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The Story Behind Japan's Wacky Penis Festival, Beginning in 1969

#penis#steeldick#marlonbrando#phallus#festival
the transcript auto-captions · entered into evidence

0:00 foreign of Japan Every Spring thousands of tourists from Japan and overseas descend upon a shrine in Tokyo's neighboring prefecture of Kanagawa to celebrate the penis oh yeah the penis Festival thingy it's the spring thing don't body shrimp that's dope the symbol of fertility is at the center of the kanamara Matsuri or Festival of the steel phallus which ranks as one of Japan's bizarre festivals and the story behind it is basically this Legend okay a demon once sought revenge on a woman who rejected him by taking up residence inside her vagina and biting down on her husband's penis so she was unable to

0:50 procreate in order to solve the problem the woman paid a blacksmith to create a steel phallus to break the Demon's teeth which he did ultimately restoring her fertility wow I didn't know that that's pretty they've been I'm telling you hentai is a age-old tradition in Japan it's not a new thing it's a very convoluted fairy tale it's a good Legend it should be shared in public school systems because usually like Western like it's like night defeats Dragon you know but then this one it's like the demon to her ████ defeat that David have to get a steel dick and smash it's like I made a story it's like when YouTube came out and all these tubers like making stuff and then everyone's like whoa this is so good hi I'm here I'm your audience member and like wow this is so refreshing and original and different but it's like it just sucks

1:41 but there's nothing else to compare it to this is not good storytelling yeah yeah I want to see like the animated version of this that that's a children's educational material where it's like you know what I mean the Demon's sitting there inside the shadowy vagina that like you can see through a slit of like daylight and then when a normal penis the husband penis comes in and just bites it and just stops the sperm that's one thing it's very very very dark and like aha the Demon's winning then this giant steel black dick comes in place it's teeth and it tries to bite and just shatters it's like an iron dick yeah dude though America has Iron Man Japan has iron dick quite a hand tie up and then the girl meanwhile is like wow this feels great thank you for the steel dick in my vagina so a replica of the phallus and the spirit of the blacksmith are preserved at The Shrine called kanayama here's an image of it this is the

2:32 legendary replica of the steel black smoothie ████ and this this is celebrated is that like is that like four NYX is that like pretty old like centuries old well it's a replica of it so I mean this is like just the thing that during the festival they like bring around it's a it's a shrine replica oh it's not life-size because that can't fit into women yeah yeah yeah we don't like to say that yeah whoa dude we don't know what tricks are into however it's like a flagpole dude there is a penis now that is uh not as welcome at this Festival so so people you know like because it's a giant because of the giant Festival you know there's things like penis lollipops that people sell you know they kind of commercialize a lot of the penis and phallus stuff uh and more Bachelor

3:22 bachelorette party stuff basically but then Japanese girls have their bachelor parties there they should maybe there's one penis that has been created or erected I should say uh and it's created so well that it's oftentimes confused with the legendary symbol so now the festival and like the officiants are kind of like hey we need to disassociate from this other penis that some like fan of the thing oh because it's too good yeah so people are like is that the penis that's not the penis this is the piano it's a pink one penis yeah so that's the back side of it though oh that's like the well this one looks more like the husband's penis anything but that's yeah that's exactly yeah it's not it's not the blacksmith it's a different name and the legend of the steel penis is the one that people need to walk away with In Worship in a sense okay so it's getting upstaged basically kind of yeah

4:13 you can't have like Jesus and then right next to them you have right you have like it's like which one goes no no I know he's more handsome but we need to do the real Jesus oh yeah Jesus it's like a Chad Jesus this demon is a he's quite the incel isn't he he's he got rejected and then now he's like well you know what if I can't hear your ████ nobody can I'll bite all the dicks that come inside here yeah that's kind of messed up yeah it's so stupid swallowing to come so that she can't procreate by having to go into her room I know but isn't this deal I'll drink all the ████ so you can can't get a baby yeah the Demon's kind of gay yeah and then the husband's like oh this demon keeps sucking on my dick and he's all like oh I'm never gonna ████ ████ anymore yeah do they have like kids at these festivals too oh yeah it's a family I mean they don't censor dicks

5:05 right like that like that you know like but are they ever like eating like are they ever eating like dick-shaped Foods probably yeah yeah there's dick ████ like there's lollipops on cartoons with kids flashing their dicks like so it's like mermaids yeah Little Mermaid Japanese version the coral bro are there movies or like um yeah they're movies based on that storyline but just no it's it's niche it's like it's like saying like Mardi Gras or some ████ like it's it's it exists but like not everyone goes and knows that's a little weird see that though come on or funny what's what's crazy about that what's crazy about that for you girl [Laughter]

