0:00 so wait everybody knew their person their first time yeah yeah that's what normal people do you animal that's how that's how Christians [Laughter] [Music] Chappelle welcome back to careful boys we got Chappelle back colen's here as always wait wait T has it always been careful boys well dude don't don't don't tell me don't tell me anything right now cuz you walked in here and you said oh you guys changed something in the back over here you have you don't you don't have good awareness I know right my awareness is trash right now it used to be good mythical morning then we changed it oh okay oh damn it so you're you're very lucky that you're here yeah because today is a big day oh it is it is a big day did I get something you didn't get
0:51 [Music] something so the careful boy bro the show The Fanny Pack though show the careful boy okay here's my fanny pack my woji fanny inside inside is my privacy tokens e for check this out yeah so the careful boys have have solved gambling we we found out solved trick we tricked whoever it is in Vegas I I walk into Red Rock I got the ticket The Pit Boss is looking at me like how does he always how does he always do it we're on a a two- win street car we we're two time Super Bowl champions and now we just won UFC three so three three times Shake right now three times stre but but we had a little interrup between the two Super Bowls we lost the Super Bowl in between them you could give that to the pandemic though so it doesn't count yeah doesn't count so you guys are gamblers oh degenerate gamblers my
1:41 friend so you guys are no no you guys are sinners ████ oh yeah you don't believe in gambling look how sweaty my are 500 for you thank you thank you thank you everybody you don't want extra money see that out there to help pay us also I would like in next time thank you very much all right was up for a month buddy so wait give me the back story you're going to go to hell with us am I wrong I just feel like as soon as I get in start I like how they did this on camera I'm just sitting here cuz we make oh yeah so now we got to make the next now I look like like a weirdo just like oh wow that's great exactly but this is how it's going to work you're going to be here with us when we make the next bet and when we win you can come back but you say you don't gamble so you don't you don't get to or or you just pick the next BET right now you don't have to gamble you just watch us bet on it yeah I gu scared of that stuff yeah
2:31 yeah that is kind of Scar you don't bet at all dude he was a cheerleader bro that do mean anything you're that guy who's like no no no we can't do this guys this is bad we got to go home I am that guy though I am that guy I am that guy I you but do you feel like you have a skill set to bet on cheer yeah easy Che but I don't want to do that well just tell us and we'll do it no one's going to bet on cheer what could you bet on I would bet on anything you just bet on the routine like routine someone getting dropped on the floor yeah no uh I mean I guess you can bet like bet who's going to win if you tell me you've got an edge you're like hey dude I woke up all right and when I when I had little stars in my eyes it was the color yellow and that's the cheerleading squad we're betting that today I feel like I'm in really oh yeah you're like that I'm like that really I'll be down so wait is this like an addictive personality you guys have
3:21 no no no just a regular we just all jump in all the time on anything I'm doing this against my will I don't want to do this but they're all making me do this you just $500 dude it was his Pi yeah yeah you don't feel like do you're forced to do it it was his Pi he doesn't even care I care I was scared the whole time wait what did you guys bet on BET on UFC 300 we won UFC 300 damn you guys ████ kicked ass D that's tight wait on every we a parlay three three 4 three oh you only you only bet three fights but you have to you have to win all three fights to win the bet yeah but you don't have to uh guess how they're going to win right no no we could more money if we did that but we bet so basically it happened in order too like we needed all those fights to have to be in our favor that's how that's how we how we bet this much and how we end up winning this so I'm
4:11 assuming you bet uh Pereira to win uh Holloway to win and uh uh you racist you can't say her name say it say it try it just try just guess just guess you'll probably get it right you probably get it right ignore those guys I'll give you a pass come on Zang Wang yeah is that it yeah sounds a lot like ching chong to me I just when I went when I went to bet it I just pointed I was like I don't ████ know the one with the Z do you watch the UFC uh no not not particularly like I I like how do you know all the winners I don't even know the winners right they they do the highlights it's always he secretly bets yeah no I do not I'm not a sinner I'm actually I'm actually glad you guys brought me here today and you showed me this I wanted to talk to you guys about something
