0:00 [Music] science which i love by the way we love science too a lot of days people like be like i don't believe in science anymore or they throw around like check your science that you throw that around too oh check it check your sign so science is helping us understand at last what it was like to ████ a caveman oh really real ████ science dude answering the real questions and ████ cornhub only cavemen what about cave women i think that's what they meant put on the hat when you say that and they'll feel better yeah which hat the joe biden one oh okay now ask it thank you what about cave and women that's tight man cave x cave x uh yeah uh yeah that's more on brand that's more now i feel good about it so there are
0:50 there are thousands of mammalian bones that were found inside of many caves and uh over the over this long history it has it has been thought that this cave was um primarily inhabited by male cavemen so it was a gay cave it was a gay brothel no it has to be a brothel not no not male caveman male cave bears which you know teeny up there but actual actual brown bears right relatives of brown bears not white polar bears yeah but resting on the surface of the of that cave right um because this is like these caves also have water and like near the surface there's also human jaw bones found damn they ate the ████ cavemen that could
1:40 be and um they radiocarbonated these things and revealed them to be one of the oldest uh known modern humans in europe how old they're still fighting these old ass bones in europe they're still finding them dude those europeans suck at finding ████ i mean they've been around there so long and they're still finding new stuff they just never look for sure i understand egypt because things can be covered in sand and stuff but like come on dude like how many caves does europe have well they're already driving the wrong side of the road how do you how long do you think it takes that's true you know why because the friendships are ████ lazy dude the french the spanish that they're always yeah yeah they're not doing anything they complained about america yeah wearing scarves and ████ yo and berets they're just sleeping all day and ████ dude it's taking many siestas and surrendering all the time almost exclusively oh yeah i don't even know war that they won before napoleon so part of part of what they found when
2:31 they were extracting dna from this fine which was in 2015 from the java they found the end of the this individual is male 69 neanderthal which is the highest concentration ever encountered in early modern human and around three times the amount found in present-day europeans in asians whose genetic makeup is roughly one to three percent due to just dilution over the years right so this dude got a lot of neanderthals six to nine percent wow yeah which is 69 or six to nine six to nine but if you put them together at 69. hey science and science really liked that too yeah they loved it they're big fans so because the genome contains large stretches of uninterrupted neanderthal sequences they calculated that the jaw's owner is likely to have had a ancestor as recently as four to six generations ago so their like great grandpa was a neanderthal it's like a great great
3:21 grandparent or a great great great grandparent four generations right yeah yeah great great great so what's their ████ style like so they say that they did a doggy in the ass mostly they never write that like i would actually really assume that doggy style would have been the way to go default would they call it doggy style at a time before dogs were domesticated well man's best friend might have come early how do chimps do do a mission mostly yeah they start with eating their ass first and then they go into it they do the foreplay they also do they also do little frogs you see that they jack off yeah yeah we pulled it up here it's great you did i think in that video joe wouldn't stop saying fifi bag which made me uncomfortable personally i had to go to church after that's a fifi bag so joe could not stop saying that so amphibian fifi bag
4:11 hopefully he doesn't keep that tradition alive in this video i'm hoping though we'll see i hope for a lot of things uh so they're saying that you know they're that they have they believe that if you look at all of this stuff and you put it all together you can kind of tell a story with the way that like you know the genome has moved throughout like a detective yeah damn yeah you could be like they started off making out in this pile of fire right here and then they slowly moved their way over there and then that meant talking they slowly ripped off the pelts and ████ went for titties first turned on some kenny g dude cleared the table of all the spearheads so they believe the first one axes and ████ ████ pottery so they believe that the
5:03 first the first ████ occurred 120 000 years ago because of the jawbone they could find that out yeah because [Laughter] an overbite over time look it's not even plugged in that's how the modern human job came to be overbite and then that's how the new blow job started happening good old-fashioned sucking so the there's a belief right due to all this and just to really because this is a lot of data right but but there's a belief that our microbiome is working correctly today because we picked up micro organisms from neanderthals who were hoped who were they believe kissing at the time oh and that helped develop microbiome yeah help develop the microbiome and help
5:54 pass it along through generation from kissing swap and spit yeah they were ████ making out back then they knew what that ████ was it was invented in french then it wasn't invented in france yeah they rebranded that ████ this is the french kiss right but we don't know but we don't know they could have gone oh it could have been like a peck now they they were swapping you know they were ████ i think it was a tongue it's had to be a little bit gross monkeys kiss they do all of it i see monkeys kiss don't they do that in like the domesticated ones and the zoos are you know trapped yeah and i see them kiss them that's at universal studios but they don't like map each other down right cause they just go like it's just like the orange like they have two orange peels i don't think yeah i don't think they're using their opposable thumb to grab and face i bet they are though i think i would i'll give you some push back on that anything i think they do back to the doggy style i think they do
