0:00 he acts like a gay guy to get close to this girl on the on the cruise ship well I've done that before but I've never watched that movie okay well [Music] so the director of the Jurassic World movies like all three of them James Cameron not Colin trevorrow oh travaro he thinks that the movies should have probably stopped after the original Steven Spielberg film he shouldn't have made any films you know why because these are the same I mean that's a the First new one from the Chris Pratt version I liked it but I was like oh these are the same beats as the first dressing you liked it you liked this most recent one I like you know what I was watching on peacock yeah so I was like for a free movie this is fine oh it's free I mean Dominion the
0:50 third one yeah yeah but the first but the first Jurassic Park I saw in theaters and I was like look I think you go you go see those movies in theater just because you look at all the cool dinosaurs and that's it that's all but it's the same time for real I feel like yeah the ████ Raptor scene in the kitchen I was like dude I've seen this before I saw the first one and I liked it because I had a head injury thank you exactly that's that's how I operate daily anyway so what a review yeah it was a review um what did you like about the first one all of it I ████ thought that movie was garbage you didn't like how he was talking to the Raptors and he's like come here girl you know come here you know what's funny about that movie I saw that movie you guys know Taryn Terence Southern yeah yeah I saw the movie with Taryn is me and Nikki and Taryn and like we saw that movie and we're all we all walked out of that ████ movie with those duels that's why you didn't give it a chance dude oh is that what it is
1:41 yeah so you didn't even see the T-rex fight at the end I walked out two minutes before the end oh remind me what what it was uh what was the critic response to this one it was probably terrible it's a cash grab you watch something like oh these are just scams to be fair please I um I didn't walk in expecting another Spielberg Innovative thing that's true I was just like I like dinosaurs and I like good ████ Graphics I like the CGI in it so I think the first one gave me enough of that and it checked those two boxes enough I was in entertain even though it's a bad movie yeah I was able to be entertained okay the second and third movie the second movie was terrible third movie I couldn't finish even though it was free on HBO yeah and I like dinosaurs is that bad is that odd I didn't finish I didn't finish Dominion either I saw the first like 20 minutes and I was like oh that's cool I don't think you could follow Steven Spielberg though yeah you can't
2:31 it's just they just leave it to rest just leave it yeah and that ████ was like Innovative during that time plus they were using like animatronics and ████ that's always gonna be way sicker than ████ CGI do they got John Williams on the soundtrack they didn't they just kept using this yeah they were using similar tones it's not magic that Steven Spielberg John Williams team you can't beat that that's the only thing that let the first thing be tight actually yeah is when you see the whole world and the music they like they like stumble across across the old Jurassic Park and then once they see like the banner and stuff like that the little ████ tune the Jeep yeah so so that was cool and I think that's why it was likable but in the most recent one when they bring in the old cast and stuff it's so cheesy Nostalgia right Nostalgia is how they they get you now they get you with that stall do they get you hard they get you nice and hard and then you're ready to ████ and then you find out that nobody's coming to ████ you or
3:21 blow you or anything like it's all like oh that's a movie review it's just a scam it's all scam they got me all the way full hard and then like there's nothing gonna cool with the Fast and Furious franchise oh don't talk ████ on that though you better be careful look at how I'm dressed take the franchise I hated the last the last the last one was terrible oh is that the one where the rock breaks out of his ████ his cast yeah the rock wasn't in the last one go to space no yeah oh I didn't see it that's the one with the uh respectfully I only liked I didn't like any of that movie until they went to space now I'm sorry because you like spaces yeah I saw that and I was like all right I like seeing ludicrous creatine but it's like can you make it like look I get it like it's you're you're making a big scene out of it but it's like is there a way we can make this a little less corny you know what I mean I think they played into the corny well and then
