0:00 every time I pee into a toilet I feel like it's going to waste it's literally called waste you got harder Tendencies he's a free use guy that's what he I just want to keep the cycle going so if I were to hit you up bar I need two protein bottles full of piss will you save it for me I would have to make it cuz I don't save it I like sure he's like oh I'm stressed out I got I got it's going to be a back [Music] order welcome back to a very cancelable episode of careful they're always going to be can we're here with jar dezman [Applause] everybody catch up it's been a couple years since you've been here yeah I was a dick and I kind of forgot about it well last time I remember you were like traveling in your van yeah I I was reminding you cuz I was talking about being in my van and not jerking off in it yeah and then I remembered but now
0:51 I'm not in a van and I'm jerking off again hey wait were you on a noof fap Journey yeah pretty much pretty much why did you want to do Seaman reten so you line up your chras and you can nut really hard when you find the right one just get super strong you know actually I I did I did I did feel a little bit stronger you did a little bit but just for that one Bust or like consistently for a while until it got a little bit weaker you know how you know how like when you first bust you're so sleepy it's like imagine the opposite of that sleepy you get awake oh wow well not even just like I was like more clear I was like Wow we've been busting too mons lately I got to stop busting so I can have some energy I can tell you look so relaxed no I'm not I'm actually really high energy what are you talking about no I'm not I'm so high energy right now you idea what are some of your like insights you gain from some tricks and tips no f a
1:41 year um honestly I would say like just had so much more time I know that sounds weird it's like hours dude it's like it's like if I take this thing off the table or thinking about stuff like that like my I just have more Hobbies how did you resist the urge cuz sometimes it's nice to have a good old bus before you go to sleep his van had a had like you know like a breath leser thing it w it won't start unless his C levels are like maxed out te retention depleted you has to we weigh the testicles man testicles full your semen has been depleted please wait in 8 hours um how did I not I don't know it you never had a night where you're like oh Instagram girl oh my god get off of
2:32 me or guy or guy get off like the girls crawling oh ████ what is she doing to me I don't I don't want to do this I said I wouldn't just crying the whole time oh this ████ again why algorithm maybe you get you get you get used to it why must you curse me it becomes like a habit I mean it sounds weird but it's like not drinking you know it's like I think it's just after I found like other tools every time I thought like okay I'm going to do this or like watch porn or something is it harder do you think to stick to a diet or to not jerk off damn that's tough it depends on the person I think for me it's harder to not jerk off a diet's fine still did it for a year I don't even know if I've ever stuck to a diet for a year that's hard as ████ too dude not jacking out for a year might be R
3:23 did you have a rule like you're allowed to bust if it was with a partner well so but I so that whole year I was also like being abstinent I was like I'm not going to I'm not going to date for you zero sex you have any close calls what was the closest call you had an animal like where do you want to go know Filipino plays guitar there's probably tons probably tons just you're in a van by or something you smell a lady and you're like oh God I got to go jerk off what is that Chanel oh jeez oh my palms are sweaty that's my weakness I don't know that mean tons I mean it's really just when you're by yourself in your thoughts yeah that's not when a lady puts her hand on her shoulder like hey I really like your set and you're like oh I'll go like this I'm saving that for later I'm going to remember this that's in the spank bank just a
4:13 hand on your shoulder damn that could be crazy though yeah imagine us going back to that era you remember when like you know early 1900s they talk about like if they showed you like their ████ lace sock you'd be like bro not busting for a whole year I don't think that can be done and guys yeah I feel like you were just having wet dreams every night oh yeah did you get wet dreams I I think cuz I I can't wet dreams if I don't if I haven't busted a while it's going to come out let's do a challenge chall how long it take you like 3 days wait wait it's November should do would you guys mustach oh no you guys are lucky I never had a wet dream before really me neither Joe me neither I'm probably too depleted to even achieve one how do you how do you uh how do you one anyway how do you purposely have one how do you purposefully have I watched this late
