0:00 If you can't jack yourself off, there is a mobile jack-off service from the government. >> No way. They're They're called the hand angels? >> Hand angels, that's right. >> What happened in history or in genetics to make Japanese people so horny out of the womb? >> No Christians. >> That's why? >> Okay, get his Get his um What is it called? As racist as you can your brain as you can. >> OH, MY FAVORITE TYPE OF HEAD. >> SPACE. Default mode. >> Space. I hate Japan. I hate Japan. >> I hate everybody, bro. >> Yeah, we know that. >> What skill do you think each Asian is naturally born with? >> Born with? >> Yeah, born with. >> Japanese is uh born with perversion, Koreans born with hatred, Chinese born with greed, uh Vietnamese born with risk,
0:52 >> [laughter] >> Risk? >> and gambling cuz gambling they love gambling. >> They love gambling? >> Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They're good It's a skill, yeah, yeah. >> [laughter] >> They're luck, luck, yeah, yeah, yeah. >> They love building skyscrapers on bamboos. >> Mm, nice. Stilt houses. >> Isn't that all of Asia? >> And then Filipinos? >> Filipinos dance. >> Okay, Taiwanese? >> Saving money. That's the That's their skill, yeah. >> And Cambodians? >> Cambodians being broke. Uh that's their skill, being broke. >> Indonesians? >> Uh being Muslim. >> Yeah, dude, I was going to say I was going to say player. Mongs? >> Growing opium. That's a good skill that they have. >> Mongs? >> Yeah, they're known to grow opium in the in the mountains. That's what they're born with. >> Damn. >> Thais they're really good at being transgender. That's their skill right there. >> Laotian? >> Laotian uh they're really good at pretending No, no. They're really good at hating
1:42 Thailand and blaming them for stealing everything. That's their skill, yeah. And then Burmese or Myanmar, they're really good at the military taking over the country all the time. >> Oh, like coups? >> Yeah, they're really good at coups. >> What about Mongolians? >> They're really ████ good at riding horses. >> Okay. World domination. What about people from Hong Kong? >> Hong Kong? They're really good at spitting on the floor. >> [snorts and laughter] >> Yeah. That's their skill. >> So they're just born with that naturally. Okay. >> That's the first place where I saw somebody shoot boogers out of their nose just walking down the street. Yeah, they go and then like all these ████ boogers come out and I was like, "Whoa, I've never seen that before." >> Hong Kong, huh? Ooh.
2:34 >> They just go ha ha and then like the boogers they go honk honk. Honk honk and it doesn't get on their face. It doesn't get on their clothes, nothing. I tried it and that ████ just fell all over my shirt. It was so bad. >> He tried it. He's like, "Do as the Hong Kong do." >> [laughter] >> I go ha and then it just went Yeah, it was so bad. >> Yeah, how do they point it outward like that? >> I have no idea. >> That's why they're born with that skill. >> [laughter] >> Japanese man tried doing it. He blows out his shirt. >> the Japanese one you said? >> Being horny, like perversion. There's they're really skilled at perversion. >> Yeah, they're really skilled. So you think every Japanese person regardless of what they do in life has an aptitude for being a pervert? >> Yeah, I think the average Japanese level of horny is like the most horniest Chinese.
3:24 >> OH. WAIT, why is that the scale? >> [laughter] >> The horniest guy in China is the average Japanese guy. >> Is the average Japanese. >> Wait, what's the stereotype of the horniest guy in China? [laughter] >> No, I think the horniest guy in China is also really horny. >> [laughter] >> I think that for sure. I don't know. >> But that's how horny he's saying Japanese people are by default. >> Okay, I'll give it to you, but I'll still the horniest [laughter] in China. >> What about What about the horniest American? What is the horniest white guy? What is that What is that >> I don't know. Oh, like white American? >> [laughter] >> They're horny, but they're they're kind of like vanilla compared to Japanese. >> What about like a P. Diddy horny? >> Huh? P. Diddy horny is like Oh, just criminally horny. >> [laughter] >> Okay, what about a Charlie Sheen horny?
