0:00 put your hand down if you've never done a cocaine if you've never done it yeah what you make them do without me ask you you've done that you liar crack cow [Music] so cocaine has been synthesized in a tobacco plant wow that's good news that's illegal how here we go like the real theaters like the theaters oh like Regal Theaters yeah the the we're on the popcorn roller coaster and they're popping and there's vines coming out ████ pager from like 1990. silence your cell phone yeah you don't like Regal no I hate it what do you like do you like the UA
0:50 United Artists I'm an edge Loops guy dude I'm a Krikorian class I pick her nothing okay I do like I pick I do like I'm a snobby Ark like boy Elmo Drafthouse I've never been I think you'd like it I would love it I think is it better than I picked yeah it's like a cool it's like a cooler I pick how is it I pick is pretty fun yeah but I pick is like Tech it's like very like uh structural and then Alamo is like it has the illusion of being like down to earth and very like chill but it's still very strict about not ████ around during the movie and you can still buy a sandwich just still there's a bar there's a full bar right yeah it's it's like uh yes do they have servers yeah do they have the reclining chairs do those chairs that I pick are but it's more like it's like if hipsters butt I pick oh hey Bart this is not a disc just know that when you go to a movie
1:42 you have to go like 5 30 so you don't fall asleep honestly if someone invites me to watch a movie past eight I have to politely decline somebody said he would fall asleep I remember want to catch a matinee bar and it looks like this I swear to God the sun's going down with the credits I will not so if I'm like oh I've seen this movie before I'm like sure let's go so you got matinees only save money what's matinees thinking today what the ████ what's matinee I don't even speak normal English is like this guy Joe you made a business with this guy we're on YouTube okay that's why we don't have a film okay okay what's matinee Bart's like my dream is like writing a film and producing a movie he's like what's matinee by the way that's very correct okay so a team of resources at the Chinese what's the
2:32 screening working with a colleague from uh the UK have developed a way to synthesize cocaine using a tobacco plant whoa finally so synthesized so now they can smoke crack growing cocoa coca plants to produce cocaine you know it's like a big intensive project scientists have been looking for a way to produce it in a lab but all these efforts have not been have not seen progress because um those complex biochemistry in the cocoa plant and it's valuable byproduct obviously so now in this new effort researchers have not only figured out the biochemistry of the plant and the cocaine it produces have synthesized small amounts of cocaine by genetically engineering a type of tobacco plant to just make it in its leaves somebody in that lab is getting a call from a guy saying are you trying to cut
3:23 out the Colombians oh and then it's it's they're Chinese scientists right they go ████ you guy ████ you man ████ you man we met covert man we ████ you okay I'm not scared at you I saw Knuckles already that he's dead and it was boring after that it was boring Mexico was terrible time for the Pablo Esco Chang oh that's good so so people might be wondering why are they they doing this like are they just trying to make cocaine yeah or make better cocaine so they say that this is a size man so they say that they're doing this um to produce it for use in medical applications oh yes of course the medical applications control of course
4:15 let's do a bump in the ICU or something for pain brother I think they don't they still use codeine or something or codeine well no they use because it's very different from cocaine they use uh uh the other one the one the ████ Civil War One Morphine Morphine that is hot right now yeah at the hospital opiate though it's more from the heroin yeah morphine works pretty good unless you have kidney stones yeah that's the one thing beneath they put really put it into you and you still felt it yeah really that's what I mean to me like people good lucky like everyone I saw that whole Christmas okay you got morphine lucky and I'm like bro I'm in actual pain I'm not like ████ chilling there like oh this is so sick so if they gassed you to sleep would you
5:06 still be going oh honestly try to work here Steve you laugh that's my pain but yes yes did you watch your dick the whole time do they watch my dick the whole time I was I was passed out you were they put you to sleep the doctor saw your penis and they're like good for him though titty Stones pretty bad that was the last thing I remember hey let's go good for you request a lady doctor I did because I didn't want to be seen this game he didn't want that show up at his chart yeah because I know Steve he's like no way am I gonna wake up ████ lasts forever dude if it's on the chart if people know man you're like scientifically gay well because when I
