0:06 Welcome back to another episode of Care for Boys. Today we have with us a very distinguished gentleman, MR. TAIKA QUAN. >> OH, HELLO. >> HELLO. How old are you, sir? >> 550,000 YEARS OLD. >> WHOA. I NEVER MET SOMEBODY SO OLD. >> 500. WHAT? [laughter] >> THOUSAND? WAIT, it's not thousand million. >> Yeah, thousand million. >> You said five billion. >> It's not thousand million billion. >> No, 5,000 million. >> How did you get to be so old? >> A potion drink. >> A potion. You drink. >> Okay. >> Are you older than a Stegosaurus? >> No. >> Oh, >> obviously not, Joe. >> Oh, [laughter] come on, Joe. This guy doesn't know dinosaurs, apparently. >> This guy doesn't know his dinos. [laughter] >> Are you older than a mammoth?
0:56 >> Yeah. >> Okay. Okay. Yeah. Checks out. Checks out. All right. Well, welcome back to the show. We haven't seen you for a little bit. >> Thank you. [laughter] >> Cool, cool, cool, cool. >> Do you like this whole new setup or do you like the old one? >> The old one? >> No way. >> Why you like >> Yeah, the old one's way bigger. >> You like the desks or you What do you like about it? >> I just like it. >> Yeah, we still got the arcade at this one. You see that one over there? >> He's locking on right now. He's like, "You guys have a bunch of ████ on there." >> It's about 10 It's about It's not really an arcade. It's more like a table. But >> it's about 10 ft away. You can't see the arcade. >> Okay, I have to zoom in. >> Oh, you can zoom. >> Oh, what the heck, dude? >> Wow. [laughter] >> I can see it. >> He leans in. >> That's tight. Hey, I like your uh your necklace. >> Thank you.
1:46 >> Yeah. Can we do a fit check? What do you got here? >> Yeah. Let me see what you got. All your clothes and why you talk about your accessories. >> I don't know. >> You don't know? >> No. >> Yeah. I have a question. Do you think someone like me could pull off a necklace like that? >> Yeah. >> Oh, thank you. Thank you. Hear that, Bonos? [laughter] >> In your face, actually. >> Said to him today. Are you a Rastafa Farai? >> What is that? >> It's the colors on your necklace. >> It's kind of a religion. [laughter] >> It's like red, green, yellow, black. >> It's related to reggae music. >> What's a What's a guy? >> What would a Rostafari guy sound like? Maybe that'll help. >> Hey, man. Jamaica. Ah, he speaks PWA. >> He doesn't like every accent. >> Come on. >> Do you feel like you could do a Jamaican accent or Okay. All right. Shut it down. >> What's your favorite accent? Let me hear your best accent. >> I don't know. >> What about your British? Have you been
2:36 working on your British? >> Hello. >> Can you say that? >> You can't say that. Okay. >> You know what's the coolest accent? The one that goes, "Want to thank the Father, the Son, the Holy Spirit." [laughter] That's right. A dude, what do you like better? Mexican accent or Chinese accent? >> Au. Au. What do you like better? This one? >> Mexican. >> Mexicans's better. >> You ever heard the phrase open your eyes? V. You ever heard that? >> V. >> Don't teach him that. [laughter] >> What's wrong with that? >> He's seen He's seen crazier movies, dude. >> Yeah. Yeah. Like Radar. >> Yeah. You seen radar movies? >> No. Wait. ever watches rated R movies? >> Watched. Hey, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. >> What's the last rated R movie you
3:27 watched? >> Lion Hart. >> Did you like it? >> Yeah. >> What was your favorite part of Lion Hart? >> Uh, I don't have one. >> Okay, cool. >> I don't even think I've seen this movie. >> You're not cool enough to watch it, honestly. >> Well, there there was one part you kept telling me to rewind back to. What was that part? [laughter] >> Oh, you want to see the babes? Is that what it is? >> No, no, no. There's a part that when mom came home, he's like, "We got to show mom." >> Which part is that? Nuts. [laughter] >> It's a secret. >> You can't share. Why not? >> You're afraid if mom finds out or what? >> Is it one of the fight scenes? >> Yep. Okay. >> It's not one of [laughter] the Don't choke on the fight scenes. >> No, >> it's way in the beginning. >> Or is it when the dude's burning up? [laughter] >> He sets him on fire, right? [laughter] >> Yeah. Yeah. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He sets his brother on fire. >> You want me to see that again?
