0:00 they go to Every Fu aisle and they take forever and then they go to the makeup aisle which is the real time SN that's like when you're on that planet in in interstellar oh yeah and you kind like it's been 34 years the clock goes like that the minute she turns into theing makeup store it's welcome back to careful boys today we're talking about do our chicks and wives have more fun without us nope so fast I don't that's a good question actually I'm extremely fun you don't think Gio has any fun like by herself well she's number one an introvert oh and then number two we're each other's best friends so if we're not doing things together gay it's not super gay
0:52 it's not as fun unless we're both there yeah and it's gay but I know like when Tiff she when I'm at J car working she likes to go to uh like vintage sales and stuff like that and she likes to go to like dead people's houses when they're selling all their stuff damn the state holy ████ the way you better term yeah dude no cuz they usually die they usually die from like natural causes and then they sell their stuff kind of loves that ████ and Tiff pulls up and she's like she tries to get the steal she get good stuff what's the last good ████ bro what's the last thing she got that was pretty tight dude some ████ that girls like I don't know like she likes everything with seashells right now wait has she uh has she ever seen like a scary movie She seven-year-old girl that's what I'm saying she's bringing bad vibes she's like look you hear the ocean in me this is the weapon that they killed her with but look how thick it is it's a
1:43 good dealy it's only $4 Nina does have fun doing the stuff that she knows I don't like doing when I'm not around so for example like Costco on the weekends cuz she can't go to Costco on the weekends I I can go I mean on the weekdays but like Costco on the weekends is like I get ████ anx go on Monday I cannot that's what I can but she can't cuz she got to work Monday through Friday but why don't y'all instacart dud come on that extra cuz half half of the joy is walking down the island aisles thinking about what you wasn't planning on I get mad when I get fruit from like Costco and stuff and I instacart it and they just give me the s████████ fruit sometimes Costco has pretty s█████ fruit yeah that's true they just suck your fruit here it's bruised right you wanted it bruised C was the thing you're trying food you're trying the little snack they got dude they always have new ████ too always
2:33 have new ████ you would go back my girl wants some than you it's like I love Costco dude Costco's the best Costco's fun when there's not that many people in there but that's never never I don't think so because my girl ████ she comes back complaining about how it didn't go the way she thought it was going to go like what like she's always just like oh and then we order like this and then they they bringing it on time and I'm just like oh it sounds like you didn't have a good time no it's fun but you know and I'm like yeah but then when I go somewhere she wants to go can I go oh my God I'll be fine I'm like wait I was going to go by myself but no let's make a thing would you rather go by yourself or you like going with her I love I love going by myself to do a lot of things here's the thing dude and I'm ████ pissed when I go to the beach no like to like beach I'm not going to go to the beach right I'm like hey you know what I'm just going to how about I just go to the beach like by myself because like if I go with you it's going to be a thing what are you going to do what do
3:23 you do at the beach just lay down oh dude check out other high us I'm this guy dud yeah not the best sunglasses F like this I'm just like this I'm why don't you oil that up it's a seethrough sunglasses yeah this got seethrough sunglasses you need someone to get your back oh that guy's being weird like dude so your chick has more fun without you no dude I'm I think so but yeah like there's a lot of cool things to do by yourself at the beach cuz then you have to like and then you sounds funny dude dude by yourself at the beach so you get yourself a cooler right get a little Mexican Coke in there go get a burrito from some place just have it sit there dude let it be in the Sun and just ████ put it there you go for a dip dude and then you come back and you just dry off normally in your burrito with
4:13 your ████ Mexican all sh do your because you know why oh yeah get this oh my god get this hey can you set this up babe there's sand here can you like move that sand and I'm like that's the beach baby baby cakes that's the beach you're going to have some sand here I just oh my God I think I ate sand you're going to have to eat some sand you got that little crunch in your ████ part of it those are rocks that's that's part of the beach that's what we're doing true I don't like can we like that do the can we go to the restaurant and eat then that defeats what I want to do at the beach I want to live like this at the beach she wants to go have a hang out the beach for a little bit wash off and then ████ go have a restaurant and look at the that's true poor people swim yeah dude it's like what the ████ man feels like one of those moments where like she's seeing this and going no you're the one that