4:12 it went way too crazy during like Hops and Shop post era yeah I was a child was my favorite Papa John's the greatest movie ever made okay Robin shot should be a Criterion when they when they go back to the motherland with all the ████ Tongans and the Samoans did Russia was crazy you know that's hot jobs huh you didn't like Creed I did like Creed I didn't like Creed either I couldn't get I do got created you do like Creed I thought Creeds suck dick whoa on Ice I thought it was bad me too I couldn't get through it the the movie opens Creed is already really good at fighting oh cool where's should be really hard like fighting these underground circuits no one knows who he is yeah I like Southpaw Southpaw was good that was a good boxing movie I'm only bringing Creed up because I feel like it was that similar type of feeling which I feel like so many franchises are
5:03 redoing right same thing you're bringing like the Our Generation older generation cast into the story and then making it work with the newer generation you know what I'm saying that's what reboots are for right yeah but like some of them aren't done well like the Karate Kid so patronizing it just sounds that way I didn't mean that like that you just handed Anthony he's Quest Crew I'm used to it that way I didn't mean it that way to you I just I just bet that's why reboots kind of get a pass because it's it's just to cash in from the next cash crap yeah because they won't buy it no it's my Karate Kid ████ analogy what about Karate Kid I didn't see that are you talking about the second one with the mean Asian guy yeah with Jaden and Jackie's hands I didn't see it no but that's like a reboot as well but that's not like what about when Sylvester Stallone showed up in Creed and you're using the same people that like we fell in love with and you're
5:53 trying to make that work in the new story right but that's what Jurassic Park does with this latest one but it was terrible yeah but Goldblum did was he like hesitant and stuff because that's what I like yeah he's like oh um yeah I don't know thank you life finds a way yeah okay good that was really good I have a gold Bloom at Independence Day though follow you but hey Goblin Independence the best but Jeff Goldblum in the Billy Studio though a Goldblum in Death Wish one you haven't seen it he's he plays a he plays a oh boy I remember that now holy ████ I remember that now I was like when is the first movie released he's just a villain he's just a throwaway bad guy I gotta practice that with a Jughead Crown I remember that
6:44 like remade like some for modern era Death Wish was Bruce Willis I'm kidding there's probably not a good example you mean like of one like one that actually did well that that pleased well it depends how far back you're looking because Nutty Professor is good and how much and how much they can read Assault on Precinct 13 with Ethan Hawke I thought was ████ sick but a lot of people hate that movie I enjoyed that movie deep cut how did you guys feel about Jumanji it was cool it was all right it's cool to watch an airplane because they they also brought back an old actor in that one too right the kid or whatever I don't even remember him it was all right it's cool to watch when I'm trapped somewhere and I can't go yeah and I have nothing else because there are certain movies that like work pretty well in certain situations like one when you're on an airplane some movies are so forgiving yeah like I just watch some brainless content yeah and you're like this is
7:35 cool you know but when I watch this to go see the theater that's that's what I thought about boat trip I think I saw in a really weird state of mind and I liked it everybody ████ ████ um with Walter Matthau right well no boat trip is the one with Cuba Gooding Jr oh my bad do you remember that no no you didn't see that one where he's like he acts like a gay guy to get close to this girl on the on the cruise ship I've done that before but I've never watched that movie okay well it's apparently objectively bad and I I thought it was good I was like out to sea oh okay this is a Walter Matthau movie with Jack Lemmon and Walter mattha they were ████ hilarious together what are movies that are so bad that they're good I mean I guess the room would be the champion of all have you guys ever the room Ghost Rider bro super fast oh yeah
8:25 I've seen it it's the Fast and Furious parody ████ film it's so bad it's pretty bad that it's good it's pretty ████ terrible it's like this I think here's a scene from it there's like a boot like Vin Diesel I think and then he's racing uh someone else because they're trying to re redo the first fast and furious scene and I think like in the middle of like shifting gears because he's going faster and faster when someone else hits NOS randomly there's like shaving cream on his head and he's like she's like shaving his head and he's like goes to the third gear like that's the type of movie why do they do that yeah but it's so bad it's good for you it's one of those that's so bad it's so funny the more you watch it the better it gets and the more you go hey you gotta see this then the just it becomes like this spectacle do you think that these guys just watch airplane with cross eyes yeah and they're like where I know oh
