0:05 Welcome back to another What what should I call this feminist episode of Careful Boys? Returning Returning a new leaf. Believe all women. All of them? All of them. Sorry. Yeah, I didn't hit Smacks Colleen. I didn't hit her. Don't believe her. I didn't do it. He hit Colleen. He hit her. I did not. All right, what are some movies that if you were to reboot them with an all-female cast would actually be good? Oh, that's a good one. Ghostbusters. Okay. Did you see the all-female remake? Was it good? wild. What about the Ocean's 11 one with all ladies? Did you have I didn't watch it. You guys watched it? They watched it? They made one? It's Ocean's 8, right? It's decent. I heard it wasn't good. Was it all right? People complained about it. But I didn't see it. So it's like I
0:55 think anytime there's an all-female cast, everyone's really mad about it. It's hard when you're Are there any that are already good that were like cuz I know like the only ones we know of I think offhand are the ones that ended up bad. But are there some that are Well, thinking about like all-female cast, you think of like What's the baseball one? Charlie's Angels. The League of Their Own. The League of Their Own. I think people think about that a lot of like yo, that's a ████ sick movie. sick movie. And nobody b██████ about it either cuz that was like the story. Yeah, that's the story already. Yeah. Bridesmaids is sick. Bridesmaids is ████ hilarious. But we're talking about what would look good or what would still be good if you change it to all And and how would you change it to like make it good? Saving Private Ryan. Oh, ████ no. Super pissed, dude. Jesus, Joe. Because D-Day women can do it, too. Yeah.
1:45 Oh, that's sick. That's a slogan? D-Day, women can do it, too. But something Talk about something that would really piss off a lot of people. Yeah, a lot of women D-Day with all women, that'd be so sick. D-Day, women can do it. That's the tag, yo. You want to do D-Day. It's like something about it better. They say that. Women on the front lines being slaughtered does not feel well. Yeah. It doesn't work. For some reason, guys, it's okay. Like violence toward guys, I think everyone's just like you're dispensable. But when it's like a ton of women just like getting shot up and blown up, you're just like I don't like this AT ALL. YEAH. I DON'T THINK IT WORKS. THERE'S SOMETHING ABOUT THAT THAT'S really sad.
2:36 I've never imagined that in my entire life. Yeah, nobody wants to see that, dude. It's kind of like when you see even like when I watch like UFC Yeah. like guys, I'm like yeah. And then when the girls do it, I'm like When they're getting clobbered. too sure about this, guys. It's like this is kind of this is kind of brutal, you know? If they were wearing aprons, it kind of works. In my opinion. My note. I actually saw a boxing match where girls were hella good at boxing and they were topless. What the ████ Swear to god. I SWEAR. AND THEY WERE ACTUALLY GOOD AT DUDE, TOPLESS, they both got probably A's cuz it's sharp. And then but they were ████ young young. Dude, I'm telling you right now, dude, these guys Better with a sports bra so their titties aren't ████ dangling everywhere. That's the whole point.
3:26 Oh, the point is to sexualize it. I see. It's kind of funny because I looked at the background like who's the crowd? It was just old dudes and a lot of girls. I'm uncomfortable. A's is not I mean, come on, dude. No, I'm just saying But I'm 39 years old. I can't be looking at A's. Yeah, we're not excited about those anymore. Dude, these girls are really good at I've been in the titty game at too long for the A's, man. So maybe Rocky then? Rocky with with with a wimp a female cast? But they have to be topless. That's what he said. No, I was just saying I would watch that video. We were somewhere in that subject, right? So I was just like I watched that I thought there was a female boxer movie. There is. Right? Million Dollar Baby. That's the one. See, I was literally getting out of my head cuz I was thinking okay, what if they did Enough? What if they did Enough but they flipped it where is the wife was beating up on like a really scrawny like
4:16 measly man right? And he was like trying to I don't think people are ready for that. They're not ready for that? No way, huh? That would probably That's a stupid idea. Society Society's not ready to admit that that's a real thing. He gets verbally abused and he's just like a shell of himself. They don't actually speak up about like domestic violence against them and then people just laugh at them. Yeah. Well, dude, we There's so many videos now of it. There's so many videos of dudes getting wailed on by the chicks in public. So many. And I laugh at all of them. I can't help it. Yeah, it's kind of funny. What a ████ You say that. Yeah, I do. Yeah. It's better if guys just don't complain about that. What's What's your stance on that? What do you mean? Don't complain, man. Just walk out. So what if Oh, but what what if it's happening to you? If your chick's swinging on you every day you come home. Figure it out. Yeah, how do you do There's some There's some crazy girls out there. No, I believe it. I'm just saying at the end of the day as a as a man, you should just figure it out. Yeah, like beat their ass, huh? Yeah, domestic violence.
