0:00 and you know it'll be like an actor from Asia you know well I want to rumble Jack breakfast [Music] um you know the James Bond novels written by Ian Fleming like the original ones right so they're written back in about seven years ago was the first one Casino Royale remember that one yep yeah um they're all being Rewritten now oh no please don't tell me it's too late in order to protect modern readers who might be triggered by some oh no oh man we're gonna do the King James version of them is he gonna is he is is James Bond Gonna Be Like A different race it's gonna be a non
0:50 -bies boy no like we AK because I feel like those when when written and adapted for screen have already at those moments in time taken on Modern like uh who's getting who's getting who's getting pissed off when they read octopussy yeah that's crazy you know what I mean like who's going oh my God Octopussy what was the premise of octopus marine biologists whose uh idea is it some woke ass ████ we have an estate though because the way that I was thinking I was like is that ████ dead in Fleming no but they have an estate that control his family control they they have approval so like when before Daniel Craig was chosen as James Bond they have approval oh like to say like yes no because when I look at it through the lens of I love the original and I don't want to touch
1:41 things like you don't ████ go to the Mona Lisa and start scribbling all over that ████ right you're like you make a new one that's the way it is if I look at it through that Lance I'm like don't ████ touch those goddamn books they're perfect but if I look at it through the lens of cha-ching and I'm Ian Fleming I'm like oh you're gonna rewrite it for me and I make more money and pay me more okay everybody go crazy yeah and again rewriting is not necessarily like change the plots or anything like that it's like hey drop the end bombs and say black drop the visit again like I said who says that what version are you watching I'm talking about the double seven it's wild we're talking about the same funny books but that's like that's like rewriting history that's like that's like changing like Huck Finn and like all the other Classics they're just Banning it oh yeah that's different this is so that it doesn't get better is there anything like I have a question I think Bart's right in the
2:31 aspect of hey either you guys get all your books banned or we can rewrite them and make money yeah because that's his next got a question guys how many racial slurs does 007 use again don't take the film adaptations no of course of course in the movie I'm talking about in the book did he say something mean to Baron Cemetery so for example I didn't know there was an n-word in that book did he did he call I'll drop a ████ listen here you little chick I'm not throw your goddamn hats at me it wasn't Michelle yo the first Asian uh Bond girl yeah wow and I think in the first in the first version he called her ████ really yeah I have no idea he's like both James how old nothing surprised me I can't resist a good chick
3:23 stupid work is set to be republished in April making 70 years since Casino Royale the first book in the series uh Ian Fleming Publications limited commissioned a review by sensitivity readers leading many novels in the series to be Rewritten that's a horrible committee sensitivity readers sorry that's a horrible sensitivity even like it's like a committee of blue hair ████ oh yeah I get my feelings hurt like crazy you're higher yeah my boyfriend hates me you're high I have no friends you're higher your name's Janice you're hired yeah hey it's who used to be a hall monitor me you're all hired you you're you is it is a good point though it's like when you think of these things changing it isn't always that they're being regulated against it
4:14 is the ultimate say of whoever wrote the book to be like yeah I would like to make more money yeah so it's true that you can't really get mad it's they're the ones going oh I can't be in these stores or on these platforms unless I change I'll change yep it's true is there any examples of just problematic stuff that they say in there it literally says like each book will say it out loud read it and we'll make an announcement in character and we're in a British accent just so I can kind of get a better feeling and then don't drop the r like leave it there what does it sound like then I I don't know he only speaks Korea so it says each book will now come with a disclaimer this book was written at a time when terms and attitudes which might be considered offensive by modern readers were commonplace why do we even have to write that is that like duh you
5:04 stupid ████ I feel like people that's the thing is are stupid ████ you can't blame them what about John Steinbeck stupid ████ reading whole books I don't think yeah what kind of ████ idiots reading a book but you think I mean I'm also guessing they're sitting on the sidelines and they're looking at things like Casablanca getting banned and they're like oh yeah yeah they're it's preemptive it's preemptive yeah yeah wait Casablanca is getting black yeah you remember when uh yeah everything was just getting attacked because if it had any concept of any type of racial I mean what's wrong with Casablanca because if the but isn't how he speaks to the woman that's why no Cosmic there's a there's a also a black kind of helper oh I don't like this catering to the lowest common denominator ████ well I I was like putting like in front of every car you have a ████ sticker don't stand here when it's moving oh you stupid ████ don't give the
