0:00 [Music] welcome back to careful boys we we are indeed very careful boys i got a question for you guys here we go oh okay so here we go everyone here is in a relationship whether your boyfriend girlfriend married or an affair with a boyfriend boyfriend over there or mother father or that's popular so um what would you do if you were not with the person you're with right now you're ████ all the fans [Laughter] every single every single ████ one there's a lot of hot fans oh dude we got hot oh you're a fan cool let's ████ dude jk news dude i be looking at other
0:52 people's fans and i'm like oh like who's fans like who i'm not gonna say but a lot of youtube a lot of youtubers they're fans mr beast you're fans some of those fans are like a traffic accident waiting to happen but then at our meet and greets though i'm like we got the only fans i think he looks like he's been wanting to talk this whole time whether you're single or or or you could create your own hypothetical you could be in another relationship with this hypothetical creature oh sex with the fan the whole time mountain dude so much sex man mouth ass vagina never took you for a ████ anal guy not but just to try i'm not do it i just want to do it to a fan you're not a you are not that kind of man you're going to get so many dms slid in
1:42 don't play with fire my friend i don't even know how to check my dms dude you'll get it bro that's the real trick yeah because i tag him on ████ and then he's like how do i reshare this stuff and i'm like you know how to do instagram as much as i do we're good and we're social media stars yeah okay what about you anthony been dying to speak on something anthony came up with this idea off-camera i did and then he's like i presented like eight topics and then you're like oh they're all good and then joe's like no let's talk about this i can't ████ wait to leave her let's say you weren't with ninabeth pilipinos what have you never met her who would have never met her what would you be doing right now do you guys think you were okay so like first question do you guys think your relationship types meaning like you know in general at this point in life you think you'd be in a
2:32 relationship in a long-term relationship do i still have this random kid running around no that came that came as a product unexplained genetics he said still like tycho's random now he's a random kid i'm like my goodness like jesus mom ████ saint mary yeah where i just had a kid yeah i just ████ exactly who's been in the relationship longest maybe how many years oh wait no bart wait what up nick uh 12 years next 12 months nick's vincent's heist since when 2008. 2010. i feel like i've been in a relationship for like so ████ long because i basically went out of one into another so i've been like with like two chicks you've been like 13 years old that's why i don't think you are gonna crush fans at all thank you you have never been single since high school i know it was just a defensive that's why he would crush
3:23 people because like the second the second you've been in something for a long time and you get out of it is the second you go the opposite way for a period of time i think what he'll do is he'll find the first fan that he crushes and falls in love with her and then he'll stay with them nah dude my twitter bio would be i anal fans i think if if i was single with no random kid running around i probably would try to crush puss because i think my my well my body count is only i think like four or five oh jesus christ your body oh i look like i'm a ████ casanova no because like so i had my i lost my virginity when i was 15 right in high school and then i had another chick after that and then so three chicks you got your virginity back maybe like three chicks in high school or four chicks in high school and then i was super on track of just finding a relationship
4:14 so like you know when i was in college i wasn't really i dated around but it was so easy for me like i don't i'm not feeling any there was ████ being thrown at him and he went you don't have straight a's you ain't no ████ lie bro yeah cause i went from one site like another and then uh me and geo got together in 2008 and then so it's just been like a loop you'd be like people like hey girl let's go to the beach ████ all this school work ████ and he's at the beach and he's all like hey joe you know i got so turned off because she actually played into my trick and went to the beach with me yeah she got distracted and he's like that means she's not an ace that turned you off you played so many money i was weird man was maybe i don't know yeah but we would we would have study groups or whatever and check i'll be with the chick and then i'm like hey you wanna go to the beach yeah sure she's wearing like this hot bikini and ████ i'm like don't try to ████ trick me you're not a good student
5:04 and then uh i wouldn't end up not talking to them anymore this girl's like you wanna come to the pool party he goes sure and he goes to the pool party and then he was like where is the party it's just us too well might as well get in the jacuzzi and then they just get in there together you talk about school how old are you wow i don't know 23 24 25. i didn't realize that's when you were ucla though right yeah i didn't know i was like you were like i'm like where's all your friends at you said there's a pool party and then she was like oh they all couldn't make it she's lying to you bro and i'm like that's that's a red flag no no no that's the red guys your friends are very flaky you are the average of the people you hang out with and then barco's homemade goes so you think she likes me i actually don't like people who suck at planning events either so now because i'm what 30 all of your friends 38 this year and i only have like four or five then if you never met
5:55 geo you might have been continuously trying to crush or try to get married no i mean like like you had that yeah yeah it's like actually found yourself a little bit sooner and maybe start to crush a little bit because then you have like eight years of blue balls or something yeah cause when you look back on all the times that you were a ████ idiot and the chicks were trying to ████ you it's actually pretty wild how stupid guys are yeah cause like damn that chick was totally trying to ████ me i was like how did i not know that same chick i remember she brought my sweater right i'm like this one in the moment you're just so ████ dumb i remember she bought my sweater she was like sweatshirt we go on the balcony and she's like you know what's weird i remember like all the black guys at my school would give me attention because i was like one of the white chicks with the big booty i'm like oh i can't believe they would look at your butt like that i'm like it's just me and her in the room it's so ████ up you generally felt like though uh but you do have the sweater that you