9:16 that's good this is good yeah because we have some shaving cream on his head yeah most most dance movies are so bad they're good most dance moves like what there's one some of them try to be good that they're so bad yeah there's one that's the champion of all it's called it's called dancing it's on that's a great title not so many dance words that one sound like that one just just the ADR alone is so bad that like it sounds like everything's a narration in people's minds because the way they recorded it's like without any atmosphere so everyone sounds like they're thinking their dialogue when you're watching this movie at one minute Mark where you're like it's on it oh ████ there was a movie on Showtime when I was like a ████ kid I was probably like 12 or 11. it was called like the kickboxing academy and it was about it was kind of like the same premise of best of the best but with kids and then at the very end there's always a ████
10:07 karate tournament Winner Takes all or whatever right the the bad guys they lose and the bad Sensei at this like giant tournament with a gang of people he pulls out like a submachine gun with like bandoliers and he starts shooting in the sky and he's holding everyone hostage it's so sad and this little boy comes up and ████ punches him in the dick and it's like he saves the day and I was like and I used to watch this movie every single ████ time and I knew I was I was like 12 or 11. I knew this movie was dog ████ but I just couldn't stop watching it because I was like this is great like I don't know what it is but I just love this movie but dude that's great so look up the kickboxing academy I think that's what it's called that's how it felt about Miami Connection you ever seen that see all these movies nobody has ever seen this one's an 80s movie about a it's a rock band a group of teenagers that are also
10:58 all black belts and they have to defeat ninjas I already love it yeah this is good that's way better I'm about to jump into all their whole treatment all their songs all their rock songs talk ████ on ninjas you see all these movies get made right and then we have what like ████ four scripts that we've been pitched around pitched around town yeah someone paid to have Vin Diesel shave his head in a ████ race car our scene and we can't even get ████ like 200 000 to shoot a ████ movie you gotta Finance it yourself so great damn that's right Stallone dude you know what Stallone went through for Rocky right yeah like he basically it was like he sold this dog too right sold his dog he's like oh I'm gonna saw my dog and then he's just using that to pay bills and ████ and
11:48 then he finally like sells Rocky and they're like we don't want you to star in it and he's like okay well then I don't want to sell you Rocky and then he had to negotiate with those guys but he only got to sell Rocky because he went in for an audition somewhere and he just started cold talking to these guys after he was like I'm not right for the part but like you guys should check out my movie Rocky and they actually listen they actually read it and like it's it's ████ crazy wow that's tight it's crazy amazing and then he actually got to self-produce it he he started in it he didn't even make like I don't think he made like 20 grand off of it like the initial run and then but in the points later on he buys his dog back and then gets sick points later on hey bought his dog back at a ████ loss did he really yeah the guy sold it back to him for more that's wild I've Got The Leverage so I looked up the movie The kickboxing
12:38 academy wow so I found it there's this is because I wanted to look this up before I told you guys about it in the in the movie there's a a female love interest and a male love interest right in real life they're brother and sister and they share a kiss on screen oh Mark in the movie and they play each other's love interest so that's why you should watch this movie you're a weirdo dude it's with Kyler lay she's ████ sick she kissed her brother in the movie remember blank check blank check dude that kid kisses the bank lady he's like ████ 12 years old he's got to be goddamn 11 and a half maybe he's 13 in September though maybe but dude the bank lady is dead look up the ████ fun fact in that movie do you guys remember the chick from Dumb and Dumber like oh you remember this movie Manny from Scarface is in this movie see which movie dude there's a lot of
13:28 conversation going on sorry his kickboxing academy movie you guys remember the the uh the chick from Dumb and Dumber like the woman Swanson with yeah who's with the henchman guy and she's like what the ████ yeah yeah she's the bank lady in blank check oh no he kisses an 11 year old kid in this movie on the lips on the lip remember that ████ so this is just this is just industry that's what kids wanted to see technically and she tells him she's like let me know when you're older after they kiss I'm not kidding what the ████ that's why I think and then she goes I'm Colonel John McBee everyone goes baby [Music]
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