0:00 [Music] welcome to hot seat we're with the show with the hottest seat on all of youtube i gotta practice dude today's sacrifice to the hot seat gods is gilbert gallon another i guess we're the hottie gods i will start off with a slightly cooler question people see you on tiger belly how did you meet bobby and how did you end up being on that show i met bobby through kalila so i met kalila at a coffee uh was it coffee bean did you mean a tea leaf yes i read his biography before he came out it's in my wikipedia where i met her we talked about mma she's filipino our
0:50 mutual friend said hey gilbert does tech stuff which i don't i just do self tapes for an actor she thought i did audio she's like hey can you come help me do this podcast with my boyfriend like i'll help you push star that's all i know how to do and she's like hey cool he's bobby lee i was like okay what the ████ and then we started how did you make it i thought you guys were siblings when i first i honestly thought too like siblings were cousins a lot of people were cousins but how did you meet kalila uh at the coffee shop no like you just randomly you're just talking no our friends was like hey me like she was with her friend jenna you know jenna have you oh yeah jenna came here oh yeah jenna was like we were friends from chicago she goes hey i'm having to talk to my friend i want you to meet her and we started talking about mma and then she's like i also have a podcast can you help me get it going and then i had to learn everything on youtube what was your first day like working with him so he's the tech guy that never did tech before they called me audio engineer because they had a i think they had a white guy prior to that and what would
1:42 so they're racist they kicked out the white guy and they wanted a filipino what are the reasons take the shoes off he didn't take what they didn't say he didn't take his shoes off he didn't take his shoes off so he got fired and he also also he charged like he also charged like five thousand dollars and i was free oh okay maybe that's the difference that's probably yeah who's ████ winning now huh i take my shoes off slightly warmer question what's the weirdest ████ you've ever seen bobby lee do uh not weird anymore because i've learned how to navigate it now but i was very shocked when he put his penis on my elbow uh and then he goes like first met him but now off camera wasn't out was it out what's that when's the first time you saw his dick probably within the first two weeks when's the last time he saw his dick yesterday last two weeks two three weeks three weeks but now the thing is he tries to make people uncomfortable then you go for grabbing and he freaks out gonna stop so if you make it uncomfortable for him he's stuck also if you like giving him a hand job he's like no this isn't what i really wanted he's like dude this is
2:33 weird stop yeah well he's like yes most embarrassing thing you ever done uh i pooed my pants in second grade miss bender's class outside but there was a there's a bunch of dogs that day was one of those like a bunch of dogs are here all the kids can play with them so i faked it and said oh i slept in dog poo i'm like oh that sucks gilbert go clean it off i went to the bathroom pretended i was wiping off my shoe but i still smell like ████ so people started realizing oh you should've spammed but i kept going ████ i can't get this off my screen what the hell's going on improv that's it there's dookie all over your pants but the smell of the shoe is coming from your crotch i know but people weren't smoking my crotch but i had to explain like god i can't get it all anyone else smelling ████ god it smells like human ████ it smells like human ████ though i kept doubling down so i kept i would like just throughout the class i'd be like the best man i'm so sorry i can't believe it's like why did we play today
3:24 with the dog bringing it up all the time nobody's saying anything and this ████ second grader's like hey guys sorry guys i can't get the ████ oh good lord it smells like ████ [Laughter] who is that bro did you start blaming people around you rachel you ████ ████ yourself i didn't do second city yet because i wasn't saying great i i did not yes and it was just the one thing the dogs guys the dog you're so happy dude come on i know right you didn't know how to ████ escalate them like the dogs dripping drippity cheese build this classroom on a toilet cemetery good lord we're dudes you just get this look to like the end of the day people are like it was you did you ever have any crushes on your teachers uh
4:14 yeah that one describe your hottest teacher miss verhoeven first grade and that's very good that's all mistakes era dude the finest titties in the class last time you jacked off into what porn video uh uh it's called sometimes it's branded as prg taxi or czech taxiport oh i like that guy is this some stevie wiebe what is this is that tucked up patrol part two do you taxi porn people watch taxi porn taxi porn it's is that a bing bus check no no it's check that out there was once i was watching a porn this was weird and i was like is that vitality from youtube it was he did that first you know that before youtube he did that first guy yeah hey see what are we doing here david you said this is your favorite video no i've never seen anyone pick the one pick the one that you are are you pretty
5:04 horny now oh that's no that's fake wait you said use a taxi video no but that when it's something called fake rub it's it gets i'm out of it oh yeah there's too much branding in the car let's stay authentic to what he watches and just find the right video okay which one is it it's called check taxi for i said check oh i know i think it's checked by czech republic yeah not check it with a ch only likes eastern european ch or cz where are we at cg right like czech republic yeah yeah yeah it's a beaut prague is beautiful dude i heard they got a lot of sex trafficking there they do you know you know in prague you know i'm probably the czech republic their legal age for people to have sex is 14. wow how do you know that because 14 year old girls when me and my son went to go teach there like literally 14 or 15 year old girls started to like be really weird with us at the bar and we're like no this is weird why are they at the bar you're allowed at the bar too not 21.
