0:00 [Music] Okay, I have a question for you, Melissa. What do you think it What do you think is up with guys in fishing pictures, like with dating profiles? Have you seen this? It's almost like an epidemic. I I heard >> I don't know. I'm not on dating sites. >> Okay. So, so the big thing is like guys will be maybe with their families, with their friends. They don't even barely smile, but then like they're on a boat with their buddies and they're holding up a big old fish and they're smiling ear to ear. They never look happier. Yeah. What do you think's up with that? >> Or or a deer. It's always like one of >> You know what? I feel like this is my first guess. >> It's weird to have a Maybe it's too aggressive to have a selfie >> and then you don't want to have a picture with a friend because then
0:50 people are like, "Wait, who is it? Is it this guy or is it this guy?" >> What if it's an uglier friend? >> Hot chick. the in the profile. You don't know, right? >> What if it's your mom? >> You put like, "Hey, me on the left." Like, >> you put your mom out there. >> Okay. >> So, I feel like a fish is like a safe option. >> Unless your mom's hot, >> maybe. >> What if the fish is hot, >> dude? What if that's all you got, though? >> No, but that's fish looks like ass land. >> So, that's kind of where I'm at. Like, why do you think it's like the guys are smiling ear to ear like they make sheshure cat like holy ████ They're caught a fish. Is But is that like attractive to women? Genuinely, >> it doesn't do anything for me. outdoorsy and capable like successful at it cuz you wouldn't hold up just the hook and be like >> and would it have to like always be is it always a big fish? Is it ever a little fish? >> It's just a fish. It's like some kind of fish. Huge bass. >> To them it's big. To them it's big. By the way, that's like asking the guy
1:40 about his dick size. It's like is it big? And they're like I think it's big. It's like that. >> That's a good fish. >> I think it's a pretty big fish. I think it's a pretty heavy >> It's a pretty good size actually. >> It's a heavy fish for this lake. That's what they say. I don't know anything about this fish situation. >> Well, no. It's apparently on the dating sites a lot of women, it's a meme that the women are making fun of guys for only smiling. And by the way, it seems to be like so many guys who have the fish pictures. >> I think it's cuz guys barely take photos. >> I'd be more into the the the guy taking a picture with their dog. I think that's cuter. >> Yeah, it's a good move. >> What about a guy with his shirt off? He's ripped and he's playing guitar. >> He's jocked. >> That's trying too hard. Why are you playing guitar? >> What if the guitar's in front of his bare >> china too hard? >> He's ripped. >> He's ripped. He's got a shirt off. Walking to grandma. >> Grandma across the street.
2:31 >> Put a shirt on, man. >> Doing all of the >> And he's And he's fending off bad guys. >> Gone off the bike. >> Fing off ninjas. >> Yeah. He's in his underwear walking to grandma across the He has the groceries while he's ████ up someone that's trying to attack. >> He shouldn't be with grandma in his underwear. >> The grandma has an ancient towel. It's been there after the towel. >> Gloves on, mask on that and stuff like that. And he's doing surgery. Shirt off. Ripped. >> Damn. Oh my god. That's a nice guy. Johnny Sims did that. >> Oh yeah, Johnny Sims. I heard >> a guy posting anything with his shirt off. Is that is green flag, red flag? >> We're dating. >> Yes. See, >> I haven't I've never I missed the whole online dating thing. I've been with my husband. Skip that whole thing. >> But if you saw it, would you be like pull it up? >> We're talking eight pack. Not even like four and a half like most like >> eight's too many packs. It's a little >> too intimidating. >> They're down with three. >> Stop with six.
3:22 >> Yeah. >> It's funny because like I >> Three to six is all right. >> The at least like the girls that I would ask that back in the day, they would be like, "Ew, that's weird." But then my homie whose profile was that is like, "Yo, check it out. A thousand matches, >> but how are they? But how like how legitimate and genuine are those?" >> Don't matter. It's a numbers game. >> If it's a numbers game, then yeah, take your find any last quality. But if you're looking for quality over quantity, >> he's like, "Oh, ████ My phone's melting." It worked. >> Grinder is crazy. >> Does somebody have dry ice? >> Grinder is crazy, though. >> I don't want to brag, but when I was on Grinder for one day, I got like six matches. >> I made him I made him a Grinder profile for like a few hours, >> and we got to see firsthand the kind of ████ that guys say when they're just trying to ████ you. >> Cuz like >> Oh, yeah.
