0:00 So, I was dating this girl one time, and she was over at my house, and we're in bed cuz I locked it in. >> I'll say. >> And she um >> Big ups. Big ups. >> That's what I'm talking about. >> Her phone just kept on ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing, and it's like 1:30 in the morning. >> Damn. >> like, it's if this phone is ringing this much, and it was like her ex-boyfriend trying to call her. >> Was she sleeping? >> She was asleep. >> Oh. >> And I see her phone ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing, and I'm And I'm going like, so if I wasn't here, is she picking up the phone? >> Yeah. >> You know what I mean? Like, so is she still like kind of seeing her ex a little bit? >> Yeah. >> but she's with me now, kind of thing. So, I thought it was ultra ultra sus. >> Did you see her again? >> No. >> Would you, though? Like, if you were alone and your ex-girlfriend was hella calling at 1:30 in the morning? >> Would I pick up? >> Yeah. >> Yeah, cuz she was hot.
0:50 >> [laughter] >> He doesn't miss, this guy. He has all the solutions. Easy answer. >> Do you think she was even maybe pretending to be asleep so she could ignore the phone? >> I don't know, but I just thought it was so weird that he he feels comfortable enough to call that many times. >> Oh, cuz it wasn't just one one call, a lot of rings. It was like >> It was like 18 times. >> Holy ████ >> to her Net- Netflix account? >> [laughter] >> What's the password? >> That could be. He That could be done with a text, I think. >> Cuz they both still pay for the same account half half. >> Could be. >> What if he was kidnapped and her number's the only one? >> Yeah, she's a ████ ninja, he needs her to save him. >> Yep. She was not a ninja. >> First of all, I >> She was not very quiet, I'll say that. >> [laughter] >> Wait, so So, in your mind, when that phone was going off, you were thinking that this guy is calling because this is booty call time. >> I think it's exactly that. >> Or do you think it's a I know you're
1:41 with somebody else. I'm going to blow up this phone, blow it up. >> Oh. >> I'm pretty sure he was kidnapped and she's a ninja, and she needs to go >> It's like Taken, yeah. >> Ninjas are quiet. >> How did you break up with her the next day? Were you just like, your phone is ringing way way much last night? >> [laughter] >> And I need sleep. I couldn't sleep. >> even tell her that I about it. I just sort of ghosted her. >> Wow. >> Yeah. I wasn't the most mature dude back then. But I got way more mature now. >> What? >> Yeah, way more. >> But isn't that kind of normal? [laughter] Like if they if you weren't around and they're kind of like bored and lonely, they probably would have picked up the phone and they probably would have hooked up. >> That's what I'm saying. >> But you saved her from moving on. >> Dude, she feigned sleepiness in order to respect you and you ghosted her. >> I don't know that she feigned sleepiness, but her phone kept going It It was a vibrate thing, so it was going
2:31 ring ring ring. I just >> But what if it was on silent mode without the vibrate? Would it have bothered you? >> I think if I saw he he was comfortable enough to call 18 times in a row. >> But that's a guy move that >> But also she didn't pick up >> And then you ghosted her for that. >> Actually, you're the ████ She didn't do anything wrong. >> Yeah, she like literally didn't do anything. >> She was just existing. >> You have no evidence, dude. >> I don't disagree. >> No wonder she broke up with the guy. >> You know what, dude? You were immature about that. >> there any other red flags? Or was that the only red flag and you just ran with that one? >> I don't remember any other red flags. I think the biggest red flag for me is that she wasn't funny. >> Yeah. >> [laughter] >> Didn't even like her. >> So he was He was looking for a reason. He was looking for an >> I was looking for an out. So he built this story about her being a ████ ████ >> And then you had post-nut clarity. >> Post-nut clarity. >> And then you're just realizing like,
3:22 I can't believe he's calling her that much. That's why she's probably breaking up with them cuz he calls too much He's ████ too needy. >> Also, she made me watch Gone with the Wind. >> Boo. >> Before you ████ >> She's white? >> Before we ████ yeah. >> The whole movie? That movie's like 4 hours long, isn't it? >> His first words, she's white. >> Dude, the whole No, she's white as hell. And the whole We had to watch the whole movie. >> That got her horny though, huh? >> Gone with the Wind is the whitest movie. >> That got hella horny She got hella horny. >> Yeah, I I guess it worked out. You know, I mean, we had to watch Anne of Green Gables for her to get wet, I guess. >> [laughter] >> But >> Did you want to pick up like I after like 10 times you're like, let me see what this guy wants? >> I didn't want to get involved. >> Uh >> You know what I mean? >> That's messy. >> Like I lived in K-Town at that time. Like I I didn't really have like bearings in my life at that point. Like I was working at this s█████ high-rise where I was selling printer toner and ████ I just