5:56 committee more ideas but have you noticed though it's all all the movies about like them being misogynistic allegedly or like against black people but have you have you noticed nothing about Breakfast at Tiffany's all right ever never they'll never fix that they'll never fix that's okay to take people's eyes back yeah yeah yeah see that was the Mickey Rooney right yeah yeah I was like oh yeah that guy's Asian that put us forward there's people still people still think that's an Asian guy that's why what's the name of The Walking Dead porno that they spoofed and then they couldn't find an Asian porn why are you asking us like they got a white guy they tipped his eyes back it was evil angel produced it damn they actually came to a show of mine during that whole time dude you just put us on game and you you acted like we're all supposed to know good I did I'm sorry it's like me saying you guys all have dick here well you don't oh sorry Walking Dead I don't know how they did
6:48 that one of my favorite movies you don't think it's a deep cut they taped their eyes back and I'm actually okay with it which one uh kickboxer you know Tang PO is actually Armenian really oh yeah yeah that's cool yeah that's cool right he's actually not right they they taped back tombow's ████ eyeballs now that you say that another classic movie did that too Remo Williams his master was Korean but he was a white played by a white guy and they kept his eyes back and they put all his makeup on and it was so good nobody knew just wait guys like 56 years from now maybe we'll start being like hey you can't do that and then everything will get canceled no or maybe we'll be we'll be a white guy and no one will know because it's reversed yeah like they made Walter with Roundup they tape our eyes up yeah hi my name is John yeah we play white
7:38 dudes that'd be cool would you like our Lumberjack breakfast it's a white term we're gonna say white phrases and you know it'll be like an actor from Asia you know I want the rumble Jack breakfast [Laughter] I love how it's like 20 years from now
8:30 and the technology is so better so this is what we gotta do we gotta remake Casablanca but we play all the roles and we all be white people and then we just open our eyes really big and with someone holding our eyes with a little slight Asian accent it's called the Casablanca dude I'm gonna get canceled my name is Jesus Rodriguez Casa brancas we just gotta remake all the movies that got canceled but with Asian actors that'd be hilarious then it'll work we do a mice and man um so so let me wait to not make any profit dude I think it's gonna it's gonna crash so for example
9:21 the mention of ethnicity for many Side characters has been removed in one passage where Bond knows the ethnicity of a Barman in Thunderball now as I mentioned in Goldfinger the ethnicity of the race of the drivers in the second world war Logistics unit the red ball Express have um had many black servicemen but now the race isn't included at all they're just referring to them as X drivers so isn't it worse to like erase all black people completely out of the book is it is it worth it for 50 years from now you know if it's not plot maybe it's just not plot relevant yeah in the new version but also they're like I don't understand any of this now they're kind of like period pieces right so like I think the dope thing about reading books is you're able to like put yourself in that time to kind of understand the space and then now like the any type of like tension or anything
10:12 like that it's like you you can't it's like it'd be like imagine like you take all context clues out of ████ Inglorious Bastards right and you're like I don't get why ████ Jews and Germans are even beefing [Laughter] and then she had to apologize for it wow so I mean that's Bart's just citing Whoopi Goldberg by the way yeah because books are literal time machines yeah they start erasing parts of it we're not gonna build a time it's a weird revision of History where instead of just showing how it was back then and studying that it's more like let's make it more palatable yeah we can't forget our history that's what's weird is that like nowadays it's like less and less that people should be educated on how to receive info yeah now it's like no let's
11:02 make it easy like let's go to the bottom idiot yeah and they're like revising everything to where it's weird because like so people don't like it that we were taught about Christopher Columbus in such a like PC way to the point where when we grew up we got the wrong history of what he actually did right so then if everyone's going to sugarcoat everything and like make it so peaceful and loving and woken or whatever then that means that we actually don't get the accurate way right how things used to be yeah yeah and then we let it slide more yeah you know if you talk about countries like certain countries like oh well they were known for this and then if you like whitewash it or you you PC eyes it or whatever then when they start to do it again no one can be like oh well they've been doing this to be fair though I mean human history has
11:54 constantly shown that we constantly erase human history yeah for real and we can't do that ████ we can't do that ████ we don't remember our history [Music] foreign
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