6:45 borrowed right can i have my sweater back i'm like i'm just so ████ dumb that i just yes i've got my sweater back all right cool see you tomorrow and that's the classic move right ladies love it and i'll probably go home ████ horny and i'm like i guess i gotta jack off because no one wants to ████ me but that explains you in a nutshell like spurned by another white woman damn these white girls play harder get don't they they don't they'll never like an asian guy like me you know hollywood need to put more asians on the map dude come on come on come on for the sake of this hypothetical um don't try to butter it up dude just say it this i i wouldn't have ever said this
7:35 when i was younger but uh for the sake of the social understanding and the experience of it uh this sounds so weird to try and say but i feel like i would try and test online dating just because i feel like that's such a unique human experience that was so not not apparent for us not tender oh cause you're not part of the tinder generation yeah we never did it i never did it yeah we all skipped out we were my space generation though that's elite online dating and there was definitely a moment where it's kind of like man that's just so weird like the e-harmonies the tinder the coffee right yeah and then now it's like straight up like years later obviously the world has gone so digital and social and we all know probably now people who are happily married you know what i mean and when you think about it too it's like oh my god you guys met on online video that's so weird but it's like over here it's like where'd you guys meet the ████ club like it's not exactly like romantic either you know so i feel like for the
8:27 social understanding and like there must be something really cool about like kind of you know just kind of not beating around the bush and just being like you want something i want something let's see if it ████ works out if not i can swipe move to the next one and kind of go through that quick and also straight up on the whole crush push ████ there's so many yeah there's so many people that like use those platforms and meet people and the long-term relationship doesn't work but the short-term fun exists yeah you know what i'm saying you're a dirty dog anthony would be a tender swindler bro that's who he would turn out don't be don't be blowing that ████ up dude anthony's going on a fan f███-a-thon bro hundred percent oh this guy's ceo of his own company oh the noodles were his
9:17 i eat those two instagrams he's in charge of i get those at texas costco and hawaii 7-eleven kinderbang noodles is just getting a bunch of dms today's video is brought to you by upstar if you got multiple credit card balances and you're getting by just by paying the minimums and barely making a debt in your credit card debt it can be pretty dang discouraging upstart can help you pay off your existing debt quickly so you can finally feel like you're getting ahead whether you're paying off credit cards consolidating high interest debt or finding personal expenses over half a million people have used upstart to get one fixed monthly payment upstart knows you're more than just your credit score and is expanding access to affordable credit unlike other lenders upstart considers your income
10:08 and current employment find you a smarter rate for your loan with a five-minute rate check you could see your rate up front from loans of 1 000 to up to fifty thousand dollars and receive your funds as fast as one business day after accepting your loan find out how upstart can lower your monthly payments today by going to upstart.com off the record that's upstart.com off the record don't forget to use the url so they know that we sent you loan amounts will be determined by your credit income and certain other information provided on your loan application go to upstart.com off the record i think i think i would be in a relationship at my age right now you are in a relationship yeah yeah but i i think uh if maybe another one or whatever but i think i'd be in a steady relationship yeah that's it that's all you got well because i i got to do the crush push
11:00 stuff and i ████ i ████ so many fans oh yeah i know you're wrecking those fans dude you're getting a real hard time it was so good but why would you why would you be why would you not continue to the f███-a-thon why would you because they're breaking his back my balls hurt no i think there's a there's a there's a point where there's a point where you want more like there's a point where you want a companion than a hookup or like you want more out of the relationship he brought out this prompt so he could ████ look like the hero he does but is there is there a moment like honestly like actually when you're with a when you're with somebody and you're having that existential moment like maybe you're biting down on the sheet and you're like yeah god damn it man he's like i don't know like is there more one tear comes out of
11:50 his eye as he's biting the sheets when i'm when i'm hugging the pillow in my doggy style position yeah and and i'm getting my ass licked and i shiver and bite the pillow oh ████ do i go shimmer don't shiver and you go maybe someone else could lick it better than this yeah the curiosity got it is there more out of life you know or someone that could love you harder you know what you mean do you think your dad watches these videos yeah he's a huge fan yeah and he goes man if you i never beat your ass if you got your ass licked like that if i knew you're such a sexual maverick so by the way i don't remember beating your ass i think regardless if i'm in a relationship or not i always want to crush push yeah i think that's just a in inherent
12:41 guy ████ it's just hard not to desire it right for the sake of the camera i don't cosign to that but then when you like shut up that's why there's even two fingers there's one in the ass exactly you could have made a one little circular motion or you could have hit all five but you're like nah dude i think what prevents normal human beings from doing it is the guilt of hurting the person you like or love yeah yeah but it doesn't still prevent you from wanting to bone the ████ out of a lot of uh perspectives do you think the husband ever goes to his wife he's like hey look i didn't ████ her i fisted her and she's like oh okay that's it i was like oh that's less intimate does that ever happen before i just