4:13 didn't want to like get involved with drama. >> So you were like, oh, this guy is clearly still not over her. Now you got to deal with like some ex-boyfriend that's going to be ████ up this whole >> Or yeah, or yeah, the dynamic. I think the dynamic shifted once I realized her ex-boyfriend felt comfortable. >> wasn't worth it. Cuz it's like ████ wasn't that good anyway. Gone with the wind. How many times can I watch this? >> Dude, you got to sit through 4 and 1/2 hours to crack some ████ That's That sucks. You would do it? >> Yeah, 4 and 1/2 >> I did it, brother. >> Yeah, yeah, I got to give it to you. >> Dude, 4 and 1/2 hours is a very short amount of time to crack that ████ >> Some of us waited years. >> Hey, but yeah, but think about it like this. It's like build-up cuz she lived in San Diego. So she's driving up. So it takes like 3 hours. >> That means her p████'s already ready for you. There's already a a some version of like a percentage that's already willing. >> Yeah, that's true. >> 2-hour plus drive to K-Town, too? That's
5:05 a that's dense LA. >> Why does it feel like you hooked up with a boomer? >> She's 60 She's 67 years old. Like what? >> She's old. >> What girl our age >> Was she older than you? >> No, she's younger than me. I think I She We went to high school together. It was like one of those like I broke up with my ex and then she broke up with her ex, I thought, and it's like, hey, remember in high school we almost we were like we almost ████ Let's just go Let's just Let's just get cracking. And uh >> Let's get back to it. >> Yeah, and we It was fun. >> Do you feel like you have like jealous tendencies? >> No, I'm very I'm very not jealous person now, but I used to be very jealous. Yeah, like in high school. >> Like a like a trust issue thing or just like an ego thing? >> in high school cuz I had acne and ████ like that. I just thought that I was worthy of of ████ ever. >> Like >> What made you like like suss that out in this past? >> Well, I mean first and foremost like if a dude calls and then you like ghost the
5:56 chick, but like she didn't do anything, then it's like it's probably a internal trust issue. [snorts] >> Definitely. >> But let's say a Chad calls Nina like 20 times at 1:30, wouldn't you be like, "The ████ Who the ████ is Chad Hotsauce or whatever?" >> [laughter] >> You're like, "Chad Hotsauce Who the ████ is that?" >> Chad Miami. He's been in me strap? >> [laughter] >> What a crazy name. >> What's his middle name, Hotsauce? >> First I would have to put myself in the context of like how many dates were you guys on? Because if you're not commit Nowadays if if Chad Hotsauce calls at 2:00, I'm calling back and I'm like, "What is this?" >> [laughter] >> Well, that's cuz you're married to her. That's >> Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Like how many dates were were you at though, you know? >> Very early. >> Cuz at Chad Hotsauce, I'm still like waking up in the morning and I'm like, "Hey, who's Chad Hotsauce?" >> Yeah, yeah, yeah, true. >> I think I'd be like Steve if I was in that situation. I think I would probably
6:47 do the same thing. >> You think? >> Yeah, if I saw a phone go off, I'm like, >> I think she's already out. >> Yeah, I think I was just already half step [clears throat] out. >> Yeah, yeah, not liking her is different. >> Cuz at that point you're kind of looking for reasons to get out of there, you know? And I think that was a good one cuz ex-boyfriend stuff is kind of a lot of >> And it could have not Like you guys said, it could have not been her fault at all, but I was just like >> But we're going to say it's her fault cuz we're telling the story. >> And cuz cuz we don't know her. >> His story, dude. >> Let's also be realistic, too. If the like if the sex was eight plus out of 10, I don't I think she I think she's funny. >> I think >> That's so true. >> I think she's funny. >> She's hilarious. >> [laughter] >> She's hilarious. >> She's literally the funniest chick ever. You're like, "Gone with the Wind 2? Yeah, I'm down." >> I [laughter] love movies, yeah. >> How strong is your guys's bro code? Like would you have picked up the phone and be like, "I ████ her. Leave her, man.
