0:00 So, like low key, I recently just kind of made my mother-in-law cry. What? >> And we was at we was at this like brunch. Uh this is our first weekend in LA with Lana. And so, we're just hitting up all the families and stuff like that. And then on our last day, it's Sunday. We're going to go back to LA right after this brunch. We dim sum with all of Nah's family. And then I do this thing where I just set up I thought I was super proud of this. I just set up which I am uh Nah's 529 which is her higher education kind of like taxfree retirement fund but like for higher education and then I was like in my mind I was like yo I'm going to be super Chinese I'm going to take care of this bill which I often times do for the family when it's like I'm asking them to get together if so we're celebrating something for us or it's like our baby's thing or whatever like the whole family is getting together because we're visiting time I I I feel like I need to take care of the bill or like you know
0:50 it's just whatever >> I take care of the bill and And you know, we do the classic Asian thing like no no, you know, it's like 3 minutes of like no. >> I hate that. [clears throat] >> Which usually is like it's that's just the regular battle. You just kind of like talk it out until everybody accepts the fact that the bill's already been covered. There's nothing nobody can do. >> Someone sneaked out to the bathroom and paid it already. >> Yeah. Yeah. Classic move. >> This time I was like, well, you know, it's this is my family is, you know, I'm going to use this, you know, we're close enough where I'm going to use this as a a way to ask them to contribute to the 529. I feel like that's like it's it's not common, especially in like first generation Asian households to even be aware of what they are, let alone for an Asian parent to be like, "Yeah, let me contribute to this yearly or monthly." Like there there's so many questions, right? So I go I go, "No, no, no, don't no, no, don't worry. I got the bill, but
1:40 it's because I have a favor to ask of you guys." >> ████ >> Right. >> Let's quit proquo. >> Yeah. I was like, "Oh, >> the problem is I I got a situation. I need you guys' help. I need you guys help." >> Actually, me out. I'm out. [laughter] I said they're they're intrigued now. Nobody's fighting to pretend to pull out their wallets, >> right? >> Everyone's just nervously putting their wallets away. >> Yeah. They're all just They're all sitting back down. >> Sitting back down and just being like, "Okay, what is it?" Then I explained this situation. I'm like, you know, I started up this thing. It's 529. People are really curious and also really impressed because nobody's heard of this ████ The whole family basically, right? And then uh I explain this thing and then the oldest sister, Nita's oldest sister there, you know, she's like she's really funny. She's bantering back and forth. she's very extrovert and then we just kind of get into this little flow where she's like I don't remember exact wording but something like oh you know it's like it's really good that you blah blah blah blah but like in a really jokey way so I was like meeting
2:31 reciprocating that energy and be like well you know like our our parents didn't really like set this up for us so I just wanted my blah blah >> got it I just kind of threw that but it was like me and her conversation she's she's older than me you know it was just >> it was just banter but then you know I I just didn't realize at the time obviously my mother-in-law catches wind of this [snorts] >> and then she sitting there too. >> Yeah, she's sitting there at the table and then she like kind of she kind of like starts going off on me in a very loving but like you know like the energy just changes at the whole table. She's like she's like you know we tried our best like all of us we came here with the >> Oh, she took it personal. >> Yeah. And it just went to that space and even in the first 10 seconds I was so thrown off that I was like like my first reaction was like oh no that's not what I meant but it's too late >> at that point. It's just a like, oh dude, like I can see she's holding back tears at this table with the rest of her family. She's trying to like
3:21 >> she's proud of the situation. She's happy her granddaughter's experiencing this, but she's also like >> she's maybe frustrated with the maybe the way that we're seeing how we were maybe being raised with the opportunities that they've like had to go through and we didn't understand it. And it felt like even though like I've granted I've known her for like 10 years and I've been around but like even though like it's still I'm still kind of the newest in the family. It felt like I didn't see anything that she had like contributed like her sacrifice and I felt so like >> oh I felt so bad but there's nothing you could do. There's no there's no defense. >> You smoked >> wait finish let her finish it out acknowledge it as a respectful person and be like oh I understand like that's it. It's not even like sorry. >> It's just like I like oh yeah I understand like you know just take it and I felt so ████ bad. >> You got to buy her Birkin now. >> But you could next time tell her that how much you appreciate her and the
4:11 specifics that she did. >> 100%. But you know with Asian parents >> terrible if after he ████ fumbled like that. >> Sometimes you got to take the L. Yeah next time. >> Yeah. That's all it is. You know >> otherwise you're just sucking up after that. >> And then after you asked her to contribute to the 520 [laughter] That's crazy. >> Here's your chance to not ████ up again. >> Hey, I slept I left it on the table, you know. And [snorts] wait, that's really cool that you you the 529 thing. You asked a family to contribute like her family to convin I think a lot of people will be like I don't think is have you do you guys >> I know it was a contribution family thing. I thought it was just something you do and then you just set it up or whatever. thing is um you can literally when you sign up for it well based off the one that I got I got mine from the Utah my 529 cuz it's better for like taxes and stuff like that >> but um you they give you a gift
