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Grad Student Started a Business That Charges up to $10K to Name Your Baby

#confirmedcatholic#tenthousand#strippername#missionimpossible#phoenix
the transcript auto-captions · entered into evidence

0:00 [Music] so an nyc grad started this business and uh it's been going very well she charges up to ten thousand dollars to name your baby what why she's a professional baby namer for 10 grand 10k is kind of on the high end if you want one of those good names you know when you buy something expensive and it has to be good so when you have a kid and then you're like you got one i don't want to ████ when you buy that name you're like there's got to be a good name oh so the price makes it makes you feel like you got something placebo where you're like i bought a good name therefore it is a good but are they like names that already exist like yeah and they're like ████ or is it like she's making ████ up like it

0:50 sounds crazy clairvont clairvont actually yeah like is it like good pretty good yeah i mean as far as it says here yeah she generates uh like i guess the base rate's like 1500 bucks this ████ uses a ████ ████ like a little searching generator the wu-tang one oh that's so funny your name will be tyler's gambino he goes fifteen hundred dollars for extra 200 i'll get waka on this nick you want walking to name your baby extra 200 bruh actually he tripping he's another 200. he'll make the name my boy big nuke is going to hop on the baby name as well you don't know if you think about like if you're starting a company you can hire like those people that develop brands and marketing

1:40 they could just make a name logo all that ████ for you so maybe it's kind of like that you know it's like she makes a whole wait is there like a whole process like they figure out like when your baby's gonna be born it finds their birth chart or whatever she makes a pitch deck i think it's all kind of like bespoke like uh yeah she'll just like suggest different names and if uh if the parents have like a business or something that they run then to make the baby's name on brand with everything she'll develop like a jk news baby she she does like a branding kit that's lazy like just name your own kid you know it's like that's the fun part though isn't it you could name them where the ████ you want i don't relate to this part but a lot of people do say it's really hard to name their kid because they don't want to ████ it up yeah but i don't i don't unders i never understood that but i heard that a lot really how can you ████ it up i feel

2:31 like they go okay so i want my kid to like uh be unique so i want to get a unique name but then also kids with unique names also get picked on in their early life so i don't want to get picked on and i don't want to give my average name because they might end up being like they're just so many like back and forth in their mind that they're like i don't know what to choose i actually knew knew a kid who might one of my old friends his little brother when he was born they named him phoenix but then i guess like growing up he was getting bullied so much that they legally changed his name what's the buoy what do they call a penis that's better they legally change his name to phillip afterwards how do you bully a kid named phoenix like are you gonna rise from the ashes today nice meaningful things like i want to give them i want to give them names that'll get them bullied like punk ass ████ or something the

3:21 money probably she probably puts a lot of thought in like different angles and how they can yeah she honestly he's probably a bulletproof name what's considered a ten thousand dollar name though yeah oh do they have any names yeah does she have examples of a ten thousand dollar name yeah no it's because the the thing basically what puts the value in it is she takes a lot of time to kind of get to know everything about the family what's the experience yeah and it's kind of like she really does study like you know what what means a lot to these channels what are the pillars what are like the buried treasures within their like family story and then we'll come up with a name that shares kind of the same meanings so it's the branding package that joe was talking about but exactly so it's not really like what what is the hot like they're not gonna just go oh it's jaden obviously name it like it's just their life that's the meaning behind john obviously can you imagine going through all that she just goes it's jaden

4:12 what if she was like i have to live with you for three months you're gonna pay me ten thousand dollars and then i'll give you the name after and she just lines that ████ up all year so she never pays rent she gets paid ten thousand dollars every time gives you a basic basic ass name that's what i think i like stripper names but i just wish it wasn't a ████ stripper name like what's a stripper name like candy destiny what's a mail stripper name cookie cookie rhino rhino ryder it's something cool bro imagine we got rhino coming to the stage just like a gold or a gray like thong you got a little horn on it you got a little horn on the on the banana hammock i think guy stripper names are like

5:02 wrestling names yeah like something with cyclops bulk hogan bulge hulkish remember we went to the uh we went to the chippendales thing to film the ████ oh yeah they did have names on there they did i wasn't reading them they were like kind of considered cool boy names and ████ oh like that's what they have like laser or some ████ only that kid don't bully phoenix bully ████ lasers laser phoenix could be a stripper named too though phoenix is fire that's i like phoenix they could find any way to bully like tycoon taika so taika's name is just this is taika right and then one day he came home from school and he goes he goes skyler keeps calling me ty but his name is ████ skyler exactly but

5:52 he was like but he's like keeps calling me taiki and i keep telling him it's taika and he feels sad because they just feel sad right now i might try calling him skylee see what happens the next day he started he's like hey what's up skylee you go you called me skyler you got it now they're best friends yeah see so it's not skylee and tykey and they're best friends now at that age it's like they don't even know what the ████ they're talking about you just get sad no matter what right you just discovered being sad you're like i'm gonna be sad yeah but it is true like you can just find any way to bully a kid over his name if you just are bullying the kid everyone needs to rhyme my name with dick all the time dude nick the dick yeah you don't even have to rhyme it it could just be the way my name sounds dumb when you say it like that people people just call me trick

6:43 done i don't know what that means they call me a trick i got the most like low low-hanging fruit of like hey christian are you christian i'm like like do you go to church that's too easy to roll my ████ eyes are you actually christian huh are you actually christian it's happening your ████ again asking you god damn it faster man yeah i was actually confirmed catholic oh so yeah i was annoyed because i'm like they're kind of right though yeah nice it's kind of contradicting yeah i know i can't get away from it what does it mean to be a confirmed catholic like are you unconfirmed until like you gotta get a blue check [Laughter] by the pope there's like there's like sacraments that you have to do so like i think it's just catholicism that has it where it's like you get baptized then you have like first

7:34 communion then confession and then you get confirmed you gotta go an octagon there's a whole like yeah with the youth pastors yeah you gotta fight a couple of devils you know you got yeah you gotta like gotta do some exorcisms and ████ i did that i did that ████ when i was like 13 years old yeah my mom yeah my mom made us like go to this like church school me and my brother like every weekend we just sat there and just like ████ around and then we had to get baptized so you're confirmed catholic as well yeah did you do the ████ mesh screen like yeah i jacked after my sister's friends oh you never did that competition yeah you had nothing to confess no there's no ████ wall no like we have to look at him and be like i did this this this so you get to see his reaction to everything he was he like

8:25 oh you're dirty what's the crazy thing you confess to the i confess i got horny to mission impossible too it seemed like the lasers impossible he was so close to the floor participation the the girl from mission impossible too was so hard who was the girl i heard zoe saldana or whatever i don't remember what scene was it let's find it just type in mission impossible to girl it must be so fun to be a priest because like you could get with your other pre-zombies and just laugh all ████ oh it's dandy newton from she's from like uh westworld now let me see what is fandy now that's a ████ holy name you gotta make fun of that chick also adding who the ████ is before a name always makes a pleasure

9:15 that's a perfect name to make fun of sandy yeah newton this is it's her she's in man i really hope i get all the sins out the way if i miss one it's like useless because apparently you have to confess to everything or else it's pointless and i'm like why because if you miss one it's like ah ████ i forgot i gotta go back you have to go into detail like when you said it was mission possibly were they like which woman [Laughter] he just goes

10:07 the screen you just see the screen kind of bend in he's like this would you have said if you're like i got horn in mission impossible too and he goes there were no boys in that movie now you must confess to lying [Music] you

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