0:02 all my friends saw me like fly in the air somersault and then I landed you didn't remember that you didn't no no that I only saw two headlights and I landed with my ear out like this so that's why I was hanging out hanging then I went to the hospital and then uh there was a cigarette in my jacket my mom was coming and I was like oh my God [Laughter] [Music] so off camera we were talking a little bit about how growing up in the late 90s early 2000s as an Asian youth was sort of synonymous with Asian gangster lifestyle well so so so what I noticed was like when we're the more we talk right I'm like Ellen I'm like you're probably our age because the stuff that you're talking about the
0:53 references that you make I'm just like you remind me of girls I grew up with and then and then we find out I'm like yeah you are you are similar to us in age but then also you grew up in NorCal which is miles away but at the same time it's like I was like how is this happening when everyone that grew up in the same era if you're from the same class if you're from like like meaning like social status right like you're not from a rich neighborhood or you're not you didn't grow up a certain way it's like all of us remember a violent kind of world every day was a fight it was crazy and then that's like it's because earlier we talked about how like you know rappers are dying on whatever whatever but like right now it feels safer for me like I feel safer yeah the same cafes and the places that I go to now it doesn't feel like how it used to
1:43 be because um yeah we would be eating dinner after like like a club or whatever and all of a sudden a fight will break out every 10 minutes and then the shooting you have to go home or whatever right and then even though you're from San Francisco area it's the same thing and when I talk to other people our age whether it's Chicago New York Texas they all remember the same stuff and I'm like that's kind of mind-blowing because back then there wasn't like oh why is it parallel yeah how was this happening simultaneously all over different communities yeah that's interesting I mean also rap back then was different too I remember it was like more Tupac and Biggie I I don't know music was different maybe that was just the culture the culture the culture surrounding it yeah and uh so when we're off camera I was he was saying Rumble and I was like thank you sir thank you
2:33 because yeah Rumble though even the term Rumble like David so you made fun of me years later that's true because and it's a real way what did he make you feel like West Side Story or he was like yes like what what the are you Rumble oh like I think you referenced West Side Story he was like how old are you but that's how that was a common thing yeah we're like we're like um I feel like it started in our brother's generation or whatever where they would just meet up with like 40 people on each side and just at the park they would just go at it I never saw a single one-on-one fight growing up really no it would always be like big ass you would think they would start as one-on-ones though sometimes they started as one of them oh this one started one-on-one there's never two people just like alone I don't know I
3:24 never see people go all right let them handle that's another thing too I realized that when people fight they don't really fight when it's they're just by themselves like like okay like in school like uh if you see your your arch nemesis in the restroom whatever you wouldn't just fight them by yourself you wait to like it's like the the it's between classes there's a crowd maybe so there's like uh so there's evidence maybe you don't ever fight them by as long as you see them just just you don't even say Yeah you know I don't know what that's about we used to talk about how like I distinctly remember in the early 2000s that I couldn't go anywhere without someone trying to with me for no reason yes yes that's so true kick it with people to make sure I didn't get jumped but that's why a lot of people join games shopping were my friends because I have to because I would be the quietest one but they always knew me as a dancer girl
4:15 so I was always cool oh you dance you dance so dancing wasn't like today like choreographer viral no no no you dance like oh that Asian girl can dance like don't mess with her yeah and that was that girl of every because different circles yeah yeah I'm cool but then dances have that power yes man I had to kick it with all the girls were like slicing their arms oh my god dude you got the cigarette burn the cigarettes the lighter the little lighter smile the little yeah two or three they would be jumping girls right there all like outright outside the school that had to be their friends because I would be the one that can be you know yeah yeah I remember that like and that's why you saw Asians 40 deep sometimes yeah you remember like they would be hanging out with like 50 people at the bowling alley group because they all like they're like
5:06 a army of ants that has to protect themselves and yeah and I saw this all the time and then like you'll see like 50 and 10 is going to the Park [Laughter] like I got hit by a car got money from that butt Integra well you got a settlement from that full circle fish small I mean give people that story give people the story yeah yeah what happened what happened so this was in Middle School and it was my friend finding my friend um and they started first only then two but it was two crowds so my friend she has the mix crowd so that's like all different races okay and then the other one had the Asian one um so they start going and it just got big and I just remember trying to pull
5:57 off people and blah blah and then you got the Vietnamese gang coming with the bats and that was real like we're like oh we don't have bats so we're like we gotta and guys so we all book it from the rumble um and I'm booking it and then me and my friend Diana were going first and my group of friends behind me and then all I remember was uh waking up on the bottom of the hill and then I like got up and I was like seeing blood I was like yeah oh and then like my one shoe is down the block even more hit by a car all I saw was two headlights all of a sudden all black black so I was like man like I'm pretty sure when this happens and you die like you don't really feel nothing because I didn't feel anything it was just black