5:03 contribution link >> so you could just give that link to whatever and it doesn't expire it's just directly linked to your 529 so for me I'm like hey like >> I mean no offense maybe I'm just simple like this I'm like during Christmas Lana's not going to need any toys that we haven't given her you know or like cared like she's not going to need some like especially from like you know it's not like our parents are more affluent or like capable or have more money or whatever you know during this time. It's like dude just save your stuff but if you want to really contribute to her like dude just contribute to this you know like and and it doesn't need to be ████ 500 bucks like 10 bucks once 10 bucks a month whatever like you have that ability to just >> you want Lana to never work a day in her life. No, I just want to make sure that when it comes to like let's say she wants to do a certain thing for college or education, I don't want to feel like it can't be a possibility because it was
5:53 on me. >> But you know, you got played, right? >> She ████ did all of that so she didn't have to pay or even address it. [laughter] >> This is the long game. >> That's true. >> She won the battle, dude. >> It's like she's like panicking. I don't want to ████ Oh my god, I have so many grandchildren I have to ████ PUT MONEY INTO. ████ YOU. YOU DIDN'T THINK I ████ DID MY BEST. WELL, YOU KNOW HOW it is. It's also it's also the parents that you like will never ever need it or expect it from, right? It's almost like you look at all the like the cousins or the sisters and the brothers and everybody's got kids and we all contribute to each other's things. We show up to each other's first birthday. We show to each other's ████ hund or whatever the ████ thing you celebrate. You contribute to their birthday. They're they're this, they're that. So, it's like when you have your kid, it's like, "All right, ████ >> A $25 tick on me Elmo or whatever the ████ that kid kids get these days." is like, imagine just putting that in a ████ S&P 500,
6:43 >> which I know that's so like seemingly boring and adult, but like when you're talking about a 18-year runway, >> I'm like, dude, that 100 bucks if you give it to her now is huge. >> I can't even tell you guys how many times I got redundant gifts, too, cuz it'll be like Taika's birthday, right? So, everyone goes to the same store. At the store, it's the same trend. So people will come at different times to come visit and you'll have like four of the same exact monster truck. So this solves that problem. It's not as cute or as sexy or whatever, but it's a way more practical way where you don't sit there with like four trucks and you're like >> what do I do? [laughter] >> Okay. So I I think you have to exclude grandparents from this straight up cuz grandparents get off >> on the toy on the actual toy. >> That's what I'm saying. Grandparents could do whatever they want. Yeah. But like they get off on like seeing the kid play with the damn toy that they just
7:33 bought them. So grandparents should be null and void like excluded from this. But aunties and uncles should be should be doing this ████ >> I'm more like this. I've been in that situation where I'm like, "Oh ████ it's their birthday. We got to we got to get to Target right before we're already on the way. We got to stop by Target. We got to get a toy. We got to get a card." I'm more like, "Hey, >> don't don't stress." >> Yeah. >> Just put 10 bucks in the 529. Yeah, but the kid holding a little 529 card doesn't do anything, right? If you're a grandparent doesn't do ████ for them, but the grandparent No, hang on. The grandparent knows that by the time the kid's old enough to access this ████ they're ████ gone. So, they want to experience the now of like little steering wheel and ████ gay little car or whatever. Like, they want to ████ see that. >> You're absolutely right. I'm I'm just giving the option that people can contribute. >> And then, ironically though, people feel
8:24 >> you're depriving people of the joint. No, they're empowered. They feel like they're able to do things that like maybe uh is is quietly helpful. >> Are you speaking for yourself? >> A lot of Asian parents want to do that. They want to quietly help. >> Yeah. More long-term, too. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. So, >> they they they've loved that kind of stuff. >> No, my parents wasn't ████ Asian at all then. >> Just left me with debt. [laughter] >> Wait, they left you with debt? What do you mean? >> They transferred the debt to him. >> I didn't have [laughter] Bro, that's >> Yeah, they transferred it to his name. Yeah, >> you know that's a Chinese. That ain't Asian. That's Chinese. Chinese people be ████ setting up their kids for future things. Like Japanese people don't do that ████ That ████ That's is very Chinese. >> You think Cambodians do that ████ >> No. >> Hell no. >> You think ████ Nope. >> It might be very new age Chinese. >> That's some Chinese ████
9:15 >> You guys take care of each other and think about like investing in You got ████ Filipino family members. I guarantee you they ain't doing that ████ No, but they're sending money home, though. >> Yeah, but they're not buying houses for each other. >> This is Japanese Wait, Japanese tradition is they they don't give a ████ They do the dead thing. >> They ████ make sure you're educated by beating your ass, but they don't they don't set you up like that. >> Oh, ████ >> Like, Chinese people ████ set each other up, dude. They like pull money and like they do all >> Japanese culture is right before you die, you rack up as much debt as possible >> and you ████ die. >> Pass it on. Yeah. Chenny, do you during your set, do you disrespect your parents? >> Um, I preface it first and then disrespect. >> How do you preface it? >> I preface it um by saying that um I I am very grateful for everything that uh my father and mother did, but that doesn't