5:54 drinking age 14. i did see hella young people though when i was at the clubs there and they were literally like it's okay at age they were maybe like 16 or 17 and we're like no this is weird they're like no it's okay at 14 here we're like it's not okay here she's like i've been ████ it's not okay in my mind yeah they've been ████ for a long time yeah i mean this guy gilbert hey gilbert what's what's the most recent point that what's the most uh the most recent rim 4k ram 4k three fingers of the guy's butt we're in 4k oh i don't like the butt penetration that's not for me that's not for this i like rim 4k isn't that around but i don't like the boots so the most recent point you've seen is a guy getting rim job and getting fingered his butt whoa dude that's when i click off kind of ████ up for you to watch this is a stretch nick has made me do before training oh yeah it's for your hips what's the weird hip flexors what's the weirdest place
6:45 you jacked off at uh in the car lax picking up a friend while you're picking him up or just before just before is the friend of chicker dude we don't know were you parked were you parked i said we don't know why assuming things i don't know where you parked the park around from like all the turbos going that'd be a nightmare that's truly a nightmare if you ever driven through lax you know that's a ████ the sickest part was passing tom bradley tom brown where did you not where did you not uh i think it was a yellow no no it wasn't a terminal hawaiian air on the side next to the yellow no not even at the airport like the park and go the yellow and black one oh parking goes a good place to nut park and go yeah
7:36 parking go i paid to go in we're now it's the uber place right yeah hey hey room 4k answer the question taste position when they got in the car were they asking you why you're so out of breath or while i was like it smells like bleaching i was out of breath it might just smell like bleach wait what did you come in the day did you come in a cup play lava yeah did you come in yeah what did you do come in a cup like where did you come on the seat though how do you come on a seat belt is this a rental i didn't plan for it guys i just doing the you know doing the thing and it landed perfectly on the diagonal and what did you smear it into the seat belt no i took the seatbelt off i went to in and out right there before i got a napkin i know that in and out let's edit it out ████ that dude we're for sure i'm gonna podcast not jk news which is more reputable you're in the hospital you're also hot
8:28 what inspired you to get horny or whatever did it inspire you yeah can i tell you what what do you think i was watching porn no but what kind of this one they're like okay wait wait wait wait wait no context we need contacts you you ████ came in you came you're parked at the l at the park and go right and you're bored just watching it park and go i mean i get it i was just i think i had watched it like the week and you're just like oh i gotta watch that ████ again this was like one of those like friendly like i'll pick you up at 2 am so i'm like so you had you had a spank bank in your head so people listen to joe rogan when they're waiting for the people in the world when they jerk off no when they're picking up people in the airport in the car i get it well so but i didn't know it was 2am that's a different story now because i was going to ask you next what if people see you ████ beating away it's like i want to get there early i
9:18 wanted to rest and i was like yo i got that nut too yeah get it out did you have a napkin ready to go or you just ████ no you went out oh it's in and out no no but how like with a boner tucked into my skinny jeans it's good and i had to balance the seat belt so it wouldn't drip off the boner didn't go away drippity drippity drippity ████ oh ████ today's video is brought to you by babel the number one selling language learning app it is pretty amazing because me myself i want to be a polygon and i'm starting my journey with a babble learning language is really hard i remember taking spanish in high school and you always learn the words that don't really matter like a building or you learn like park bench and you're like what am i ever going to use these words what i like about babel since it's
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10:58 the price of three go to babel.com that's b-a-b-b-e-l.com and use the promo code off the record to get the special deal that's babel.com b-a-b-b-e-l-dot-com with the promo code off the record punchline we've now hit the 10-minute mark this is part of the hot seat where we like to get real personal really first okay oh wait real quick though but uh do you have a question i do oh go ahead who broke your heart and how did they do it ████ uh let us get serious folk band camp was one of them you wait you went to real band camp i thought that was an american pie legend let me start how sad this is so i was like 230 pounds in high school i was a sophomore and then i didn't have a lot of friends but at band camp i remember uh i became way too comfortable letting people call me fat and laugh about it and so all these guys started like making a thing where they started doing sketches at the talent show about