6:47 two headlights and then all my friends saw me like fly in the air somersault and then I landed you didn't remember that you didn't no I know that I only saw two headlights and I landed with my ear out like this so that's why I was hanging out hanging then I went to the hospital and then uh there was a cigarette in my jacket my mom was coming and I was like oh my God [Laughter] [Music] my face was like a pancake like it was this big like can you explain to your parents what the happened to your ear I don't even know I was just caring about the cigarette my mom walked and I was like telling my friend like put the
7:38 sticker in the garbage can but she like fainted I was like thank goodness put it in the garbage your mom faints thank goodness you're like oh okay you can't find out yeah I don't know what I told her but I just remember I didn't go to school for two weeks because my face was like oh damn but I was that's crazy I do remember like every day going out there was a bit of fear of something myself someone said something's gonna happen today well I'm gonna somebody up or my friend's gonna be an idiot yeah and then you're just there and you're you're trying to have a wholesome time bowling with your friends eat some food and somebody stabs you and you're like why it would always be Japan
8:29 Town SF by the bowl Jay Bowl gotta kick it my uncle lived down there oh dude I guarantee you I probably crossed like one of these yeah I would be the one out there like this smoking no oh my god do you have pictures of yourself in that Persona yeah I literally let's go it's funny because Christian looks at me right now she's like I can't relate I'm so sorry and then she's like do you relate and I was like I really in a different way I also was scared every day so instead I went to the science room and played Magic the Gathering during lunch avoid the gangsters so you are a part of it you were a part of it but you stayed away from it yeah this is good I was I was like nerdy and Pudgy enough where I was no threat to either side good that's good I feel like everybody was fine with me it was just my cousin
9:20 who was annoying to them so anytime my cousin got beef I had to be in it but then that's when we got an imaginative Gathering because nobody could take away our love for cards I think that's good though but you know what you know what's the bad part about about trying to hide in a space like that so that's what we did with Counter-Strike and then gangster started playing Counter-Strike I know and gangsters ruined it for everyone that's true because I did have to be in the PC bang and so you're in a room it's like a computer Cafe right there's like 30 computers everybody's playing Counter-Strike on a land so you're shooting people that are also in the room if you killed the wrong guy he stands up and he goes who the is that who shot me and you're just like it came to the point where certain people came they would be shootouts because of because they ultimately closed them because of a murder over a country oh wow Garden Grove a guy got stabbed with a pen was it Vietnamese again yeah I have a buddy who
10:14 um was playing Counter-Strike and then um people called in that those guys were there so then they weren't there to play Counter-Strike and shoot them they were there to kill him so then once he got once he saw them he was like holy right he jumped out got into his car as he was driving away they they went through the back and they shot and then he got so lucky because it hit the corner you know where the metal part is in the corner if the bullet hit that first and it got lodged to the back of his head and it melted right there and it stopped before going through what the so he just has a bump right here at the back of his head but they couldn't surgically pull it out because it created like a like a crack in a hole that well see that's the thing with what you were saying with how you have to roll in groups because the amount of times I can't even count when I was by myself and someone would just go where you from and I would have to go nowhere
11:05 oh my god dude like I'm from nowhere and that's just here in San Gabriel like how much more of you in somewhere farther away where they don't know you and then because it's harder for me because I didn't look nerdy but I looked like I was trying to be cool so they'd be like oh who the are you yeah nobody oh it's fine I would have to lie about that too sometimes because like back in the day Fullerton and Cerritos for some reason always had the biggest beef but I would go to I went to Sunny house in Fullerton but my parents live in Border Park so you know I'd be at Cerritos Town Center from time to time and these fools why people always come up be like where you from and I'm not gonna say I'm going to Sunny Hills that sounds bad it all sounds like I'm like I'm from Buena Park I live I'm not in La Palma they're like all right would you be by yourself huh would you
11:56 be by yourself I'd be like with my cousins and stuff like that just be stupid we just look like nerds you know what I mean like you're just but you just happen to be Asians yeah in a spot that somebody deems their territory it was just so Regional back then did it feel like back then is it none of this accurate I don't feel like I ever got with by black dudes white dudes it was only only Asians only other Asians for sure I didn't really get that much yeah it depends because I mean gang stuff was happening everywhere but I think if you hung out in only Asian areas that's who's gonna that's true too I like the Mexican dudes at my school and stuff they just call you Chino and you're cool they look equally against it but they just were cool and nice about it I looked Mexican so they were cool with me I just went with being funny bro like just being funny being like uh like all whatever Clique whatever Hood whatever whoever was like like the toughest like whoever