5:04 night Japanese show and they were giving you instructions on how to do it um this guy he was like he was like uh Jack he say you jack off and you edge to the moment but when you're about to bust and you go straight to sleep oh my that's even more discipline no that's even more discipline the host exactly she was like I'm so proud of you she was like wow like you could you have so much discipline and he goes yeah it's because the reward is worth the discipline I don't think David goggin could do that bro nobody he edges and he goes right when he was about to nut he goes okay now time to go to sleep lucid dreaming time that makes sense you know you know when you watch like a horror movie right before you go to sleep the next morning you're like Dam my dreams are crazy yeah but how do you how are you that sleepy at the highest point that's that's a good question when you're jet lag I
5:54 think it takes training like he probably failed hell times yeah muscle relaxers or something cuz you you need to bust to get to the sleepy or else you just you're just Angy you get powerlifter dreams now I'll go to sleep yeah you can't go to bed super saiyan then you beat your PR and your sleep he's just going to bed come on man yeah that's probably a very hard skill man that's actually really hard that you did that probably the ain't no thing probably the biggest accomplishment I've done in my life that's pretty you I look back on that I'm like I can do anything so do you remember your first one back back in the game yeah dude he's looking he's thinking about it I'm just looking into the distance yeah I remember that day what was the rule or
6:44 like was it like 365 days of no self-touching it was like I wanted to see if I could get to a year cuz I mean I I mean I don't know it weird but I started like jking off super young I was like a like the the Kobe Bryant of it how how old I bet you're not younger than me how old straight to you went straight to NBA I bet you're not younger than me dude oh man let's go test how old is that I was playing okay I was playing Metroid do you remember that game yeah of course don't tell me the part where she has know oh my God the freaking Justin Bailey code I was it was weird cuz I was like the first video game in Metroid when the character dies it's like you don't even realize that you're playing as a girl character I was P when I found out this dude came off like this isn't a buff ass man but why is that guy have tits the suit comes off and it's like this naked like blonde chick or
7:34 something yeah she got she has like just like a sports bra on like a like a little underwear thing yeah not what I want in my video games yeah depending on how fast you beat it will show like less and less and if you beat it like really quick the and yeah the ending will show her in like a little toot and you're like wa first time ever seen that the creator of that knew what they're doing that's brilliant I was like seven or some ████ when I was playing it weirdly brilliant yeah I remember cuz I got a boner in my sweatpants that's that's pretty interesting considering it was like 19 pixels but then when you're little you don't know what to do with it you just have it how did you know what to do what to do with it the game tells you what to do with it you read the game manual most kids don't read it they don't read the game it goes grab your blaster charge it up you have a boner now reload reload reload reload reload here's what you got to do constantly [Laughter]
8:27 reload so your first not back was was it masturbation or was it sex full-blown o having sex might be embarrassing cuz you you would bust in probably a second well so I'm like I'm like should I even tell this story yeah yeah totally 100% said your your friend told you something name my friend told me about yeah RJ mango RJ mang mango I should say it was something like super great like I was helping a gay couple have a kid or something so I had to do it um no it was like yeah I was having some SE some SE wowow how special though that's nice that is special yeah was she honored uh it was over really fast so that's F she before it was over were you like in ████ outer space I was like seconds I I gave a
9:19 heads up I was like hey this is going might be pretty quick I might transcend sorry I might just I might just hit Nevada don't be freaked outy it's not you it's me yeah you ain't doing ████ if all the buddh appear behind me my ancestors that ████ would be so tricky man so did you transcend after or what it was I I want honestly I was like or was it underwhelming it's like so it's so rare we get to have this conversation with any guy who's not who's not lying it I was kind of sad cuz it was like man I hel I held this in for like a whole year and was just gone and you're like I gave it up for you you said that's hurt you got mad you got mad at the girl how dare you take my seat that's my
10:09 seat I betrayed myself for you you didn't even hold it yeah you didn't even know my name I bet you had sex yesterday you're not even holding it in it's just dripping out now give that back give that back that's mine oh God yeah and the van won't start did it feel like why the ████ did I give away a year for this was it more like it's kind of like it's kind of like that whereas like did I need to do this that's extreme Focus though but you did you did reach your goal though that's pretty good man but like is cool would you do it again I would I would year I would but like now I'm in a relationship so like I probably wouldn't like I can't though I I have to do it I have to it's up to her she she needs it she's going to leave me if we don't get it she'd probably get really mad if you just didn't have sex with her for a whole year um maybe how about how about try something different like don't take her don't take her off to in her