11:49 gilbert being fat oh my god and they did a whole sketch about you stuff like that or like and like the cafeteria i'd sit with them like they're my friends and they always call my mom at triplexfatty.com hey guys i'm laughing oh my god like where's your mom's face holy ████ i came out of nowhere no but they used to sue because i was like can you look that up uh triplexmaddy.com check out rim 4k that's a good time to be honest suddenly i really suddenly i relate to you on the human level way more you would always be like did we be and then you were fat too yeah it was like oh expanding.com is out where your mom's now you and your fat mom hang out i'll be like high five like i'm a member and this is the first time i was like i think i actually was sad about it i remember like skipping the like the planned activities to go to my dorm so i remember just sitting in the bed crying but i didn't want people to hear me so i locked the door and i played
12:39 sean paul's what's that album that came out uh they caught me button naked you're just crying your ass off to give me the light just give me the light think about that playing lock the door i kept going like wow so fat triple looks fabulous it's a movie scene dude but wait that is that what made you go i'ma lose this ████ we're starting this was junior year again who broke your heart though where's that chicken boy i was just saying because it's also happened at bandcamp so that happened yeah and the girl shout out to elena steiner ████ you up first and last name let's go what's her instagram sorry not that's steiner is a great human being uh san antonio this is jake i had talked with her i became the bff on the phones
13:29 like leading up to bandcamp every night calling her friend-zoned thinking i was like making headway yeah and i kept trying like i like this girl i was here i'm gonna i'm gonna see this chatting as girlfriends dude i'm gonna see this girl at band camp oh i'm gonna like do this thing to her she's like oh my god i can't wait let me know i'm like it's gonna hurt she's gonna love it then i get to band bandcamp we're at the dance and the whole thing i kept telling was like i'm gonna like oh you're gonna see me talk to the girl at the dance and i'm gonna kiss her and i also brought a confetti thingy to shoot you oh wait wait after you kissed her my god who's gonna do it that'd kiss her i was that i was that feels boy that loved watching all the rom-coms i was like this might just how you do it you were unhorny i i was no i was very horny he was really good he jacks off at the airport let's not make that a thing terminal two we know like one time
14:25 i went to go see her i was like the last i was such a push i was okay like i kept saying it's gonna be this day it's gonna be this slow dance it's like ████ it was the last one did you start shivering and ████ i was a little nervous what song was it what song does it give us the energy it goes just give it up but like a very slow voice just give me you think that your ancestors would just ████ murder you if they heard the skin or maybe they're inspired i feel like my grandfather would just ████ strangle me filipinos are like you could have done better you've done more yeah you could have done more than you walked up to her you kissed her i was like hey it's the last dance and i was like i think i don't remember i'm like traumatized you just shoot the confetti in her face and ████ her ████ the whole time she's like hey are you gonna go say what's up to this girl i think i made eye contact i was like hates the last dance i like brought her
15:15 over and you were still 230 pounds at this point really fast also just had people call me triplex fatty for the past two days.com i cried keep my i cried to sean paul just give it a like and then uh yeah and she's like who's the girl i'm like you and i just had a dance with her like this is the dance oh no i know and what was she like and then she was like oh let's dance and then she's like um we like get it do you get it she's like dude you're like my home girl like what the ████ and then i just shot the confetti what and then she's like what are you doing and i was like and she's like um let's just walk back i think it's done and that was it you shot the confetti and she said what are you doing yeah and then uh that's ████ rude bro hey thank you for sharing bro that was the catalyst i think the
16:05 following year ████ feel for you right now is that when you said i'm gonna join sport karate you know i was already doing that oh god that's right doing mortal kombat wait as a fat dude that's a fat dude oh ████ now it's even funnier placing on the top three six wow oh ████ uh wait so that but that was the catalyst for like the senior year i lost a bunch of weight started wearing american eagle because i used to only wear polo shirts in like dockers sperrys american eagles and then uh yeah that's when i was like i became like a pickup artist and i did p90x when i first came out peanut x dude tony horton is he dad we don't know so was this high school for you i think he died doing p90x he did it too much that was the real deal i'm so happy you told me that story man but also i still remember triple x fatty what a great story triple x fatty no thank you for that because
