0:00 I guarantee if you called an Indian restaurant they would never call the cop ever call the cop or do anything they going have your back it'd be like what what is going on do you deserve it what did you do what did you do what did you [Music] do you know those like things I guess like calling the police kind of has these features but like stuff where you need to ask for help but you can't explicitly say it so you have to say it in code oh isn't there like a certain like hand signal like yeah there's like a one where your fingers go over your thumb what is this SOS it's like uh my husband's beating me or something oh ████ I me I didn't mean to say it sound insensitive but it's like something like that when do this right yeah or something when they like doing this I
0:50 guess one of them is you call the cops and you order a pizza oh have you heard that one I've seen people do that yeah you want to hear what it sounds like yeah holy ████ I just play a regular pizza order this is Bart's Pizza I would like to order a pizza at 2846 you called 911 to order a pizza uh yeah doesn't get the code let's see let's see this is the wrong number to call for a pizza no no no no no no no no no you're not I'm getting you now he's like I got it okay what do you want on your pizza that's pretty tight that full ████ forgot where he was that he like forgot where he he's like May are you ████ stupid this is 911 this is about to be the worst pizza ever he's like you want an emergency pizza so
1:42 yeah that in that example in that example they actually did respond to the house and then they were able to save her she was getting beat up yeah she like a crazy ass husband or something but like what other ways do you think we can ask for help in code because now that everyone knows this you can't use it cuz your dude's going to be like what you going to do order a pizza that's what you do you flood the toilet and then you call the plumber I saw some someone put in they ordered like a Domino's Pizza and like in the special request they literally put like call 9911 and they did it whoa some not everybody reads those all what if you're getting beat up by a husband right okay and then he gets hungry from beating your ass cuz he's been ████ working his fist all day and he goes make me some food ████ and and you're like but like there's no food in the
2:33 fridge even though there is right and then you're like I'll call for pizza and he goes n you Uber Eats it and you're like oh ████ then what do you do do you type Uber Eats tell tell you tell the driver that we did a story like that where somebody told the Uber driver like I'm getting murdered or something and then they fixed it they came to the rescue they figured what if you're already on the phone with the cops and they don't do the pizza thing no more what I guarantee if you called an Indian restaurant they would never ever call the cop ever call the cop or do anything they w't have your back it'd be like what what is going on do you deserve it what did you do what did you do what did you do they'd be like are you uh first of all they'd be like are you under 18 is your is it your parents who are beating you why did you not get a good
3:23 grade they ask you why before they all up in your business and ████ yeah yeah because like it's it's almost seems like a double standard whenever there's a new thing like the code thing or the this thing like the more you tell everybody the more you can't do it right cuz it's supposed to be secret does it always happen P of stuff cuz maybe the perpetrators aren't watching all this cool news they're watching children also it has to be within context of the situation right so maybe like you guys already ate why would you be calling a pizza place right okay yeah let's say you can't what so what do you uh what's another way you could do it through a video game catch what a video game you know how there's like certain chat rooms in video games oh yeah you can do that now you can go play your video game oh man that's a deep one dude Call of Duty no one's going to call that but here's the thing how often are
4:13 I'm assuming most of the time it's it's a woman going through this unfortunate event like the majority of people who do play video games have a c certain friend group that plays so that would know your character so when you were to say what if the dude's right there though and you got to like what do you say oh right you you got to be like uh taking sustaining heavy damage here at the at bombsite a yeah you start need say your address push guys push let's go cuz that's why the Pizza Works cuz they could be right there and you're like yeah just I just have it doesn't have to be on the phone or like on a mic on the video game it could be quite literally like chat yeah the one thing though I always wonder about is if this person has the ability to make a phone call I'm assuming she's calling from a landline yeah cuz then isn't sending a text
