0:00 [Music] there's a united states representative who is currently um embroiled in a scandal no way um well he cheated on his wife no way powerful people that have a lot of options probably going to cheat male or female got a lot of hush money i mean celebrities do it all the time what part do you think he is he has three dollars by the way what party is yeah what party the donkey one green party the libertarian i think he's a death the tea party birthday he's a republican jesus christ okay damn it we're all wrong ████ i should have picked one of the two possibilities left or right donkey party what the ████ is that this guy this guy gets with a chick okay
0:50 yeah they're they're having sick i love this dude they're having this organization to try and de-radicalize a lot of like you know isis fighters and stuff like that by seducing them no no no no so so he meets her at this club for that because she is actually an isis bride okay so her dude is that like a basketball wife close but her her dude went her dude like left and went to go fight with isis and he's american he's american and so she's like an isis um what do you call it like like um widow oh ████ so then she she meets this cat uh the con the representative at this meeting like hey let's you know we're trying to see where people are getting to be extremists and kind of like suss them out and like help them right yeah okay so he he said he's they're supposed to
1:41 have a 15-minute meeting kind of goes pretty well it's due crushed they're like uh hey you know what this is a pretty interesting topic we kind of extend this meeting and this is what this chick looks like by the way so it was they were talking about interesting things she looks like she looks like she has tattoos over her eyelids and she's just closing her eyes like she's trying to sleep during a meeting she looks like like an old school egyptian painting like you know like in the ████ piece that's cool but she does look like someone painted eyeballs it went like this she's like sitting through a lecture with the eye of law yeah do you have any swimsuit pictures of her yeah yeah we need a better look do you have any swimsuit pictures of her instagram one step at a time so after this the
2:32 representative starts to um he gives her his number he's like we should definitely keep in touch about this entire situation this entire topic over and over i bet he said it like that too yeah that guy's cool guys she's very annoying yeah very professional about it yeah so then um pretty quickly she tells him that she finds him attractive oh oh so she's the first one to make the move yo this is a sting bro this is a ████ she's getting he's getting honey dicks can we see a photo of him yeah yeah stud muffin i i might as well just show you here this is a picture of him [Laughter] do [Music] yeah i would like to see that for reference send it to him i'll send it to you the court has to see both of those and what's his tick tock content like it's very right wing he's very very right right wing dancing yeah right-wing so in one in one extremely graphic text
3:23 that um sexton the congressman sent to her he requested a quote a long slow rim jump wait wait mike yes now i'll show you what this guy looks like oh ████ up oh now you show us yeah i'm going to show you what it looks like wait you requested a long slow rim job the question is did they did he get it though cause i don't know but like they had an affair right it doesn't say what did they have on the hair i'm waiting for steve to just show us an app before you show before you show i have a question for joe really quick i don't care what he looks like before you like uh court another lady for the first time do you lead with rib job like that or do you kind of yeah something you grow but but if this guy's a little forward but i talk about it all the time it's not a mystery he doesn't have a lot of time long slow rim job he looks like a bootleg mad tv character
4:15 had sex with ████ mr rogers y'all see i don't know i didn't know he'd like butt play like that he i'm telling you guys it's the new blow job it's the new blow job why do all these senators look so creepy they look so weird looking he represents us dude you take it easy sorry sir he's california not my president you're not california don't be saying oh what the ████ out of here bro nevada dude you ████ accomplish the justice texas the great state of texas so uh yeah now he's probably going to lose i guess he's a backboard ted cruz probably going to back out and lose a pretty big time he didn't really get to back out because she didn't take his back out wait so she leaked the she leaked the text messages is that what you call it when your chick is can you take my back out baby take it out uh yeah so she got tired of
