0:05 Welcome back to Careful Boys. Today we're talking about is getting it in by the third date a real thing >> anymore? >> What is that? What? >> So, there's this there's this thing when we were growing up >> where if you it's like it's called third date sex. >> Oh, >> right. So, like >> Oh, >> if you don't have sex by the third date, >> get the ████ out of there. >> Get the out of there. Exactly. And it it seems to matter a ton what kind of dates we're talking about. Like if you just take a girl to a restaurant three times, that's not the same. >> To me, that's a date. >> No, I don't know if it's the same. I think you got to like escalate to I think you have to escalate how you're meeting. You know, >> you're going to chili three times. >> You just got to do >> I sure did that. >> And if it's like picnic at the park, but you're and you're also laying down and cuddling and then like that like where the physical touch gets closer and closer where you're not over a table
0:56 like hi, nice to meet you. Threeing Long John Silvers in a row. [laughter] >> Yeah. >> Fish and chips. ████ I BOUGHT YOU FISH AND CHIPS. YOU'RE NOT SUCKING MY DICK. >> CUZ YOU'RE supposed to build rapport, not repeat rapport. That'd be kind of like >> That's funny. I took you to three places where Danny's [laughter] Applebee's and ████ Red Lobster. Red Lobster was a grand finale, dude. Do you and I >> I remember dating uh when I was in LA dating it was so fun because I would just take chicks to my favorite restaurant every single time like >> to Elmpadre Mexican restaurant. >> It's a good time no matter what. >> Yeah. So So it's like no matter what I I'm definitely paying for the meal. So I'm like I might as well have the best meal ever. >> The looks The looks from your server. >> Number 18. >> What's that? >> Number 18's a It's a Oh, I don't remember. I'm a fake. I'm a fraud. It's It's a cheese enchilada and a and a beef tamalei. >> Oh, nice. and uh rice and beans maybe.
1:47 But the but the the thing about it was I would take them there three times in a row even. [laughter] >> Oh ████ >> By the third time. Are you ordering something a little lighter? Cuz you know you know something's I'll take that last tamalei to go. Please. [laughter] >> Is that the place you went to because that burger place was closed? >> That's the place. Yeah. Me and Joe went there once recently. It was like a year ago or something. >> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, that's in like Lincoln Heights or whatever. >> There's two of them. There's one on West Sunset, too. But but the the weakest thing that I did was take her to there three times. >> Which one did you like better though? >> What do you mean? >> Oh, whistles. >> Yeah. By Toy >> where I always went to. Yeah. >> Did you take Nikki there three times in a row? >> I took Nikki there every single year for my birthday for sure. And then I basically had to do it for my birthday cuz Nikki doesn't like Mexican food. >> Um >> yeah, even though the Philip I think it's cuz the Philippines got absolutely ravaged by the Spaniards. So I think she
2:37 takes it really personally. [laughter] When I first uh when I first started having sex, >> um I >> like and then I was dating. I I actually didn't like it if it was going to happen too fast. >> What does that mean? This guy wants to work for it. Dude, you talking about >> I remember there's [laughter] this girl that I saw. >> I got a PR this week. >> There's this girl that we we first start. >> He's such a cow. It's Boy Scout, dude. >> Yeah. There's this one that happened like um what is it? We we were talking. She came over and then I stuck my whole hand in her vagina and I was like there's no whole hand. >> That's gynecological. >> You went like this put her fingers but I was just like going elbow deep. >> I was like damn we this is our first time hanging out. This is when I was a
3:28 junior. This is our first time hanging out, >> right? >> And in two hours I'm like my fingers are inside of your vagina. It just made me like crazy turned off. >> I'm like I'm like Bart. >> But then I have obviously when she leaves I have a ████ boner and then I'm like man I should have just ████ came. >> But then also I just >> it it I don't know. It was like this mixed feelings. It was weird. >> Can I ask what what can I ask what she was doing while your entire hand was in her vagina? She [snorts] just probably grabbing on my dick scrolling. >> Grabbing on my dick and sucking on my neck or something. [laughter] >> Yeah, Ty just doing his move. >> I seen you guys, [laughter] dude. >> No, but yeah, I just felt like I was like, "What the f███?" Yeah, I didn't