11:00 for a year she'll live yeah she was like that's fine no big deal um I tell her I'm like hey I'm not going to we're not going to have sex for like a year she's like nice she's excited she's like right yeah that's perfect she's like that's what girls usually do not guys she starts testing you though she start to wearing ████ oh man Metroid outfits dude pick something harder that might be a fun game pick something harder like no eye contact for a year oh yeah I like how we're doing that and we're making eye contact as we do it like I miss this what's the benefit when you're like I can't in the eyes so I always have to look at your tits think your boyfriend's blind he's always looking up at the light the chair is blind dude hey what's up guys really good to be here man so dope it's like a random challenge is that even a real discipline did you don't even tell anybody you're doing that so was uh was ending the uh
11:51 non nut life at the same time as ending the van life no I still had the van I still had the van afterwards so I'm trying trying to think of when this all ended now I still had the van for a while so what made you I was nutting in the van again what made you change your Gypsy ways not van uh so I the when did I when did I go on this because I had um I was like a couple years ago right trying to remember it was the the office wasn't done he was still sitting in the Game of Thrones Hot Seat yeah cuz when it was the pandemic you I couldn't really go anywhere with it cuz I was taking showers at like Planet Fitness at the time and so all the planet fitnesses were closed I was just like logistically this doesn't even make sense oh so you did Van life before lockdown and then when lockdown came going into lockdown so you actually like early cuz everybody
12:42 started doing it after oh yeah yeah Vans became super expensive after that yeah it's crazy was yours a sprinter I can't remember which it was like a Ford Transit so it's like the Amazon delivery Vans but like white and creepy yeah I had no windows yeah hey would it be a trip to like bring people back to like kick it at your at your van or what oh yeah would they get kind of sketched out um like you bring girls back and they're just kind of like wait I've seen this in a horror film how come like com here talking about not jerking off she's like yeah this is getting weird cuz you were doing it before the whole B life ████ was like really cool yeah he like trust you trust we're not going to have sex I wasn't thinking about that at all he did it before people that work at Google started doing it yeah it it was right before everything got big cuz I think it got bigger it was already
13:32 trending but it got bigger during the pandemic and then and then people started faking it like crazy really yeah there was so many fake van influencers like they're faking their van life yeah they were just faking the whole but they're just housing it the whole time I know it's real or not if they talk about peeing in a bottle cuz I peed in a bottle a lot what' you do with the bottle I would just dump it I pee the bottle all the time even at home yeah just and I have to keep keep I have to keep it a secret cuz ████ Gio hates when I do it why do you pee a bottle is it so you don't have to move to the other room no so sometimes like you know you don't know how much PE you're going to have cuz sometimes it's a small PE or you have a lot right and then but I but I like it when I have the time I'm oh ████ this time's going to be a lot cuz I could feed it to the plants and Gio you supposed to do that I don't know Gio
14:22 doesn't like it when I directly pee on the plants she thinks it's weird if I'm peeing on Plants dude so I always just so like if I I think that kills plants is there a benefit in the for the plant yes for the nitri really for the NIT I feel like you would know that and then so I uh and then I would uh wait till I see her go into another room then I get like a big jug and I'll just take it to the bathroom cuz it sounds weird when you're not peeing into water you just like big buckets and then I go outside and I I water the plants you don't pour it directly on the plants you put it on the dirt on the soil so the soil oh it's an actual thing yeah that's bad macros that's bad macros for the plant a bacteria knows what to do with it in the soil how come you don't save your ████ and give it to the yeah if you're really hardcore I would but if Gio is already that opposed to P
15:12 think about how close-minded she is to ████ wait so so you pee in a bottle for the sake of the plans or just like as a fun game I mean for the sake of the plans that's a fun game cuz dude my dad used to pee in bottles all the time and he's still I think he still well I thought he did it for the freaking Foley he he did his jokes more of a hobby he just love hearing a water in this this is going to be for a rain sound like every time in Lethal Weapon with they're filling up a cup it's actually him pissing would be funny as ████ yeah my grandma used to my grandma used to reminisce about human F ████ fertilizer re that's her reminiscing time she used to be cuz when you know she would always have a garden in our backyard and then she goes you know it's just vegetables don't taste the same like they used to because they stopped using human poop