16:55 i already thought you were a ████ loser but now even harder we see it it's even now i'm just kidding nah it's ████ cool because it's like you see the full circle that's right you kind of see like the catalyst to what made gil who he is today but like even after that i lost the weight but i still had this weird confidence where it's like so fake and that's what got me into pickup artists when i actually did pua because what's simple pick up those guys oh they watched their videos and i torented their all their programs did you see when we went ████ work though did you see the video that we went we went to ucla to get a ████ pokemon girls i would just start cracking up because i i just suck at pranks and ████ and i can't i always break character so i'm like can i get your number dude because he's special the game was he's like your number just rolling no the game was so god ████ what i know
17:46 this is still odd you're in the hot seat answer the question bro tayden is tearing yeah that's how it goes that's what you like you said yeah dude you're the one that's pissed get me a seat belt so i can show you real confidence after watching like cymbal pickup and all these guys simple pickup was interesting i would sell people because this was in chicago so i still became i lost the weight but then i gained it all back because i became friendzoned again it was it was a physical change happened but that didn't change outlook with women damn so the change was i was i always tell people the story i remember being in my room uh in chicago after it was like i was like 19. or sorry 20 and i was holding a crunchwrap supreme because there was a taco bell and i said i was naked delicious and i was watching porn and i remember being like what the ████ am i doing while you're eating like a country improv all these girls keep friendzoning
18:37 me i'm eating a country after pre-i gained all my weight back back to 2 40 2 30 because i'm drinking beer all the time and i'm watching porn and i was like i kept eating the crunchwrap supreme i'm not going to throw it away for the packaging i had my moment changed and i was like i'll still eat this that sounds like a fun life though dude you're just eating then i was like all i typed from youtube was how to kiss a girl and the first thing came up wasn't simple pick up it was some other guy who straight up just talked to a girl didn't touch her doing anything and then got her number and kissed her and i was like all he did was it was just funny he was talking to her yeah and very intentional so i started going at deep dive into like most of the youtube guys that i pick up are she like and i saw the three asian guys doing i was like holy ████ these guys are doing it was being silly so i just i was writing comics so i just started doing that just girls in class and just they didn't have a creepy like approach to their thing there were some videos i found some guys i'm like they're pretty much canceled now because
19:27 like there's some like rainbow vibes that's over yeah everyone doing it now is the creepiest ████ i've ever seen it's okay if it's the best but what it taught me was just confidence of just being silly yeah because they would they would have games that's what i really liked about it is like they'll they'll be like do it with rap lyrics or pick up girls i was like you know like the show right now like impractical losers impractical jokes i don't hate them impactful jokers losers my favorite one is they would dress up like pokemon and then they would go talk to girls gonna talk to hot ass tricks too yeah that was hilarious i would literally just copy their jokes there's the dumbest ones ahead and just say it and not break eye contact and girls they would fall for it it's crazy and fast forward to today you're married right i was engaged actually i was thinking a hardcore phase back in
20:17 l.a got depressed i went back into pick up artistry where i was basically just like ranting and ramping around town just going back talking like we call machine gunning we go to a bar and talk to every single girl don't call machine gunning anymore yeah hey please don't i like it says we call it machine gun yeah like it's a community artist guys we i met her at a bar i was actually bazooka that's anthony's style bro but dude i was doing that she had a bar i did it to her i was at a wrap party for a pilot i was in and then she like denied me on everything i was i'm gonna keep talking this girl and that's stopped doing a pickup artistry there and then you're like i'm gonna stop shooting up bars dude i'm tired of doing this she's gonna get all up yeah but you're but you're simple i always wanted to meet those guys and yeah about this but you're engaged now so this is the the full story of of heartbroken to now dude
21:08 that's a straight-up movie though being fat at bandcamp crying to sean paul to getting married we're gonna skip the country supreme dude no no that's in the middle i'm just yeah yeah by the way simple darkest night right there simple pickup came out as gay all of them really that's all you know they did it dude i i think i think you're right they all did yeah they're all different right but aren't they i heard i read this i read you guys are friends i heard that you guys are like this weird legal ████ right now is that true i don't know i haven't talked to makeup artists guys they actually broke up so i don't know what they all do but i know one of them is like a creative agency that helps people shoot commercials and brand and i think some of them really got into crypto so they all kind of are started doing their own yeah uh yeah no it says that they all had a pack that they wouldn't be gay that so they're suing each other why are you pretending you're looking at articles [Music]
22:13 you
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