5:55 yeah like I know that Festival happens and people go as a guy like it's funny like it's like a gag right like uh yeah but then I think every so like the whole dick and fart joke thing like I think everyone laughs at Dicks it's just funny funny it's just yeah guys girls everybody laughs at Dicks and then like yeah there's this cartoon we grew up on where um I think the US version they edit it out but like you know how kids always ████ run around like flash people yeah yeah and it's a normal like childhood thing like there's constructed jokes in there where do he would flash people and ████ set up punch basically hey look at me oh one two yeah yeah but you're like three years old so and you think it's so funny yeah there's even like old Stephen child movies where you'll just have like a kid with his dick out and he just like has like a

6:46 little straw he's like poking the kids out yeah one of my favorite like uh Hong Kong films are these two kid monks they leave the temple one's actually really good at martial arts and one's more like for like um comedic relief and he's like a funny kid likes to eat like a short fat kid that has to eat everything and there's one scene where they paint an elephant on his dick and his dick is the elephant trunk and for like maybe like half the movie you see his penis like a kid's penis and just like a movie that they played in a theater the movie yeah bro you ever watched Superman one with Marlon Brando dude that movie when they find Clark Kent he's naked as a ████ days born and guess what he stands up picking up a ████ truck yeah and his Dick's out really it's actually out he's like two and a half years old and his Dick's out 100 percent oh I think I remember yeah holy ████ but

7:37 it's a Kryptonian dick so you're like whoa he's kind of hung it's kind of crazy it's Marlon Brando well Marlon Brando no is it's a baby it's jorel but Clark Kent is the councilman is holding them yeah yeah I can't remember that two and a half this is another uh this is another Infamous costume that is being mistaken for the mascot so another that guy looks like a crustacean he has a penis arm he looks like a Power Rangers villain gingerbread cookie that guy's like ████ doing this ████ against the Power Rangers yeah come on Rangers [Laughter] like oh oh it's like dude Sparks go flying yeah oh so much they fall on the ground they're crazy how it goes I think that Festival is pretty cool we referenced a lot of different Cinema history that had kids dicks in them

8:28 is there is there thick shame in other Asian countries because I remember going to Thailand and I remember like seeing there was this wood carver and I was looking at his ████ booth and he had a whole section of ████ dicks that were that had a face in it and they were smiling and happy and then you know like the Buddha that's like that it was like that but it was a dick or like and I was like this is ████ hilarious like they have a huge that's like in Greece too they have like those just wooden dicks and it's just a huge thing to just sell like the actual penises yeah there's like a dick flute dick keychain Dick Tracy I don't know you know they have it in Bali too oh it's like big wood carving things yes I honestly I would just assume that a lot of it is just Taboo in America maybe it's because it's like you do something like that then it's like oh you're gonna get sued for like 80 billion dollars or some ████

9:19 no I I think America culture is Puritan so it's like it's very it's it's like Europe secular now Puritan but then America is very Puritan and like just really shuns sex stuff so Americans like to get mad at stuff too well that's how they get power trips like they just like put other things down it's weird this is not Philippines loves dicks like you've seen Barrel man father Karen's ████ about this ████ have the biggest blackest dildos at home get the ████ out of here oh probably they wish they had the steel dick well because enjoy the demon in her ████ because that's that's how they see it they don't they don't see it as like it's it's bad to do it's bad to admit you do yes it's it's more about tapping it in the bedroom yeah it's like that's for only your husband that's personal business yeah that's why it's fun hanging out with Nikki's parents because

10:09 they're like like my parents were still not that way but Nikki's parents are so open sexually stuff they're like yeah we ████ and like yeah it's awesome I talk about pounding their daughter in front of them and like I've even tried it with her dad like just trolling them like hiding height and oh wow that's awesome are you doing the stepping on the head thing the shoes on the background are you taking your shoes off putting it on your hands ████ chilling because the reason why I ask is because I would totally imagine you do that and it would still fly because you're Steve Green I'm gonna try that this Christmas it's been a newer bit but I'm gonna see him in next month and so I'll guess yeah try it out I'll tell you guys yeah if he knows the reference you know what kind of porn he's watching dude honestly you know what I might actually do okay I'm gonna get I'm gonna get Nikki I'm gonna I'm gonna get like um like the

10:59 the fake tattoo ████ and have somebody do a footprint on the back of Nikki's neck and just like have her walk around for the weekend and see if her parents ask about it and I'll be like and then I'll I'll be like oh ████ sorry that's from my ████ shoe I don't know like with a napkin what the like what though squirm at all when you ████ with her dad no not at all this one I ████ with Jill's mom I mean hey Ma did you hear me in jail last night she was crazy huh we didn't do anything we didn't do anything like she started squirming all over like I don't know why but I think she has that it's just kind of awkward between her and my mom remember the headboard was ████ slamming against the wall all night no Nikki and her dad had an adversarial relationship when she was growing up and so now it's like sort of a vuncular like

11:50 fun like oh that's cool yeah yeah this one foreign

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