0:00 [Music] russian state tv urged putin to quote wipe the uk off the map holy ████ nuke oh my god underwater they got those that's pretty extreme dude so does that mean it goes like this it goes i think that's exactly what the scientific cause you gotta go stay underwater first right before it comes out and then comes down right i thought it just hits it from underwater oh ████ so it'll no that's just what i make up in my mind so what they're saying is it'll blow up underwater and it'll give a tsunami and it will cause a over 500 foot tsunami that will that will go all the way through to like the highest peak of like mountains in the uk as well that's what sucks they don't have big mountains like us if they only have big
0:50 but don't they know that uh london has the highest concentration of umbrellas that's very good point everyone else they're just gonna everyone owns one and they it will not even affect them that's so true putin needs new strategists and mary poppins well but you have to also think because a nuclear bomb going off in a place like that with all that ocean yeah would cost so many sharknados tomatoes that's the real part of my question i was like what about all the sea lions that's gonna spin off it's gonna happen yeah and obviously it's shark news and they would mutate because it's radioactive so they would just have legs by the end of the night to sci-fi sci-fi channel future again i need to uh use my science eyes because hugo sucks at brainstorming i was like where is it trying to attack okay we got liverpool right there they don't even got a right picture of look at that you see that's ireland they
1:40 chopped it up in half dude all of northern england and scotland is chopped up in half is that what they're trying to say they're going to blow up half of uh almost all of ireland yes because ireland's like this big and then there's this whole part here with like liverpool and all that i didn't know russia and england had beef well this acquiring a whoopi goldberg because they're all white anyway so russian state tv had actually seen a threat issued uh to the uk after president vladimir putin's propagandist in chief dimitri casella be off or whatever said the uk should be targeted with nuclear weapons right just out of nowhere we should target them with nuclear weapons that's the hip shoot idea of the day the threat comes after boris johnson was
2:30 accused of suggesting that the uk could use nuclear weapons against russia without consulting nato first i thought it all happened because boris appeared in ukraine out of nowhere and then like hanging out and then he decided to send more aid and troops to ukraine to help and then it was the first time where like troops were going in something like well uh kaselyof i'm gonna just call him kasely off from now on claims that britain which alongside many other countries has supplied weapons and aid to ukraine couldn't possibly hope to match russia in the nuclear war so he was definitely already aiding ukraine uh and kiselyoff said that and what will happen after boris johnson's words about a retaliatory strike on russia why do they threaten vast russia with nuclear weapons while they are only a small island the island is so small that one sarmat missile is enough to drown it once and for all
3:21 that is some crazy ass statement man damn wow yeah man i think that russia's desperate like this war went on way too long they're gonna get completely ████ bankrupt like did you see that there's a graph of like um they're like showing how like if they just hold out for the war for 10 days russia would their whole economy will get ████ wait what do you mean like um because the sanctions and everything and on top of that they're spending so like well they're they probably have a lot of money that you can't account for because they're all like you know there's like underground you know what do you call it like offshore shorts like offshore ████ all the billionaires and the government there yeah there's probably a lot of money that we can't like account for but if you go based off of their like gdp the econom the the russian economy and
4:11 things like that this guy showed a calculation of uh like when the ukraine war started and then like if they can hold out for like 10 days-ish then russia's uh like money will deplete and all this ████ would ████ up i don't get that though it's been longer than 10 days i know so it's i guess that person was wrong [Laughter] so so this russian tv guy says um the russian missile sarmat ak satan 2 the world's most powerful is capable of destroying an area the size of texas or england a single launch boris and there is no england anymore he then added another option to plunge britain into the depths of the sea is the russian underwater robotic drone poseidon it approaches the target at a one kilometer depth with a speed of 200 kilometers per hour there is no way to stop this underwater drone it has a warhead with a capacity
5:02 of up to 100 megatons that's crazy the explosion of this thermonuclear torpedo close to britain's shores will raise a giant wave a tsunami up to 500 meters or 1640 feet high but why would they start that they know that everyone's going to blast them up to hail right after i know they would probably just at least go down eliminating the entire nation but this is this is what posturing is all about right you're trying to say like please don't attack us because like we'll get you real good you know what i mean like i like the idea of russia going we're gonna either blow up texas or uk you have 72 hours to come up with the dopest song from one of these places it's like that's a new tv show it's like american idol global song contest i think texas is ████ if they don't like country music oh that's true i would definitely want to ask that first cause that's their little thing that's
5:52 their niche what if they really like barbecue and the country song is about barbecue though do you think russia likes barbecue i don't know maybe we gotta maybe we gotta pull from like paw wall or something you know you gotta get some like got any unreleased bangers yeah we're like can we can we bring some of that back dude you know like the perfect time for paul wallace come back man oh wow i love that we need you paw wall it's all the country the country's just on you man paul saves texas dude back please there is so much sensationalism going on right now with all this stuff because this is i mean first of all this is not new they've had this plan for a long time obviously we have plans to take out every ████ country on earth too it's part of like what they do at the defense department they can come up oh yeah exactly melt antarctic though for some reason i thought you're gonna say plan b