5:03 said that we need her side every 5 seconds I got to just ████ dust that thing off put it right there make sure she's fine and then and I ████ uh if I fix something up she's like can you make that for me cuz she I'm like all right and I got to yeah dude it sucks dude yeah the Sun starts like moving and it starts getting in her ████ face bam the thing oh this that you could have done too he ends up being her servant like he has a ████ leaf and he's just Fanning her and ████ but sometimes you want to do ████ by yourself they can't carry ████ you got to carry the ████ in the car it's like all these things that they need you to do and it's like yeah ████ women right the wor when Tiff wants to go like grocery shopping with me I'm like n bro
5:53 for real yeah I go no you stay at home I'm going to go because bro I get in I get what I need and I get out bro like cuz does add better ████ no bro I do all the grocery shopping in the house I do the grocery shopping I don't are you do you do the grocy yeah I go different I do I go different markets so cool man are you doing the cooking what a he's sick well he's apron my wife is the bread winner so I I just take care of the I like going grocery shop with Gio because I'm a robot so she adds flavor in my life cuz I literally just get ground beef chicken whatever and I'm the same exact ████ she like get some you know like chocolate covered pretzels or whatever I'm like oh sh or honey roasted pistachio you got to Loos up bro you got to Loos up yeah dude you're up tight brother I do it I do it both I do it all yeah listen to that dude I just do the
6:43 same ████ all the time and then they add way cooler ████ I'm like oh that you do like 15% of your haul it needs to be fun stuff you see dude it's too strict dude she's probably at midnight going like I want to do something crazy can we go get some like in it out I don't know it's crazy he like are you ████ kidding me it's ████ 1200 a.m. he nuts no dude it's going to do all it's going to go up to here and here all the ████ fat dude ████ that we're taking a protein shake go to sleep Bart Bart would Bart would never be up at 12:00 a.m. dude be sleep i' be sleeping he's been sleep for 6 hours too six hours yeah and how about you I don't go if I go to Target with Nikki it ████ sucks dude it takes so long Target is the worst Target is the worst but it's also the they go to every ████ aisle and they take forever but and then they go to the makeup aisle which is the real time sink that's like when you're on that ████ planet in in
7:34 interstellar oh yeah you come like it's been 34 years once you're in that makeup aisle it's time ████ the clock goes like that any makeup store it's over like you know like downtown some of them we could be walking around with the family it's nice Pace the minute she turns into the ████ makeup store it's dud dude I would suicide SE I would suicide bom Sephora I ████ hate Sephora is tough bro cuz it's like you walk around there's nowhere for you to stand you always feel like you're in the ████ way a lady comes up to you can I help you and I'm like no I'm just with my wife I don't know where she is I'm not gay I swear I'm not gay l so I promise I'm not gay line so long every time we go Nina's always like can you stand in line already and she and I'm just standing there in line with no product and I see another poor bastard walking around aimless like me and I was
8:24 like I was there once the best way to do it is probably like as soon as they go to the makeup store like I'm going just go watch a movie you come at the theater yeah yeah yeah yeah have you ever been in a situation where you're paying for every or you're like putting all the stuff on the conveyor belt at the supermarket and then your girl will go off be like hold on I'm going to grab something else brother and then and then brother it's already ████ done and the guy behind you is like and and you're just like hold on she's kind of sorry it's over no that's I'll tell I'll I'll tell Tiff you got to wait in the back of the line brother that's happened to you this transaction's over and you're just like where the ████ and I'm ████ FaceTiming I'm not even calling I'm like FaceTiming to be like look no that's me cuz I'm I think I'm so inhumanely robotic that the human wants to come out so by the time I get to the conveyor B
9:15 RAB I got to get this R beer oh you do that okay dude and the pieces of ████ the pieces of ████ who are on their FaceTiming at the checkout I'm like I'm like first of all the so on your phone which I can see cuz your phone is like basically a tablet size for some reason and you got the ████ pop thing in the back and and so so the person on the other end is seeing the underside of your chin like this while you're ████ like talking like this and on your end you're seeing like a top of picture frame in their ████ ceiling what's the point of being on FaceTime with this person yeah yeah yeah we can all hear I'm calling her back we hear everything this is off topic but this is just about grocery stores in general whenever I do the self checkout line and I see someone in front of me and there's there's all fil I'm waiting for somebody and I know this person is taking the longest and they're just like
