0:00 thank you [Music] welcome back to careful boys everyone today we have Jason Cheney with us oh wow thank you guys so much for having me has anybody ever cheer for you like that that's cool thank you thank you thank you I'm gonna go to your stand-up show I'm gonna be in the back with a sword yeah oh no I was nervous would that improve your set and your performance knowing he was there doing that I don't think that does a jelly almost like heckling but it's on your side yeah let's talk about something interesting all right do you guys have any fears that you also know are irrational fears
0:51 oh oh man dude you got the heavy ones being afraid of birds irrational huh is being afraid of birds irrational or pretty rational I mean are you just generally afraid of birds for no reason uh not Birds specifically but dead birds oh it's like an omen like Ravens especially dead Ravens or like a dead bird that you shouldn't be seeing like that you know like what a bald eagle like a parakeet or like a pair a parrot can constantly resident dead bald eagle no yeah like our like a bird that you don't normally you know those little birds that that cats eat like sparrows and stuff like that's normal to see but if it's like a like a nice dove that's dead you mean like a yellow canary because there's like stuff you're running into nicer dog
1:42 no no like no I'm just saying as an example like if a bird you don't normally see in the wild is just dead right in front of you like a peacock yeah peacocks are annoying dude I don't know it just there's a weird feeling well that's great that is true it's a weird feeling because I don't know why I'm afraid of it it's already dead it's not gonna hurt me but why am I afraid of it yeah that's exactly you don't want to touch it I don't want to go near it well you don't want to touch it anyway you're just afraid of it yeah I'm literally just like I feel fear like hanging over me when I see one interesting and I'm like why am I afraid of it it's irrational is it like is it like a goo like a ghosty thing no I don't think so it's more it's just a feeling okay it's just an undeniable feeling it might stem from this thing that happened to me when I was a kid so uh my parents or my mom she bought these two parakeets and uh
2:33 she put them in mine in my brother's room when we were little because we shared a room and then one day I was just watching them I think I was like maybe like four or five maybe six I don't know and one of them just like kind of fell over oh and I was like oh no one of them died for for some reason I didn't see it die and then I was like oh that sucks there's only one left and then one day I was just watching that bird and it just chirped it went and then it just fell and I saw that I was like oh wow uh mom the bird died so she just maybe you have to not demonic powers in the first bite yeah no I saw it just like no it was the weirdest thing because I've never seen any anything just pass away like that before and I was just like oh ████ like this bird just died
3:24 you know what when I was a kid I saw a bird die and convulse in front of me I remember feeling so sad like I cried it's scary dude because it's like why is this just flopping around and like yeah you know and now when I see dead birds like on the street or like hurt birds like flapping around it just makes me feel icky because isn't that Omen though isn't it like a signify something I guess I don't know I thought you would know this dude well I know I know it's my spiritual guide bro you know everything experience I always hear stories about people and Ravens like especially um like when somebody sees a raven like they don't normally see him right and it could just be coincidence but like when someone sees a raven something bad happens to them that day Raven in the in the the black bird like a black crow yeah similar they're very simple same family I think they look almost like dead one of them is Bruce Lee's kid
4:14 um yeah Brandon Brandon Scott Lee about those birds like when people see them them they always notice like something bad happening to them that day it's I always hear stories about that too like a black cat yeah but black has less common but I always hear about it it's only for white ladies the black cat yeah like some things are Omens for that group yeah yeah yeah yeah the number four for Asians you know for Asians oh that's interesting what's a bad Omen for Asians you guys have irrational fears that are the number based on numerical things or number four do you have any three um based on numbers or anything do you have any rational views that you're like I feel like most of my fears are irrational but I feel like I'm afraid of everything I'm afraid of a lot of things you should get the tattoo that matches with Bart I fear everyone and everything I do fear
5:05 everyone to a certain degree um oh cheers I do get scared I'm very jumpy uh but as far as like come back to me I'm gonna think I'm gonna think of something good I'm gonna have something so good I was obsessively afraid of um so around third or fourth grade uh me and my friends did Bloody Mary in the mirror why are you messing around with that bro and then at that moment I mean you know we we grew up super religious right yeah so I grew up thinking demon Spirits all those things really ████ exist right so at that age I was like well she didn't come out but she could come out at any moment now and I just kept thinking none of the doors open dude now it's not just a bathroom like that s███'s gonna show up in the middle of the night that's when my insomnia started that's when I had to like beg