4:17 >> Can I ask you what did you like about that scene? Is it just his expression? Because it is kind of funny. He's like ah like that. >> Well, he likes it when the guy gets rolled in and is he's like burned to a crisp. >> He's like, >> "Oh my god, >> he's like barbecue." >> Yeah, >> he's a burnt chip. [laughter] >> Yeah, I guess that's pretty funny. >> Do you like What's your favorite Christmas movie right now? >> Poly Express. >> Oh, that's really cute. She loves Polar Express. >> She has some really She likes to watch it over and over and over. I've actually been on the Polar Express train before. You should ask them. You You guys should take him there. >> Where is that? >> I did it in Arizona, but I think they have it. >> Arizona. [laughter] >> Who's got the time to go there? >> Do you want to go on the Polar Express chain? >> Let me see. Yeah. >> Okay. >> Oh, cool. All right. >> Ta, are you still Mexican?
5:08 >> What? >> Or Chinese? >> You're Chinese? >> Oh, he's Chinese. >> Chinese. >> Still Chinese, huh? >> Yeah, dude. >> You're not Mexican anymore? Mom, >> wait. Do you think that you can be both? Oh, okay. >> Both. >> Now you can't. No, cuz when we That's like a re like we we we we asked him every time he comes back. >> Mostly Mexican. >> And then he uh he at first his he was he he's just Chinese. He's nothing. >> I'm Chinese. >> Yeah. He's like, "Nope." >> He's recognizing his Mexican side. >> I'm mostly Mexican now. Haven't you been working on some Chinese? Say some of the Chinese you always say. >> Okay. >> How about Spanish? Do you speak Spanish? >> A little bit. Like I don't know how many. >> You know when I first met you when you were a little baby, you're speaking only Spanish. >> Whoa. No way. >> That is that pretty crazy to think about. >> Yeah. I don't remember how to speak. >> You're like you were saying telephono.
5:58 You're saying esposa. You were saying >> before English even? >> No, for real. He he was speaking Spanish. Tiff was talking to him and I was like, "Don't do that. >> Don't reinforce this baby." >> He's speaking English. That's what I told him. >> Oh, okay. Wow. That's cool, man. He used to look at you go pa back your shirt. The back of your shirt looks really cool. Look at that. A dino chomping a Whoa. >> Okay, [laughter] that's not what I meant. But >> wasn't expecting that one. >> It makes it makes the dinosaur look like it's going. He's biting the skateboard. [laughter] Trying to make the dinosaur. >> I like your shoes, too, dude. >> Thank you. Like the one in that picture. >> Yeah, bro. That's you, dude. Yeah. >> What do you think of this guy? >> Uh, >> do you know who that is?