5:08 I I say as a man, don't talk about it. Put that away. Just find her pattern. Huh? Yeah. Exactly. defend those shots. You're not trying hard enough. She's telegraphing every punch. Come on. If you come to the door in full hockey regalia Yeah. I think that's pretty strong. No, it's just freaking Isn't Million Dollar Baby a boxing movie with a girl in it? Yeah, dude, that was a crazy one. Oh, oh, I Yeah, it's like a bad time at the movies. Why is it that um female like those like G.I. Jane and and that like Why is it movies pre-COVID of females in a like role just like overcoming obstacles? Why are they so much better than the COVID era films? not horny. Judging wasn't that corny. Oh. Like she was actually like a It seemed like a real person going through
5:58 a real issue. It was like now it's like, you know I feel like it's lazy writing now cuz like you Not not just for women but like when they throw a minority in a role or whatever, it's lazy writing where there's no um it's not a human character. It's just just It's like why does this person have to be Asian? Yeah. It could be anybody. But the Cuz you got to check those boxes. Yeah. But I I It's kind of those female characters like I think Wonder Woman is one of them where I'm like it could have been so much better if she was flawed. But she was so ████ perfect that there was no you're not rooting for an underdog. And then it's almost like they can't be an underdog cuz then if they're flawed, then that means they're not good or perfect. What kind of flaw should Wonder Woman have? She should be diabetic. That's sick. That's really good. What if she had
6:50 SHE'S LIKE ████ I NEED INSULIN. SO I DON'T KNOW. OH, she's part god? Yeah. My blood sugar's getting low, you know. Fight a bad guy. That's probably why she's perfect. the first movie was good though. First one was solid. It was good, right? But the second one was Second one was wack as absolute ████ Maybe it was the second Well, I forgot which one it was but I was looking at her character and I was like why am I not invested? Like there's no real arc of someone that's like gone through some I actually like the villain more because I understood her like female incelness where she was like going through this hard ████ She's being picked on. She's like always being this passive person and then she's like oh, ████ that. Well, I'm going to take it out on you guys. So like I understood that character much more. Cheetah? Yeah, the Yeah, the Kristen Wiig's character? Yeah, the one that was Well, no, is it Cheetah the I think I think it
7:41 was the black girl. No, it was the girl the the Yeah, the the one that turned into a spider, I think. She turned into a cat. You thought Cheetah turned into a spider? I mean, that's tight. It's a better option. It's way more unexpected Yeah, yeah, yeah. A spider? HER NAME IS CHEETAH BUT IT TURNED INTO A BAT. A BAT, YEAH. So if you had to do a war movie and you had to make it all women, what would the plot be? Nurses. Nurses? They would never be soldiers? I don't like Okay, this is I think when when all they do is just replace it with females but it's just like all dudes like a special ops team or whatever, right? And I'm like I want it to be like something that they already dominate in but a good story in it.
8:31 Instead of it being like why do you have to force this like thing that's kind of like so hard to believe. You know what's corny to you? I think I do agree with a lot of people who are like it's really corny when you see Black Widow for example like flipping 300 lb dudes all all over the place. It's just corny. It's not realistic. Just give her a superpower cuz I don't worry about that when I'm watching Wonder Woman kick ass. Don't choreograph it that way. Make it more believable. Yeah, that's that's what it is more. It's the choreography. Like like Atomic Blonde was that way. Like I was watching Vikings. These guys are not going to get hit by that. I haven't seen it. It's a It's kind of like Atomic Blonde. It's kind of like Red Sparrow but way better. Not not as snooze festy. You guys It's It's more believable. Yeah. You guys seen Vikings? No. Okay, so like
9:22 there's a weird season where they get hella like like we got to really press press this like female stuff or whatever, right? But um it's not believable because they don't have actually like capable strong women that can lift things wielding a sword. They have these like petite girls that are like 90 lb and their axe looks bigger than their body. So their body they don't even move like fit. So I'm like I wish what they did was actually get fit ass women. Yeah, sure. Cuz it's believable. They look jacked. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Have them eat some eggs. There's this where they're like running uphill to like do battle and then all of them were out of breath and ████ So it's like, come on, what the ████ Yeah, yeah. It's like that movie Sucker Punch. Remember Sucker Punch?
