0:00 [Music] okay so a serious health topic that we've just been discussing we've actually debated about it a couple times and i really want to just kind of get down to the facts because now we've received some new information tyson fury claims his success is down to masturbating seven times a day what the ████ seven times that guy's a big man he's six seven i would imagine maybe maybe he masturbates but he doesn't ejaculate oh technicalities in the wording that's true wait if he's like just gaining energy and not like letting go ████ dick yeah he's tantric ████ do we know do we know he's dragon ball i want to fantasize about that idea a little bit longer as if it does like propel power you know what i mean you're like oh and then right when you stop you're like suddenly just jacked up and can do
0:50 a lot you know what i'll i'll be honest sometimes i sometimes i don't like i don't come just because i know that if i do i'm gonna be i'm gonna be ████ i'm gonna be tired for a little bit so you go you go into it sometimes i'll go into a session and then i'll be like you know what ████ it i gotta do ████ i don't stop how many minutes you sound conflicted [Laughter] no it's not that it's just literally like i'm gonna be tired so but you say that in the middle while you're going or before and you you go how do you do a little bit how do you do the mental you turn that it's also like right right before you come and then you could stop so you just start thinking of your youth pastor or something like practice that too okay but after effects genuinely though just not tired because i feel like that's like um
1:41 trying to just delete the negative versus okay usually like usually two minutes comes out of his trailer all jacked usually two minutes later i'll just ████ ejaculate and come you know ten is here again huh the heavyweight champion has been speaking ahead of his upcoming title defense against dylan white which will be taking place on april 23rd aka this is an ad for that apparently the gypsy king semi jokingly believes that masturbation gives him the required power in his hands to knock out his opponent by loading up on testosterone scientifically makes sense do you load
2:31 more testosterone for expending your body that's why i said there's a giant there's testosterone in our semen i have no idea it doesn't taste like it [Laughter] right i read a study where sex increases testosterone the hormone because having sex but then i don't know if masturbation activates the same thing as having sex because when you're with a woman or like you know you're just ████ and you know let's not be gender biased so so would it just be in our minds what if gay sex actually boosted higher tissue it does let me tell you it does it does dude at the same time how do you think ████ look double testosterone i don't know what i'm doing i never even well maybe they need to do this study but they did the yeah dude i bet if you jack off like three times a day that's
3:22 like no effect but you do seven you probably get some effect that's not an effect on your body some way yeah seven times or not i think you do seven times of anything a day seven times you know how many naps i'm gonna be at dude that's like to me that's like high school jack off time this guy is are you alone that many times like he's probably doing it in public yeah maybe he doesn't have to be alone he's with his coaches and they're talking about the game plan he's just jacking off he's like sorry by the fifth time i'm just busting dust you know aren't you so tired you can't jump rope anymore too his legs are weird there's no way you're jump roping after seven times he doesn't look like a guy who jump ropes he doesn't he doesn't look like he just all boxes jump rope he's light on his feet dude he's a big boy i think it must be
4:12 one of those things where six times and you're ████ tired but the seventh time you unlock a special thing yeah and it just like you think it's like uh like uh the runner's high you know what i'm talking about or it's like seconds or something once you get to a certain level it's like you run like two three miles you're like really tired you're on like five six miles suddenly you have runners hiding so it's a battle of grit every day he doesn't want to jack off seven times a day but he knows he has to do it yeah that's what it is but doesn't i thought everyone could sleepy you do but in the second time that's when you get the globe that's when you're this tier you know what i mean but when you're tyson fury you know you got to reach an upper echelon of masturbation level because i remember maybe we should try this seven times thing is that is that championship level maybe it's seven masturbation is that what that is do you think all of our athletes are championships i'm gonna google that yeah look that up i don't know his routine i want to know how what he like does
5:02 what he watches what do you like right-handed jerk off he literally told you he doesn't even box masturbations in japan is it yeah so it's a real thing championship for that maybe it's like who jacks off the most or whatever i mean it better be that what else i don't want to go there sorry all right anyways he says tyson fury says got to keep that blood pumping baby the only thing i have been loading is testosterone from all the winning over the years right hands and left hands depending on what i feel like that's pretty tight that's pretty much i dexter dude he's trolling it's funny give me a break he's throwing it he's getting clicks for the fight come on um i'm sure he's trolling but at the same time yeah that could be yeah he could do this this is the first time that fury has claimed that having a a wink has helped him at his craft so i mean it must be a