4:15 >> Yeah, that's horny. That's some ████ horny ████ >> Is that Japanese horny though? Charlie Sheen's Japanese. >> If we were to Let's say we got some Japanese people together for a focus group and we're polling them each and we're asking them individually, "Hey, like how horny are you?" And some of them some of them are like, "Not at all." Are they lying straight up? >> Oh, 1,000%. But I I do think that the further you are from Japan, like let's say you become Japanese-American or Brazilian, um you lose the level of horny. >> So, there's like a beacon in Tokyo? >> Yeah. Oh, you know what it is? I don't think it's a matter of horniness. I think it's a matter of like >> uh comfortability and like what people have already been exposed to. So, you might look at that Japanese people like, "Are you like really horny?" They're like, "Oh, no, not really horny." And then you like put it like a red ball over their mouth and chain them and tie them up. And they're "Okay, yeah, no problem." >> [laughter]
5:05 >> You know? Like Hey, are you horny? Uh no, not really. >> [laughter] >> Why do you ask? Excuse me, sir, are you horny? No, not really. >> [laughter] >> Maybe Tuesday. >> Coming is just as important as breathing. >> Oh, that's like a sacred thought? >> They even have government-funded ████ services for disabled. >> Well, that's for disabled. >> There's a ████ nurse that comes over and you get a ████ government-paid happy ending. >> So, she'll come over to like a care home? >> A dude that's like let's say you're just disabled, you don't got hands. >> Tell me more about this program. >> [laughter] >> Where can I sign up for such program?
5:55 >> Whatever it is, whatever the reason, like you got amputated you or or you're just too dumb and you can't like use your hands or like you're kind of cool but like you're paralyzed or like but you can still feel your dick. If you can't jack yourself off, there is a mobile jack off service from the government. >> No way. >> Look it up. I ain't making it up. >> What does their retirement program look like >> [laughter] >> Think we're going to Japan, boys. >> What do the nurses look like? >> Like normal ladies. >> What's the name What's the Japanese name for the service? >> I don't know. Just type in Japanese hand job release service government funded for disabled. >> Sponsored by Jojo Takawa. >> That's how horny Japan is, dude. >> Is it the Oh, they're volunteers. >> Okay, that makes it weird. Woah.
6:47 >> Or >> makes it really cool. >> Heart of gold, man. >> Yeah. >> It's um It's It's They're They're called the hand angels. >> Hand angels, that's right. >> No way. >> Oh, wow. Yeah, it's for disabled people. Oh my god, you're right. But yeah, it's it's it's volunteers. So that means >> Well, it's nonprofit, right? So the government's >> So where do I sign up to volunteer, brother? >> That means they're probably just really horny, too. >> So the average perversion level must be very high. >> Dude, I watched a documentary. I was like, dude, the ladies are so ████ caring. >> You watched an entire documentary on this? >> Yeah, that's what it just popped up when I looked it up. So wait, what's the What happened in history or in genetics to make Japanese people so horny out of the womb? >> No Christians. >> That's why? >> I think so. >> No res- no repressed.
7:37 >> Cuz Christians suppressed sexual energy? >> I think Christians are so sexually repressed. That should make them more hornier. But I think Japanese, you're right, is that they're really good at being horny because they're not held back. That's like California and weed. They have the best weed cuz they're not held back. >> But isn't Japanese like horniness still taboo in a way? Like you can't be openly horny. Right? You got to still act like it's not you buying the vending machines. >> That's what I'm saying. I feel like it's not just like horny. >> I feel like it's not just like horny. I think it's like on Japanese TV they have like very things that we would consider very perverted or full on nudity. So when you're growing up with like that type of like or onsens just everybody being naked all the time. I don't think it's the exact same version horny. They they might be like watching or having sex and being like no no this is not a
8:28 horny. This is just we are this is afternoon tea. You know what I mean? Like it might be a different level that we consider horny or perverse. >> There's guys that watch ████ erotic magazine like reading stories and then like they have like those hentai books like right in the like just riding a bus and that fool is like sweating looking at ████ girls ████ on the book. I'll be looking over and my mom's dying and cuz she's like standing next to me, right? And then >> [laughter] >> I'm like 14 years old and I'm sitting next to this dude. This dude's like ████ going like this and his there's sweat beads dripping from his forehead and then he's watching some like comic hentai ████ with girls sucking a dick and he flips the page and then he ████ nuts in her mouth and ████ and I'm just like what the ████ And my mom's dying because this is