10:12 That was whack one, too. These girls all weigh 115 lb and they're like kicking everything's ass. It was so aesthetically there. I was so sad that it didn't like live up to how it looked. You like that movie, though? No, I like how it I like the presentation. Oh, we did a story here on JK about like these two, I think Jewish chicks, that like dressed up as like Nazi soldiers and and they would like ride on scooters and like assassinate guards and stuff. That's cool. Like see, that would be a cool ass ████ movie, you know? There's actually a story about I think it was some Polish girls that would lure Nazi soldiers into the forest. Maybe I'm wrong. And then they Well, yeah, I think they were Jewish, Polish, whatever, like like half half, you know? Okay. Yeah. And then and then they would lure them into the forest like, you want to ████ Nazi boy? And they'd be like, oh, guten tag. And then as soon as they're there,
11:02 ambush, boom boom, they would ████ kill them. Are you speaking English? You want to ████ Nazi boy? Now that's good writing. See? Dude, that is true. That's sick cuz it's like you're really like it's a real story. That's what it is. It's a real ████ story that happened. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's believable. Mhm. Because dudes are dogs and they will get Yeah, they'll get honey potted, right? And it's the same thing. She's She's a ████ double agent. Dude, there was a sick ass There was a made for TV movie I saw a long time ago about like these Jewish rebels during the war. And David Schwimmer was one of them. And then there was this girl and then So like they had like a rebel force of like six people. It's kind of like Red Dawn where it's like they're fighting against the faction, whatever. Six of them and
11:52 they have to be really creative about how they fight. So the girl, rather than like just make her unbelievably strong or amazing shot, she she thinks of this idea to like tie a rope around her waist and then tie the other side of the rope to the chimney of the roof and she runs around the roof so that she doesn't fall off and she keeps throwing Molotovs at guys. Wow. How freaking sick is that? That's cool. That's an old one. That's sick. It's an old like 90s made for TV movie. But I was like the whole movie I'm like this bored and then when that happened I went IQ. Yeah. That ████ was tight. You'll be a great ass movie if it was replaced by all women. Tears of the Sun. Tears of the Sun? Why? I was about to watch that the other day. I've never seen that. Is that where they make a solar powered car? No, come on. Joe, you know what Tears of the Sun is.
12:42 Think it up. Tears of the Sun. Nobody watched Tears of the Sun? Nah, bro. What the It's a Vietnam war movie. Come on, stop stop Vietnam. It's a new It's a Vietnam war movie. No, it's a ████ Africa, the Congo. Yeah, they're like Navy SEALs that go into Africa, they're trying to save Bruce Willis? Yes, with Bruce Willis. Ah, that's the one that he sued them cuz he got hit in the head. Oh, that's probably why. Yeah, he sued them for being conked in the in the dome. That's probably why he is the way he is now. Oh my god. Wait, so why would that be so Why would that be good women? What happens in that movie? Dude, wait, he never watched it? I don't know if I watched You can't explain it because he hasn't seen it? You could explain it. You know, think about it. Yo, think about it. Think about it. Think about it. They Their mission is to go save the US citizen, which is the the USA girl, Right? Are they the POWs
13:33 or something? No, she's a doctor and she she's helping out the you know, the African in the village. Oh, they're trying to extract Yeah. So as you see, you know, they know what's coming towards them, which is like to execute all Christianity because there's she's also with the Christian missionaries. So at the end of the day they said, yo, you're important, we got to go grab you out. So these like six dudes come out to extract her. I'd say it would have been tight if it was females cuz I was like, dude, if it's females, they could have played a part. Oh, and the the spy Yeah, and then and for example, if they do happen to run across those you know, those terrorists or Congo dudes, they could play, you know, Kind of like Linus. Honey pot. In a way. But then when ████ hits the fan, all they got to do is take off the dress and it would have been like full gear vest and ████ I think that would have been a couple A's coming out of there.
