0:00 Usually racism is correct. So what's the racist thing about Filipinos that we need to know? Well, so warn us. Filipino dudes are known to be crazy toxic gaslighters. And so I was like, "Oh, that seems like Filipino symptoms." That they got to cheat on you. All right. Welcome back to another episode of the Careful Boys where again we got to give props to everybody who joins us on the Patreon. Thank you guys. Hello. When you are a patron, you can jump in the Discord community with us and submit some questions and articles. And this one is submitted by Aurori Aurori. Aurori Aurori Aurori. Uh, what is your go-to approach if you found out that someone you were close with was bad mouthing you behind your back? I would pull them aside and ask them
0:50 what's going on. 100%. Yeah, right. I would stand across the room. Stand across the room like this. I've done it before. It's the best. The best way is to you know the information and now you're vindictive and now you're going to with them. Keep in the back of your head forever. No. Well, what have you done in the past? That's probably We're so old. We probably have been in this situation. I was in the situation and I So, it was it was really in a roundabout way cuz it was more about my chick and she had a quarrel with another girl, right? and I and I had to go to a a bachelor party with her boyfriend. And so instantly it was going to be weird. And so I just walked in. I was like, "Hey dude, we you and me, let's just go talk real quick before before anybody gets here." Like cuz the bachelor hadn't come yet. And so I just wanted to handle it real quick. And I was like, "Hey, what's going like I don't know what's going on with the girls and all that
1:41 ████ but like like we're you have a problem with me? I don't have a problem with you." Like that kind of ████ And then we was like, "All right, we're good. We're But you heard he was talking ████ or you were just I didn't know if he was talking ████ So I I wanted to I wanted to I know that the girls were talking ████ on each other and so I just wanted to what girls always do. I know this was like a decade ago, but it was it was very helpful that I did that because then we had a great time. It's a big move. Yeah. Yeah. That's just the best way to do it cuz if you have awkwardness with somebody, you might as well just bring it up. I think there's a difference between like like I've heard someone say something about me that was true like I did do something up and it makes me like reconsider myself and make changes and it's actually very useful sometimes. And then there's times where like it's just somebody's opinion and it's kind of like based on something else. I just for the rest of my life consider that person ████ Yeah. I
2:32 Yeah, that's a good one. I think it depends on what what what Yeah. like what's considered talking ████ And two, I expect everybody to talk ████ Like I expect everybody to make fun of me, say something behind my back, all that. Because that's natural. People get together, they vent, they they make funny observations, but it's not really s███-talking. They still love you, but like people all do that. That's just normal. And sometimes ████ will take that information and then they'll give it to you because they want to stir up drama. Yeah. And that I actually hate the tattletail because that wasn't meant to be for my ears. That was supposed to be someone's just like venting because they had an issue with me that they couldn't confront me about and then they're just saying their ████ but they don't really not dislike me. But I can tell if someone actually dislikes me. Like when someone doesn't really like me, it's like you can see when they're
3:24 it's like it's like Yeah. They can't be Yeah, for sure. I think I could I think this guy does like but the cattiness like like guys that that are are not real like they can't be straight up like I'm just like covert. Yeah, you can see that ████ you know? They're kind of weird. Yeah. But I don't know. I think it's like at this age, dude, who the ████ cares? You want to hear a sad a kind of sad story like ad or go? Yeah. That I can tell while Ken goes get the food and then someone dies. No, no, no. It's like, it's sad because it's like really was like a big deal at the time, but uh there was a point in high school where like one of my best buds started to have feelings for my girlfriend at the time. And then um I guess like they had been writing letters to each other and ████ And I found out about this
4:14 like like I found out a little bit later. I bet you he still has letters. This was like this is like one of my high school best friends. And then so like he uh at some point he he had tried to like stir up a notion that like I was not good to her. Oh, that's ████ So he was like talking about it to like a bunch of good like friends of our circle being like, "Oh, Ryan's like really abusive. Like we need to do something about this." It got so gay. This got so gay to the point where like he held like a prayer like with the guys for us to pray about like my relationship. Everybody in that room, she got jumped and you were there too. And I was there. Yeah. ████ I was like, "What the ████ is going on?" And because he wanted to be with her, so like that's he wanted to break you up, steal her. So he was like praying about he's like, "May may Ryan stop abusing his chick." Basically, but
