0:00 So, Reina, here at JK, we love to bond over um I guess our tumultuous upbringings. >> Tumul- That's a word. Wait, what say that one more time? >> Tumultuous. >> Tumultuous? Is that a real word? >> I may have made it up. I'm not sure. But, we've all had like some interesting ways that our parents either were emotionally manipulative, abusive, you know, things like that. Did you have a traditional Asian upbringing or would did you have a good one? >> I wouldn't say it would be like super traditional, but my dad was very overprotective to a point where he put chat logger on my computer and I had not known. And then he saw the unfiltered, unhinged conversation I had with boys. >> What? He's a hacker? I didn't know your father was a hacker. >> He He's a software engineer. He's very smart with computers. >> That's way That's a total different story if your parent actually knows computers.
0:50 >> What the ████ is a chat logger? >> You can see everything you type. >> Oh my god, that's >> That's hacker stuff, yeah. That's so >> Did you watch naughty pornos, too? >> [snorts] >> Yeah. >> But, he saw that, too. >> What kind of stuff was he seeing? >> You know, he did he didn't confront me a lot of it because just cuz, you know, he it'd be awkward and stuff, but as long like as long as I was being safe, he didn't really do anything. >> Oh, when did you find out he had that thing installed? >> Cuz he started He started like slipping like he [snorts] sets asked me a question. I'm like, "How did you know that?" You know, I kind of like suspected it, yeah. >> Little hints. >> Do you think a simple conversation would have helped you um if he just was more open about like don't ████ have uh
1:40 text sex with boys or like don't like message back when they send you a dick pic or whatever? >> I think I think it would be, but that goes into like most Asian households are just not openly expressive and communicative, right? >> was like that, too? >> Oh, yeah. Yeah, I mean, like we don't know how to talk to each other, >> Yeah. >> But how did you bring it up? It'd be like What are you doing in the back of a Celica? Like that? [laughter] >> Something like that, sure. >> Yeah, how did you find out? >> [laughter] >> Uh well, because I'm good with computers, too. So, then I kind of like had a suspicion. And then, so um I I hacked it back. >> So, you found that there was a chat log in your computer. >> Yeah. >> Wow. >> [sighs] >> This was like when you were in high school? Dang. That's when I said the worst ████ >> What about What about your mom? Is your mom uh What was she like?
2:30 >> Uh my mom is She's not a traditional Asian mom. She's just very religious. Um so >> What kind of religion? >> Uh she's Christian. >> Oh, okay. >> And then, she kind of She was very mean when I started learning about different religions in school and I started talking to her about it. And then, when I had She She uh in a uh understood it as me questioning Christianity when I was just curious about all these things I'm learning at school. So, then Yeah, she was just mean about that. But anything else, she's just >> So, you went to a public school? >> Yeah. >> Okay. >> Does your mom believe in evolution? >> Is that part of Christianity? >> I don't think so. >> think so. No, no, probably not. >> It's science. >> Yeah. So, she just thinks that's a con- conflicting belief. >> off as humans and there's no and dinosaurs
3:20 >> Yeah. Like God made the monkeys and the gorillas and humans. >> And there's dinosaurs on the Noah's Ark, too. >> My church told me that >> [laughter] >> that humans used to control the dinosaurs like that show. >> Which show? >> That one Dino uh with the You know when they have missiles and ████ on the on a dinosaur? >> Yeah, yeah, yeah. The cartoon? >> We went to a very religious I had a similar upbringing, too. Like when I was just curious about all that stuff, my parents be like Don't play with the devil stuff. I'm like, they're just What do you mean they're devil stuff? I was just curious like >> No, you can't ask questions, man. But also like parents are like the worst people to explain religion to you as well. >> Cuz they're ████ dumb. [clears throat] >> Yeah, well they're locked in. They're just locked >> Yeah, and they didn't question it so they're just They're like, "Why can't you just take it the way I took it?" >> Yeah. >> And you're just asking like one or two
4:10 questions and they get ████ >> Cuz it feels like insubordination in a way. Like, "Oh, we're losing you." You know? >> You know what my mom told me? She was like, "I was too embarrassed that >> I never even thought about questioning it and here's a child basically throwing me off." And then so she's like, "I just wanted to shut you up because it was challenging me too much." And I was like, "What? That's crazy." >> Yeah, yeah, yeah. Did you have um Did your parents put you in tutoring and everything to >> Oh, yes. >> Okay, so you had to do like >> How I know I I had so much random skills. Yeah. >> Oh, like what would they put you in? >> Like Kumon? Uh no. No, but I did do uh the um the counting thing. >> Abacus? Or abacus? >> I did abacus. I did calligraphy. Oh, one thing >> Chinese calligraphy thing? >> One uh funny thing is do you know renju
5:00 or wuziqi? >> No. >> Five in a row. It's a board game. It's the game that those old people play in all those Chinese movie with the black and white pieces. >> Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Go? >> It's not go, but it's the other one. It's called renju in Japanese. So, when I was in eighth grade I actually uh took the youth championship in that. I went to Estonia with my dad and then I won >> Estonia? >> Yeah. They had to buy Thank you. They had to buy a US flag just for me cuz nobody in US plays. >> You're the only representative of the US. That's cool. >> But but I when I tell it to people nobody understand. I actually wrote a letter to the president at the time, which is George Bush, and about this and then he actually put back a uh uh like re- um not recommendation, like just recognition. Recognition >> Oh, yeah, like a certificate. Oh, wow. >> Was your dad proud of you when you >> Oh, yeah, very Yeah, he's He starts pictures from all that today.