4:12 >> Some dude said he was a ████ dumpster and I was like, "That's cool." Ew. >> Wait, why are you yucking his yum? That's his >> Y. Cuz we've never been on the receiving end of that. And then we finally saw because like this dude was like, "What are you up to?" And then we were like, "Oh, it'd be really funny and stupid if we said, "Oh, I love pinball." So we said and the guy was like, "Yeah, pinball is awesome." Yeah, I love pinball. Like what the >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He's just trying to get laid. >> Yeah. You guys will always agree with us. >> That's how we sound, dude. >> Guys, that's why you should immediately go that's stupid. >> I said I love pinball and fly fishing or something. Yeah, pinball improving and you were asking me what I like and I was like, "I like pinball. I do like pinball." And then it became about this guy just trying to pretend so he could ████ us. >> Anything we would have said, he would have been like, "Oh, awesome." Like, it felt so crazy. >> I thought we just hang out with this guy at the Pinball Hall of Fame and have a good time, but he wanted to ████ So, and after he said he wanted to ████ I was like, "So, you don't like pinball at
5:02 all?" question mark question. >> Oh, that's actually a good follow-up question. How do you feel about guys that would just say yes to anyone or like yes to >> Oh, she loves it, dude. Whatever. They love that. >> Like Jim Carrey, >> that's what they're looking for. >> Yeah. Yes. >> It's a great movie. >> Yes. Are great. >> Especially when they're trying to ████ Like they'll just say yes to anything. >> Isn't it better when they don't have any core values about anything and they just want to agree with you on everything? >> Do you even expect me to say yes or >> if you're will you seem like a chill chick, so >> but that was a pretty >> hopefully guys are taking notes out there. >> It was a crazy social. >> Now we know how it feels like to be pursued. >> But it was also what I expected it was aside from him. body already knows. >> I pursue all the time. >> Oh, >> you pursue all the time. >> I pursue fish all the time and I'm the guy with the empty hook going, >> "No, no, you're not right." The lying
5:52 the most lies ever. >> I'm the only honest fisherman today. I caught nothing. Here's my results, brother. >> Dude, I've caught you. Do you even go fishing? I catch nothing all the time. >> Actually is very ████ difficult. Sad. >> I'll catch a thousand mackerels. >> That's sad. But a dating a good dating profile for like a normal good guy would just be like a normal smiling photo. >> I think so. I don't know. I'm the wrong person to ask. I was never in this world. >> Pretend. >> What if it was a picture like this? >> Yeah. Let's just look at that and see. >> I was a little too doofusy. >> Oh, but that's my default though. What do >> I do? What if that's why >> you laughing? That's literally my smile. That's my smile. >> Wait, wait, wait, wait. Why are you guys laughing? Wait. Why is it Why is it getting pop? >> That weird look like dup. Why is it getting a pop? All right. >> You know what? What's wrong with that? >> I'll take the fish picture. I'll take
6:42 the fish picture. >> Who runs the profile? Which face? >> You look like right when they pull the bag off of an Antifa guy's head. >> I look like Patriot for deep. >> Got to read the news for that. >> That's such a funny photo. >> We don't read the news here. >> Which one's the guy? >> Oh, don't do that. >> Post it. Post it. >> Don't do that. >> Post it. Don't do that. >> I just wrote at Nikki Vimmo. Come collect this. >> Do it. >> It is It is pretty interesting though because like I feel like the friends that I've had that not you, but like girls when you ask them like, "What do you want to see on a guy's dating profile?" They'll say whatever they want, but like because no one sees them swiping and no one knows what they decided. The proof is in the guy that shows you what he got. >> And those dudes have the most douchiest profiles I've ever seen. They collect