5:04 not with not with those words. And then it got so extreme that like he had told my teacher at school that I was like possessive over my girlfriend, who didn't go to the school, by the way. So he doesn't He told my history teacher and she gave this lecture to the class directed at me without actually like addressing it to me about how we should treat the girls that we're like dating and how like no woman should be owned by a man. And I was like ████ up and she just took his words for face value. I know exactly. I was like she and she would walk around the room talking and then look at me like this as her lectures going. I'm like that's incredible. You ████ kidding. And then so me and him had this like massive falling out and then we didn't talk for like I don't know over a decade. Wait, did you know that it was that was happening or was it in? I found out
5:54 after I broke up with her because she showed me the letters they had and she Oh, so when the teacher was talking about the relationship stuff, did you know that or were you like why why isn't she talking? I didn't know it at that moment. I thought we were just like having a norm but this was US history. I was like why are we saying so why why does why did your girlfriend at the time keep talking to him and doing this? So, she was kind of cheating. She was they I don't know if they like did anything, but they she was into it a little bit. And then when we broke up, then she told me all that stuff. And then uh I tell you later, it was like Yeah. The reasoning behind it was kind of complicated, but it had a lot to do with the fact that this best friend of mine, he was dating my cousin previously, like a couple years back, and I had to tell my cousin that he was cheating on her. So, he harbored that a little bit, and then like it ████ with our thing later. But like years later, like our one of our best friends in high school,
6:44 his mom passed away and we were at the funeral together and uh he came up to me and was like everything that happened back there, he's like, "I I just wanted to apologize for it." And I hadn't talked to this guy in like 12 years. And we were just like, "Oh s███." I'm like, I've never confronted the issue. Like I always knew it happened, but I never I never talked to one person about it. Oh, so you knew because your ex told you after you guys broke up, but you're just like, "Oh, okay." Well, he knew just because we stopped being friends and it was like when anybody would ask like, "Damn, what happened to you guys?" Like, I don't know what he was telling people. What were you telling people? I never got asked really cuz I that by the time I left high school, I just wasn't hanging out with a lot of people from high school anymore. How How did you process when your ex-girlfriend told you all that stuff? It was It ████ me up pretty bad. I was just like, "Damn, I
7:34 can't like I can't like like admit it to anybody." Cuz it was like so like embarrassing. I was like, "Damn, that ████ to like go under you like that and have all this thing happen." It was just like It feels like a like a rug pull from both sides. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Which was like by the time I found that out, I had already broken up with her anyway. So, it didn't sting that way. It just was like such a messy feeling of like, damn. Cuz a lot of those guys are I'm I'm really cool with all of them now. And uh crazy enough, the this last uh wedding that I was at a couple months ago, my cousin married someone in his family. And so me and him were there together in the Philippines. And now we're related cuz through marriage. Yeah. Me and that guy. Yeah. What the hell? And it's like we just have such a crazy like history together that it's like damn. Did you forgive him immediately when he's like, "Hey, sorry about all that." Or were you like I did because like that was high school ████
8:25 and like I think we're both really ████ embarrassed by that whole Did you get back at him though at the wedding? You should have held a prayer for him. I did. I'm like, "Yo, this guy, he was hanging out in the red light district." I did almost spending a little too much money over there. I did almost like do something really bad at the time cuz right when I found out I was like super heated and I I went to his house and I never go to this guy's house cuz I'm not He lives with like he lives in like a condo with like mom and dad and then four brothers. So like they just don't have people over. But I like showed up and then I think like he knew that I was there for something bad and he didn't come downstairs and his brothers all answered the door and they were each each brother at a time but he's like no but he's not home. He's not home. Yeah. Yeah. I'm glad and I'm glad that that it didn't nothing happened cuz I was nuts though back then. So it was good. I'm glad you calm down now. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Now I Now he gets
9:16 revenge like this, you know. But I I really like I love that dude. Like it's it's such a because it's high school and like obviously I wouldn't have stayed with her anyway. Like who you know who stays for high school girls? Only a real Can I give a racist prediction? Yes. Is he Filipino? He's Yeah, he's half. I knew it. Japanese. Wa. That's a crazy mix. That should pervert the perverted side. No, it's just whenever something happens, usually racism is correct. You thought I was Korean. So, what's the racist thing about Filipinos that we need to know? Well, so warn us. No, no. Ryan says this all the time, but uh Filipino dudes are known to be crazy toxic gaslighters. And so I was like, "Oh, that seems like Filipino symptoms that they have they have like a Casanova gene." So if he's like cheat pervert,