5:01 I'm a Arc okay no you're the guy who in high school is ████ his chick in the butt cuz it's not having sex you're the virginity guy I I believe I believe they say that's the uh that's the Mormon way yeah yeah that's what they say but that's not me that's so I lost my virginity at 21 did you that's late hey me too dude oh too yeah yeah is that not late am I is that crazy that's a little late it is it's a little late absolutely I mean he says who what' you say weren you surrounded by chicks from cheerleading yeah I was I was surrounded by a lot of chicks you waited till 21 yeah what's average then yeah yeah what's the yeah Mr sex guy I was having sex when I was 8 and a half years old not with your uncle what dude uncles don't count all right all uncles don't count wait so 15
5:53 15 um 21 is not late I had sex dude I was I was 15 years old 15 yep movie theater Xmen Xmen 2 X-Men United pack theater on the floor not kidding what movie x 2 Xmen to X-Men United oh wow dude when Wolverine remember when Wolverine's like punching his his clock through people skulls and ████ yeah I was literally having sex during that really yeah yeah I'm so you both were punching no no no I was punching up yeah yeah she was going down I was how did you accomplish that yeah dude thisit in a pack theater this ████ would not would not take no for an answer say that talk about being a square in the moment I was like this is kind of crazy and she was just like no we're doing it it was like decided like we're she like she teacher yeah no she knew that whole day that like or leading up to to it like
6:44 that we were going to be ████ but if you think about she Professor X it's probably easier in a packed theater than uh theater that's not packed right why how is that l oh no no there's that's a no that's a good point no no no no he's right he's right cuz it's harder to notice yeah Everyone's Watching X2 bro it's harder to notice sex by this guy by this guy by this guy but if you're shaking the whole row isn't the road like what the you they were on the ground not that space like when's the last time when's the last time you looked at the ground when you were watching a movie yeah exactly you were like there's a bunch of popcorn on the floor I know yeah right Flor by the way it was great it was great no it was like I guess we technically had sex you were just nervous the whole time oh dude did you finish I was trying to watch the movie yeah yeah you're like this is the best scene you couldn't do
7:34 this in the opening looking over the seat the whole time like I think hope Gambit comes out Colossus needs to come out any minute now he didn't he wasn't in that movie oh he wasn't in did you finish or no it's too we huh I don't know what happened on a it was just like it was like we had an agreement like yes we just have sex yes we just did yes I think you got molested now we can tell our friends about it yeah exactly it's like that that pass and it was her first time too yeah wow oh what a mission yeah at least that's what she said yeah corner like that damn yeah that's crazy that wasn't that wasn't I'm a sinner right say it again say it again when's your first time 21 that was 21 yeah uh it was a it was a girl that was at the bar at Applebee she basically yeah know so stupid uh me and my brother
8:27 and my friend we went to Applebees and there was this girl that was like sitting across the way at the bar or homie was the bartender at Applebee's and I remember I know and I wasn't even drinking or anything like that you know cuz I was going to be the DD but I had like one beer or whatever and I remember uh this girl she comes up and she just starts talking to us but she come and S she sits right next to me right and me I like to catch a sign like from a girl is like like I I can't read signs that well right and so she started like rubbing her leg on me and I said oh ████ I'm sorry and I and I push your leg away I was like sorry about that yeah cuz I I was like oh ████ my legs are doing the right things though yeah yeah yeah yeah L and so I I guess so so anyways so she was totally drunk it happened it come to and come to find out she happened to live in
9:18 the same apartment complex as my brother no way yes yes they didn't know each other that's where my brother lives right and so she was like she was like well oh can one of you guys drive me home and my brother was like oh I'll I'll drive you know and she threw the keys at me even though my brother said he'll do it she threw the keys at me and I was like okay still can't read the signs still giving me the signs and I'm still like you're like oh you missed yeah what you can't tell us support what's up guys if you do not know we have a patreon I want you to click in our description and go over there and check out all the beautiful stuff we have for you it's super duper access for only our super duper exclusive lovers like yourselves you're going to be getting one never been released director's Cup every week but
