumor I never knew existed is gone however I am an orphan yes yeah and you got to navigate this whole ████ world yeah and I'm a celebrity that I didn't ask to be because I was the first to come back out of that and also your two so you're not even thinking that coherently you're still like ████ in your pants yeah you're too you're just two you just wake up and you're like ████ my pants and then eventually figure out you don't have parents you're making it too real man but then they also don't yet have the technology to thaw a human that was frozen and they're totally fine
10:08 right oh man there's a lot of holes yeah it's hard enough trying to thaw chicken without like poisoning yourself bro how are you gonna thaw out a ████ human make sure they wake up like all good under running water constantly you can't even do the Blackout Challenge and wake up all good oh man yeah I don't know man it seems like a lot of medical professionals do not believe in this ████ they're just like it's a scam is this the same category as crystals they just write in journals all day yeah they've never Frozen anybody they don't ████ unless OJ the gynecologist what he thinks about it his medical ████ medical opinions Dr juice Dr juice that's funny [Music]
11:02 foreign
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