7:38 She's not worth it. She'll make you watch Gone with the Wind for 4 hours." >> I have zero bro code if she's not He's not my bro. >> Wait, did you start with I ████ her and then tried to be on his side? >> Wait, you said that she broke up with her boyfriend to hook up with you? >> No, no, no. She had just broken up with her boyfriend and I it Also it was fresh. >> were in fresh breakups. >> No, that's not the story. >> She broke up to hook up with >> Cuz like I know a lot I I train a lot of females and they tell me about their breakup stories and a common move I hear over and over again is just private caller like calling >> their phone. >> nonstop >> all the time >> just blowing it up >> Guys are so thirsty. >> Cuz I think it's I think it's the heartbreak though. It's like you're like, "Please." Cuz we remember we were talking about yesterday. You're like, "Please talk to me. Please." >> But I did that in ninth grade. >> Yeah, that's what that's when I did that ████ >> Brian McKnight could explain this better
8:29 than me. >> But some people never leave ninth grade though, you know? Sometimes that's the >> I think that's their first heartbreak and they're like 25. Because guys can't get it. >> Dude, poor guy is just calling up this chick's phone just crying like, "Please pick up. Please pick up." And Steve Green is just looking at the ████ phone. Chad Hotsauce calling. >> [laughter] >> One time I I I really felt guilty because I didn't know a girl had a boyfriend and then we hooked up and then he came to pick her up from my house. >> Oh my god. Wait, that's that's just a ████ >> I know, but then I I my heart was like, "Damn, you bad. That's crazy. I can't believe you have him pull up to the driveway and then >> And that's just a ████ >> She picked up the phone like, "Yeah, I'm just at my homegirl's house." And then she left and I was like,
9:19 "Damn, that's crazy. I just You did that right in front of me." Like Why? God, I got laid, but like wow, that's crazy. And I wanted to go out there and be like, "Hey, don't trust her, man. She ████ me." She ████ sucks so good. I know, but like you got to leave, man. Don't do it. Don't do it. He's You're You're better than a Uber. Well, they have Uber back then. But, I just felt so bad. Like, I was like, I'm complicit in this. I If I knew, I would have never done it. And maybe her response would have been like, I know you would have done it cuz you're a ████ That's why I didn't tell you. >> Did you Did you bone her again? >> At your dad's house. >> [laughter] >> So, after your feelings got hurt, you're like, I still got to ████ her one more time. >> Come on, man. I'm horny. >> Who is this one? >> I'll tell you later. >> [laughter] >> Oh, man. >> Okay.
10:09 >> Dude, at your dad's house is the sickest line. >> Great line. That you can say that is hilarious. >> And it's true. >> get picked up from >> But, you know what though? After that, well, I I don't think I ever wanted to be a boyfriend with her. What if my dad ████ her after? >> No. >> [laughter] >> But then, I think I that feeling of like, you're you're in the ████ zone now. We could never be together. >> Oh. >> the feeling. >> Not girlfriend material. You're just ████ material. >> Cuz I feel like all girls have this like potential. >> Mhm. >> Like, from a hookup. Like, maybe you may be cool. We don't know. But then, when you see moves like that, you're like, >> [snorts] >> damn, dude. That's crazy. Like, >> You're a pro bono prostitute. >> Your boyfriend has no idea. >> But, if the sex is like an eight out of 10, you're kind of like, You did say she sucked hella good though.
10:59 >> But, you know what? >> [laughter] >> I'm also like complicit. Like, I'm guilty. I can't judge. >> Yeah, twice. >> I was a part of this bank robbery, too. I can't be the getaway driver and be like, man, ████ you guys. You're wrong. You know? So, like, I don't know. I just felt weird. And but if I knew though, scout's honor, I wouldn't have done it. >> You did it like more times after that though. >> [laughter] >> Yeah, you saw her ex. You saw her her boyfriend pick her up. >> But, I already [laughter] I already did it. >> But, this is what I'm trying to >> confession in between the two accidents. >> can't double jeopardy is what you're saying. >> Yeah. >> Yeah, I get it. Why would you It's like it's done. >> You already did it. >> Did you do it a third time? >> No, I just twice. >> No. >> Yeah, but that's kind of how I felt, like it's I mean, it's already deep done. >> The second one's the confirmation, I think, maybe. You have to confirm it. Is the first one
11:50 correct? >> You got it out of your system? >> I think that I'm so insecure that if a chick sucked hella good, I'd be like, "Nah, she's she's ████ around all kinds of all kinds." >> I mean, it's probably true. >> Right? If she's super good at it. >> But that's why she practices. >> though. You wouldn't know that until after. >> Yeah. >> Till 2 days later. But then you're you're trying to work your way back. >> And then and then they have this like venom when they suck, too, that gets in your system where like a day or two later, you forget. >> You forget. >> I know. >> All the post-nut clarity just goes back to fogginess. >> Oh, what's that word called? >> Horny. >> Pre-nut. >> Horn again. Horn again. >> [laughter] >> Horn again. >> Yeah, you get horned again, dude. >> I think it's just our it's a genetic >> Yeah, it's just male >> brain, and then it goes away for a while. >> It's a chromosome thing. >> That is weird. We get We would We would uh sleep with people that we don't want kids with.
12:41 That's dangerous. >> don't leave it in, though. Steve, you guys aren't leaving it in, though. >> No, no, no, no, no, no. >> Joe, are you doing >> Dude, his bucket list was cream pies. Well, not with randos. You're not cream pie-ing randos, are you? >> No, he wants cream pies everybody. >> Yeah. >> Are you cream pie-ing like exclusively, Joe? No, right? >> Not anymore. I learned my lesson. >> Come on, dude. >> What are you doing? How did you learn it? >> [laughter] >> You guys got to pull out. We can't just leave it in. >> What are you doing? >> That's a good question. >> you were friends with Genghis Khan. You guys have to be responsible. You guys must pull out. >> guys. >> Yeah, you know what? I heard it was so easy to get pregnant in high school, and then all my friends on IVF and ████ and then they can't get pregnant. >> friends geriatric now, bro. They fertile in high school. >> And stress stress stress kills fertility. Let us know in the comments if you pull out.
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