5:55 people to watch me take a ████ what what because I'm like if I'm in the bathroom they're good that ████ is gonna ████ crawl out of the the mirror so I was in the bathroom and I remember I had like my cousin by the door like ████ waiting for me like that like like I had like um like uh people by the door just like like holding guard and I'm like are you still out there it's like yeah I'm here like wow and then like I would have like people that I'm like I gotta go to the bathroom but I'm too ████ scared you know and I stopped taking showers because I was so afraid of the bathroom and this continued probably up until sixth grade oh until I couldn't take it anymore a lot of time yeah I mean like insomnia like all this stuff started happening because I just I was too afraid to go to sleep at night so I would be listening to ████ KISS FM
6:46 trying to listen to pop songs all that and I would like listen to uh Dr Drew ████ you know like what do you call it um yeah like they uh and I would just listen to radio all ████ night and not go to sleep and then I'll go to school the next day because I was afraid to sleep and I was afraid to like I was just obsessed I was like that too I think Asian parents when they believe all that ████ yeah it really influenced you so then when I got um the internet and when I started to get this ████ I was like you know what I all this Spirit ████ is like scaring the ████ out of me I need to learn like so I think it was in sixth or seventh grade I just started researching witchcraft occult Spirits ghosts I just went ████ deep that's the way to do it so I was like it scared me even more to
7:37 learn about demons and everything but after a while for some reason it made me control the situation better so now every time I became afraid of something I would just Deep dive research see how to take advantage win it whatever and then so now I think I don't have any more um things that are irrational fears because then I go so deep into it that that becomes normal and it's no longer scary I think the fear came from just not knowing because once you gain the knowledge and the knowledge is power right you started to see things from different actives and that took away the fear or exposure therapy oh yeah yeah I think that's what it was yeah doing that really young and I didn't know like like what and then like in like online chat rooms with wiccans
8:27 and that dude witchcraft people that could see ghosts imagine ████ seventh grade Joe just chatting on AOL with ████ witches and ████ like and I'm like when can you see can you put a good spell on me or like can I you know like and then like you just Deep dive into that whole realm and then after a while you just fatigue you fatigue from all the spirit ████ yeah you don't look like you've been exposed to any wiccans magic and then after a while you just realized it's all ████ ████ yeah yeah yeah yeah it's like but they're made up so I'm a warlock dog yeah they made up so many things like like Whispering at night my grandma and mom said you can't whisper at night or else the ghost is Gonna Come for real or like
9:17 cutting the fingernails using a knife at night using a knife oh wow I would always say that to me cutting your hair yeah what happened to go use a knife at night I don't know but there's ████ like blow drying your hair at night you can only blow dry your hair during the morning just all these weird now you gotta let it ████ dry I know a lot of those are made to help discipline kids but then I think over time it just stops making sense no I was like 25 yeah you know what my mom used to do there was this little like it was like this weird little doll that you would keep that we were all afraid of oh what and it would she would put it at the top of a cupboard I don't know why she did this now I'm thinking about it I was like it's kind of ████ up with you guys but like I was so afraid of opening the cupboard at night that I would just like walk in the kitchen and it was it was a cupboard full of Cups but then the doll was sitting up there and I don't know if she did it on purpose or she just so you don't ████ with her nice China but not
10:08 even that it was just like regular cups like so like if you wanted a glass of water I'd always be like I grab it and I close it and then I try not to look so no more great yeah dude it's true no but it was just like little things like that I just was afraid of like ghostly ████ like that ghostly ████ you know what I mean that's how I felt about uh in my parents house it's still there there's this floor lamp that's just in the middle of the living room it's just a normal lamp uh it's about like four and a half feet tall it just has a regular lampshade as a kid growing up I was terrified of it for no reason because it would look like something no I don't even know why I would just be like I just feel like it's ████ looking at me oh this is a normal lab so I would always like at night when I had to go get water I'd always take the farthest route yeah yeah and then even to this day when I visit my parents house I'm like oh ████ he's
11:00 still there man you ever thought about throwing that ████ away I knew it was irrational from day one I knew from yeah you need exposure therapy I'm age five that I'm like I'm afraid of this for no ████ reason it's kind of funny to me you know but then to this day it's like it still has a lingering weird take a picture of that lamp just take the lampshade off and put it on yourself and be like yeah it's a very normal I think you should trust your instincts bro trust me you're saying dark about that lamp show that lamp a bunch of YouTube videos of lamps getting destroyed dude exposure therapy against the lamps just send a message send a message there's a little message it might help I don't know I mean that's as irrational as you can get and then there's just some irrational fears like when you're afraid of certain possibilities or outcomes oh yeah far from happening yeah but is that