10:11 not only that you get another fresh too hot for YouTube video we say some crazy ████ on there two videos a week but not only that you get to join our Discord and come chat with us direct access we're in there the whole careful boy in there jump Jing in dog piling on people laughing playing joking whatever and you can come talk to us directly so if you like what we do and what we've been doing for the past 10 years please support our patreon and click the link below to get all the details there's so many different tiers you can see it when you click that so driving her home or whatever then we pull up to her crib and she's like uh she's like what does your brother's apartment look like and I was like oh I'm I like I'm pretty sure it looks like yours you know I was like you guys live in the same complex you know it was like probably same lay talk about
11:01 floor plans and ████ and that's what I thought I was like oh it's probably the same layout you know and then she was like can I come over I was like uh I was like oh uh you know what my brother's a kind of welcoming guy I was like I'm pretty sure he wouldn't mind so we're in there so so we go to my brother ████ you guys that was great I'm getting caught in mouth tell this story I still think about it I get nervous uh so then we go to my brother's apartment and then we're sitting there and then she was like uh you you should have some drinks and I was like ah you know I was like N I was like I got to beat up early you know I'm not really early morning guy yeah you know you know I was like I you know I'd rather rather not drink and my brother was like Chelle take a drink and I was like I was like okay I'll do one I'll do one and then she was like you should you should drink a little bit more and I was
11:51 like I was like no you know I'm not really you know wanted to drink a little bit more and finally I drink little my brother took her my brother steps with her outside they step outside right and then I don't know what they're doing they're just like talking but I'm still like confused I'm like what the hell's going on so then they come back in like are there floor plans do they really match or no so so they go so my they come back in my brother she sits back down next to me my brother goes to his room he comes back out he goes Chelle I'll be back and he throws a condom at me it hits me in the face and it landed on my shoulder and it was just right there just a magnum and I was like uh yeah told that whole story just to say Magnum I bet on [Laughter]
12:42 that then all of a sudden she just ████ took all of her clothes off and I was like oh my God I didn't know what the ████ was going on and I'm sitting there having sex and me and girls was playing you know yeah I remember that clearly but I I didn't even finish I was just like out of it and I was some we just stopped and yeah what did you say were you watching me girls I was I was cuz I was like cuz I was like kind of like for Gambit cuz I got pretty drunk you know looking for Mean Girls yeah that's when he comes out Mean Girls such that's like a scene from a movie that's crazy oh it was wild it was wild I had no clue what the ████ was going on and then and then and then everybody was like you're going to be addicted to it watch I never got addicted to girl I saw the musical was really good no to like to like sex then like oh you're going to be hooking up with girls all the ████ time and I was like no
13:34 that was scary did she she had no idea that was your first time I wonder if she well I wonder if my brother told her that like yo he's not I wonder if no oh he told me what he said to her he said he's not going to read he's not going to catch what you're throwing at him oh so let me throw a condom at his face my brother's a little slow yeah yeah basically you're going to have to yeah you're going to have to like pretty much so for 13 minutes you sat here and called a siners like Bill bajillion times you ████ a random chick at Applebees not at Apple from Apple from Apple be that is like Center ████ no it wasn't but you never saw her again or anything never saw her again whoa straight to never tried to purs never tried to pursuit or anything or you know just damn I think I didn't
14:25 have sex again till like a year later did you avoid that Applebees moving hell yeah did ████ that was nerve-wracking did she say bye uh oh I didn't tell you this part so after we were done uh she asked me to walk her home right and I'm walking her home but I kept the condom on so I'm walking her home underneath the clothes underneath the cloth oh just in case yeah just in case she just grabs you it's a cute first time thing two one maybe has anyone ever said that you have too much RZ it's very concerning yeah I was just walking her home with a condom on but like in jeans and ████ like that yeah damn is that a new trend we should try yeah you got to try it bro you make me feel like I'm the ████ fa I need this guy around all the time
15:15 how'd you tell your brother about it afterwards he knew what went down you know he's like what happened I was like dude that looks so real that looks so real dude yeah oh that's exactly dude you got to realize like cuz I I was like I'm a lover boy so I didn't grow up like trying to like hook up I was trying to fall in love so like that was like a world to me that was like scary that's me too but not in this video not not in this story did your brother your your brother uh knew that you didn't finish uh was he pped man what hey man did your brother know that you ████ got hard or how how hard did you get did your brother know how hard you got he's got to know