6:48 >> The only um uh >> he's Don't go so close to his face. >> Okay, now it's blurry. It looks like him when it looks like him if he's a robber. [laughter] >> So, he said a robber with special needs. That's what he [laughter] said. So, you you're saying that guy in that picture looks like a robber with special needs. So Anthony Lee, Anthony Lee when he was in college >> looks like Bart Guan if he was a robber. >> Honestly, that's proof that we don't come up with this stuff. >> That was good. >> That's good. >> Come up with this. >> Yeah, [laughter] >> he's a robber. >> Do you know you know your uncle Anthony? You're Theo Anthony. Do you know that's him? >> Oh >> well, there you go. >> Oh, I got a question for you. [laughter] >> So >> So you know um Yeah. >> Who did you Where did you learn that? From school or did you learn that from
7:38 Theo Anthony? Who's the first person that you heard? >> Really? Oh man, [laughter] >> we went over this. He said, "Anthony, >> work on your lines." [laughter] >> Are you excited uh to grow up and have a square head like your dad? [laughter] >> I think he's got mom's jeans, bro. >> That's a That's a oval. >> That's oval. >> Oh, okay. >> Egg. [laughter] >> Not a square, more egg. >> Pretty soon its head is going to turn into a chicken cuz it hatch. >> Oh, [laughter] okay. >> Whole head's a chicken. Yeah, cuz it's going to hatch pretty soon. >> Oh, cool, man. How old are you now, Taigga? >> Um, it's now 6 billion. >> Oh, >> wow. You aged that much. >> Age quick, huh? >> Billion years passed. >> How old do you think he is? That guy right there. >> Um, 345. >> Nice. >> Thank you. Quite young. How old do you think uh she is?
8:28 >> Five. [laughter] >> At least >> you look like a baby. That's what it is. >> That face cream's working. >> At least he knows how to treat. Yeah, I know, right? >> [laughter] >> always always say they're younger. >> How how old do you think uh Uncle Joe is? >> Uh uh 900 years old. >> Oh, 900. That's pretty good. Still pretty young. I'm older than you. [laughter] Yeah. >> Oh, >> he's three I should say. Sorry. >> How old is your mom though? >> Uh 42. That's [laughter] the real smoked. >> The actual age put on blast. [laughter] >> He just super smoked right now. >> She gets >> We all We all had fun ages. >> She doesn't get a comically high number.
9:19 >> What about What about your T Ryan? How old do you think that guy is? >> Oh my man. >> You You have some white hair on your beard, so you look like you're 68,000. >> 60,000. >> 8,000. >> 68,000. 68,000. You got to round up a little bit. >> I feel that's a little over the hill. >> 68,000. >> Cuz look at that white hair you have on your beard. >> I know. [laughter] >> Thanks. Remind him again one more time. Can you tell me about my prostate size? >> OH, WHOA. >> Where'd [laughter] you get that? We don't even have mics like that. >> I see. >> Are you going to report something? Are you going to report some breaking news? You got to take a special report. >> Yeah. Give us a report. Give us the breaking news on JK News. What do you got? >> News. When he was a teenager, he he robbed so many banks and the police couldn't catch him cuz he's too fast. >> Hell [laughter] yeah.
10:11 >> UNDER ARREST. >> I THOUGHT YOU I thought you were I thought you're breaking news. >> Let's go. He just ratted you out on camera. >> What else you got, man? What else going on? >> Give breaking news on on Theo Joe over there. >> What's happening with with >> Theo Joe's dad was the Hawaiian King. [laughter] Oh, that's cool. Kameha, bro. Wow. >> What about Theo Nick? What's What's some news on Theo? >> Why'd you laugh? [laughter] >> Why did you do so much fun when I laugh? >> Why you laugh like a grandpa? [laughter] >> I'm 56 billion. Remember? >> Oh, that's right. All right. All right. Let's hear the news on this guy. News on Nick. >> Um that his dad that his grandpa was the the Asian Santa. >> [snorts] >> Oh, [laughter] >> the ancient. >> Mine's better than all you guys. >> The ancient.
11:01 >> What about the Orion? What are some breaking news? >> That he's older than a dinosaur. >> I'm older than a dinosaur. That's what a compliment. >> Hey, I'm sorry, dude. Thank you. [laughter] >> Just don't say I'm 42. >> The gray hair he keeps pointing out. >> What about Miss Bonos over there? >> That her that her mom was was the owner of the gold. >> Owner of the gold. >> Yeah. And then she broke it into little pieces, turned it, and then put it on her hair. >> How that's very sweet. >> Real gold highlights, huh? >> Wow. >> Thanks for noticing. Thank you for not >> That's really sweet. It's real. >> It's all in the detail. >> It's not fake. >> That she's really Mexican. >> Whoa. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. [laughter] Everything is just factual for mom. >> Be And we're And her mom should be the Mexican food queen. >> The Mexican food. She cooks good, huh?
