0:00 If you were evil subin, how would you be different in your life? That would actually be >> try to commit war crimes. >> Okay. All right. That's >> Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Guys, let him cook. Where would you start? >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> All right. Here we go. Since we're talking about it. [Music] >> All right. Um, if you were the evil version of yourself, >> do you think you would be more successful in life? >> Yeah. I think so. I think so. >> Change. >> Yeah. >> Evil. >> Yeah. If you were just the evil, >> we have a dark side and >> not caring too much. >> Well, I think I would take advantage of people more. >> How you'd be like, uh, get my coaching app that doesn't work. >> No, I think um I think I'd be a little more opportunistic, dude. I would try to use people a little bit more and
0:51 leverage them for >> fame. You'd mug people with arm bars, >> maybe. baby dude. Um, that's a tough one actually. >> If you didn't have people you care like nothing stopping you like let's say like you're just the evil thing I do want to do but then I'm just like oh but like I have my family or like oh I I think Hannah grounds me you know like something like that but if all those people are there you just don't give a >> I think I'd be more successful but more miserable >> in in what way would you be a how would you feel the misery? you wouldn't feel the misery. >> Oh, because of the the um what you call it, the actions, the consequences to my actions where I'm like, I don't give a ████ about you, but then clearly I'm going to end up lonely, but then it's like I'm not blaming my actions to that
1:41 because I just don't care about people. So, it's just like it's like being a sociopath, you know? You just kind of do what you want to do. That's the concept. But in what way would you Joe Jitsukawa be more successful as Evil Joe? like what would you actually do in your life that would be a different choice? >> I wouldn't care about uh not care. I wouldn't be afraid of consequences. So, I would I would just take bigger risks. I would do full criminal ████ Like I would just I just do whatever and and I'll just look at something I go, "Oh, this makes the most money in the world and just go do that." >> So, for me, like fitness would be a really good example without going into the criminal world because I feel like there is evil >> Yeah. version of yourself and then there's the illegal version of yourself. But if I'm staying uh within the evil version, that's still legal. >> Um because then now you're not running
2:31 from authorities cuz that's a whole another logistical problem. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> I think I think Nick could probably like um like vouch for what I'm saying. In fitness, you kind of know what works. >> Yeah. >> And what works is actually very boring and hard to sell. It's it's actually easier to go this is the insecurities that people want and you ████ market to those things >> with way less work. >> Yeah. Get skinny in 2 weeks or this crazy diet or this crazy thing. >> Get abs without doing one sit up. >> Eat liver and you'd be buff like me. >> And then a lot of the most a lot of the most uh successful people in the industry or not even people but companies or whatever in the industry are the ones that can really tackle that part. But then rebound >> when you are actually
3:23 scope and then >> teach them how to fish where they don't need you but then if they don't need you you make less >> you know but then that's the true thing of fitness where your goal is hopefully I can coach this person so good that they actually don't need my level of expertise like most people they don't need to be a championship powerlifter or >> or Mr. Olympia bodybuilder, right? They only want to just like maybe look good when they >> a healthy lifestyle. Yeah. >> Yeah. You literally need just one week of fitness education, but you just need a lifetime of commitment. >> Okay. Yeah. >> So, I give them a one week of education. >> I'm technically done. But the people that are really good at making money would be I have a >> You need me all the time. >> Yeah. Lifelong subscribership to
4:13 whatever the hell I'm selling. big fitness. >> Yeah. Then you become like big fitness and you're constantly >> um you have a cash cow. >> Do you think that ruins people's reputation over time though and then the end it kind of has >> No, I don't think so. I the way that I view in fitness, I don't think it ruins people's reputation cuz you have a entire new class of people that don't know nothing. So >> there's like new suckers every day. >> So they come in and then the people that actually learn, they don't go like, "Oh, you ████ are shady." they just graduate and then they go to the next like people they follow, the next people they follow. So it's not so much like all these guys are duping me. It's just they technically are speaking to you at your level. When you advance to that level, you just go above. >> But then that's the biggest ocean >> targeting vulnerabilities and just collecting all those people. Huh. >> Yeah. And if I but I think I know too much. So I'm like, "Oh, that's ████
5:03 up. Why would I do that?" And then so >> there's no conscience with it. >> Yeah. So it's it's fitness is a easy one. That's kind of the same way like uh why when I was telling you guys the evil me would uh would fake that I believe in in mystical ████ like to the nth degree because I you know it's something I obviously don't have that much respect for and I would just take advantage of it 100%. And I'd be like I'm going to musical therapy you're >> have you seen those videos the chicks like >> and I think like a like a person like the evil me would completely be able to put that on for life. I would be able to for life make you think that I really think these crystals are curing your cancer or whatever. Like ████ like that. Like >> soundath. >> Yeah, you could buy sound bath is so ████ you could just buy into that so easily. >> There's a lot of money in it. >> Yeah, there's a lot of money but it's just I can't because I I'm not evil me
5:54 but evil me would be the biggest purveyor of mystical cures. >> You'd be the yoga guy. >> How easily people buy that ████ Yeah, the beer yoga guy. Yeah, >> I would just start a cult probably. That's what I would do. >> ████ dude. That's heavy. >> You ever see the Mother God one where she's like, "I'm Mother God and you guys are you guys are my children. I'm God." And all their followers just do things for them. >> I saw the documentary of the guy that made a fake cult knowing it was fake. Did you see that? >> No. >> This dude uh he he said he was a uh like a what is it? Like a shaman or something from India. But he's just a regular American Indian guy and he did it as a social experiment. He's like, "Can I start a cult just telling people I'm this like mystical guy?" And he got all these ████ followers. The documentary is hella long. At the very end, he gets them all together and he tells them, "You're all part of the experiment. I was bullshitting you for years." >> That's right.