10:07 Filipino player. Yeah. Cheating on your cousin, trying to break you guys up, squeeze himself in, gas lit the teacher so the teacher can give a special class. I think like that because of that I still like I don't hold grudges. You have trust issues. I really have a grudge against that teacher for it sounded like he was trying to convince himself of this as well. I think I think so. I think he admitted I think he admitted that later. Yeah, he definitely admitted that later. But but that teacher the nerve of her like she'll always ask me to come back and talk to the students about ████ and like be like an alumni. Like I'm like you don't ████ remember like what you did? That's so ████ up. This is all starting to make a little bit of sense right now. Why? Like, you know, it's like Brian's Omron, right? It's like there's got to be inspiration points in his journey. The origin story. Yeah. Yeah. Trash nobody. Why does he think
10:57 the way he thinks his best friend ████ backstab? But it's such a clever backstab, right? It's such a like convince the entire ecosystem around him that he's the issue through something. So, that's gaslighting. Yeah. That's like on some next level high school ████ When I was a kid, I used to like check my closet for the boogeyman. Now I look under the bed for omocron, dude. I see tattered jeans. Is that I do have your gate code. No, that's what I'm saying, dude. He look He's going to live pretty close to me. I' I' I'd give him some grace, though, because my ex could have been feeding him stuff and thriving off of the attention. I think my And then so he's like, "Oh, I got to save her now. I got to ████ save her." cuz I'm like, "Dude, she has to take accountability for ████ basically cheating on you at that time." And I I know the point where it started. I can
11:47 pinpoint the exact moment. Was it the love letter? It was a story just sounds crazy and crazier. There was a a situation where her dad had literally beat the ████ out of her one day. Oh, she had a really abusive father and uh style. She lived in West Cavina and his house is the closest to her house. So I I picked her up, rescued her from her own dad, brought her to his house so that we could like patch her up. And then there was a moment where he was like kind of tending to her wounds and they were just looking at each other and I was like that got deep right here between me and Ryan for a second. I was like no way. That's a movie. I think they like give me that cotton swab. Trauma bonded in that instant and then that's when they started talking to each other behind my back. That's why I don't touch nobody's wounds. Yeah, bro. You got Hey, here's some here's some gods. You can do it. If I fall in love, man. Nick gets hurt at
12:37 jiu-jitsu. Bart's all like, "Oh, Nick, bro." Yeah. Oh, ████ ████ up. Yeah, I kind of like Nick now. I never seem so wounded before. Let me take care of you. That dad was Filipino, too. Yeah, I knew it. I don't know. I don't stole the backstory and was like, "Ryan's abusive." I was like, "Wait a minute." I had to clean her up one day after Ryan tuned her up. Dude, that's that's some dark ████ Imagine them going to school. Even though I know that girl doesn't go to your school, imagine going to school and she's got like scratches or bruises and the friends like Ryan did that. Oh my god, that would be crazy. Crazy. But that's a move a high schooler would do to try to get out a chick, you know? Like they wish, but she's so stupid. She She don't remember. Her dad did it. She It was so bad. She had to stay at at our house for a while with with my parents. Damn. Yeah. And then her dad found our
13:28 house old school style using the ████ Thomas guide and he just showed up at my mom. I want my daughter. Yeah. Literally like that. And did your dad go? No. No. My dad wasn't old, but my mom was like, "Oh, we should we should let her go. She needs another big thing." It was really dramatic. It was a dramatic senior year. That was your senior year? That's all. All of that happened my senior year of high school. Yeah. High school ████ sucks, man. Senior year is a TV show. Crazy. ████ So over dramatic though, but it's like you kind of like I don't know if it's like you're making it dramatic or you're gravitating toward it, but like everyone's making everything. Yeah. Yeah. Something about like it's like all of these things could have been solved in a very minimalistic easy way, but we always chose the higher like more tumultuous route. I don't know. It was just like more exciting to have a ████ life back then. I think we're just dumb. So we just use dumb
14:18 ways to solve ████ Our reference are movies and ████ cuz they would do that in every TV show where it's like we have to hold an intervention for this guy. He's addicted to caffeine pills. Movie in high school. It's the worst thing ever. It's like what everybody did. Some people never grew out of that. Yeah. Everybody still does that. Some people never they want a metal and ████ Yeah. Some people never grow out of that. That's the dangerous part. How about call the police? But nobody in the Asian community does that ████ Nah, they handle within. They don't do that. They don't even call the police when they get robbed. Also like ████ the police era. Yeah, that's true. They're the enemy, brother. You know what is uh incredible and very mature of what Joe said earlier that's still randomly rattling in my brain. What I know it's incredible. Um but Joe was talking about how you just expect everyone to banter and talk ████ about you in some version whether it be like venting or light-hearted or just bonding