16:05 yeah yeah I told him everything but I was like nervous telling them I'm nervous telling this damn story yeah I can't even look up okay now okay now ask Colleen when her firstly asking when was your first time I was uh also 15 in a movie theater trying to watch the movie it was whoa whoa who my chick my chick some say I'm a Steve's hot sister Mexican for did you me that would be crazy though Mexican sounds like my nightmare like just imagine that for like one more second no I'm okay waa wa how did you know what to do yeah I didn't but like you knew how to use you use she had to help me get my pants off you used the condom longer than most they were skinny jeans theyel they stayed around the ankles the
16:55 whole time yeah yeah that's pretty impressive what that's pretty impressive that weren't about having sex and then that just fell on your lap yeah you Doctor ditt yourself into a sexual situation you Norbit your wayb I ████ love norin well how many people he their first time they had sex they like knew what they were doing yeah what are you guys judging me for huh you guys freaking no I wasn't judging you I was also just having sex with the stranger is crazy I don't know if I that's what I'm saying that's Center ████ to the max oh come on don't call me a center and you and you did it on accident that was the only random person I think I've ever had sex with yes oh suddenly looking up huh same day delivery yeah same day delivery before same day delivery never had Amazon Prime never had that that's
17:45 two-day delivery w wow that seems scary yeah it is scary we don't know the person yeah go wrong say so many things go wrong so many things that's a technically less liability though if it's just it's like a one day thing you know what in your mind could go wrong what do you think that person that person could be crazy you probably lose a condom maybe that'd be bad probably lose a condom lose the condom up in there not if you keep it on under your jeans after to me you got the evidence yeah I got the evidence I don't think you're losing the Magnum in there no no small you'll lose her in the mag she's just wrapped up in it I don't look at those condoms at all you don't no no I don't look at the the Magnum ones yeah we don't they got mag they got Magnum Juniors though Magnum J don't call them that okay mag they're
18:35 still Magnum Magnum Junior the Juniors R small on the side Magnum Flintstones so wait everybody knew their person their first time yeah yeah that's what normal people do you animal that's how that's how Christians ████ Chapelle you should just let us soak or something you know you know what you tripping in sin right now aren't we let me tell you let me tell you how I am so for the longest time I wouldn't let a girl go down on me cuz I thought it was rude rude yes I can see that I can see that so what' you say oh rude on your part yeah cuz so sticking mouth when I cheered thanks so when I cheer sometimes I was the only guy on the team so there was there was a time where I was the only dude on the team so I'm just around these girls like all the time like we're like our schedules are ████ crazy cuz we're compe your period schedule I feel
19:27 so bad for you oh my God any ████ way cuz I'm not a sinner so uh whenever girls were like be at practice and they be talking about like their hookups or whatever you know anytime they talked about I just gave them head they they sounded so like oh disgusted by it so I was like oh ████ they don't like that oh okay so that's why so you were conditioned by I was conditioned by what I was hearing that's because you're not reading the signs though because they're not trying to be like yo I gave you head they don't want to sound like a ████ yeah like you know I gave him head but inside they like so I would hear that I was like yeah yeah so it felt nonous yeah no Anthony you're so wrong you're not a sexh thank you wait what's it called a sex what sex H sex H yeah we know that he has sex that's what it's called that's that's what it's called over here
20:17 I didn't do it in the theaters with each other okay hey didn't what uh so you so how'd you get over this hump it's a big hump the big hump of what of you think it's rude to put your dick in a chick of disassociated rudess how did you fix or do you still think oh they would just ████ grabbing I'm like hey what are you doing slow down yeah it took it took me a minute did you feel the same way about the inverse about you going down and on the chicken eating good in the neighborhood no are you are you just like this is a gentleman's estate Madame no we don't do that here listen I ████ regular guys okay regular like got just regular ████ you know nothing regular s okay make a list who's the coolest guy in this video I make a list very cool make a list cool guy in this video
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