0:00 Man, you guys are all married and stuff. >> Mhm. >> I don't know really. I don't know many many many [laughter] >> You don't know a lot of married people. >> I don't know many married people. And I was thinking, can you guys give me some marriage advice? [laughter] >> Wait, are you with are you even with a girl? Cuz you got to start there first. >> Oh, okay. I am actually I'm dating someone. >> Oh, that's a start. >> Hey, how long? >> 3 months. >> Oh, okay. Okay. >> You going to marry her? >> Huh? Huh? Do you do you feel like it's a reality? >> Yeah. Is there like marriage potential? Like a little bit of >> or you just feel like digmatized? She's >> No, this is the first girl that I like. >> Okay. >> Oh, first one. >> You usually date girls you don't like. >> I mean, it's like let's just have let's just enjoy our time. You know what I mean? >> Yeah, [laughter] I know. I know what you mean. >> Just enjoy our time, >> you know? But this one I'm like >> that's like hakuna mata and then you're like I don't know if it's going to go
0:50 farther than this. >> What does that hakuna mat? What does that mean? >> It means like it means like >> Yeah. Saki saki. >> Oh, I see. Sucky sucky. Let's be lucky. >> Sucky. [laughter] [gasps] >> So yeah, she's Filipino white, but >> Oh. >> Oh, I got you, brother. >> Yeah, [laughter] >> that's that's his language. >> My chick. >> Oh, >> that's his language right there. >> Yeah, dude. >> Perfect. >> Her name's Nikki. >> Under what conditions did you guys get together? >> She's I met her at a comedy show in Minneapolis. >> She was sitting in the back >> and then um I went to go set up a camera on the table and I was like, "Can I put my camera here?" And then we just talked for a bit and then after the show she was still sitting there and then I asked her to get drinks and then >> That's so cool. >> she was down and then >> damn you play. >> Yeah. I got to ri a little bit RZ. >> Yeah. So [laughter] you got the first stage down. >> Were you super cool about it and you're
1:41 like please please have a DRINK WITH ME. PLEASE HAVE A ████ DRINK WITH ME. >> I WAS ON MY KNEES. I'M KILL MYSELF. [laughter] >> Good strategy. Next stage this is a big stage. Okay. is moving in together. [snorts] >> Well, technically a lot of people, you know, conservatively get married and then move in together. >> I know. I know. But then like you got you moved in before marriage. >> You moved in before you moved in before you >> Everybody doesn't know. >> I think it's actually a good move. >> I think so, too. >> Cuz you need to know how she s████, bro. >> Yeah, cuz that's a big one. >> You need to fart around her. >> Is she going to fart around you? >> You need to see how she does operates. >> So, fart first. >> Don't fart. Ask. You got to ask. Don't fart. Don't do it. Don't destroy. >> You got to ask rules of engagement. >> That's kind of weird though, right? >> No, you Hey, you know, do you like do you think farts are funny? You just ask her that and see what she says. >> Good start.
2:31 >> Oh, >> that way it's a little more casual. It's not like, can I fart around you? >> We pee in front of each other. >> That's dope. >> We pee in front of each other. >> That's cool. That's true. That's true. >> That's That's good. >> In the first three months, that's pretty fast. >> I'm like, do you want to see me pee? I'm on FaceTime. You want to see me pee? >> Yeah. What' you say? And she likes it. >> Like, no. I'm like, I'm peeing right now. >> Yeah. Okay, [laughter] that's good. That's fun. >> Oh, so you're just like in the digital vibes with each other. You're not like showing each other your actual urine streams, right? >> No. >> Hey, so like >> cuz I was like first three months that is fast. Yeah. Long long distance is is is pretty difficult though. >> Yeah. >> So then like you got to at one point be like, "Hey baby, you want to stay longer >> and have her move to me?" >> Yeah. >> Wait, where'd she live? >> Minneapolis. >> Yeah. Jesus, dude. >> I know. >> No, me and AB is pretty cool. >> No, I know. But you're not there, right?