7:33 and they're the like the biggest numbers. If you're thinking of it a numbers game, they may not end up with the most quality. >> Oh, but see see the face you make already chasing. >> Sure, you can get all of those people, but those are the lowhanging fruit, >> right? But I think everybody who gets a dating app does want to have a lot of results. >> Yeah, cuz more options. >> Yeah, more options. >> Not only that is it's a validity thing. They just want to feel like, oh, a lot of people like me, >> but they're not going to say yes to all of them. >> Yes, >> for sure. Yeah. >> It's that feeling of being wanted, I guess. >> Oh, there's guys out there that are going to try to go through the whole thousand. >> Yeah. >> Okay. Joe. Yeah. Them, right? They want to those guys. >> I'm retired, dude. I was hanging out. >> Joe was >> I'm out of the game. I told you >> my friend that had that profile. We were hanging out in Vegas in the middle of the night. This dude goes, "I think I'm
8:23 going to hook up with someone." And he goes starts swiping. He changes location to where we're at in Vegas. >> Damn. >> Swipe. Swipe. Swipe. Swipe. finds somebody matches chats. She's staying a few floors up. Wow. Up there and ████ within like I'm talking minutes. >> That's crazy. That's the internet. >> Well, I mean >> I've seen it firsthand like not even internet of like when you're around guys that are like very attractive. Women just literally walk up to them and say, "I'm not doing anything tonight." I feel like that's more normal. >> I wish all you said was like >> when you're with guys who are very attractive, like yeah, they can get it. But then but then this guy's tactic was this. He he had a he had a formula. His first photo was him at the beach. So obviously he's shirtless. The next one him with a dog. The next one him with his car. >> Good. >> So there was like wealth, fitness, and
9:13 whiteness. >> See, I actually think that ████ doesn't work. >> Well, here's >> Chicks aren't that dumb anymore. This is like fishing. They learned a little bit about the hooks going in the water and the worm on it. Like they >> I don't think chicks are that dumb when they talk about it. >> You got to understand this though. >> Yeah, the action's dumb. Absolutely do. I was with a home girl who I I for lack of a better explanation, I wouldn't say it's like classically fine. She's not ugly, but you know, she's just a home girl. And then we were in another country. >> This is great. >> She changes her location and then she's like, "Yo, I'm going to try to get some." And then she goes like this, blah blah blah. And then that night she's got some, too. >> Because women can choose. Yeah. They can do that anytime they want. >> Who is this? >> No, we're cool. Well, that sounds even more. You just You just could do that anytime, though. >> What's her IG? >> Stop. Aris
10:04 right now. >> I bet you know her. >> I'm just kidding. >> Your name's not. I just made up. >> But then, yeah, women are the choosers. >> Most most girls that are like like enjoying that lifestyle, like they're not ████ looking for their husband. >> See? So, it's like they're looking for the hottest dude to like have fun with. >> Yeah. But then there are guys that just want anything and they're not getting nothing. >> See >> that they're too ugly for ████ dating apps or they don't have the picture with the dog. They don't got the picture with that. That's the thing. >> But the fish doesn't do anything for ████ So just so you guys know, don't >> But I do think the only photo they have. >> I think you nailed it when you were like guys in general don't take photos. >> So like they're going to just take like I have three photos of myself. >> Splash Mountain on all of them. Yeah. >> It's like a photo with their family. >> Which one am I? >> Splash Mountain. Space Mountain.
10:58 >> Like this guy knows how to have fun. >> If a guy's not in entertainment, how many photos do you think he has? >> True. Yeah. >> We did have a home girl. She was a client at the gym. She lived in like Minnesota, but I think it was more of a Midwest thing. And she would complain about every single guy on Tinder all had a picture of the fish. And she would like vent to us about how annoying it was. But I think it's like that's just the culture out there for them to do. >> I don't think it gets women hot whatsoever cuz my buddy's a fisher guy. He's a fisherman. Uh and his his wife doesn't give a ████ and couldn't give less of a ████ And maybe actually by the day that he every day that he fishes more, she gives less and less of a >> 100%. Two guys, two guys, twins. They look exactly alike, right? One of them has super super huge fish. Huge. Impressive. Bigger than all the other fishes that you seen that day, right? >> The other one, >> it set a record.