11:50 really irrational though because like I had that I have that with people that I'm like oh my God you're just gonna ████ drown because you suck at swimming so much or like you ████ you can't I you cannot run so I you're you're like I know for a fact you can't run and if we all get chased right now oh I think about that too like you're gonna be left behind because your ass is ████ fat and you're not running like not about the fat part but like the conditioning part what are we talking about no like I I sometimes have random thoughts like that where we're like I'm just like if if right now a warlord comes and bucking points guns at us yeah you're not going to survive in this group and you're going to ████ pull us down yeah I I think like that but I'm like but I might be in
12:41 Waikiki at the beach and there's no way shaping for there's no ████ Commando coming after us right now there's no point but I'm looking at my friend like you're gonna get us killed or we're like be something in you that's so like innately human that you start to rape things that way man yeah like we're swimming and then and then I'm just like one guy doesn't know how to swim or whatever I'm all like you're gonna drown bro like we need to save your ass and you're gonna kill us because you're an anchor do you do stuff where you're like what if we have to swim across that Island you wouldn't make it yeah yeah dead weight yeah do you do that yeah I do that yeah you know what's irrational about that for me it's like uh I I you know I'm pretty pacifist I've never really been in like a fight or crazy altercation or anything get them Nick dare you I'm in the same boat I'm gonna pull guard dude I'm in the same boat I'm a pacifist but the thing is you know when you like I think we talked about on
13:31 here before you know when you have those dreams and then you're like no matter what in your dreams when you're trying to fight or run away you can't run fast yeah yeah we can't fight and we explained that scientific I had to read this because I was always so what the ████ right pissed off at myself for being such a loser in my dreams yeah and I read it it's like because you're you're minding your body are literally not connected when you're in REM sleep you have deactivated your ability to move for rest but then if your mind happens to be conscious of that then there's this disconnect in your dream where you're wanting to move but you can't so it literally connects to that feeling right like sleep around because my only uh experience of myself in those altercations is an inability to move fast or win I assume in like regular life those things can happen because the only possibility I've ever played out in my mind was those things because you when
14:21 you dream it feels real yeah imagining it is different right like daydreaming about like me like also being able to pull out Bazookas and whoop everybody like I can do that with my imagination but the feeling that I've given myself through dreams has is it feels real so that's an irrational thing for me because I'm like wait that you have dream PTSD a little bit I know people like that like like I know someone who um can't drive doesn't have a license because uh when they were um what do you call it not astral projecting um sleep dream like sleep controlling like lucid dreaming lucid dreaming yeah lucid dreaming um they did that for fun and they got into an accident killed two people all this stuff so then because of that they have this PTSD from the dream and
15:12 they can't they freeze behind the wheel it's like um it's like an automatic physical thing oh that's weird like they enjoy driving or like they could play the game but then they can't actually drive and pass the test they ████ up all this stuff yeah oh wow that's when immersion therapy might help maybe make them drive a bunch of cars oh yeah that would be my to be honest that's my way of helping people is pushing them there to almost a brink of death but then because that's probably the only way to solve it not a good idea yeah dude I took one of my buddies out to go swimming um at the beach right and he's like oh I don't know how to swim and I'm like nah don't worry I got a life vest and he goes I never been inside the beach water and I'm like just put that on and the whole time he's trying to like say no and then like we're all going into the
16:02 water right so I throw him in there and I was like you gotta go straight and he doesn't know how to paddle or nothing so I'm grabbing him by his um uh life mask like this like I'm grabbing him like that to keep him straight right and he floats like this and his leg is like going this way and he's like he's just petrified like that I'm all like get your body down he goes how do you move in here you're talking about David no no no no and I I had to hold him and push his waist down so he's straight and then he starts going forward and then all this water is like going in his mouth and ████ and I had to put him I had to sit there and keep his body straight like a baby and then I was like move your legs and he goes how oh my God and the whole time we're cracking the ████ up and all this water splashing his mouth and he's