12:47 was like a like a bull I'll try to just be like cool with them like be funny to where he'll be like oh he thought he's cool don't feel like he's all right he's all right that's why all right cool I'm on I'm on I'm on everybody's good side that's what that's how I was like that was my defense mechanism you're like you want notes from class man I got notes from class yeah yeah like I would I would like uh like yeah in the classroom if there was like one of those like hard fools in the class whatever I would just be funny I could like I could take that L you know I mean if like you know get sent out to class whatever whatever but as long as nobody's with me that's like all right I'm cool you know what I mean you know what I realized like some of um my friends that didn't end up in this stuff they like they did skating extreme sports like surfing and I feel like there's a lot of like excitement that young men have that with their aggression and they need an outlet they
13:38 need something they need an activity yeah yeah the white kids have like the like that's like you can relate no no no no camera on me so uh I was involved in many activities in high school but they have they have like something that that's that's adrenaline because I think a lot of the stuff that we were chasing was adrenaline yeah a lot of it was like excitement doing crazy that's why like I'm I'm quick to admit that like as much as I got into I willingly walked into it because I thought it was fun but I didn't want I just didn't want to die but I wanted to almost die yeah I was like this is kind of tight it's thrilling but it but also once you you also weren't on the same page with your group sometimes like we would go to a party like we went to a party in Carson one time and then as soon as we got there the other guys were like Hey
14:29 we're gonna steal this DJ's equipment oh no [Laughter] he's like don't get the point of all right my song request is next like damn it I'm like what's the point of you know getting ready looking cool and then like we go to House parties and the first thing you guys want to do is fight other men I'm like I'm there I want to talk to girls I want to like meet women and you want to do the most gayest thing on earth you just want to go in and just fight other men all day long and I'm like that's Rumble [Laughter] why am I doing my hair that's what I felt I was like why am I even getting ready why but that's why people didn't
15:20 realize that those dudes were the influencers of our day like those were the influencers like they were the guys calling all the shots that you just along for the ride and you're like I think well they made a game out of like at least in LA right like kids Grand Theft Auto they made it they made a game out of fighting Chinatown worse like they they literally made a game out of fighting because like a lot of the times it wasn't even drug like territory money driven it was just because you wanted to be the baddest gang so you wanted everyone to know your name so you're gonna do the most violent fight each other and then that's why we had the culture of gang banging where it's like um it's called hitting people up but you see a group of guys that look thuggish and then you you ask them where they're from and if they say the gang that uh is a rival then you gotta go at it right so that was a com that's why Asians with Asians a lot because they cared
16:12 about like oh this is my game I like this Asian boy this is whatever right and then so they wanted to be the biggest name and then they created rivalries because they would get into senseless fights but none of it was like a sophisticated like yo this is my drug territory like the Mexicans had like oh this is our territory we're selling here you can't sell in here and it's like it was just pointless stupid streets just Pride stupid yeah it was Pride but I think it's because young men had so like these juveniles had so much energy and aggression they're all we're all getting our asses beat at the house that's another thing too oh it's true at home you again oh yeah so it's like where do you where do you take that out you're just taking it all in like kinetic energies yeah like black panther I always say dance truly saved my life because I was kicking it with wild
17:02 people one because I don't want to get my ass whooped and also I was getting beat in the house so the only thing that I can go to that I can look at that dance floor was that's why when people ask me why am I so great aggressive with my dancing is like that's why I am so aggressive I had so much to say but I could never say it because I was always crumping but she's yeah oh but then that's what people always say like you know why do you dance so aggressive and they think it's just like a dance thing and I'm like it's so like it's because of the way I grew up it's where I grew up and how you this was a civil rights movement style built on oppression is that what it is no I was gonna say it's it's just yeah I don't know it's experience like it yeah yeah like my dance style it's the outlet yeah it's an outlet if you
17:53 don't have an outlet then you're gonna stay in that and do stupid stuff do dumb so I'd rather go dance and then dance for me was like ah it was so fun it was crazy in that that too I had to take the BART 12th Street Oakland and it's like my mentors are like what the kind of just expressed and you're still you're still getting the feeling of being a part of a game you're a part of a crew you gotta prove so and then you have a leader whatever and you're doing something tight it don't hurt you know what I'm saying we're not fighting you know what I'm saying like they do like hugs yeah you know what I mean you call Tech freestyle okay it wasn't hugs in my mind was like you gotta pull up because you are like Asian like you gotta pull up because you I might see you even being raw like you don't know what this is so I'm like
18:49 [Music] and then I went to um called Shock Oakland oh and then after that with Kim was it Kim's and then uh did you have one after that wait Kim's my mentor like oh okay now I get it like yes Dominique I used to know her when she was five um oh gee hell yeah yeah so she's the one that would yell at me what is that that what is this that's a good person to guide you though she's a strong Yeller yeah so that's how I grew up hell yeah and that's what I'm saying like I get what you're saying about getting into extreme sports I needed that energy
19:39 because I yeah anyway did you eventually get into dance did you have to jump out no you know what I did is um I slowly convinced more than half of the people to leave at the same time so then who's gonna jump us out that's that's pretty smart yup there we go [Music]
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