3:22 Oh, >> you're not going to be there. >> A tough flight. >> You guys got to figure that part out if it goes that far. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. We saw each other four times in 3 month. Like we I spent like a week there. >> Are you guys splooy? >> Oh, cool. >> Mhm. >> Are you guys? >> I asked her to be I we were like I spent a week in Minneapolis and then I got like Airbnb up by this lake thing. >> Oh wow. >> Hell yeah. >> You're romantic. >> I know. I'm very >> You're trying to fill her up full of ████ huh? [laughter] >> Yeah. Don't leave it in yet. Okay. >> I know what those Airbnbs mean when you do. Was that Lake Minnetonka or what? >> We're in Duth. It was Lake Superior. >> Whoa. It's a beautiful lake. >> All right. Stage one, dude. >> I [snorts] think you should kind of move in together. And >> at [laughter] 3 months at 3 months. Yeah. You guys should you guys should >> Well, how old are you? If you really like each other. >> Yeah. >> I think before stage one, maybe stage half. Uh before you do that, you
4:12 probably got to meet each other's family >> and her mom. >> Some people are crazy. Some people's families are crazy. And that's going to be your relationship. What's her What's her family like? Her mom's cool. >> Her mom is Filipino. She's like um very sweet, bigger woman. Very motherly vibe. >> That's dope. >> Yeah. She's she's meeting my parents. [gasps] >> Oh, she's meeting your parents >> on July 4th. >> Oh, that's awesome. >> Who are you more scared of her meeting, your mom or your dad? >> My mom. >> Really? >> Is your mom judging? >> Yeah. Low key. High key. Yeah. Do you think she's going to go black? Was okay, but Filipino? >> Why you down gray, man? [laughter] >> Oh, but she half white though. >> Oh, mix. >> What kind of way? >> Scottish. >> Oh, >> you think you think your dad is going to give you props? Like, damn, man. You got her ████ >> You pull out, you know. [laughter]
5:04 >> Yeah. I I asked her to be my girlfriend. That's like two weeks ago. >> So, it's official. >> Yeah. >> Okay. I like that. [applause] >> Okay. >> He's locked down officially. >> Yeah. family meeting family. So, her family is cool so far. >> Yeah. >> And now she's we're going to see if she likes her family. >> Are you going to tell your mom like, "Hey, can you chill the ████ out?" actually >> or you can't do that. You don't have the relationship with her. >> No, I think I can tell her, but she's like she's she kind of knows already. But, >> okay. >> She met my brother's girlfriend and that that was fine. So, I'm like you're at least you had a pre a pre thing. >> Is there something about your chick that you're worried when it comes to your mom? >> Like like she's on, you know, just on probation or anything? the ankle monitor. >> Do you think you could do long distance like like overseas? >> I did. >> Overseas? [laughter] >> I did. You did? You did? >> For how long? >> Not long. And we got married in like less than two years
5:54 >> cuz she wants to go to the Philippines to teach at a school. That's like one of her dreams to like on her bucket list. >> You're toast. [laughter] >> Got it. >> It's been real, dude. >> Unless you go with her. Yeah, cuz that's a commitment cuz she's going to be there for what, like a year, two years. That's how long those programs are, right? >> You smoke, my brother. is is GG. >> No, I think you're you're already in a long distance like >> and you already travel a lot for your work. He's not going to travel to the Philippines. >> If it's like a year, I think there's you know I think if you guys are both down if you guys are both down cuz it's going to be hard. >> He saw her three times in 4 months. Like >> this this is what I think the further away it is, the more the harder it is. >> But it can be fixed with more intention. So if you guys could figure out a way to see each other once a month for those 12 years, I mean those 12 months, I think it's doable. Bro, isn't this ████ going to be calling you like 5 in the morning and ████ >> Yeah. Wait, what mean once a month?
6:44 That's a That's a lot. Five to the Philippines, once a month. >> I I don't know. I would if to make to keep the relation. >> Realistically, it's like every like 3 months, right? Like once a quarter somebody goes there, the next quarter she goes there, >> but they stay for long times like a like you stay for like a month or more. >> But I'm I'm going to need I'm talking about for me, I'm going to need at least once a month because I'mma forget who you are. [laughter] >> That's that's the hard part. That's the other hard >> for international. That's so impractical. >> Also, it won't work for me if we can't do that. >> Ah, [sighs] >> I could go away for a trip and I come back and I lost feelings for my dog. >> By the way, you're 3 months in. This is like supposed to be the magical time of your relationship. And you're like, "Hey, deuces out to ████ Philippines." >> Yeah, this is the building. When is she going to the Philippines? >> Like um October or something like that. >> Oh, this year. >> Oh ████ >> Looks like you got an expiration date, my friend. I mean, dude, Steve is like, >> if she is born and raised in the States,
7:35 she's going to at one point she's going to be like, I can't handle this ████ I need to go back to air conditioning. >> They got air conditioning, brother. [laughter] >> I need to go back to McDonald's >> where they have roads. >> Roads? >> Yeah. >> You don't think she's going to be like, "Oh, and I need to go back to hamburgers." >> Probably. I mean, yeah. I don't know. Like >> Oh, wait. They got Jollibee over there. What? No. They only have water. >> McDonald's over there, too. >> The way So, we The way we made it work was uh like she could stay for like 3 months. So, we stay for like 2 months. She go back for like a month. >> But she's teaching there. She ain't going nowhere. >> Summer break. You could hang out summer break. >> Well, no. There's There's no need for summer break. She's only there for a year. >> She's going in October. There's no summer [laughter] break. She's skipping
8:25 right through. >> There's no summer for a year. >> Yeah. Then you go visit her. >> Have you been to the Philippines? >> I want to go. No, I never been. >> Honestly, you know what? I wouldn't Well, this is me cuz >> it's a long travel day. >> I would I would number one not be like, "Oh, dude, you're going to the Philippines for years. Done." >> If you're into her, if anything, dude, that's a sick excuse to go to the Philippines. Some people go to the Philippines just to check it out. You're going to go there. You're probably going to get laid, too, my guy. Like, >> and it's not a Filipino hooker. It's someone you love. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. You so you love her. >> No, that you will that we that you will love >> you will pepper >> eventually. >> But like No, honestly like that that seems like a sick trip. Have that first. Just have some fun. >> But I need money. >> No, I can't. >> But it's cheap there. >> No, you go once a month. Easy style.