16:52 ████ drinking and he goes this is so beautiful and fun well then afterwards like I was just like all right here take this ████ floaty and I'm like five minutes your anxiety is gonna go away eventually like you'll be okay and then he calmed down and then I was like he goes I would have never done that by myself and I'm like yeah I know but you're like in good hands we can all swim Ming yeah I guess the best way to learn though it is yeah I try to try to do that with uh like um last weekend went bungee jumping for the first time did you really yeah and the cool thing is that uh so they they give you the option like you you can either go backwards where you just look at the bridge when you jump off or you can just look forward and just dive and I was like dude I want to go forward and it's so like um like me and my friend were like yo let's really try to max out on the feeling of like staring straight at the
17:44 ground as you're going oh my God and just try to really get that glimpse of actual dying wow you just let go so like I just go boom and then literally I was just like all right this is like no chord like what happened how did it feel you really do get that like something in your body's natural order kicks in of like why are we doing this and you know obviously you just shouldn't hesitate because you just should jump when the guy says jump and then you will feel that exact thing of like no we've made a mistake body why did you do the opposite of what we need to survive and you really as you're looking at the ████ Creek at the bottom and you're just full speed going it's like time gets really weird because
18:34 you start to go through these like motions of like it starts to feel like it stops and then you don't know the you can't make sense of why you did this interest it's ████ weird yeah if you do it that way it's probably just adrenaline rush and it just makes your brain and the adrenaline and just a whole like a lot like if you're a logical thinker that's why it ████ with you because I like I'm super logical and then me doing that was like the ████ is the logic in this so it's a really nice yeah it's a ████ so if you embrace the fact that you know but then that's because like growing up I've always I've had so many rational fears that over time I've tried to eliminate them all and uh so you have exposure therapy too yeah I love doing that because I think that is how you deal with for me personally I don't want to have a weak mentality so when I notice that I'm afraid of something I go okay is it irrational is irrational okay if it's
19:24 irrational then either I stop now or I prove that it's okay yeah and then for me like I just don't want to get in the habit of being like no I'm scared of that so I don't want to do it like because a lot of the time there's nothing to be afraid of no I think everything is you're capable of unlearning and learning like it's just repetition yeah so there's no like identity type I think that's the thing is people want to identify themselves with certain labels right like oh I am afraid of ladders or whatever right so I don't do it or like oh I had this one thing that happened to me as a child so then it's hard or whatever like yeah there there's a story that makes sense but you can also work toward rewriting a new story or like changing how you feel about it some of it is unnecessary so you don't need to do the work but certain things like I'm glad that I did
20:14 that for Spirits because if I was always afraid and I didn't overcome it then I would probably be defined by that and then like it would it would ruin me and I'd be too afraid to take a ████ shower yeah you know I think some people really do Relish in those weird things like it like I've met people that have strange fears of like uh I don't want to see somebody chewing food I get ████ freaked out and it's like you did yeah and but it's like that's your choice to live afraid of something like that like but it's very low but it's like okay uh I like that you said choice because you do have a choice to try to overcome your fear too because I think the motivation for that is to obtain freedom in some sort because the fear limits you from deciding on certain things because you're like I'm too afraid to do that but then once you remove the fear you
21:04 could pretty much do whatever exactly yeah see Nina she's very afraid of vomit and you know she relates it to when she was growing up she had like an uncle constantly like drinking stuff and like throw up so she would always associate that sound it was something that would like trigger right so the ironic thing is like you know like in our relationship when I would get like ████ drunk or hungover or something like that and I would just have those episodes it would be one of those things where it's like she just wouldn't even care to take care of me it's like he's on his own yeah he can't deal with the Sight and Sound yeah the ironic thing is also like she's working like in Pediatrics with kids all day you know what I mean and like nice nice dude yeah high five but you know what I mean there's also just that like I want to give her exposure therapy so that she could take care of me when I'm hungry no because in the future run into it you know what I mean you're always going to run into
21:54 that very Human Experience like Dad reflex or whatever um so that's why I'm literally just gonna throw up on her if you need help I'm gonna do it man we should all do it throw up near her because we need to help encourage her anytime you guys see her next time foreign
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