0:00 [Music] all right you all know that we love Mickey D up in here oh bro you just said the name and I tasted the fries yes sir we love Mickey brainwashing is but did y'all know that McDonald's has created a spin-off chain restaurant that they are cosmic Cosmic what is it what is it okay is this an Amer # ad no I'm just kidding a cafe of some sort okay so it's kind of like a Sonic they're trying to take over uh trying to fight Starbucks aren't they really no way I thought that was be Cafe I think that's a very strong that's what I heard too though I heard the same thing just relax I heard the same thing yeah I thought it was like you know what we're going to start we're going to tackle another ████ industry now well
0:52 I see a lot of Starbucks shutting down so you don't have to worry too much McDonald themselves they're competing with each other across the street that's true okay so a press release by McDonald's earlier this week described Cosmic as quote a new small format beverage Le concept that's truly out of this world inspired by Nostalgia and powered by a menu of bold refreshing Beverages and tasty treats Cosmic is landing earthside for us humans to enjoy Cosmic seamlessly Blends brand new otherworldly beverage creations with a small lineup of food including a select few McDonald's favorites thank God all designed to boost your mood into the stratosphere if only for a few moments it does kind of feel like Sonic that's what I'm saying yeah but why why do they come out of roller blades it's drive-thru only do they come out with roller blades though no they and huge titties that's no drive-thru and they come out with roller blades wait which Sonics has the huge titties in what's
1:43 that about San Antonio it's drive-thru only s s only a drivethru the Big Bloomers the Dutch Bros model kind of no Victoria Secret at sanor yeah I've never been to a Dutch Bros that's not ████ popping bro I went to the most popping one recently I had no idea it was going to be this freaking popping it was into uh Oceanside and yo the line was like four lanes fully backed up it looked like an In-N-Out times like three D and it's mainly coffee yeah but like they have like other drinks like frozen slushy fruit this it's a lot of dessert coffees yeah dessert coffees so maybe that's the exact demo that they're trying to Target yeah could be is it is it a coffee place no because like all right their main drinks at they call them exotic sour
2:35 cherry energy slush that's what makes you feel like Sonic tropical spice Aid s'mores cold brew as well as edible treats like MC pops pretzel bites Savory hash brown bites and the spicy queso sandwich these are like a lot of signature things that are like the front not McDonald's it feels like Starbucks and Dutch Bros had a baby cut and million milk she think about Savory hash brown bites take like a McDonald's hash brown cut them up in smaller bit bits me bro tater tots if it's the same tasting hash browns I would love those and they got big te ladies coming out that's big on roller blades in a driveth big titty lady chasing your car as you go through the drivethru they're they're bouncing around come trying that's what I miss is you know I wasn't a part of this era but I would imagine that they marketed beautiful ladies coming out and working and stuff but like now you just
3:27 got like immigrants W just immigrants immigrants are the inverse of beautiful ladies yeah it's just so that's what it looks like the first one is opened up in Illinois doesn't look appetizing though so they can't see it yeah that's a throwback method you can see the the golden arches in the corner so you know it's a McDonald's franchise and it's called Cosmic I like the name how it's like to very good I don't mind The Branding either it looks like a like a I don't know like a vintage soof or something I mean it's not well from a business point of view it's not meant to be the same as like McDonald's they already have 40,000 Plus locations they're just trying to cover an entirely different demographic because they can you know what I mean what's going to have to happen to McDonald's when they just can't McDonald anymore they have to make it's hard to imagine a world without them man no I mean like as in like they're like all right we literally have a McDonald's in
4:17 Antarctica we can't McDonald anymore there's no more locations right then they have to Cosmic that's what they're getting ready for I see look think about this they got something called MC Pops that come in three different flavors cookie butter apple cinnamon and hazelnut you can get a blueberry ginger boost you can get a creamy avocado tomatillo sandwich like there's just a bunch of ████ so not coffee at all there's a couple ones like that s'mores coffee yeah there s'mores cold brew ████ like thatof dud MFE is pretty solid couple yeah look like Sonic he's right it feels like so this is like it shows I know this is very small but it shows like Iced Teas and lemonades it shows signature Galactic boost damn it's it's like in Jamba territory Berry hibiscus sour I'll tell you this there's nothing jby about it there's a churro frap churro frap don't push
5:07 him it doesn't know what it wants to be yeah that's the thing it's like too many things it's too many things turmeric spice latte turmeric you gay hey do they have Boba anywhere on there see now you going into that like Health category no whoa they're confused man dude they lizards popping pear slush oh that's their way of calling it Boba huh don't don't hey honestly I'd be down to try it though I'm down I'm down down boy I'd be down to try it for sure I'll try it for sure but but I don't like those drinks though cuz I'm loyal to McDonald's but I think they're trying to do too much like if they did a coffee shop like a like a maafe yeah something like that I think that' be TI dedicated just forast no but just like with all this other dedicated Cafe but like what do you need it for they already have the coffee at the McDonald's I thought it was competing with Starbucks this when someone told me