15:09 with other homies in a different situation. And it's not meant for my ears. Therefore, I'm more mad at the person who's telling me and just being okay knowing that like you if you just expect that, you know, then it's cost of business. Us willing to talk ████ on Steve when he's not here, but it's not because we don't like him. It's because like that's like part of what makes us a relationship group as well. You know, it's fun. But I don't like you, but the point is out of context. Once it leaves that combo, it's out of context, not packaged the right way. the other person. You don't know what state of mind they are when they hear it and it ████ them up. I think I had a hard time with that when I was younger, too. Not just accepting that like that exists. Like I do it. I'd be a hypocrite to be offended when somebody else kind of talks ████ about me in a certain way when I'm like, "Motherfucker, I do that to everybody all the time." And every But there's a difference between talking ████ and like just like gooseing your
16:01 friend a little bit. You know what I mean? Like there's like a real ████ talker is like dredging up crazy ████ That's a ████ talker wants you to persuade someone not to like them like based off of their experience, right? Exactly. That's why I think it depends on what s█████████ is and like how you Hundreds is here, right? And like we're I'm just like it would be really funny if Bobby Hundreds when he ever met Anthony. It would be really funny if if Bobby Hundreds like, "Oh, is this that 9/11 guy?" Like I was like that, you know, like that's not ████ talking cuz it's like you're just like or when you're like, "Hey, Bobby, you ever heard of the air sesh?" And I think these guys copied you, man. Yeah. ████ like that. It's like that is just so ████ dumb. Like to me, it's not ████ talking. But if you're a really literal flirting real good on the line, it's to see it's for you to see and go ████ Steve. It's It's not. But people who take things too
16:52 literally maybe are like, "Oh, that's crazy." You're just on a tight rope on the line. You're like, "Is this ████ It's made for you to see." So far from the line. But imagine if I was just like, "Oh, this guy like he ████ you know, cheats on his girl all the time or whatever." Like that. You know what I mean? Like that's not really funny. That's just like, "Yo, not funny." Like, "Okay, well all the time like Yeah. Why are you telling me this right now?" He got he got married, but then like that night he was with another girl like for the wedding night and ████ like that. Like that's actually crazy ████ He told Bobby, "What do you think?" Oh, he just went he just went, "Bobby, do you know what kid is?" And he was like, "I'm not familiar." And then Steve looks at the camera and goes. He's like, "Yeah, I do remember that. That's so ████ stupid. That's so That's so stupid." Like, see, nobody's ever heard of Kenj. Like, you win now.
17:42 It's so dumb. Do you think for s███-talking Do you think for s███-talking it has to be a lie? Because sometimes people will know something personal or secret about you and to damage your character, they'll say that in a group to hurt your reputation. So it's true cuz I know you mentioned earlier is like if it's true about me or whatever, you know, then but I was like that's still to me that's still ████ talk. Yeah, it could be. I think it's the intention. Yeah. If they want if you're seeking to hurt your rep like you said. Yeah. If someone's trying to hurt your rep like behind your back, that's ████ talking. Cuz I don't like when other people come to me and they go, "Oh, this you heard about this guy. He ████ sucks." Like I don't like that either. If I know who they're talking about, but if I don't know and they're trying to protect me from doing bad business or
18:33 like, you know, being seen with the wrong person, then I can understand that. I like to I like to like if I say it about you, I say it to your face. I say it in any room that I'm in. Same way. You know what I mean? Leg legit. Like that's how I like to be. I don't know if I'm perfect at that, but that that's what I try to do. I don't know. At this age, though, it's like, dude, who the ████ cares what people say behind your back, dude? Like, come on. I mean, for someone to care that you won't like the same person they won't like is pretty dumb at this age. Agreed. But I want you guys to not like the people I like. But as homies, ████ Jeremy. The two-facedness is what's disappointing. So in front of you, they'll be like h like, "Oh, I love this guy. He's the best." Whatever. And then they're they're actually being malicious behind your back. Like it's nice to know that you admirably love the people you talk ████ about most. Yeah, I agree. That's why we talk ████ about this show on the
19:24 show. On the show. Exactly. It's part of it. In front of us. It's part of it. Well, we love the show. Yeah, cuz off camera. Yeah. No, don't don't cut that out. Cut that out. Cut that out. Cut that.
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