5:03 faster right to somebody can you text pizza places no text anybody or 911 are can we text 911 or maybe she doesn't have her phone yeah maybe she's in a situation she's using a landline yeah so let's say your phone's confiscated you can't use your landline phone then then what you send the pigeon great ████ she's dead but did she called 911 a billionaire shot it out of the sky I was just thinking that send the pigeon to the pizza place yeah I got shot down I'm assuming it's 911 you write a handwritten letter yeah you call them on the landline and then you say you melt the wax press it on the envelope oh we can't be Pizza it's say let's say it's not pizza no more because they need a new one now everyone knows the pizza one oh you have to go like oh yeah Spectrum can I order uh yeah my my can I
5:54 order the movie the pay-per-view movie cuz my my my man really likes uh movie he loves Jennifer Lopez Million Dollar Baby he likes UFC at home what happens if it's after hours after business hours now somebody will pick up Spectrum oh whoa you picked up hey uh cable's out uh the internet is not working so the thing is you're you're trying to call 911 not call Spectrum to call 911 for you D we just need you're already on the phone with 911 and talk code trying to talk code get the cops to come without saying spectrum is a good one dude hi Spectrum yeah what's my address yeah whyi is not but my husband's fist is cuz it's hitting me full connection it just makes me
6:44 laugh that like in the middle like like what you were saying in the middle of this heated situation they're like oh yeah I actually I am a little hungry like dude what the ████ is going on bro like yeah yeah yeah I want to keep you in his house but yeah you use the phone make sure you get extra pepperoni and maybe it's one of those things where like now I'm yeah like get me something to eat now it's ████ up man it's like okay I'll I'm going to call the pizza place that's three digits only you know the sad ████ is how many times has this actually played out where they're getting their ass beat and they're like I'm ████ hungry from beating your ass and they actually have to call the pizza and then they come over and they're they just witness some ████ and then the pizza boy is like damn man that was ████ crazy and just goes home yeah Oh you mean like from the pizza gu perspective oh yeah that's pretty hard yeah that is crazy that
7:34 happened when I was living in Little Tokyo my upstairs neighbor used to so audibly beat his wife oh my God like so loudly like me and the other neighbor we would hear it all the time but it's like one of those things were like do I get involved and then like finally I called the cops and then they came and then of course they didn't do anything they were just like it's fine and they just left cuz she goes no nothing happened yeah exactly that's exactly what happened she was like it's fine we're we're okay but it's like they leave why did you call a c why you so loud when I hit you yeah and it just continued and there's nothing you could really you know cuz like another thing that a lot of people don't realize about domestic violence is like a lot of the time when cops respond to those they are the most at risk the cop themselves D because you have a guy who's at a heightened state of like I'll kill anyone over this ████ and it's like usually when the cop gets in between it that's why you see all these like uh gunfights right out the porch of a house
8:26 that was over a domestic abuse call it's like so weird they're so angry think some dude at his most passionate rage it's kind of a really unsa they make you hungry though makes you want a pizza dog and that's why that brings me to a sech price Pizza Hut's new Super Bowl commercial and why there's backlash we're trying to get everyone on board with this like physical activity makes you hungry no matter if it's malicious or not yeah come on dude exercise exercise or maybe the problem suppresses domestic rage like a good pepperon yeah they're just hangry what if they should eat a Snickers commercial Snickers commercial was like oh my God you feeling like yourself you do you think Snickers PR went through that scenario yeah it was on the board do you think they're sitting there being like okay talk about all the things you do when you're hangry well I get really
9:17 annoying I can get ████ I physically abuse my partner like emotionally too emotionally don't forget that and then pizza's like that's right all right so we're going to have a commercial it's like hey you a ████ come over here and he goes hold on feeling like beating your wife have a pepperoni it probably would have done well in the super brow commercials maybe and then they eat it and then they just like oh ████ well all right he was definitely hangry yeah I'm sure after some time they're going to have to think of a new one cuz the pizza one's getting around kind of yeah men are starting to find out I know maybe Chinese food too hey can I get some can I order some Chinese food I'm getting Kung Pow right I can I come I you I love I love that's the joke like that joke that makes me I despise you
10:09 now I'm getting figure out you can't even say that normally did [Music] that
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