11:53 >> Yeah. >> What's your What's your grandma's favorite like your favorite dish that she makes? >> Is that Is that like thing where there's like chips in there or something like that? >> Chilis. >> Oh, chilles. >> You're not going to [laughter] know those are good. He said the thing with the chips in it. A rocontos. [laughter] >> What about What about the uh the chrizo? The the chizo and eggs. You like that too, right? >> Sounds like you like that more. >> [laughter] >> Tiger, are can you tell us the breaking news of your favorite food? >> Breaking news. My favorite food is >> pecking duck. >> That's a hard one, huh? >> You like pecking duck? >> He likes the pecking duck head >> and he likes to chew >> a dinosaur.
12:43 >> Dinosaur. >> Dinosaur. Like eating dinosaurs. >> Those. >> Dang. >> He goes to dim sum and gets the chicken feet. All right. What's going on in Taika's school? >> Yeah. >> What's some breaking news? >> Yeah. What's cool? >> Are you Are you cool in school? >> What's the cool thing going on? >> He zipped it up and he locked it away. >> Oh, >> see, we're too old to know. >> It was a secret. >> Ate it again. >> Ate another key, huh? >> He didn't he didn't choke on it this time. It was good. >> Wait, what's the latest brain rod thing that he's been saying a lot? >> Um, are you are you over 67 or still 67 still the thing? >> Oh. Oh, >> 67. >> He has to say it. It has to come out. [laughter and gasps] >> It has to come out. >> Do you think it's cool if like people our age say 67? >> No. >> No. He loves it when I go to his school and I look at all the kids, I go, >> "Oh, you love that." >> 67.
13:35 >> You like that, huh? >> He goes, "Stop it, Dad." [laughter] >> Does he look like Which character in Roblox does he look like? [laughter] A special needs character. >> A special needs character. >> A special [laughter] >> That's a bacon. >> That Wait, what? >> That's a bacon. A bacon is when you're really bad at Roblox. >> A bacon called? >> Yeah, you're a bacon dude. >> I'm actually really good at Roblox. >> Did you talk about the pig character? [laughter] >> Let's see what that looks. >> John Pork [laughter] head guy on Roblox. A bacon. [laughter] >> This guy. >> Yeah, >> that's what Nick looks like. [laughter] >> Yeah. >> Wait, his hair is >> No. No. Like that. Like that. Like that.
14:26 >> Oh, this guy. >> And a girlfriend. Is that >> Oh, how cute. Look, that's you, bro. I've always wanted long hair like that. >> Yeah. >> And they just snip it and then make it black. >> Oh, then that's basically Nick. >> And [laughter] >> that's my face, dude. >> Special needs. >> Special needs. Cool. >> How do you do with special needs? >> Like that? >> Yeah, kind of. >> Okay, there you go. >> Like that. >> Me when I'm mad. That's when he calls me I have special needs. >> I think that's good. Yeah. >> It's not a bad thing to be called special needs. >> No, I don't think so either. >> Yeah. >> Ta. What's your special needs? [laughter] >> Come on, man. [laughter] >> What is that? He turned into a dinosaur. >> Yeah, is that a dinosaur? Is that a raptor? special needs. [laughter] >> What is this >> bird? >> He's a pterodactyl.
15:16 >> What the What [laughter] is this? >> Oh, wow. >> Hey, watch out. Watch out. You're going to pull the card. You're gonna pull the card. You're gonna pull the >> He's a pterodactyl. >> A very quiet one. >> Yeah. Yeah. [laughter] Yeah. Doesn't make that much noise. >> Linda. Oh.
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