13:32 worried about this no i've never participated in fisting i don't think i would i would uh enjoy your party i've never had a i've never had a uh interest in physically you'll see why that would be enjoyable for the woman i think my my fist is too small actually i have small hands i never had a desire to fist a woman but i did watch a porno where a girl ████ the bed post and it was the size of a fist oh wow and she was riding a bed like the the corner like a victorian bed yeah it was like one of those solid or more modern that's going to do it like a pride and prejudice it was one of the ones that had the ████ mosquito net excuse me beauty dude like ████ huge dude with the swirls and ████
14:23 hand crafted beauty and the beast left one of one an anne of green gables bedbugs basically and she rode that ████ and i was like god not anne of avonlea where they lost the budget yeah not that one that's where they lost the budget but it blows my mind cause i'm like what man watches this and goes ooh time to jack off yeah who's that for not me and how did you stumble upon it and watching it hey don't judge me okay i randomized you you said what man watch this you're the one watching it you're the one that likes ben post ████ well you put portal on shuffle you could do that it's on autoplay what is it oh what is that i never thought of that dude do you have a porn playlist yeah i do i have favorites but then don't you just go on the front page and go like hmm what am i feeling window shopping or don't you go on like the
15:13 what's hot like today's hottest trends you know like daily special yeah the daily special and then you see it kind of like oh what's this there's a maid and then you click and then you're like skipping through you know and then you're like hey i've never seen this before and she starts writing a bed post that's what happens a lot when i watch stuff like it happens a lot trust me i'm not i'm not talking i'm not clicking the title joe's like okay for example i picked a video this chick's on an island i'm like there's surely not going to be a bed post sure enough out of ████ nowhere she sits on the bed and she starts riding no bed frame no bed for miles no bed frame just a bad
16:04 frame post there's a best boat you explain that to me actually yeah all right i remember i saw a threesome right a threesome go down with a chicken and a couple of bed poses what about you guys what about you guys over there what do you think you would be if you guys weren't in a relationship right now i beat another relationship because i'm a ████ there we go there we go 100 i'm a ████ yeah cause like sometimes this question is very weird like for me friends why is it weird well like just for you though yeah well because you've been with one person since high school but i've also yeah high school was what's up would you still be in high school [Laughter]
17:03 think no i don't think i'd be crushing puss bro like i don't think i'm the guy bro i i don't think so no no no ████ no no you never thought like you've never been that guy huh i i did it okay so nick's not that horny well you're not horny let me touch you you'd be touching my dick so like don't be afraid to be honest but at the same time be afraid here no i'm being a hundred percent because i have to deserve when i i remember uh ethylene would go again after you there was a girl that i told the story about how like she kind of like dumped me or whatever yeah and then after i started like i stopped talking to her and i kind of really didn't like her at all because and i started being mean to her and then she started really liking me and then she was like you should come over blah blah and i went over to her house and then like i guess i think she wanted to have sex with me and like we started making out and then i just was like this don't feel right and i left why
17:54 because i just it didn't feel like your dick didn't get hard yeah bro i felt like i felt bad i felt like get hard really nah what what do you think was bad about it well because i i knew that i didn't really like her because it was your best friend's girlfriend at a time no no but like it was one of those things where i just couldn't like i felt dirty afterwards guilt will ████ with you it's because it was just physical and nothing like yeah like i just couldn't i was like what's the point i don't even like this chick like just have to like ████ through that though you're ████ yeah but i also at the time i was also a virgin too i was also a virgin so i also was kind of like i don't know and i just was like i don't know bro this is the same like it just didn't feel right so then i just left and i just never talked to her because you want your first time to be magical yeah i guess yeah no for sure but but at the
18:46 same time especially at the age but also too it's like i've been with my girl for so long even in my formative years you know like where i don't even know like my life might be completely different i don't think i maybe would have even started fighting at that still be a white belt huh yeah i don't even know like i don't even know how different my life was so she played such a giant role in who you are and what you've become today yeah we grew up to like we grew together as adults wow like in like you know i remember life before nicki really not really we're not supposed to bring the real people back into this prompt guys no but but in general like i'd be helicoptering fans you forced him to get like such a weird answer that we all get real everybody's such a ████ hero no no but in general though like in all reality yeah i probably would be in a relationship but like is that a fun
19:36 answer yeah no dude what if you guys asked me and i just went i'd be in a relationship and they just continued i said the same thing and it was pretty fun i think why is it important than what it actually is yeah no but i think i think i am a relationship kind of guy you know when you said you were going to helicopter fans were you the propeller so yeah so where's the pilot when you hit when you helicopter somebody you mouth a chick like this right oh she's on top she's on top okay um but then it's time to say but it's time to take off it's time to take off you tell her that too yeah yeah through the through the headset though so r kelly's ignition remix you say work here for takeoff and then you just start ████ rotating around your dick i thought you were the propeller so i thought you're getting on top and speaking like a ████ no but that's too much work for me we
20:26 established earlier though i have to go like this when i have sex that's true oh okay he's a real man thank you very much [Music] [Applause] [Music] you
// end of tape