0:00 thank you [Music] so um there's really not much to say about this so why'd you pick it then [Laughter] oh no Bart doesn't want to see it anymore ████ like this before is this another like a ninja was raped or some ████ fast used to yourself for all Ryan day dude if a ninja gets raped though that's impressive that's all I'm serious about the story behind this one you have to sneak around exclusive on that a Grandma's dying wish I mean just imagine a Grandma's dying wish was to have a penis put on her tombstone
0:52 nice is that India that's incredible that's a realistic penis suddenly you're uh is it her husband I shared this that's a big ass dude that's what if if so that's why she died they got that whole they got the whole bottom thing too yeah the stack is made of stone it's huge that looks modeled after some guy's actual dick it's a great that guy's got a chubster for sure I mean for Katarina that's that's literally this uh grandma's name she is 99 years old she decided to leave a very quote distinctive mark on the world that will leave people remembering her for years to come was that her like wish before she was dying because if it's her dying wish as she's dying you know dying people kind of say the craziest ████ right yeah sure she's got like dementia
1:43 still her though and I wonder if she's buried upright on top of her head dude no if she's buried where the dick is coming like from her pelvis oh yeah that's sick that's how you do it yeah what's going up and then the thing is she wanted a hard dick too she didn't want a dangly dick well she was gonna be like the Fuddruckers blow up things and ████ like that so it's constantly malleable I'm into that yeah so those are dying wish which means that you know there's no fact checking on whether or not she was wishing for this a long time before her death it was a dying wish thing yeah do you think it was like one of those planned ones like when I die like it's in paper like yeah in her will yeah like I want the hard dick or was it like like her ████ Last Breath was like
2:37 did you just say the same thing but whisper you're like dying verbally not not in like writing got it yeah yeah yeah one is like ████ like with the ████ like a quilt ████ the feather pen notarized yeah and it's like or was it broken up in pieces well she's like I want a hard uh and they're like oh dick I'm gonna put it together gotta put the whole sentence together that's it yeah or is it like maybe like you know God forbid when the time comes Nikki's Grandma Nikki's Filipino Grandma Whispers in my ear and she's like saying some ████ and I'm like ████ I don't really care pretty sure it's the garlic but I think she wants a big hard dick statue over her grave I don't know I think that's what she said I know I want to hurt it I don't know you're gonna make it out you
3:28 weren't there I don't know how would you know that's what we're gonna do one of her last words that's what you're getting there too still okay what's that mean ladies Mexican by the way ████ ████ or something uh do more Indian accents I think okay okay so weighing almost 600 pounds the massive Stone member has been called what's inside of it recognition of her love and joy for life Katarina's grandson Alvaro Mota Limon I don't know why I said oh wait they're Hispanic yeah said his grandma liked calling her family verga which is a Mexican slang word most accurately translated to ████ they called her grandma grandma dick she called everyone she called everyone dick yeah she she liked calling her family verga oh hey Dave oh that's cool yeah that's dope all right so like she kind of has that Vibe that's a very very uh fun uh slang that's like Vamos a la
4:20 verga yeah it's like we all go to the ████ or whatever but everybody in Mexico loves that saying I say it all the time when I Mexico they love it I think it's inappropriate but they're like better guys yeah if you if you know what I'm talking about in the comments just go ahead and write that in English like let's all go to the penis when you go visit your uh in-laws I made it all Italian too that's good what's the what are the appropriate uses for that it's one of those things that's either an insult or a compliment you know when you call somebody a ████ oh sorry what's up ████ or you ████ it's it's kind of like that in the sense of saying Vega exit in there like what there's like some sort sort of like directional verb what the hell does that mean it depends though because if that's
5:11 a phrase but there guys is a term in and of itself it depends on the who though because if I'm a person who doesn't have very many friends and I hear you refer to Ryan as a ████ I'm like oh I probably hate this guy it didn't used to always be like this man why are they being wait sounds like they're bullying each other they're beefing yeah they're definitely beefing with each other you can see it the way he said off camera almost Sophia Vergara you can tell they have definite beat because I don't have any friends to compare this to and uh real friendships shouldn't have that kind of relationship speaking very matter of fact just just wondering so did she die and she has the Tucson or did she make the tombstone before she died oh damn she had to make it herself Barrel she crafted it herself she killed her it crushed her killed her I mean I don't
6:02 think she uh made it herself okay just to clarify but uh and we'll just assume that she's totally dead already and it just happened we'll just assume okay her grandson Alvaro uh says that when she was throwing the word at her family she meant it to mean that they were people of Integrity courage passion and at the same time love and joy that's what that's what a hard dick means I think so hey women love it they do they love it it's Integrity telling people this all the time they don't really get it yeah this story helps with that I thought Middle School boys like dick the most but now I realize it's Mexican grandmas Mexican Grandmas this uh she did the entire census for the for the entire Mexican grandma population out there you guys wouldn't want interesting things on your tombstones a giant velga maybe more expensive I've seen baking recipes