11:48 >> The other one sitting at a slot machine looking like this grand jackpot. >> What the ████ >> Which one are you going for? >> The fish. >> Really? >> The fish. >> Cuz you're like one's a degenerate. >> Yeah. The other one's gambling. The other one's gambling too much. >> Grand and going off of his financials. >> Guy with the fish. guy with a a decent car who's thumbs uping out the window. Toyota Corolla. >> Oh, dropped. >> Why would the gangster, dude? >> You know what? I think it it'd probably be the fish guy because he's into like he has a hobby that I think that's cool. He likes to go out and do things. I think the fish actually might be >> I'm actually looking for I'm actually looking for a baseline here. Okay, good. Okay. So, guy who is with his mom,
12:38 right? And he's just like she's an Italian grandma. She's making ravioli or some ████ Or fish guy. >> Ravioli. >> I knew it. Okay. How about this? I have another one. I don't know. >> That's really cute. That's what I'm saying. Fish guy or guy sitting on his like nice car and he's like this. >> No. No. No. Nice car. >> All right. All right. I got one. My car or guy in a mask going like this being a >> with the fish with the fish. >> It'll be bleeped. That'll be bleep like that. Like >> no, dude. >> The fish. The fish. >> Okay. All right. Fish guy. Fish guy. Or like he has this tattoo, but it's ████ up cuz he had mosquito. >> Fish. >> Hey, where' that come? I don't know. I don't know. >> Fish guy or looks like blondfish guy. Fish guy. Dude, I pick fish. I
13:29 >> I didn't think I fish guy so much, but I think fish guy. >> See, this is why they post fish guy photos, cuz all the other options out there are fun. Fish guy. >> Fish guy is the base. >> Or a guy with two beautiful supermodel friends. >> Fish guy. That's dumb. Fish guy. >> Girls get jealous. >> Fish guy. Fish guy. Or guy who has his shirt over here so he always has his belly button. Now he's wearing slides. He's working at a matcha store. >> Fish. fish. >> Oh, the mother ████ >> I hate the crop top >> fish guy or this funny guy who photoshopped it so that the fish is huge and he's on the line like this. >> That's funny. That's the guy, dude. >> That's the guy you picked. >> The editor. The editor. >> All the guys picked the the guy on the line. >> The fish editor. Would you think would you be like he's funny? >> Uh maybe. >> She would say he's a doofish. Maybe he
14:20 is. Depends on how cute he is. That's not me. >> It depends how cute. He made you laugh where you peed. >> Can you not do it like that? >> Why you have to do this when you pee? >> Stop peeing. We're just trying to do a prompt. Stop peeing. Stop. >> But he's peeing in front of a cora that's dropped. >> What? >> And has a fish with a wing on it. >> You know what we should do is we should we should have an episode where we're like we're like we're like we're like big bros that help. We we help, right? And then like they have to they they have to they get a glow up from us. Okay. >> Fish guy or guy who's standing like ████ 600 yards in front of the sphere and he's making it look like a basketball on his finger. >> Shut the ████ up. >> That's really good. >> Come on. >> That's really good. >> Or it's a leaning tower pizza and he's like this. >> Yeah. Yeah. Which one? >> Or the genuine answer.
15:11 >> I would like that guy. >> The leaning towering. He's like >> because he's traveled. He likes to travel. >> Nobody does the same ████ picture. Nobody does the the the sphere one with the basketball. Nobody. It's brand >> sphere guy travels, too. He went to Vegas. >> Fish guy. Fish guy. Fish guy. Or this guy. >> E. >> Who's that? Who's that? >> It's Bart's ass. >> That's crazy. >> What? >> That's Bart's ass >> with a Lamborghini with his ass. >> Definitely not that guy. >> Oh man. >> Damn. So really, so like the our our innovator boy is getting killed by the guy who's done the same leaning tower pizza picture everyone's done for 200 years. >> Yeah, cuz it's international. >> Well, she knows she can talk about traveling cuz he travels. So like first easy icebreaker. How do what do you say to a Vegas guy that's doing this? >> Spear. >> So you've been to ████ >> Oh, cool. >> Tropicana Boulevard.