5:53 consistent joke do you think he's trying to get into the mind of his opponent and then they're like well if he does that i'm gonna try that and then he's gonna beat off yeah and then after we're not when he's when he's fighting he's like yo man that technique didn't work my legs do you think he's in the do you think he's in the ring and he's like can't we just jack off that's why that's what i've been doing what have you been doing oh let's talk about jacking off how we're going to beat our dick that'd be funny if his his boxing gloves is like shaped to like hold a dick up there's a hole like it's perfect so that right between rounds he's like imma get you man hold on i can't wait till i start seeing pro fap videos on youtube because you know like there's no problem that was now they're going to go through this whole pro fab move that sounds like a league watch it becomes a league
6:44 knowing dudes they're probably going to start breaking it down association pfa pro flap association if they have like a pillow fighting league like a legit pillow fighting league they do have that they're going to have a jack off league too i think i think that's next do you guys know about joi porn what's that jackoff instructionals oh yeah when the girl's going like this she goes yeah you gotta go up and down so they're just bossing you around they're telling you how to jerky yeah they're just they're basically just like it's like simon says but yeah ████ shows around kids i think i take offense to jack off instructions for kids to learn yeah i think i know how to do this yeah yeah i got this sweetheart thank you i mean i guess it could be if you're ████ that irresponsible with a ████ internet i don't need a woman telling me how to touch myself okay you don't have a dick i do the video so you just totally go against what they
7:34 say you just yell back out girl that's not how it feels yeah it's like internet trolls will do they watch instruction video they're like she obviously doesn't know she's talking about oh great woman who doesn't have a penis tell us how to use our penis there should be more men's rights activists in there talking ████ to them the problem is is that they they've come already so they're more chill oh yeah they're way more like yeah i think the entire porn industry is a men's rights activist group well no no the men's rights guys are the guys who are like they're like really against jerking off because it like ruined their lives or something and and and women ruined their lives too so like it's it's a bunch of things working together they're they're the ones fighting against feminism should we get to ask an
8:26 expert of a men's right activity oh we should dude and just ask them questions just to be like what are you talking about just put joe here yeah it's a men's rights act they really exist yeah yeah that's pretty heavy i would put them up there with male like i think what's worse what's worse male feminism because they're just doing it to get late at least at least we know the men's rights guys are never getting late and they're getting zero positions dude i actually saw i saw a real male feminist a i saw one in the flesh guess out of all places where ████ hollywood eating at a thai restaurant on a ████ date right next to me it was so good the conversation was so ████ good that i couldn't even eat my meal i was just laughing the whole time just pulled up a chair next ████ you were just overhearing like what he was saying yeah he was basically
9:16 talking ████ about women while he was talking good about them it was the most bizarre ████ he's all like well you know how women are they're like this and this and this but in my studies you know like and then he would use that ████ buzzword my studies he's talking about i think the future is female and like you know obviously men have been in charge for so long like it's time to be emotional in government isn't it time to be more emotional in government spaghetti he's eating a bag of dicks dude ████ that dude right out of the bag it was so inauthentic like it was it was he was just constantly using these buzzwords to try to win her over and and you know he's like this pseudo-intellectual and he's also like talking down at her like oh yeah you know well from you know with with my intellect and my understanding of intellect
10:06 because you know i can psychoanalyze myself and yeah this same age and it's like ████ for real yeah he probably just slayed her that night hero ████ bro this was his move no this was this move now she was eating it up because of the type of girl she was i think she was the one that wanted to believe this guy was real she's a chelsea because she had rainbow hair she was she did have colored hair yeah shocking she was one of those girls i think that were like not interesting but then like it's like they try to be a part of that hollywood world to be an artist but then like not really you know what i mean like it's just the it's just yeah the pretending of being an actor but not really an actor yeah meanwhile they're going home they're like you see that ████ asian guy with longer students laughing by himself the
10:56 whole time what a ████ weirdo eating alone laughing by himself [Laughter] yeah the restaurant's a bag of dicks everyone's eating bags here so so this was feminist night so this was his move he paid for the meal right and he grabs her hand and he goes you're damned if you do and you've damned if you don't you know when men pay for it it's like oh my god they're the patriarchy but uh sometimes i just i just i just feel like i gotta do it if i don't do it then i'm i'm a loser i'm broke or what if this is a tinder date and then i'm just like what if he's a tinder swindler why does he have this why does he have to say that just ████ pay for it like a normal human being because he knows you're listening he wants to make you laugh yeah
11:47 he's like this guy's listening to me right now he's a big fan did this chick say anything or is this guy like ████ psychoanalyzing all his ████ she basically he basically talked over her the whole time yeah this guy is dope she should be here minions too i was just like oh yeah that makes sense i was like listening and you know like sometimes when you're listening you're also responding in your head and you're not saying her points and i was like oh yes yeah that makes sense yeah you might hear me ████ like tom yum shrimp you know what i mean with crispy rice yeah i'm hungry now yeah yeah dude ████ i'm so convinced the guy was joe yeah that's pretty good joe's just talking to hannah [Music]
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