10:05 they've never been in a ████ self checkout before and they're just like oh the self oh dude yeah oh put it down okay um put it down weird dude oh this one okay and I'm like ████ dude you have three items like that's it move it along I'm trying to get a ████ car I'm trying to get I'm trying to get a car lady takes out those little wipes and ████ and she's like wiping the ████ thing down like dude these are all so just take it out take grab the wipes grab the cart and then go wipe it down over there get the ████ out of my okay another one I just got to get this one out I just got to get this one out real quick when there's this the the the the sign that says self checkout line and I'm standing right self checkout line starts here and I'm standing right next to it and the guy walks in front of it yeah and and he's like he turns around and goes oh are you in
10:55 line oh brother [Applause] oh triple murder homicide suicide oh am I in line I was like you know what I could do to you dude I can kiss you right in the mouth right now I'll go to federal prison right now d m ler are you dead I can kiss you on the mouth and there's nothing you could do about it CR CR ████ Captain oh man I feel way better about saying it out loud to everybody thank you woo I should to get off my chest yeah I hate those guys yeah I I so hate the ████ you know what I ████ hate too when you're like counting the items I only have 10 items I'm in this on the right line for the 10 items and then the ████ in front of you is like 20 some deep maybe 50
11:47 deep I was like that's 16 brother I counted oh it's going to be fast though and I'm just like yeah dude it's not no it's not you got seven gift cards Dude you got to ████ tag all those in ████ you man I know you and the ████ employee f I know ████ ████ 18-year-old who's just like doesn't have the balls the tongue I think it's um all right it's all good ████ you dude cuz he already put his stuff down hey once he puts the stuff down they really can't stop you I think it's 18 so now I'm it's all right I'm that guy I don't care dude I'll put 16 items down never seen a single person ever buy a Domino's gift card not one time every Domino's is always stacked stacked to The Brick a brick of it St it's the weirdest gift card you could ever give somebody it's kind of like I hate you Domino's is losing money on those gift cards dominoes and Arby's are always
12:37 ████ stacked it's not worth the plastic those end up in the ocean anyway fandangos Turtles are ████ drowning we're going to get them in straw you know who the who are these people that are so impatient that they can't wait till they leave the store to eat some of the ████ things that they it's open everywhere why you ████ with the chips dude wait until you're in the car my chick does that my chick does that in the store yeah in the store she she'll get like a drink yeah yeah she eats fruit all kinds of ████ yeah she's an animal I'll do that I'll do that at 7eleven out the b I'll only do that at 7-Eleven dude and you know you know when you get Taco Bell and like you want to wait and go home and turn a show on this ████ is eating it in the car immediately and I'm like Ru ruins the
13:27 experience only french fries that with McDonald's fries though only like a couple only a couple but you got to go home and you got to lay the spread out and then you press yes but McDonald's fries but then you got to scroll you got to scroll for a while scroll for like 20 minutes what should we watch but McDonald's fries you don't eat in the first 5 minutes they become a different fries like put in an air fryer they become Carl's junor fries the biggest ████ peeve for me for me the biggest ████ pee is when we come ████ from fast food and we have it there and she wants to ████ go to the let me go to the rest like dude we got to eat now like why are we waiting she'll started quality is going down dude she's having a she's having a conversation with me and I'm like babe are we going to eat and she's just like oh yeah we'll eat we'll eat later and I'm like it's getting ████ cold
14:17 that's the whole point I'm here to eat it anthonye says the fries turn into a different fres I'll take you to the bathroom oh my it's just this is how girls eat on the ████ C doing the food run let them know how much time out I'm like 5 minutes out 3 minutes out tyon you better be at the ████ counter and as soon as I come in and then eat I don't want to come in and then have to Wrangle yes so if I'm already 5 minutes I'm like 5 minutes out 3 minutes out yes 30 seconds your house is so big it takes 15 minutes to get all the way downstairs yeah I get you B dude I'm going to ████ you dude we'll get in and out together yeah D for real dude get F dude God damn by the way this promp is supposed to be by hard chicks have more fun without us but this is actually group therapy group ████ therapy this is boys you hate about your wife guys boys are unloading right now