6:45 yeah so they believe that that you know neanderthals and early modern humans would would be interbreeding a lot obviously because that's just who was around yep that's just what happened back then yeah what else you're gonna do and then the neanderthal numbers started to dwindle towards the end of their existence because humans ████ them out humans kind of ████ them out yep and they broke their backs as well they helped them out they're saying some of the some of the uh ethnicities that existed in the past are not here today what's that some of the ethnicities or groups that like were around in the past or like like define the past well like so like ancient egyptians are not the same as a current day egyptians or like even with japan um ancient japanese dna is not the same as like there was a time in history where um like chinese dna or
7:35 like that area came okay mixed in with the indigenous but i think this is genghis khan genghis kham that's like tootin cam and dude tootin camo was like three foot tall oh three feet dude king king two was like three foot tall and he died at like age 13 because of how much ████ incest that went down yeah but damn 100 i heard cleopatra had a was it both the gender type the the pc word for someone that has both genitals gigantic titties though yeah because uh back then they thought that that was a a beauty like having both like it's it's it's rare nature stuff whatever right it's like an air fryer do everything it's like a firefighter you could do both you could have a lot of fun they had air fryers back then by the way scientists can't figure out how i was just telling you about air fries remember you did very relevant we just went to the getty villa recently they had an air fryer ████
8:27 air fryer in the wall egyptians actually the egyptian section i was like yo they have air fryers here yeah they found a 30 000 year old air fryer that's some ancient alien ████ dude and had a steel tray bin and everything yeah just got to put it in the right angle of the sun and the sun will do the work they had to light the fire in the bottom and still had the price tag from sears says black and decker that's a very old brand yeah wow it was one of the exhibits it was a main exhibit everyone loved it yo well what did you do at the gated museum no i just went to go check it out and then check out your fries see if there was an air fryer i went to go shopping i want to see what air fryer is you know what though like um when you see ancient ████ at a museum versus a pawn shop or like where you can actually there's a price tag to it it changes like an art gallery where there's a ████ ancient rug and you're like damn it's just ████ 300 000 dollars when i'm at a museum i'm like
9:17 damn that's old right but then like because of value yeah you know but you don't go like that you don't go like one day no i don't feel like can we put a price tag on this ████ like what's up dude cause we tell everybody yeah i wanna i actually want that so i could be like i can own this one day and then i can leave it in my house and then it'll appreciate you know what i mean like like how mr winn right here he has he's the largest private collector of ████ classical art some of those things in museums are owned by people they're just leasing it to the museum yeah see my broadcast didn't even know that dude they're leasing it to them yeah they're like crazy i'm sure there's a price if you inquire you know you just go you can let them borrow it so that means you're ████ making rent on the 300 000 rug we gotta get some artifacts yo and lisa king tut was two foot seven foot seven that's like hot
10:08 dog yeah you little bro are you serious can you tell us husband nah but king tut was two foot six inches in and a half so like they don't even make a dyson that's short in 700 bc like the like the the romans and ████ their helmets were like this ████ big they were like tiny little i swear to god man helmets dude that's crazy because they kept running the shades they're all stupid what if those are cups no no it was a ████ helmet it said helmet and then like a chest piece was like it wasn't that big at all the war museum in france when you look at like uh napoleon's they were like 11 year olds they look like this yeah but napoleon was notorious for how small he was no but his soldiers like all the armors yeah it was all like this that's what i got i thought they were child soldiers they could be oh maybe i don't know no but they're petite they were small though [Laughter]
10:58 that's how they put all their armor on too walk through the ████ wall yeah just from hook yeah oh ████ i had that wrong no because i was looking at centimeters king ████ king tut was two foot two shut the ████ up it keeps getting smaller and two foot two hey we would kick the ████ out of king tut no two feet is like this he was two foot two inches so he was like bro humans evolved dog they evolved to be bigger that's crazy dude tyka's ████ 42 inches dude look at quizno that's impossible and taco would kick the ████ out of king tut and cuz nine years younger you're a double leg back then that's how they should they need to market it you want the king tut size like that's how he had a gold coffee because it was ████ tight he's like one foot eight that's taller than a fat tuesday bro because they had him in there like this
11:49 tuesday from king tooth the sarcophagus is whatever they were like they weren't that big they were like this that was like this size i've seen dicks bigger than that yo wait what [Music] [Applause] [Music] you
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