6:42 that's it but that's just part of you know it's game of thrones baby yeah right we're all trying to be a big empire but then they're acting like russia is is this is extra from russia when we all do this ████ to each other which is it's part of the sensationalist um thing about no all america is the light america is world police we're shining city on the hill we're just trying to bring democracy to the world because everybody doesn't like democracy and everybody deserves freedom they don't like our freedoms no yeah we have to fight them over there so they don't have to fight over here i saw um putin saying like we're gonna officially declare war on ukraine or something and i'm like you've been in war i'm like what's up with all those explosions then isn't that like the game started already i think that ████ was a military exercise that was their liberation oh so they're not in war yet no so they failed at the liberation and now they must declare that was the collateral
7:33 damage of them trying to liberate ukraine what what what like stories from russia and the war do you guys even trust because i don't even know what to think like i hear so many different conflicting stories constantly yeah everyone's like oh that's actually ukraine popular i know that's the gall's there for sure yeah that's fire yeah that's good i've seen that on the russian side though right he's settling the ████ territories you know steven just said that the uh that ukraine kiev pilot was also just fake the ghost of kim we've been saying that the whole ████ time yeah i think that was just foreign yeah they actually finally admitted it yeah that like got all strapped up to go oh yeah they even say like uh the president what's his name um zielinski when he's doing all these meetings with politicians they're saying that's all staged it's a photo and i'm like what do you mean stage like it's like they have a set they're at universal studios and they're like in
8:23 different you know or because those buildings it's a photo opportunity like we're like so zelinski's wearing like these fatigues and like it looks like he's out there like fighting a war and like like has a collision of coffin ████ and then nancy pelosi's in the pants who's just going like this and they're they're all some people are saying nancy pelosi um what's his name um borrister all of these leaders aren't actually in ukraine they're saying like they're somewhere else she's fighting the front lines bro she got a helmet on and she's out there it wouldn't make more sense that's her style for if it was going to happen anyway it would make more sense for zielinski to leave ukraine and take these photos with different people in romania it's like sending other world leaders to the hot zones you know right right and it is even zelinski a good shot we don't know what his like ████ like military background is we know his cod score is pretty good though yeah kd is really good sick it's like he's
9:13 killed him i heard his dance scores really good too because he did dancing with the stars he didn't win though he didn't win no but he's good it's hard to tell right because which one is ukrainian propaganda to scare russians which one's russian propaganda which one's american propaganda like keep track of it remember when um the first iraq war was going down like with with bush senior and there was this little girl who went to the u.n and she was telling everybody about how iraqis were taking babies and putting them into incubators to kill them and it turned out to be a totally ████ story that nobody even checked out but our media parroted it everywhere to say like we need this war we gotta ████ iraqis aren't even people they're killing babies incubators we're doing it right now with russia if you watch our media they're dehumanizing the
10:03 ████ out of of russian citizens saying that they're all like down for for killing all like slot uh slaughtering ukrainians killing like babies and all this listen with every yeah and they'll say that like there's a mom who's found with a little a mind attached to her child and she was dead and and the russians put the mind between her and her child so that when a soldier pulled her away it would blow them up blow them both up ████ like that that just makes so so it makes our um us citizenry fine with indiscriminately killing russians but i think with them uh with now i think it's pretty sick how we can see what's really happening in ukraine there's people vlogging in ukraine there's people vlogging in ████ russia and then you can see the world kind of come together and be like man this warship's ████ crazy why are we doing this this is stupid and then you try to
10:54 get your world leaders to be more accountable for their game of thrones and just be like quit ████ doing that ████ quit killing peasants and for your ████ gain you know you know what i think is kind of a nice correction that is also kind of sad is it also shows the futility of social media like nothing that you hashtag is gonna ████ stop this war yeah oh say that don't say that how many people with ukrainian flags on their twitter account do you still see they ████ left that ████ but i think like war kind of does show you the reality like we went way too long thinking all these like self-servicing things are effective but like when real war happens it's like you have to have you have to be fighting it with real war it's funny you say that because i haven't seen you post one gofundme for ukraine one thing he didn't um he wasn't funding um that but he was retweeting all those yeah oh my god awareness i was
11:44 only looking at your ig i didn't look at your twitter i'm on the anti sign i go to no fund me and he just takes money dude i didn't see any photo yeah i didn't see any photo with a hashtag stand with ukraine so yeah i see we know yellow or blue we all did it but not you because i stand with you i mean it's an inside job all of it apparently there's a beer that is named putin as a ████ and that's on sale in the u.s now to raise money for ukraine well that'll stop the war man there's a pretty cool um ████ i forgot his name but he has a video on youtube breaking down all the people who profited from afghanistan and uh or the iraqi war and uh pretty much all the uh all the conflicts that green wall no it's a it's the same guy mr beast that was on um i think his name is john something
12:35 um he basically did one about how uh liberal policies are destroying major cities um and it was it was on um washington post or something like that so but he's yeah he's like a youtuber but he's a sick ass journalist like he's doing some really good homework you know yeah [Music]
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