5:57 about it that's what McDonald's mcafe is already trying to do but in Europe they have a standalone M Cafe they have they have espresso machines and they have like pastries and stuff Cafe other countries is different though and they took McDonald's in other countries hit different they took [Laughter] Bitcoin e flavored we were able to go to the uh France McDonald's and then you know the kiosk cuz they hate like employees in France so then like when you went and then you go would you like a take a bigger Bitcoin that's how they huh lightning Network I heard Jad clear I mean look if it's made by McDonald's I'm down to try it I'll go ████ find a random flavor or some whatever you have you tried everything at McDonald's currently yeah yeah every single thing
6:49 you've had like all the fish I think all the whenever there's like a like the MC rib everything yeah that's pretty cool I mean name it you tried every single thing no not if you're going to say it like that I haven't tried the ethereum burger I had a MCB the other day I think I've tried everything the MCB is back don't ████ with me dog but you know what though it's ████ up because it just feels like they assembled the MC rib like the worst way possible it looks like they just threw it in the ████ box dude like the bottom it is back that's just America that's America if it is what they're really doing that makes it tight again yeah like when I open d i open up it look like just splatters everywhere and I was like what the you just gave SAR the way they make McDonald's in other countries is like Like a Surgeon done sure dropping it from a ladder America's for show like no do you think that like a manager goes
7:40 up to somebody who's like doing that they put it down like that like why aren't you chucking why aren't you chucking yeah put some velocity on that arm yeah let's get some side that ████ I remember I got a six piece chicken nuggets from McDonald's here and then when I opened it it was a it was a chicken patty just one real chicken patty what that really happened to you and I was like they're so high would be on and then you check the and then you check the bag the bag had the bun as ████ it was just I was like dude and they always ████ up and they're always high like their eyes are just bloodshot and they're like oh chicken nugget uh you just ate it like that I didn't even eat it I was just laughing like I was like ████ dude you didn't I had hamburgers and other stuff you didn't reverse and go like hey what's up with this and then they pull a gun on
8:32 you it was too late I was back at the office Tac Bell oh my bad Taco Bell's more ganga Taco balls are trash I've seen a lot of those vids great it's like it's like Starbucks though McDonald's is like Starbucks where it's like there's such a huge name in franchise that if they throw out some attempt it's still probably going to taste kind of good it's interesting at least yeah yeah even if it doesn't hit it's still kind of going to be dank also In Our Lifetime have they ever done something similar to this no not in our lifetime that makes it cool to me man when at Starbucks if you're like hey so I ordered the Turkey um uh sandwich thing with the egg whites and there's no turkey bacon you know what I mean the the employees aren't like they're not like you know they're like they're like I'll ████ Sue I'll ████ sue you I have a lawyer and you're like oh Jesus I don't want to
9:22 deal with I will say the first time McDonald's ever did the McFlurries that was like way out that was pretty M flurry wow did you ever did you ever try the mix salad shakers I did oh yeah you remember them remember those you have to shake it I tried it once and never got it again or the chicken select the snack wraps were sick though yeah snack wraps snack they're I'm telling you McDonald's they can very they can do very little wrong they got crispy chicken now they got the crispy chicken sandwiches that's what they and they have the McChicken too double they still do the southern one that was good I still got that the best thing they do period is in in breakfast time they do the the the sausage burritos oh I love those you know I'm a McGriddles fan I like McGriddles too sausage mles I get both point of cosmics if only at cosmics they make the fries with the original
10:13 lard do they really they need to bring it back if they did if they did they need to stop using canola oil I'll drive out of state I'll drive the Florida do you think they'll ever like you know how this whole movement of no more seed oils like everyone's switching oh I see like yeah like do you think do you think it'll ever go back to large well that's kind of I think there's a slight chance because remember how we were all about um what's it called we were all doing Plastics on paper and they were like no the trees save the trees so we moved on to Plastics and now they're like plastic Save the Ocean Save the Ocean now we're back to paper y I could see fries going back to lard I'm telling youal see in those Tik Tok videos about how like McDonald's most Fries Are Made though is like kind of sketch but I'm still down for them they're delicious what you
11:03 talking about they're talking about the type of potato that they need and the way that they bleach them I and they have to use like a toxic chemical on it once in a while you're allowed a little bit of plastic sure yeah eat it I'm just saying see them it's like oh damn sket I don't give a ████ if they coat it in ████ yeah meth make it look better paint it put nail polish on the fries I'll eat it even nowadays when I see those videos I'm like I don't even believe this ████ either I don't believe none of it dude yeah ████ p████'s awesome yeah they would never do that to me that's what I
11:53 say
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