9:15 >> Flights are cheap, dude. [laughter] >> Why don't you book a Asia tour? >> Actually, I'm doing that with Jason. >> See, that's one month. What about the next month? >> That's what I'm saying. >> That's one month. Yeah. There's a lot of friction in this relationship. >> There's a lot of friction. >> Hey man, when you put your mind to it, you can make anything happen. >> That's true, too. >> You don't have to commit to the marriage. You can just commit to the >> my captain. My captain. >> It's when it's fun, stay there. When it stops being fun, that's when you stop. >> And the fun don't stop. If she makes you pop, that's >> my captain. My captain. Once again, >> this is why you're my leader. [laughter] She makes you pop. If she's giving you top, >> if you if you think about it this way, >> that's good. That's just a fact. It looks real hot when she >> is. Her contract is only teaching for a year. >> No. >> And you flop. >> If you guys going to be together for the next 50 years, what's one year? >> That's what I said to her.
10:05 >> That's Oh, you romantic ████ [laughter] >> The first year is a big one. >> It's a huge one. >> Big like when Bart said, it's a building. >> It's like it's like saying, "Yeah, you're going to have the tree for a hundred years. Who gives a ████ about the seeds? >> Who gives a ████ WHERE YOU PLANT IT?" >> OKAY, YOU GUYS ARE NOT GIVING THEM MARRIAGE ADVICE. YOU'RE TELLING HIM TO LEAVE this relationship? >> We're giving him good advice actually >> cuz we're giving him marriage advice. It's just it might not be this chick that fits into this track. >> She's not maybe marriage material if this is how it starts. >> Yeah. I'm literally saying I don't think you should break up with her because >> see what happens. >> All right. Now, >> THIS WHOLE TIME THESE GUYS ARE TRYING TO CONVINCE him to leave. >> Yeah. >> No, I said visit her once a month. You're giving them player advice. This is ████ marriage advice. She's trying to teach ch school children in the Philippines. I think that's a catch. She ain't going out there being a passport bro sucking all kinds of dick. >> Very true.
10:55 >> That's true. >> All right. >> I think she's a catch, but you got to go see her once a month. >> If she was like, I'm going to Portugal. I would be worried. >> Once a month is kind of crazy, though. >> Also, I don't think she would verbally like imagine her verbally admitting that she's going to go over there and suck a bunch of dick for passport bro stuff. Like, I don't think she would say it. >> But Philippines isn't usually the country. I'd be worried if it was like Colombia or Portugal or something. >> I just think about your regular contact with her, right? >> Just different time zones. It's going to be all ████ I just don't know how you maintain that. >> You just need a lot of intention. >> Yeah. You got to be on top. >> You have to love this ████ >> Especially when you're traveling. >> That's the other thing, too. >> Cuz when you're traveling, your time zone's constantly changing and it's already doesn't match with hers. >> So, you just have to be on top of it. You spend as much time as you can with her until October. Then you make the decision. >> That's a great idea. >> That's kind of what the vibe is now. We're going to see each other and make >> He's kind of got to figure it out, you guys. >> And then if you if if it grows, then you
11:45 propose right before that ████ And then you ████ get her pregnant so she can never leave. >> [laughter] >> called anchor baby. >> Oh, okay. A quick pregnancy thing. Yeah. >> She goes, "Oh, I'm pregnant now. I can't go to Philippines." >> Sick. >> I thought we're doing marriage advice. >> Get her stuck. >> A couple different [laughter] plans. Yeah. >> How'd you know? Yeah. ████ So, I guess we'll see. >> I don't know, guys. This whole I think we all ████ up giving marriage advice, but maybe you guys have something really good that you can give Will in the comments below. >> I got one real quick. Know when to take the L and stop arguing and being stubborn ████ and just take the ████ L. cuz we constantly as boys we just try we just keep digging sometimes and it's like damn I'm not going anywhere with this hole dude. >> Yeah. You want to have a bad day? Let her win, bro. >> Let her win. That's a good one. That's a good That's >> Let her eat the dub, dude. >> Yeah. >> Let her eat. >> I don't think I learned anything this past 15 minutes. [laughter]
12:36 He's like, I know less
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