0:00 [Music] so a husband has made a very great error oh no he got married [Laughter] it's worse what give away the house no did he give away his wife didn't sign a prune up just what's something that you i mean we all do you guys have family group texts we oh no yes and no yes but i avoid them yeah i'll never respond but i never opened up my line pretty much me too um yeah i have like three thousand missed on there but i keep my one family separate mine and i'm in that group text with jio's family because they're really cool yeah i kind of do that too it's interesting my my uh in-laws were pretty fun my in-laws are pretty sick my family's very cynical oh my god same
0:50 dude i don't want to hang around them so too much no so a husband a loving husband accidentally sends a completely naked photo of his wife to their entire family oh man did he did he kill himself afterwards contemplating suicide right now he's currently contemplating i would too i mean what position was she in that doesn't really matter it does matter all fours with her ████ spread open we hold her but i would be so proud if my my my daughter's husband sent me that one you would yeah i'd be like go get them tiger but that's but that could be your mom too if it's my mom i'll be like go get them tiger you think so yeah she's still ████ that ████ 78. killing it do your thing though the closest thing i ever did to that was um i texted geo's mom and i was like oh
1:42 no you're not gonna believe what happened she's like what and then uh we're at the gas station and tycho was peeing but his pants is all the way down so i took a picture of him peen in the urinal with his butt cheek clean up and i sent that to him so it's funny because it's a little it's like did you meet the senator how dare you send child porn to your mother i'm against that child porn is illegal in a lot of states yeah dude not in nevada not all of them that's why i sent it right before the state line perfect so it's okay so as you cross the state line so it's interstate commerce now the feds are after you so this poor son of a ████ says that um this is the most embarrassing moment of his entire life yeah i agree so it all took place in the delivery room right after birth right after they gave she was giving birth to her son that's better
2:33 like the context is at least like uh more wholesome rather than sexual or whatever yeah cause you could you could play it off you could play it off like oh my god i was so excited the my firstborn son is like coming out unfortunately their family's really into pregnant finishes oh well that's unfortunate oh wait she took it's a photo of her when she's she's who is he meaning to send that to you yeah oh my god who is he meaning to send that to uh he says that he he was just excited after it he wasn't meaning to send it at all oh he butt centered he was trying to send a family picture not that picture it was right next to that one yeah i was right next it was too fired up he needs to organize his albums and that's true and he sent it to his he sent the this is this part's confusing because it says the dad sent the photo to his mom who sent it to the whole family why did they do that
3:23 now there's two levels of wait that's not his fault it's kind of his fault could be his mom is just like look at this you know because she has epilepsy so she's she just didn't see what the ████ was going on because she fell asleep while she's out yeah yeah yeah look at this the whole family the pregnancy picture is also strobing man so it's one mess up and another mess up back to back it's a double mess up she the wife is handling it really well she thinks it was pretty funny actually what a great wife yeah and um but she um you know she can't seem to get him to come down from the from the ledge a little bit the suicide watch yeah because he's just so embarrassed about it and can't believe where he should be yeah i think that just depends on like the family though right like you know like there's like um families that are very comfortable with certain things whether one there's
4:15 already like text threads i remember ryan ryan was here talking about how like you know there's like that grandma who was shooting like tick tock videos at like his studio and stuff like that but then like her daughter was there and then her daughter's children were there like just watching the grandma and it looks like only fan ████ yeah yeah it didn't look like tick-tock ████ some families are just really comfortable like you know like steve and his sister like kind of like you make out very close it's just different very close but she got married and rude and everything i um i used to sort out my my ████ like photo album thingy like on my phone because that's what i was afraid of is like if i'm sending something right like what if my ████ mountain biking adventure jump is right next to a dick pic and i hit the wrong one and it sends and i'm like oh no i was hella scared of that right oh no no they know i've mountain bike jump on them
5:05 oh no oh no i meant the dick pig she knows that i'm a ████ i had this girl she was so excited now she sees me biking yeah i met the dick pic no and i had different uh albums for every single one right i had albums of the girls i had the dick i had everything right and then when i kept looking at it i just had to delete all my dick pictures because i started feeling gay what i get they're all your dick though yes they start looking at a different way because every time you open it there's a ████ dick because the album cover but if it's your dick it's not gay it's but i don't but it's still you got to look at a dick when you look at the tiles you see dicks yeah but if it's yours if it's yours you don't associate it with you though it's super gay it's perfection though nobody wants a photo album full of dicks especially if you're a guy dick's yeah
5:55 dick your dick looks right amazing and it's a it's a it's a lot of it it's different angles it looks different literally start your day off the way i see your phone all right yeah yeah dick's i swear to god i have never taken a picture of my dick in my entire life oh really it's a lot of fun you should do bottom you got to do the top you guys are only so many ways to take a picture never never done you got to do the angle from over here you're still in it but it's like huge yeah and then you're you're you're holding it like with the with the okay sign like that punch me okay you hold it with chopsticks yeah like you're eating hot cheetos it's a theme yeah it's a good theme with tiny chopsticks too you really
6:46 never ever took a photo of your dick why not what's wrong with you we have such amazing cameras aren't big enough yeah they got 0.5 0.5 wide angle if if the ████ legends are true and steve has a big ████ dick right i i would literally take a picture of my dick next to my arm like this and just why would you do that so i could choke perfect ratio to see what are you the bone collector putting a dollar next to a footprint dude this guy's later putting a water bottle messages for scale yeah scale look at how tiny it is compared to this water i would need to put my my dick next to a bigfoot's ████ footprint the empire state building guys i can confirm steve's penis is huge guys what does it feel like in your hand right now it wasn't in my hands anyways um you're not supposed to tell
7:37 that story hey real talk though real seriously do you have a single photo of your dick in your phone right now i delete it all ah good job dude you wanted to see it yeah man i have my wife bent over in every ████ position you could ever imagine that's like what all that's in my is in my phone basically you have no no pictures of your dick poker chips everywhere just ████ dude cash money i actually do have a photo i'm gonna show you guys that no yeah no nicki holding racks yeah dude that ████ was sick just topless or what no just unfortunately cause we were on the way to the airport but corner cam am i right but yeah so uh that was a pretty fun moment taking taking money out like ████ 116 000 or whatever and just taking a stupid picture with it and she's like sticking her tongue out and like doing all stupid ████ because we're laughing
8:27 about it but she got picked was it scary going home with that cash yeah it's ████ frightening you're just like walking to your car like can we get an escort or something they they do give an escort right or how does that work nah i just well i was there so i was we just shoved it into a bag and walked out but i felt like a heist movie but what if someone followed you that's how they always get you yeah i know yeah but guess what eyes and back of my ████ head and jewelry ████ taekwondo karate dude taekwondo purple belt ████ what are you gonna do about it i'll literally i need music but i have forms dude you better play the music though ████ remember i remember all of it yeah you don't want to ████ with me you got a punch like this literally like that yeah yeah that's good rotation
9:17 i'm telling you dude low-key pretty funny himself came to my own dojo and he would wear a gold ghee sparkly gold like trump gold nice and then he would make us all sit there and watch him do a hundred push-ups before we started so it'll take like ████ 35 minutes it took a long time oh dude this guy's like 87 years old then i was like six years old you think you could kick his ████ ass now i can kick his ████ lily ass dude i went and peed on his grave dying yeah i was like you're a little ████ can't believe you died yeah yeah are you are you a black belt you dying so easy you die so so hard died of natural causes my god [Music]
10:13 you
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