5:56 was with my father-in-law um like medically again and then he was like he's like let's go have a beer outside so I was like okay and so we're sitting down and he's like he's like so um you know did did a guy doctor um do your surgery and then I'm like he's like that would mean you're gay right what no no they're my daughter but these are gay though you let another man touch your privates like that what kind of man are you what do you get yourself and you're like no no no no no no no Dad it was a surgery yeah but I I I specifically asked for a female surgeon and he goes okay cool yeah and then he's like so did she suck it no was she hot is she a babe that's pretty crazy that morphine couldn't keep that from hurting I know one can stop it what's better than death
6:47 nothing it was so bad though because they always assume you're a drug addict like if you're if you want pain meds they just assume you're a drug addict immediately especially in Vegas by the way oh really Vegas is actually I mean it's a great place to live I bet there's a lot of drug addicts too though but well that's the worst dude L.A doesn't have any yeah that's crazy they treat you more like you're a drug addict in Vegas yeah and so like if you're just trying to get like you know like Nikki just wants to get um her Adderall or whatever and they're like you're a ████ drug addict it's like you gotta say that like you gotta do all that well they're basically you gotta take a urine test to prove that you have it in your system and you're not selling it because that's what that's all they care about could uh I could fix your problem you got a guy um my college roommate owns a pharmacy in Vegas allegedly we don't want to do this on camera now do we oh well no it's fine
7:38 because because we because we're still getting all serious no it's fine Joe because what we do at home is we just we just actually crush it all up and we snort it yeah and I do have a big box of uh good stuff that people left over for me perfect like what's in the box you just went from being careful to just being completely on the same I'm possessing we're gonna go there what we're gonna do is we're gonna buy a plane right we have this box of drawers the good thing is those things are not illegal substances so I don't need to take it on I don't need to transfer it into a plane you don't need to sell a plane because they're not illegal all you do is put it into like liquid form you you make it wet and you start pasting it on the walls of the plane wallpaper in the plane and they're like
8:28 oh nice oh cool nice stuff I think the appraiser missing it and then you cover the whole plane with it it's all Sig narcotics theme I really like this striped wallpapers yep and when you land packaging tape Martha Stewart collection so you have to sell the plane that's good that's really good Joe uh everyone can you guys raise your hands does everyone raise your hands you too yeah uh put your hand down if you've never done cocaine if you've never done it yeah if you put your hands once you make him do it let me ask you you've done it you liar those crack count I don't know but you have something like that no because I was gonna ask like uh what's it like it's not the same no no
9:20 because it's not the same Coke is like another visual cue to see you Anthony can tell you what it's like without having to tell you he's done it all right put your hand your hands down if a male doctor's ever touch your dick put your hand down if he has yeah oh dude of course if he has to oh you guys are so good it's like you guys are wrong wait has he we wouldn't you want a real doctor working on it don't you I don't know I've had a woman doctor touch my penis and that was really embarrassing I liked it hahaha I liked it why why why yeah why'd you like it is it because she had to it's just kind of a gilf Michelle yeah no it was uh it was at a uh a military Hospital and she was touching all the guys she's a military doctor and I had to do my
10:11 annual checkup and she was all up in her uniform and ████ yeah so it felt like you know how like in GI Jane like all the dudes were discriminating against the girl I felt like all the girls were discriminating against me but I'm here to prove something and then she'd grab my my little nuts four figure saluting the whole time and I was here to prove something that you grabbed my little nuts oh she's checking you yeah and you're like did you hear the call of a bald eagle yeah did you get hard now I was really nervous my dick got shriveled up me too yeah I thought it was cool when I was a kid and I got measured by a female seamstress at Friar Tux you're like whoa whoa because you have to get really close to your inner thigh when they do it I need to find out your inseam yeah oh ████ and your waist and you're like put your arms up they do that they do
11:01 that for sure [Music]
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