5:50 >> Did he tell you he was proud or he just like was like [laughter] >> That's dope. >> I mean, he went to Estonia with me. So, I would just say like the action, >> Yeah. >> you know, matters more, right? >> That's true. >> Also, in Estonia, it was just all potatoes and sausages and he would be cooking Asian food for me in the cafeteria. >> Oh, that's nice. Potatoes and sausages. >> It's the sausages for to for food. >> Wait, so he he bought a rice cooker? >> No, we just cook in the pan. >> Oh, wow. That's a cool dad. >> How did he find rice? >> [laughter] >> How did he find rice? No, I mean, like, I don't know. Some countries you just don't have the Asian rice. >> They don't They didn't have the Asian rice. We just used rice. I don't know what rice it was. >> Just some rice. >> Like Uncle Ben's or something? >> I see. >> Uncle Estonius. >> Uncle Estony.
6:40 >> What about your mom? What is your >> Potatoes [laughter] and sausages. What's my mom like? >> Yeah, she like uh is she um always all up in your business? Or is she controlling? Or she super supportive? >> Did she pressure you in any way when you were younger to do certain things with your life? >> Right. Well, she only pressured church stuff. The The rest >> Religion's her number one like >> Yeah. So, the rest she's just chill. >> Aw. Well, that's nice to know that she's praying for you, you know? >> What What did they think about your career choice? >> Um it was a struggle. >> Cuz you dropped out of college? >> Yes. >> Okay, yeah, that's a freaking fatality on your parents. They're like, "You're going to drop out to eat food?" Did that Was that what happened? To eat food? >> That is the very summarized version of it, yeah. Um but uh I mean, yeah, at first it was a struggle, but eventually, you know, you
7:31 realize that as strict as your Asian parents are, they just want you to be happy. >> Yeah. >> So, um you know, they come to accept who I am now. And every Like, I think maybe 3 years ago my dad started finally realizing my accomplishments when I would get recognized at just random restaurants we go to and he would finally realize, "Oh, she actually did something." And it's now he's very supportive. They're all very supportive. >> Yeah, that's great. Made you feel like you had to drop out of college to pursue whatever you're doing? >> Oh, no. I This wasn't part of my career, whatever. I just didn't like college. I don't like academic stuff. I'm not academically gifted. Yep. >> Really? For someone that's so good at math, it's just not interesting? >> I'm only good at math. Everything else, but I I hate sitting at lectures. I hate >> Oh. >> being forced to learn stuff I don't >> The structure of of school is like not for you, it seems. >> So, the first year of college, I straight A's. Like, I just proved to my dad I can do it. But, I didn't want to keep doing it cuz it just
8:22 Why am I doing this again? You know, it's like it's literally high school all over again and I went to UCR, which is very close to all the kids that bullied me in high school is literally in my college. So, I have to deal with all these bullies all over again. Why am I doing this? >> Where did What city did you grow up in? >> Walnut. >> Oh, in Walnut? Oh, nice. That's cool. I didn't know you're SGV. >> Yes. >> It's not Oh, I see. Yeah, Walnut's not too far from Riverside. >> No. >> Cuz I was like Well, I mean >> That was a party school. All the SGV kids went there to party. >> UC's in general, if you end up at a UC, you're going to see all your SGV friends. >> Yeah. >> Yeah. [laughter] Yeah, yeah, yeah. >> Yeah, and I was I I'm not I I grew up with a lot of social anxiety. So, it's like who I am now like socialized is very different. So, I would just be in my room all the time playing League of Legends. >> Wow. Okay. Were you Did you have a close relationship with your sister?
