0:00 you know what I mean like if you live elsewhere it's the house pricing is reasonable everything I was like that's why you can't pop out like kids and be more family oriented outside and working on a new show where you're always reading the News That's depressing isn't it you want to bring your kid into this but then yeah he's always talking about the Japanese birth rate needs help but he's not having kids I probably have to go and find some Japanese girls [Music] laughs what's up everybody welcome to another episode of careful boys today we have Ellen Kim with us [Applause] and we also have Christian Farina over there also we have Chris Sosa who will be moving to New York soon so
0:50 we're not going to see him as often and I'll be back I'll be back they got pizza they got pies we got a couple sbaros something to the water man The Bagel so different succot something about the bagels man all right check this out so in our parents Generation all of us would be pretty geriatric you know what I mean like we would already be having like five kids we're all coal miners and ████ deep into our careers we probably look way older than we at actually are right that's their generation right um but now we're all like pushing that like a like we're preserving that youth a lot a lot longer right the only person
1:40 in here um that got a kid is Ellen right good job sometimes my question is my question is all right so do you see having kids as like because Chris mentioned earlier that's it his mom said when you have kids your life is ████ over done straight up said that and do you think do you think society today is putting that ████ off for as long as possible because of those reasons because our generation is the birth rate's lower we're not having as much kids as our parents generation and our grandparents generation and on top of that if you live in a big city you're getting married later or not at all and you don't ████ have kids so I guess it depends huh well Korea they said that they're gonna go extinct same with Japan Korea has the same problem
2:30 because I mean look at the economy everyone's you know like it's it's different there like it's it's more about career and you need a high y'all can't go extinct salary to have a kid I don't no more K-pop and no more anime what are we gonna do that's a good point though is it the money thing and also stress like I'm meeting so many women right now who have to go to IVF uh they have to do that because they can't get pregnant and but then those women are probably in their 30s right hitting 40s right so so that's another thing too is that women are trying to get pregnant much later on in life but they're not told that after 30 you're um you're saying your eggs are already like 75 done not even that it's
3:20 the stress look as a mom right and I was a singer like a single mom and then you know how were you when you had your baby no but that's an average age average age but then at that time it was like your career is ████ over you know and like people saying that ████ everyone like dancers were saying it like I said that sir I was like I don't think so but like the industry was like you're done like it wasn't my time it wasn't like you're not supposed to have a kid and then like even for family they're like your career is going to be done because obviously and look at you now prove them all wrong and it's done but even as a mom how much money you have to make to make to get your kid education
4:12 make sure you're living in like a space where you feel safe especially if you are a single mom I had to move over to Sherman Oaks because it's just me and her right so that's what they don't tell you in America is Affordable means dangerous what do you mean oh yeah okay like affordable rent and like paying less in La that means you're ████ in a war zone yeah and then you gotta pay for that that local so you're paying premium for not to get robbed and then the school system like if you're not trying to pick oh my gosh I looked at one private school here in La it's 33k for kindergarten kindergarten kindergarten that's somebody's ████ job dude so it's like you start learning as a mom like you're like oh ████ I really gotta relocate because of the education the safety then you're like working how many jobs to sustain that
5:04 life you know and then of course like woman today it's not like it's not tribal anymore you're not gonna go someone's gonna go grab the meat and the you know someone else is going to attend it together everyone's hunting everyone's Gathering so woman with the stress on top of caught like you know hustle culture yeah it's so hard it is hard because everything used to be in teams back in the day villages because like you I remember like in our parents generation right like if you're a part of a church or whatever um there were so many people that would just meet up and like all the kids kind of took care of each other and then the parents had time to kind of chill and do other errands and stuff so there was that Community aspect but I do see now a lot more single parents a lot more
5:55 like parents with just one or two kids and they're doing everything there's no grandma grandpa all that stuff so I'm like how yeah so like this generation right especially like in a city like LA or whatever by I mean back in the day if you're already like 20 something you're already married and popping out kids but now that's like it seems like almost impossible you mean I'm most women I talk to they're like they don't want kids or they're going to think about having kids around like 40. wow are they like freezing eggs maybe freezing as if they have money but it's so expensive to do this so expensive but you also don't want to like there's people that want kids but you don't want to have a kid if you can't support them and raise them right I feel like it's just everything combined with culture and society and the way things are like inflation prices
6:47 like you said more people are single doing their own thing um it's tough It's hard to take care of yourself before you take care of another humans that's the hard part yeah here's the thing as a mom I'm just gonna throw it out there I thought the same thing right everyone's already telling me okay so then I have the kid and I'm like so afraid I'm like I don't know but then like seeing her looking at me and I'm looking at her I'm like oh ████ I I need to do this there's no option there's no other option yeah you're turning to an animal almost I started turning into like rare like like animals oh my God so do you think it made you more of a hustler it made me more responsible oh it made me like get my ████ together and like if and then find Value in my life because of her and then it switched who