5:05 seeing his face all around town because um they broke off the affair after a while and she's driving around town seeing him campaign and ████ and she's like i'm sick of this ████ this is not the perfect family man ████ this ████ so she she called you know how many times i licked this fool's ass my question is how did a guy like that get with such a hot freaking cleopatra of a woman i don't know man it's crazy i think she was in a vulnerable place when her when her husband's vulnerable like super lonely and this dude was probably tugging on those heart strings and knew and what club where would you see both of them in the same ████ club it's not ████ hard fast it's not electric daisy carnival like i can't believe someone would use power to get ass i really can't i'm just curious i'm just curious what club oh the power was attractive so it was more like was it using power to give it it was an
5:55 anti-extremism oh man i thought it was a ████ night like a like a lounge clash rizzo loud it was a right wing it was a hookah rim job lounge that makes sense that's like a key club that's a nerd club that makes sense well key club is also a club out here what is the key club anyway yeah that was the a part the a part is like hey this is anti-watch yeah i thought it was like omnia or like you want to talk about terrorism what okay my husband left me for isis he's like hang on one second i got to push all the water out of my ████ getting clean and clean for you so you think i'm attractive no i said this is entrapment what are you drinking there's like water
6:45 it's going right up my ████ [Laughter] so yeah um okay that's fun though i mainly just wanted to do the story because of the rim jump thing so there you go and that was for joe there you go so so just to get the timeline right just so i'm familiar uh this had happened previously and then he started campaigning october 2020 to june 2021 now he's running for re-election okay because he's already he already had his power and he was meeting with her as part of this like anti-extremism group slash rim job parlor you know i think we need to normalize rim jobbing because i think this scandal is because there's a stigma against rim job versus ████ because if this guy was getting mobilized rim jobs no one's going to be like oh let's not vote him in because he's getting ████ people are just ████ rim job phobic is what it is and they're like i'm not
7:36 voting this far he gets rim jobs why don't you do something about it you have a show you have a bar for man i'm spreading awareness and my own legs no but i'm saying you should buy a spot on your own show so when you're doing when you're doing careful boys off the record for the 10 minutes so yeah you can you can sell people on the new blow job this video is brought to you by ████ rim jobs it's a psa um let's normal life [Music] have you heard of the rusty trombone and then i want bart's like enthusiasm really you gotta check out rimjobs he's like i'm telling you guys not really my style but i'm sure it's fun spread awareness and cheeks and my butt what's the most optimal way to receive a rim job is it laying down legs up yeah or are you doing one of these things you're the dog i'm the dog that's cool oh do you have a call it's called
8:27 greeting at the dog park i mean you guys both look like dogs if that's the position yeah how do you how do you how do you feel how do you feel safe with with her back there how are you do you wear a helmet with the ████ side mirror like this so you can see what the hell is going on hey what are you doing back there look at your nest cam you're watching it while you do your ████ ████ i i well sometimes i just no she has the doctor's thing or i grab the bed sheets and i scrunch up the bed sheets and i put it in my mouth and i have something to bite on what's the thread count on those ████ i feel so uh this side of the table man that ████ got too real why are you doing
9:18 that kind of ████ like the bed sheet no this is you gotta you gotta get the bed sheet you gotta make it into a ball like this like this ████ ball right and then there's a grip i think we got it i think we got it that's the old-timey ████ dude it's old-timey i hope i don't see no wrinkles in your bed sheets when i come over no we iron them out dude that must be the ultimate ████ embarrassment though when your sex go out like that oh cause that's the worst time you imagine if somebody ████ got a hold of your old aim ████ conversations when you first didn't know how to do that and you said the weirdest ████ to people through that's politics right especially when you get that high level and you already know you're going against people that are competing against that's why i don't understand why ████ politicians even use regular texts they think they're powerful they're they they're just so they think they won't get got yeah yeah why i'm gonna run for politics that's
10:09 right because i'm already planning this is my you're gonna run for politics just general right now i'm joe tatsukawa and i'm running for joe just call endorses his message i'm gonna ████ i'm gonna play politics because i already have you guys here jojo's guy was running for politics i already have this ████ on luck all right you know what's gonna happen is no one can ████ beat me because i already ████ beat myself what about that ukraine dude they got all these comedy videos popping up now but he's funny that's like jimmy kimmel right like like somebody that's like safe all right this is this is joe's campaign poster ████ come on man a small man is they can cut it if they want to [Music]
11:08 [Applause] [Music] you
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