14:25 I mean, you wouldn't see it. You wouldn't see it. Tears of the Sun. Combined right here. Intersect. Tears of the That would you you would be you I'd be interested, depending. But as soon as they hold the gun wrong, I probably be not interested. Oh, when they hold the gun wrong? Cuz I noticed a lot of like girl actors that they just hold the rifles completely wrong. So I'm just like, I'm done. I'm done. Huh? Did they hold it right for Sicario? Sicario was lit. Sicario's That's a good movie. Sicario is top tier. So good. You know what's wrong with the whole like lazy writing woke ████ It's like there's already sick ass stories of women or other minority like in their culture or whatever, right? But instead of doing that, all they do is make Little Mermaid black or whatever. Yeah. Or like it's like they already got a movie going on. It's like, we're going to do Aladdin, but in instead, we're
15:15 going to make him trans. And it's like that's What the ████ Why? Aladdin? I'm listening. Yeah. I kind of fire trans Aladdin. I think the If you're going to remake a ████ a Disney movie, you might as well change something about it cuz it's all so boring anyway and ████ Same format. Let's let's change it. They made the same movies. It's the same movie, it's live action. Like do something about it cuz you know exactly be like shot for shot, same ████ movie. Make Simba Chris Rock for all I care. You know what I mean? Like make it more interesting. But that's what the Snow White movie feels like to me. It feels like let's take a a movie and make it more women. You know, it's already like woman based. Except I find that actress unbearable. Yeah, it's because of all the ████ she said during press junkets. She's unbearable. Also, too, though, you can't have the queen be that hot. Gal Gadot is the queen and then that chick is the She's
16:06 envious of her beauty. I'm like, brother, Gal Gadot is Gal Gadot could wake up on a ████ Monday morning looking better than this chick, right? There's just nothing we can do about it. That lead actress did a bunch of Instantly rejected this premise. interviews where she's talking about like, oh, it's refreshing that it gets this reboot that it's no longer about the man rescuing the damsel in distress and like kind of just making a a whole thing about how like thank god it's not a whole thing where the guy saves the day. And people are just like, does Can it just be a good movie? He just kisses her. He doesn't even do anything. He just kisses her. Is that Snow White? I don't know if he saved the day. He doesn't save the day. He just kisses her, she wakes up. Because it's true love, guys. He kills the dragon. Isn't there a dragon in that one? No. No, that's in Sleeping Beauty. That's Fantasmic you're thinking of. Snow White There's no dragon. There's no
16:56 dragon. Snow White, she's a It's Dr. Dolittle. Yeah, it's the witch with the apple. And she talks to animals and ████ Right, right, right. That's the one I watched the least. And they did all the CGI, too. the dwarf community that that is like the professional actors Yeah, they all got fired, right? Well, they're they're upset that they're not getting roles anymore because of the you know, they're being seen it like as demeaning to give them that role. So they're like, but we would love it. Yeah. Yeah. Come on. That was like what, seven roles out of seven, eight? And Jack Black Jack Black's phone won't hang up, dude. He can't hang it up. He's like, will you be all the dwarves? He's like, YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. HE'S GOT SEVEN different phones. they didn't end up changing their minds on that? They they didn't hire like actual like You see the You see the trailer, it looks crazy. It's all CGI. Fake little
17:47 people, you know? Next Next year will be actors in wheelchairs. They're going to get CGI'd out, too. They will. I promise they will. That's crazy. That's so sad. Who's watching those things anyway? Um Are people actually watching it? The Disney movies? No, I mean like Yeah, well, the parents have to choose it and then show it to the kids, right? Just go with the animated one, bro. The classics. Can't miss. Plus we probably already own it. I was talking to this little kid the other day. He's 5 years old. He was like, you know my favorite movie is? I was like, what? He's like, Robin Hood, the animated one. And I was like, oh, no way. The original one. I was like, yo, and I was like I was like, you have no idea what this is, but I have it on VHS, brother. And he's like, cool. What if He's like, what's that? Yeah, he's like he was talking about What if he was talking about Men in Tights? That was good. Oh, Robin Men in Tights is great. Achoo. Do that one with all female cast.
18:38 I'll watch that. Hey, that would actually be pretty funny. The cartoon Robin Hood slept on for sure. The best part of that ████ was part. Absolutely. Clean, why do you hate women? Oh, I'll give you a long list. Mhm.
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