4:19 feel like I didn't earn it. Yeah, I feel like I didn't earn it. I don't know what it is. I >> also You kind of think like given this to me this early. You don't even know me, bro. I can't even articulate it. >> But it's it'll always be true. It's the thing where you you're waiting to see where to file her >> and now you have to file her under Oh, it's too easy. >> ████ zone. >> Yeah, it's a ████ zone file. But then like if she But you know the girl that was like, "No, not yet." Oh, okay. Wifey material possibly. >> Yeah, such a double standard. But it's true. You know, >> that's how we look at the world. Scum either way. But you know >> Yeah. You guys never viewed it like that and me and it was >> No, I viewed it like that too. >> I definitely >> I purpos I purposely wanted to like push it further if we could. >> Yeah. >> Yeah, I definitely felt like that. >> Yeah. >> Like if Well, I as far as what you're saying like categorizing them in my head. It's look girls, sorry. It's just
5:11 how our brains work. >> It's It's the truth. >> It's so weird. >> If a girl was like very sexually forward with me, I'd be like [snorts] I don't even know you. I don't even know who your mother is. Like I would think like that for real. >> And it didn't mean that like oh because she's so sexually forward. It didn't mean that I'm going to cower and go ew. I'll probably just switch the scumbag ver to the scumbag guy that I am. >> Oh yeah. It's like a different part of you. >> Get this guy and I'm never going to take you to my family's house. Like you'll just get this ████ piece of ████ which I also am. >> Yeah. Omron. Shout out Omron. >> Yeah. >> What do you mean you didn't cower? [laughter] >> Running away is not an appropriate option. >> No. But then but then the thing that Bart ran into is that like it's it's more of like if you were going into something and all along the way you saw different signs, you read them and you defined her as, "Oh, she's a good girl." And then it comes out too easy, then
6:01 you're like, "Oh ████ my recon was incorrect." >> Yeah. Yeah. >> And then it just kind of throws you for a loop. So yeah, it's so ████ dumb >> cuz your expectations just ruin it. >> Yeah. Yeah. It's dumb, but it's true. that went away for me the older I got like in my mid to late 20s on because I remember like really liking someone and then like they were [snorts] more like like they're like not so like sexual and stuff and then we we actually did it and then I was like damn we are not physically compatible at all and then like I felt really bad and I felt really shallow cuz I was like man I don't know like I can't it's like not that good being intimate with them, but I like them as a person. And I started losing feelings. And I was like, man, from now on, I want Scandinavian rules where we just ████ and get it out of the way and
6:52 see if we're like >> good there and how comfortable we are with each other and then I'll figure out if I want to be with them. >> What was the physical incompatibility compatibility part? >> I would say like what >> she was smacking you in the face. [laughter] >> That story is crazy. >> What enjoys them? what they enjoy what like it's it's more like you just know like there's certain things where you guys don't see eye to eye or like it's just not working like it feels weird she's jerky or she moves >> rhythm I was going to say like and it's [laughter] just like >> I'm not having a good time ████ like this is like yeah it's a ████ but like >> like there's no connection there or like I don't know it's just a feeling of like dude it's weird ████ this person or like there's there's also libido like differences. Like she might be too horny
7:44 or like not horny enough and then like want it as much. Dude, I've been with too horny. I'm just like holding on to the toilet. I'm not ready. And then she's trying to pull me and ████ like no we're ████ AND I'M LIKE NO [screaming] STOP. You know, and then like his voice defaults to that whenever [laughter] he doesn't want to have I came two times. You could come again. I'll make you. And I'm like >> yeah that is true there. So there's like that compatibility of like [laughter] >> Joe's had a great life. >> Sexual sexual energy matching. >> Yeah. And I I'm like I want to know if like that's going to be solid. And I think if you like someone it would grow. But there's been times where I like someone and then I sleep with them and then I I have that and I waited and then I just feel so shallow that I'm like, "Oh, but I just can't get over the
8:34 fact." Or like small things like, "Oh, I don't give a head." I'm like, "What? I found out that like six months ████ later. You experienced that, too. >> Yeah, bro. >> It's such a It's a shallow deal breaker. >> For that reason, I'm out, [laughter] >> right? And it's like, I really like you. And there's so many great things. You're like so good. And your marriage material, but you don't suck dick and I feel so shallow. >> I don't think that's shallow, though, cuz I think it triggers something deeper. >> Sucking dick. >> Yeah, cuz I think it's like maybe like you don't fully accept me. >> Yeah. >> To act of service. >> You think I'm I wish I had that line. >> Yeah, me too. That's a better line than you're such a ████ cuz you don't suck dick. >> Cuz I think >> you don't fully accept >> cuz I think all surface things trigger deep things, you know, cuz that's why you have such a like guttural feeling towards it. >> That's true. >> I just I also really enjoy ████ and I didn't even know that that was a thing that we >> Yeah, dude. Who doesn't?