9:19 normal. Cuz at this time like she she gets it. >> Was he like a mega otaku or did he look like a salary man? What did he look like? >> Just a regular old guy. But it's But the thing is it's shameless. Like there's hella dudes in like you'll see this. It's not common but you'll see it like you'll do a double take like oh this ████ is looking at a ████ Like there'll be guys that just go to 7-Eleven, they'll get like a Playboy, right? And then they'll just be like >> Like a And you know how everyone there's like a distinguished gentleman? So, they sit like this, and then they're all proper and ████ and they ████ have good posture, and he's like looking at it like that, and then there's a ████ tit, and then there's a nude lady, and then they go to the next page, and you're [laughter] like This guy's shameless, DUDE. THERE'S ████ CHILDREN in this train. >> Like he's reading Esquire >> Esquire or something? >> Yeah, like Like that fool has a ████
10:09 tobacco pipe in his mouth, and he's just >> [laughter] >> So, then explain what you meant when you said Koreans are born with the skill of hatred. >> I think it's more revenge. >> Oh, what do you mean? Like they >> I think >> Like they want revenge [laughter] out of birth. >> I think Koreans are very good at revenge. >> They have vengeful blood. >> Their dramas are so good cuz it's always a payback story. >> But then how are they getting revenge on Japan? No, they're just They're not doing it. They're just born with the blood from that. So, they have it in their blood, even though they don't care to get revenge right now. >> Oh, so they don't act on it. They're just They just are irritable? >> They just have vengeance in their blood. >> So, they just need something to spike it. >> Vengeance from China, vengeance from Japan, vengeance from each other. Just everyday Korean vengeance is like, "I'll pay you back." >> So, it's born there, but they don't act on it. And then if something were to happen to them
10:59 They They awaken. >> Yep. The K-rage is explosive. >> Sharingan, dude, you know? >> So, what happened after Japan happened to them? >> America and Russia happened to them. >> To >> Korea. >> To Korea. Oh. But then where's the revenge? >> In their movies. >> That's the thing. Everybody who's born in Korea now, they didn't live during that time. So, they have it in their blood, but they don't have that same relationship with those countries or the people. That's like us being like really, really mad at the the South in the Civil War. I don't know, like with something that like didn't happen during our time, but we were maybe >> Yeah, but I'm mad about the slavery cuz I was born in America like that. >> Exactly. Exactly, right? So, it's like it's not our fault. It's not our It's not our lived experience. So, like but but it's in the DNA so you hold on to it and then it just takes something to push you over the edge. >> But they channel it in break dancing,
11:49 K-pop, movies. So, they use that revenge energy. >> Korean barbecue, yeah. >> Barbecue. >> Kalbi chim. >> And then they do a good job cuz they channel it in this like, "I'm getting YOU BACK, MOTHERFUCKER!" YOU KNOW? "I'M GOING TO SPREAD THE H-MART ALL OVER THE WORLD!" >> Netflix is all Korean now. >> Oh yeah, they also ended up owning Little Tokyo. >> "THIS IS LITTLE TOKYO BUT ALL THE OWNERS ARE KOREAN!" >> Looks like they won in the end, huh? They got their payback finally. >> I guess they did. >> So, they have that they use the revenge as energy to ████ crush it in life. >> Long game. >> Okay. >> So, they have the energy. >> And then you said Chinese is greed and Vietnamese is risk. >> Vietnamese all day. Gamble, gamble. >> So, to a normal Vietnamese person
12:40 innately it's not good enough just to have what you have. You always have to bet for more. >> It's not just gambling. It's gambling with everything. Not even just money. It's also like It's like, "Man, I never drink that much Hennessy before, man." "Oh, never before? Well, never again." You know? >> [laughter] >> Yeah. >> Okay, all right. >> Test me. That's that's That's why Anthony always says that because he's a Vietnamese side. He goes, "Test me." >> That makes sense. That's why you're always saying test me. Okay. Ooh, we better not test him then. >> Yeah. But then But then Chinese is different from Taiwanese, right? Cuz Chinese is like, "Ooh, let me make a more money." And then Taiwanese is, "Ooh, let me save a more money." So, it's like the difference. >> So, imagine a Taiwanese guy buying something discount from a Chinese guy. Both of them think they held one. >> Yeah.
13:30 Cuz Chinese made more money and then Taiwanese saved more.
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