7:38 I was who I who I was like yeah I always was like a people pleaser always working for the industry oh you want me to cut my hair like this but you know like but when I had Kaya it was like you know what I don't even have ████ time for that I don't got time for that ████ like look I need to get a job this this I need to get her education so I know society says it's hard to have a child though it flipped for me it made me a better person because someone's mirroring me all the time like if she says something weird and I'm like that's on me like what am I doing in front of you that you're acting this way so like she made me like I always tell her like you saved my life like you really did because if I kept going in the industry the way it was going I don't know who I would be today how was it going like right when you had
8:29 your ████ it was going good though but you ruined my career well if I'm talking like just super narcissistic wise like Just Me Myself and I yeah it was so great right like six pack you know I was like booking ████ and you know whatever but then it's like I meet people now and they're like I've gotten this couple times I'm like oh ████ they're like Ellen I just want to say like you're kind of a ████ back then but you're like really nice and I'm like oh ████ was I you know like was I going down that path I said that to her you could just start saying it to him
9:19 yes no but like you're probably just so honest when you're single and selfish and going for your career but I think that is I mean like if I had a kid right now yeah I don't I don't want one right now because of the things that we talked about yeah watch this um no because of like the financial situation the way life is but like if I had a kid I know it would be fine like there's that mother and a lot of women do believe like I know some people where their purpose is just to have kids and like you know procreate and support that but also in this generation now we have different we're very entrepreneurs you know going for our dreams just with the access that we have so I think there's like that cultural Dynamic um that's true because some girls it seems like they get looked down upon for
10:10 wanting to be mothers and in some girls it's like it's like um you have to be CEO you have to do that and it's like why can't people just choose what they want that's what I'm saying being a mom helped me get to that path though yeah that's that's interesting because can I tell you my ████ perspective from your life like you need to hear it but like can I judge you for a minute like but just judge harsh okay because like I've known for for a while and um I I feel like I was kind of in the same boat as you before you had your kid like we were just trying to get whatever came and we're just trying to book everything right but I feel like after you had your kid I didn't really feel like you fell off at all but I felt like you transitioned more into being like a boss type figure I agree I saw that too even more things that you were the Catalyst
11:00 for like you started doing your own ████ more it looked like where you were booking people to be in your ████ oh that's what it looked like to me because I'm like oh Ellen's like doing her thing and you're the leader of more ████ which is like is that because having a kid changed your look on like what how to how to live your career yeah thank you that's so sweet that's what I thought thanks everyone because like everyone wants to be that right we all want to be like we all want to go from trying to get jobs to being the one at the head of the job and people that want to work for us you know what I mean that switch was I'm not ████ waiting for you to give me a job I'm gonna make this job happen yeah and then it and then I'm glad that like I care about like people because it's like because I want to do it with friends and I wanted like I want you to get paid I want and I want us to have fun with this
11:50 so you know what ████ I'm gonna make that ████ happen yeah so yeah I don't know uh yeah so then in some cases like if you're if you're single and you think about a kid you go oh then I'm not going to be able to go out or do these auditions or whatever but then when you actually have one then that's the drive for me makes you go I gotta get my ████ together yeah because I have this little kid looking at me and I'm like you know God made kids cute because if they weren't like drive you crazy you know what I'm saying like so I got I got to witness that firsthand uh through my little sister she she had a child at a 20. and she's the baby sister and everybody's like whoa like it was like a surprise and stuff and uh yeah like you know we all we all got her back but at the end of the day she has to raise a child and um she's uh she's a powerful woman yo and I
12:43 got to like really like witness that you know I mean my my nephew just turned four uh um recently on the 13th and um yeah you know I could see like all the happiness and joy in her all of her uh like she works really hard like she owns her own house yo she's like she's the house owner here we go yes a house under owner she drives like 18 wheelers like she's a super like she's a super mom yo damn yeah yo so I really got to see that you know and uh um like just hella proud of her you know I mean like I'm like yeah because I know like with my sister like she has you know she's the younger sister so she was able to see me and my older brother like and see like how uh you know what to do what not to do and kind of follow what you know footsteps whatever but she already has that grind but now you have a child like you said it times tends it you know what I mean yeah it makes you step up yeah it makes you step up you know what I mean and so she put basically put the powers that
13:34 she already has and to now you know raising a child and you can see that through the child like the child's amazing you know what I mean and that's a reflection of how she is as a parent you know what I mean so good ████ me I'm proud of you yeah that ████ is so cool there's like it's kind of scary too when you see examples of like that's the best case scenario that something like that make you step up but we see people not Step Up see that's the other side of it too some people don't step up and they can't support their kid kind of similar situation with my sister she got accidentally pregnant super young I think she was 19 or 20 and she was kind of going down a rough path um but having the child like completely changed her and the same thing has a house family cars like like you figure it out but then there's people on the other side of it that that doesn't happen they have a kid and they stay