6:52 oh that's nice baking recipes yeah like people will have their own like dish and they'll have the recipe engraved on their Tombstone you know it doesn't look cool but is cool the QR codes that you've been seeing on tombstones that's kind of whack but the idea of being able to like look it up and then like see that person's like life in different ways or whatever they that's kind of type change of heart in me now what if the QR code went straight to JK news did you guys submit we submitted right looking good yeah it's looking really good I hope we win that one it's looking really good would you would you guys want to be buried at a graveyard like like a normal person oh yeah man Rose Hills all the way oh yeah
7:43 what yeah family there is that why like I don't think I do so you're just gonna be there by yourself I just think the idea is cool I think I want to be buried but then like not this way the other way and on top of Michael Jackson face down that's really good face down so Michael Jackson is down here I'm gonna buy the space up there and I'm gonna go for you to buy the vertical spot yeah and then they're gonna but they have to place you like in front of them yeah so then I can finally meet him that's 69. why would you do that to Michael you know you should get the body of a 13 year old boy and put it on top of that true that's true no because they like because he wants to hang out it's a little too old it's because they want to hang out guys I wanted to do the QR code thing but when um when people look it up it's like me asking people to solve my murder
8:33 you've just accessed all the clues to my death please help solve this murder wow then I really just died of cancer I can't rest known as Don yakata grew up in poverty and was not able to go to school as a child but nonetheless became an important person in this area uh her grandstanding became mayor of the town for a period of time seeing his grandma taught her family that they could be anything they wanted and inspired them to get education hey Real Talk probably a weird time to bring this up but I saw a ████ ghost last night at my hotel room at the bike no ████ way I'm not ████ kidding I'm not ████ kidding it was so crazy I woke up at like probably five in the morning and and I'm just like you know on my side whatever and Nikki's next to me and I roll over and I look up and there's just a ████ dude standing over our bed what is he doing he's just standing there staring down but look it's a
9:24 complete silhouette he's Haitian bro I don't ████ he's being real I'm just I'm just wondering if if Spirits keep their hair I'm just wearing I'm just wondering it was a skinny dude standing over our bed he was gone he was just Shadow though I don't know he was skinny right but yeah it was it was dude I'm telling you like the shores I'm sitting here it was the shadow dude staying over bed there's like um this white lampshade behind um like in the corner that was covered obstructed by him whoa he was blocking it there's like Moonlight coming in through the curtains translucenting him no no translucent ████ it would look like some dudes in our ████ a regular
10:14 guy's dead the ████ dude no not floating just standing there staring down and I couldn't even put it together because just so it's just so weird I wasn't scared of anything no I was like what the I was just so confused I was like what the ████ this dude in my ████ room here and then I went there and then I sit up he takes a step back right ████ off oh I'm not kidding well whatever it is like he was moved he moved back I don't know that he stepped or whatever but he moves back like so he's closer to where the where the lampshade is right and then I'm like ████ confused I like look over here and look back he's gone whoa she's sleeping did you feel cold at all no no no you guys think we're gonna talk take your door lock was it locked was your butthole sore locked everything's normally yeah I had come all over my face in my in my tits oh ████ but I
11:04 didn't think that that was very weird did you decide did you switch rooms no we're going to talk to them we'll see what if you get charged for having an extra person that takes the water from the center you know they charge your room because he took the water no it was so ████ weird was that the first time ever that was it for a while there was this there's a there's a story where when I was a kid um we were coming in from Virginia to visit my grandma and I was staying in my mom's old room in my grandma's home and I wake up middle of the night same kind of ████ like there's an alarm clock like a glow from alarm clock like orange blow and there's this dark figure standing over the bed same ████ same person same ████ but this one if it didn't feel like this one I felt nothing around right felt nothing but this one I felt like a weird sense of like it's all good if the silhouette matched anybody in your prior
11:56 history or family or anything who would it be bro nobody that I know can you see the face no ████ no just it's just Shadow full Shadow so where did he have a driver's license any noises but the same ████ right it's the same ████ of like of like you are confused you look at it and then you look away and then it's completely gone but it was obstructing it was like obstructing the light that's what happens on acid for me that's how the that's how the commissioner feels about Batman yeah dude you don't look you shouldn't Look Away Don't Take Your Eyes Off Batman ████ because as soon as you look away he's gone he's like you fast back soon after you woke up where you saw the ████ figure it was like two minutes later did you oh so you were kind of I was up and like like I was like looking over here and I gotta drink of water real quick because I had like water by the bed and then you said you said excuse me this guy get some water and then I flip I flip over and that's when
12:47 I see this dude in the room and I'm like what in the absolute ████ because it's just it's like as short as like anybody you you like light somebody and there's just it's just that it's there's no translucent ████ he's not ████ oh I'm kind of floating yeah and it's just like a dude you can't see what the clothes what if he went away into like some sort of secret tunnel in your room you probably wanted to under the into a secret tunnel yeah but it's like this fast right it's like boom boom gone boom boom gone like it just doesn't make sense boom boom boom let me hear you say whale whale foreign
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