9:13 >> Now I do. And then when I moved out, no. And then and then again. Yeah. But, I mean, we were never like enemies. We just like we grew closer as the years went. >> What about growing up? You guys didn't like confide in each other or or close to each other? >> We don't talk. You don't You don't know how to express yourself as a Asian kid. No, yeah, we didn't really talk. >> just two cohabitants in the house? Just like >> Yeah. I mean, like Like, >> we we chill and hang out, but she doesn't really talk. I don't really talk, so we just eat food, go somewhere together. We don't really have conversations. >> That's why she wants an emotional man. Can't you see all the recipes kind of burned like cooking together? >> That's why she wants emotional man. >> [laughter] >> Cuz I was a single child, and I wish I had someone that, let's say, my parents beat my ass or something. I
10:03 couldn't wait to go gossip, you know, I'd be like, >> Did you see what ████ mom did? Mom what my you know. >> Right. >> You never wanted to like go and confide in like with someone like, look at mom or dad doing this, trying to push Christian. >> Rally support. >> Yeah. >> No, I just bottled all my feelings. >> Oh. >> Very typical Asian kid. Yeah. Until I blew up mentally. >> Oh, yeah? Did you really have a point where that happened in a way? >> Oh, yeah. Just like lots of like child depression and stuff, yeah. >> Dang. [clears throat] You were this close to becoming a school shooter. >> [laughter] >> Bro, you can't SAY THAT. >> [laughter] >> OH MY GOD. >> BUT SHE TURNED THAT energy into positivity. >> New noodle world shooter. >> Noodle world noodle noodle noodle, yeah. [snorts] >> Yeah. >> Banana Bay. >> [laughter]
10:53 >> Walnut. >> Diamond Plaza shooter. >> Yeah. >> I worked at Diamond Plaza for 6 years. >> You did? >> I worked at Ten Ren's. >> Which Ten Ren's? In Diamond Plaza? No freaking way. What years were those? >> Oh, I don't remember. >> Is it like the two early 2000s? >> 2009, maybe start. >> That's so cool. I definitely was there at some point. >> Probably. >> That's so tight. >> Can I Can I get a piece Can I ask you for some advice? >> What? >> So, let's let's say my kid enters it into this phase where he doesn't want to talk to anybody. >> Uh-huh. >> What could your dad have asked you to make you open up to him? Or like, how could he have approached you where you're like fine, this is These are all the things I could get off my chest now. >> Um Well, first of all, never ask him confront like never ask him directly. That would just spook him.
11:43 >> Yeah, that's true. >> I think he would try to do something very subtly, like pay attention to what he likes. >> Mhm. >> Mhm. Okay, let's see. For me, it was Pokémon. So, um if I remember like I would start having just random uh conversations with my dad when he took me to some random Pokémon conversation uh Pokémon convention that was in town and I didn't know about it and he knew that I like Pokémon. He would just go buy me a Pokémon guide and it made me very happy and I and I actually started talking to him cuz he didn't ask me, but then he showed me that he paid attention to my interests. >> Paying attention to your chats. >> Yeah. >> Do you think he was actually getting into Pokémon and >> No, he doesn't give a ████ about Pokémon. >> I mean, he is a software engineer. >> No, but he didn't care about Pokémon, you know. But, he knew I liked it. >> That's a nice gesture. >> Yeah, it is. Yeah. >> Attention, Bart. I'm uninstall the chat logger. >> that guide.
12:33 >> [laughter] >> Oh, the original guide he gave you? >> Yeah. >> Oh, that must mean something, huh? >> Well, yeah, because like I used that guide to like cuz you know, you just play the Pokémon game, you don't know what to do, you get stuck and there was no internet as good now back then. So, you're trying to figure out how do I get past this level or whatever. I forgot what the specific was, but I was be reading the guide to get past the level. >> Those are kind of valuable now, too. The actual paperback guides. That's so cool you still have it. >> Thank you for the advice. >> You're welcome. I hope it helps. >> You should get more advice from people like Reina instead of guys like us. >> [laughter] >> Yeah, cuz I'll just tell you to tell Taika don't look at dick pics. >> I I think with kids or like when you want to confront somebody, it doesn't have to be kids. It's it's very hard to like be really confront cuz maybe they get um taken back by how aggressive it is
13:23 and using like subliminal messaging is more effective. >> Mhm. >> I got to learn that. >> Yeah, because that's what the world does to you, you know, like like let's say if very clear example is when you have a sale, but it's not a sale, but you make like psychologically make people buy it. It feels better, you know. But then like if you see the sale sign, you would be more obliged to buy it rather than somebody standing in front of it saying, "Hey, come buy this." >> Right, exactly. >> It's on sale. >> Yeah. >> You know. >> [snorts]
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