6:44 >> And they got so ████ mad. >> Wow. >> Voluntarily. >> They became like the documentary was heavy. They all like it got into their lives and they would they moved to like be with him and ████ >> A bunch of like vulnerable white people, too. It wasn't like, >> you know what I mean? It was people that had the money to do it. >> It's kind of ████ up to tell him. He should just kept it going. Probably they probably would have been happier. >> It was really sad. And then I think one person was like laughing and was like, "That's that's pretty cool." >> Damn, you're good, dude. >> Like they were just heartbroken and they just walked out. >> Yeah, it's a crazy doc. >> Oh, another one I would do, I would make uh real life Game of Thrones for JK News. >> What do you mean you would make us fight each other and die? >> Yeah, but then we all are in on it so the fans don't know. So it'll be like we'll start a fake fight between me and Joe. Hey, ████ you, man. ████ Should never did this ████ in the ████ first
7:34 place. Camera's off. Hey Joe, on your uh on your personal channel, do a rebuttal. >> Do a rebuttal with Anthony, though. Anthony starts a new vlog channel. And then you guys come to uh they they vlog secretly in front of my house. >> There's people that do that all the time. >> Exactly. But we have morals, so we don't do that. And they go they go outside my house, they go window. See, look what Barb's ████ doing. That ████ piece of s███'s li ████ with the enemy. This was hanging out with Phil Wayne from Wong Fu in there. And then you know, and just map out all kinds of enemy. for all of us on the whiteboard, we see episode one goes to episode two starts ████ here. But to me, it' be like it's so ████ up to play with fans feelings that I wouldn't. But the drama would be like million million views, million views, million views, million views. And then full circle like ████ 10 years down the line on episode 200. Oh, we're all friends. They're coming
8:24 back together. Look. Oh, it's like friends. They're getting back together. Remember that drama? I see Anthony. I shouldn't have done that ████ 20 years ago. You know, you're like that. We We're all in cahoots the whole time. >> That's true. Yeah. I feel like when you're evil, your the content you make is pretty. >> Is that ████ with the fans though, or is it like if they keep entertaining, they they want that. >> It's I think it's ████ with the fans. If you're if you're like trying to come off as this is sincerely what's happening. >> See, that was evil Anthony asking that question. I wouldn't I'm not I don't want to know. >> I wouldn't do that. Is the Anthony normally evil Anthony? >> Do you want to know the truth though, which I think we're all we're all understanding of at least this I think you guys can relate is that uh evil Anthony >> totally exists. Like I have those thoughts like I can think of anything
9:14 crazy at any given moment. It's just that when you just choose not to. Whereas I do believe some people can't fathom certain versions of things. But that's why because we have evil parts we can recognize. Like when I see the channels that have the fake drama, it's evil Bart recognizing it. I'm like, "Dude, that's not even real, dude. That's ████ up." >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. >> But yeah, but it's just the >> And you respect it. You're like, "Oh, that's cool." >> Like, "Yeah, that's kind of sick if I was evil." >> Yeah. >> We should just be evil now. >> Or it's like if you're evil enough to just steal everyone's ideas, you know what I mean? Like that, too. >> That's pretty evil. Copy and pasting. >> Yeah, it is. How about you? If you were evil subin, how would you be different in your life? That would actually be >> try to commit war crimes. >> Okay. All right. That's really heavy. >> Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Guys, let him cook. Where would you start? >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
10:04 >> All right. Here we go. Since we're talking about it, >> he had something ready for you. >> Throw the shades on. >> Not war crimes. I'm just kidding. Um, >> he'd be a drone guy. >> I'll be involved in war somehow. >> Okay. I don't think that's too far off. He's profiting off a wall. >> So we know we know evil sub is the real sub. We know real. >> Let's say that evil subin >> becomes evil subin after he already becomes a cop. How would the evil cop version of you? >> Oh dude can use that against me. >> That's the light.
// end of tape