15:07 dude but I I could tell she's not having fun cuz none of her friends are funny you know her friends aren't funny I mean they're like her type friends sometimes like when when you're not there like great finally he's not cracking jokes about everything listen they're funny dude but they're not like come on you know I mean when I see the jokes I'm like they're cute jokes but how would you feel she had a guy friend that was ████ hilarious here's the thing dude that's all that's good I think and honestly he's fine and he's not even a professional he's just ████ funny social she is around a lot of fun he's not that funny he she just laughs hella hard oh yeah he's not funny but she dies laughing at him he dies cuz she dies cuz he got a huge dick you know how we all laugh around chicks with big old titties I just realiz dude I just realized and uh I just realized she caught on to it and she stopped doing it she'll send me
15:57 videos of like comedians that she thinks are funny and I'm like don't don't don't do that cuz you're just telling me he's got a bigger dick that's what it sounds like to me in my head it sounds like this is the guy I wish I would fck it's Matt R specifically I was so pissed when you sent me a Matt R I'm like dud ever sent me this guy but honestly Matt R is like I don't want to say it's lady humor but it's kind of like for ladies she's like have you seen Gabriel glaus I'm like God ████ kill I'm like yeah I know what he's doing that little ████ she's just like look at his jawline yeah he like he gets that if she sent you like Carl spia and was like look how ████ original guys that oh the guy I'm saying like known joke jackers the guy who she sent me who just made me just be like what the ████ Jason chenny that piece of ████ look at this look at his he looks like he's asleep and awake at the same time what's going on with he does he looks like he's counting for
16:48 something like what math problem are you ████ trying to figure out right now he does look like he's always counting in his head he looks like he forgot to he left the light on and he forgot to close it turn it off it's like left the light on going to go home and turn it off anyways the guy it was Pete Davidson oh every chick wants to funkete davs I I don't I don't get it we have a friend I don't get it friend of the show Colleen wants to ████ Pete Davidson Sol never I've never seen any of his stuff that I was like okay this guy's talented I don't know I don't get it I I saw I saw his stuff and it ████ it made me dude he's super hot that's why I think he about he looks like he's dead big dick thing is that too is that to but it's also because like like he's dead I think ladies that date him are all ladies that like our ladies like
17:39 desirable ladies yeah yeah like like they're all like supermodels and ████ he tense but how does he date T if he looks like he's dead dude he's ████ like he's dead he has dark he's dead part of The Adams Family I'm like the ████ if Kim Kardashian dates you you get her R he looks like he's kicking drugs right now like he's just like kicking him like oh ████ I need a bump dude like he looks like he's just you know someone told me he's he's white and I was like he's a white guy is he white I have no idea what he is he's like racially ambigous he's dead he looks like he could be a vampire you know yeah I met him before he blew up too it so crazy he look like he vitamin deficient he was really cool yeah he actually was really funny you want to I I want to ████ that guy one more one more yeah I saw him at the at I didn't know he was a comedian right before he got know he was a comedi he got it think he was I
18:30 thought he was just a ex-boyfriend for everybody well he started when he was very young like he was most known as that that's kind of sick though it's kind of sick to I thought he was just everyone's ex-boyfriend kind of is like a rebound guy yeah dude to be the Hollywood rebound gu kind of lit you know what it is though too everyone says that he's very open with his feelings and I think ladies like that yeah but but not withholding we're withholding that's why he's good as a rebound guy because it's like nice and then he's open up with his feelings and don't actually want that it but that's what I'm lacking I don't open up dude I keep my ████ in I don't complain I don't I don't I don't ████ huh if you do it every now and then I think it'll help no just do it at the beach I can't do it dude I just can't you got to try dude you got to ████ try tell something right now that's like ████ bothering you oh God about yourself some real ████ a non bit too it's got to be real that's like really
19:21 bothering me yeah something you really insecure about uh I'm oh I'm insecure about yeah yeah yeah you can't be complaining about somebody else we got like 30 seconds no dude I got nothing I got nothing you have no insecurities I think you're bottling it in hold on you going make me cry right now dude uh no nothing that's really like uh no how's your relationship with your father here's the thing dude you touched a subject that I don't want to talk about you're going to let me ████ get pissed
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