9:24 >> Yeah, like ████ >> We We like that. >> ████ [laughter] guys. >> We're ████ guys. >> Let's ████ do it. ████ We're [laughter] >> Oh, NO. NO. I DON'T SUCK, DICK. I don't like ████ I like getting them cuz I'm a man. >> Do you know something really sad is there was a girl I dated that only sucked dick >> that? Oh, really? >> No sex. >> She couldn't she couldn't do penetration. >> Is it because religion or like >> No. So like she dropped she kind of dropped it on me like all at once but like we were dating everything was great. I thought she like was she was awesome all across the board. Then the first time we got intimate she was like hey like I just I wanted to like let you know like I can't do penetration. She has the tie ████ syndrome. >> No, >> she's a Barbie doll. >> No, no, no. Like you know what I'm talking about. >> Guessing. Keep guessing. >> Not that. No. She said that she has trauma from like something happened. >> That's even worse.
10:14 >> Something had happened to her in the past that and now she she can't like have sex without thinking about it. So >> ████ >> She was just like, you know, like I hope you're not disappointed. Like the she's like, but um I'll suck your dick. Hella good. And I was like, okay, >> that's great. >> But then like I but then I couldn't stop thinking about that. Yeah. >> So, when she said that, I was like, I'm not even comfortable getting head because >> she's not going to think you're think about her trauma. >> Yeah. Because like I don't even want to do anything now cuz I feel really like uncomfortable about like about >> cuz I'm a ████ guy. [laughter] >> You're like, >> I win. >> No, but yeah, it didn't work out because I I couldn't like get in the zone because I was always trying to be overly considerate of that. >> Damn. >> You know what I mean? That's tough. >> Just say you couldn't get hard. >> I could get hard. I just there was nowhere really to go after that. I was just like, "Oh, then I feel I just felt
11:04 guilty." I was like, "Oh, like I know like you're technically supposed to I don't know, figure out some way to navigate, but I I still thought it was too early to be that guy also in our in our relationship." So, I was like, damn, I'm not really okay with this. >> And only getting ████ That's like going to McDonald's and you just get fries. You still want a Coke and a burger. You're not getting the whole meal. >> You need the protein. >> I need the whole thing. >> Yeah. I mean, the fries are really good. >> Telling you, it's never enough, brother. >> There's something about it where you're like, there's something missing. >> But you never had a nugget in your ass. [laughter] >> You got to try that, dude. >> Try a little McFlurry up there. >> Ooh, I would like that. [laughter] >> Yeah. As soon as this chick told me she's not, you know, she kept making excuses why she's not sucking dick and I was like, >> what were the excuses? Political.
11:54 >> No, no. Yeah. Yeah. Mostly Antifa stuff. [laughter] >> She's like, I just watched Loose Change the other day. Yeah, I'm a little rock to my core. I don't think I can suck on your >> I don't think I could be with a chick that doesn't suck dick either. >> My guy. >> Are you a ████ guy? >> I didn't know that about you. >> I might. >> You're a brother. >> Can I join? >> Hello, brother. [clears throat] >> Hello, brother. >> Well, cuz to me cuz to me it's that's part of the acceptance thing. >> Yeah. >> Like I don't even like my ass licked. >> But if I asked them to lick my ass and they said no, that's the same thing as no ████ >> What the hell? >> Yeah. Because I think to me it's >> I dude I understand you >> because how I see it is full acceptance. I should be able to I'm gonna wear a cheerleader's outfit and I'm gonna ████ have tassels on my nipples >> and if you say no even I'll never do that. You're out. >> Whoa. >> That's how I am. I'm like it's got to be full. We're shark tanking all these things >> in the bedroom. I'm a emperor. And if
12:46 you can't recognize that you're out. >> Yeah. Yeah. >> He didn't say king though. I notic he said emperor. >> The idea that we all tell this girl that she doesn't suck dick. So, for that reason, I'm out. And then Kevin Olar is like, "Well, well, well. [laughter] Now it's time to make a royalty deal. >> You're down to one shark left." >> You were just on here for the publicity, weren't you? Yeah.
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