10:06 mean that I it's not okay to complain. Two things could be true at once. Like I'm very very grateful, but also um here's the things that uh I I don't find pleasant when I experienced it. That's so nice. >> Are you softening the blow? Because then you're going to disrespect your parents. >> It's not crazy. It's just some normal ████ Yeah. But that's true, too. How I feel. >> Do you feel like you're disrespecting your parents though? Cuz you know how they get >> 100%. If they if they if they heard it, they have heard it. >> But but it's like 2 minutes of it though. But it's also the truth though. >> It's a disrespect. They don't know. They won't forget that ████ >> No, they don't. >> No. When Jason's parents came to a show, he didn't do his dad jokes. >> I knew it. >> [laughter] >> Do >> you think he Jason changed the ████ >> I told him I was like, "Bro, do the jokes." DJ was like, "Yeah, >> go hand go hand." >> Roast his ass. >> Let go. [laughter] >> Hey, you want to eat this real quick cuz you
10:56 >> Yeah. You eating the L big time. >> Puss puss. >> I couldn't do it. Not in front of them. >> So, that's what kind of what I'm getting at here is all the time on this show, we kind of disrespect our folks. >> Yeah. A little bit. >> Talk about like ████ that went on growing up. >> The only one that's allowed to. [laughter] I really hope my mother-in-law is not watching this. >> But I go I go extra hard when my parents are around though. So when my mom when my mom was staying like with with us, like me, Taika, J, my mom were in the kitchen, like we're like, you know, cooking food or whatever. I'll pull out like a spatula. I'm like, "Hey, Ta, you know why this is your grandma's favorite?" And you see my mom just turned ████ bright red cuz she knows I'm going to start going into like child abuse stories or whatever. I'm like, "You should ask grandma about this." [laughter] >> And then you see these chopsticks, this whole bundle of chopsticks. Remember I told you I was tap dancing and then my mom threw ████ daggers at me. >> I wonder what these chops are for. And I
11:46 would just I would just go keep going in and I would just see my mom go, "I'm [snorts] gonna kill you." >> And if grandpa was here, there's a chair. It's weird how he used to throw this at my legs. [laughter] >> Well, I was running away by the way. What a good aim. >> You know what this house? [laughter] >> Boy can't wait to slam dunk. So yeah, we often um I feel like if objectively our parents were watching this, they'd be like, "This is disrespectful." But we're just also talking about our lives. >> Yeah, for sure. >> But also, I think one thing that I am doing now is that I am actively trying to repair it with my mom, too. >> And it and it's cool that she's reciprocating cuz she's not the she's not the everything under the heavenly skies. Your parents are never wrong anymore. >> How are you doing that? So we work out like we try to work out instance by instance cuz she has like a we have a
12:36 cat catalog of memories that we'll just talk about and then we have way completely different perspective of how it happened >> and we're trying to unlock things to cuz then we'll talk about something in text and it'll trigger me or trigger her and it becomes a huge thing and it's like oh it's because during this time this wasn't settled and now this just kind of like triggered that thing. So we're trying to go back in time and try to fix >> the understanding between us two. >> I love I I feel like I'm good with my mom, but I don't think I need couples therapy with her, bro. >> I do need it. >> Yeah. >> I just accepted that my mom is ████ >> And that's when I can love her more. >> Okay. >> Accepting >> context. >> I mean, it's like it's almost as if like if you had a down syndrome son, but you're treating them like they're not, right? And then they do all these things and then you're just like, I don't know
13:26 what's wrong with you. He starts picking up a car one day and you're like, >> you're super you're I don't know what's wrong with you. Right. >> But that but then if you you're educated, you know what the symptom is and you know what's going on, then you just go, "Oh, he's a baby." >> Yeah. >> Right. But then like I think when you look at your parents, you just want them to lead. You want them to be responsible. You want them to have ████ under control. And then >> just wanted to be human. >> Yeah. And then you realize, god, like ████ you're kind of ████ I'm just kind of mad cuz like we grew up with so much ████ around us. Like so much trash around us and like just horror ████ that nine days ago I'm talking to my mom on the phone and she's like, "Oh, Stephen, I just have so much ████ around me. There's so much s███." And I'm like, "Yeah, and you ████ wanted that ████ You wanted that ████ So you got to live in that ████ Oh, Stephen,
14:17 come on. S███." I'm like, "No, seriously." Like this is like you built this little ████ ████ palace for yourself. >> But it feels good to get off your chest after holding it for like 30 something years. >> It does. >> Yeah. >> But then she found my Pokemon cards. So she's kind of a genius. >> Hell, dude. [laughter] You came up big >> Venusaur. It's coming home, boy. >> See what happens when you stand up to your mom, dude. [laughter] >> Pokemon card. >> First edition Venusaur is coming home, boys. >> Let's go. We're re baby.
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