16:02 [Music] >> I love the spirit. >> He's so disappointed. >> He's so sad you didn't pick this guy. He can't even hide it. >> No, I'm genuinely glad that you answered it honestly cuz I think it'll help some people out there genuinely >> cuz I see people doing the >> Is that a real guy? >> Cuz I see people doing the whackest ████ No, I have no idea. I just made that up. But I'm see I see people do the whackest ████ out there like the fish guy and I just I hope that people just, you know, chill out a little bit. >> Hey, here's the thing though. If you actually go fishing and you catch a fish that is something that you would post, >> like you're personally actually proud of that. >> That's why they post it. >> Yeah. >> Don't show it to chicks. They don't care. >> Just being honest. Even if he makes you a loser, you're actually proud of it. It's an It's a point of honesty. >> It's who you are, too, though. >> It probably took 5 hours. >> My buddy Ryan goes fishing all the time.
16:52 He always sends me pictures cuz he knows he can send me pictures and I don't go like, "You're a loser" or anything. But if he's But like chicks are It's different. It's just different. They don't give a ████ >> That's not very interesting. That's like if I got a picture of crochet and I'm like ████ why. >> What? >> A picture of crochet. >> Damn it. He wins the video again. >> Won the video with the buzzer. Dude, >> we choked. We all choked. >> I would like the fish picture because that's something you like to do and you have a hobby and that's cool. Not because I care about the fish. >> I guess 35 million people doing like it. The Las Vegas sphere is pretty good. >> They're just sitting here. >> Yo, you probably start a new trend. Hey, let's go do those photos in Vegas and we'll change all of our pictures. >> Ceiling tower pizza. >> It's coming on top of me, brother. >> Or when you're on the other side of it,
17:42 you're like, >> "Oh my god, my p████'s ████ absolutely wet." >> I have a picture of me doing that. I have a picture of me doing that. Don't be a hater. >> That same day, that same day you were taking that photo, somebody was on the other side going like this. >> Dude, that's sick. Wait, you do have an actual >> All you're doing is all you're doing is holding it. >> Yeah. >> Oh my god. >> Groundbreaking. >> Swipe. >> I don't know if I can find it. >> Interesting. So, like >> two weeks ago, >> don't you think like would humor be a winning factor for a dating profile for some guys, do you think? >> Yeah, a thousand%. >> So, this is okay. >> No, not like college humor. >> Oh, not frat boy humor. >> I swipe, right? I think photoshopped as the fish is the best one. >> Yeah. Or like as you swipe it keeps zooming closer to the fish and the last
18:32 one. [Applause] >> You read further like this isn't about the men. I am the fish. >> Hello. I'm looking for a human compat companion. >> Bubble bubble. >> Who's going to catch me? >> Throw me back. >> And then you're like, I think this guy's cheeky. I sure hope it's the van. And then you show up at dinner and it's just a fish sitting in the chair. >> The Uber driver brings the fish. >> You send a fish to the Uber. >> The gills can't stop expressing. >> Not catching release pond. >> This guy never catches. >> Yeah. Never sending the joke. >> Dude, that's so funny. He never stops the joke. It's like, you dude, you can get her now. She's interested. No, no, no. We got to >> that fish at dinner or this
19:22 >> never that. Never that. >> ████ yeah. She ate the fish. >> Dinner wins, dude. >> Fish wins. >> ████ yeah. Pimp >> fish at dinner with express gills. That are struggle busing. They're like, "Oh, >> express gills." >> Oh my god. We got to looking for water from this air. >> So if all the once you swipe and you match and you can talk, all the correspondence is as the fish. >> Yeah. As the fish. Yeah. Gloop. You are pretty. I like your hair. >> On dot dot. >> Yeah, >> that's a lobster. >> You look like a mermaid. I have seen them before. >> Jesus. >> So, fish. Got it. >> End the video. ████
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