14:26 lazy reason they don't get that fight mode and then that kid suffers because of it so or they get a flight mode man I'm learning I'm learning like how to like because the way that she's like talked like communicating with her child and how she like breaks everything down and you know no really no whoopings yo it's just all conversations like Are You Gonna Keep crying okay do you go to the room and cry when you come out we can talk about it you know those type of things I'm like damn like witnessing my sister really break these things down and like I'm like I don't know where she gets it from but it's just it's that instinct you know what I mean of just knowing like you have no idea when you have a child but then you figure it out you know what I mean if yes because I feel like this generation is the one that's gonna really communicate to their children yeah a lot of people are parenting differently yeah it's very I give her choices like I I tell her the
15:16 hard truth of what certain things are like just for example sugar I showed her a video of like what sugar does at a very young age and she started crying and I was like but this is like it's diabetes losing a tall yeah like here you go I started crying but I was like this is real life girl like I'm not gonna paint this Disney ████ to you this is real life you want sugar you choose yeah and then she took it and so till today she'll be like I'm good like yeah she's gonna moderate herself now she's got her own choices one of the things my aunt said that she's like I didn't I didn't eat that much meat growing up and I'm like why he goes oh cause we just had to kill all the animals that we wanted to eat so then it was kind of a lot of work and then it's dirty and so you have to kill the chicken and all that and I'm all like oh damn so if everyone had to kill
16:07 their own meat a lot of people would not eat meat yeah there's a lot of dirty work for sure yeah and then yeah they saw death like to them it wasn't like a like a once in a great like she was like the reason why we had a lot of kids back in the days because she's like they won't all survive which one's gonna make it yeah she goes that's why we had a lot of brothers and sisters because one might get the ████ typhoid fever or whatever you know one might get on the Oregon Trail yeah after the axle breaks somebody's gonna die you know yeah and then so they had siblings die whatever and then so they're like yeah that's why we we popped out so many kids and then so she's like yeah and it was like you see death like and then people go to war they don't come back I didn't ████ like that's another thing too is war yeah so then I think like our generation is like we think we are mortal
16:58 yeah yeah we were kind of and we think we have forever to like pop out kids and all that stuff and I was like that's something that I didn't really think about until like recently I'm like yo I'm almost 40. and that's something that's like by this age my dad already had a couple yeah I think about that too yo I'm 29 my dad had three kids or at that by that point yeah me thinking like I was coherent enough to know when my parents were 40. you know what I mean like I remember them after the kids are like how old are your parents I'm like 45. you know what I mean but yeah I don't know it's crazy it trips it makes me sad because I I was thinking about how I remember when my dad turned 40 and I was already like sentient I was like six or something and I was making like he would always be like hey come here and like pull my gray hairs out man if you see any gray hairs like pull them out for me and I remember being old enough to be like damn good
17:48 right here's already gold yeah I don't even have a kid yet and I'm like older than he was in that memory like I'm older than the dude that I'm seeing in that and this is kind of depressing but if you think of it in the opposite perspective of you know if people are having kids later let's say when they're 40 you know there's some guys out there at 45 yeah if he did he still have kids yeah that they're 20 their parents are already 60 65 like the the relationship and the span that you have with your parents decreases as well and then if those kids way even longer like 35 to have kids their parents might never meet their grandkids so it's a it's an interesting effect that it's gonna happen should we like make babies
18:38 um I'm trying to turn into a boss female CEO soon really yeah that's one thing I don't like about it is that the climate created this fear of having kids that might not necessarily be true I think so I don't like that like I think so I don't have a kid now on purpose I did that like I purposely thought I was not ready because of what I've learned around me and it's not necessarily fact it's not you better call smack right now I've seen my sister do it I see my brother do it and they both have kids around the same age and my I have an older brother but I've seen them doing it they make it seem cool I'm in the group chat like it's me uh the siblings and my and my my parents that we're all in the group chat and it's always pictures of the nephews and I'm like man I don't get to post nothing like I don't get to share just put some stock photos
19:31 that's the thing you look one of those different articles is a reason to not have kids if you really read into it you're like oh that's bad this is bad that's not good it's like this is the world they're gonna come into and just living in La I think the the mentality here is so different because like it's affordable outside you know what I mean like if you live elsewhere it's the house pricing is reasonable everything else like that's why you can pop out like kids and be more family oriented outside of the you know and working on a new show where you're always reading the News That's depressing isn't it you want to bring your kid into this but then yeah he's always talking about the Japanese birth rate needs help but he's not having kids oh I probably have to go and find some Japanese girls yeah it's definitely the basis for it is
20:21 a lot of fear I feel like and you know Anthony do it but not it switched for me now I'm kind of like damn [Music]
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