16:03 and when they started using animal stuff oh but the vegetables back then and the fruits oh it was so good but it just and I was like damn you I never heard anybody talk about like the sweet memories of kaka on a plant was she like a farmer or something that's like real recycling you know I would want to taste the vegetable difference side by side side by side compar she said it was really good but also people started getting hepatitis and ████ that's why a lot of Asians got ████ hepatitis you know that really that's why yeah I would stop eating that a lot of Asians got hepatitis cuz ████ we made tomatoes out of kaka so do you have a do you have a preferred bottle Gatorade wide mouth huh squeeze you I P to protein tubs oh like the holy ████ super wide mouth yeah that's why it's easy you talking Europe one of these
16:53 wait so you save a pea bottle and then you cap it and then I walk outside so what do you do with the bottle that throw the trash can what what does what does Gio say about you peeing in a protein bottle I think that's she doesn't know that's the thing oh ████ she know right you know what to do dude you know what to do bro make this into a short and send it to Gio just tag her a million times that's the caption every time I pee into a toilet I feel like it's going to waste it's literally called waste yo man you got you got hoarder Tendencies you know those hoarders they save their ████ and but they I don't save it I immediately use it he's a free use guy that's what he I just want to keep the cycle going so if I were to hit you up bar I need two protein bottles full of piss will you save it for me I would have to make it cuz I don't save it I like sure he's like oh I'm stressed out
17:43 I got I got is going to be a back order it's on back I won be to make it in time that's a lot of pee he's like this is this is made to order guys so I'm not Fulfillment company yeah you got to give me till the end of the day or something I make things fresh do you notice your plants are like healthier or different no cuz too sporadic you know it's like they all taste like piss now it's like randomly but then uh at my old house where we used to where me and Joe used to stay where my mom was my mom's house we had these two trees everybody pissed there humans dogs whatever and literally the sweetest tangerines Mandarin oranges lemons I've ever tasted in my whole life it was some good honestly that's all I need to know I'm we're all going to start peeing on trees everyone peed
18:34 there y so maybe the key is you have to have different people's pee what color is your urine usually pretty clear pretty clear yellow pretty clear usually I drink a lot of water okay urine can be good for plants when handled properly because of nutrients like you said they need nitrogen phosphorus potassium magnesium it's a ████ creb cycle right look up CP cycle it's all the ATP in there man there are some things to consider cuz fresh year and way can contain bacteria that may include genes for antibiotic resistance uh dilution using too much urine or not diluting enough can cause problems soil PH can be reduced through urine so there's a couple things that you got to you got to make sure your pH levels are good in your urine I bet if your your urine is like Barts where it's a little yellow but not too yellow you're fine if it's too yellow you might kill your plants brother oh yeah true yeah yeah plus this plants probably going like crazy cuz
19:24 there's probably like a bunch of creatine coming out of his buff plants yeah to he's peeing in the plants he's like use code Bart for 20% off those plants for Jack for too much is no good to too much is too much so what are you doing with your poop these days well that I got a flush cuzz's going to ████ but he's like it's a waste though Gio was like you know what I don't care what you do with your poop would you do anything different oh dude I would probably have a bucket for the palm trees I'd probably ████ outside I'd probably get all my dog ████ and then i' probably mix it with like ████ leaves and hay and try to make you're going to make compost some sort of compost nice I probably do that called a mud pie my grandma's in heaven right now going Bart knows exactly how to make fertilizer like God bless his soul man
20:15 oh those vegetables going to be so good I bet that you know you pooping in a in like a making your own compost I think that'd be a fun project you and taica could do together too he would love ████ outside you know how much ████ we have cuz dogs ████ like three times a day dogs are big too so much ████ have you seen the compost buckets that a lot of hippies use it's literally just a ████ bucket with a toilet seat and then don't they like turn it too like with all the they turn it yeah cuz they cuz don't you like a lot of the I watch a lot of Van life stuff and they have those toilets that have the the soil in there you mix it all up get one of those you better not be watching one of the fakers man I'm suck yeah dude I make sure that guy's really stirring his ████ yeah he's us really living the life he's not even stirring it right
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