0:00 [Music] so let's say that you have a cobweb problem in your house yeah and let's say that um you don't really have anything to do like anything to fix that problem yeah a lighter except for a blow torch a lighter not a blowtorch well this guy only had a blowtorch oh ████ and he's like damn he burned his house down that was stupid yeah he burned his house down the cobweb was like that's just flammable you know that's just like a wick to a ████ grenade what the ████ because a lighter actually works just like that well he's a he's killing himself but not if you're blowing if not if you're burning what's behind the spiderweb he doesn't have a vacuum that works it doesn't say if he can either confirm or deny they didn't
0:51 ask him yeah bro that's how long the article is it's four sentences it's not very long he burned his own house down trying to clear cobwebs with a blowtorch how many ████ cobwebs does this guy have in his ████ house he said it was a mess later like i bet you out of one like out of one of us we do some ████ there's some guy ████ like if you think about like when don't ████ just throw it on me like that that's a very broad umbrella
1:43 [Laughter] for no reason dude you telling me you never ████ up what's a guy accident because you were curious this is what happens it's it's it's curiosity kills the man not the cat nope nope curiosity burns your house down i think we're modified we're motivated by curiosity and fun that gets us into some ████ up situations man i think you forgot the part of uh idiocracy has to also be a part of the equation but you never would read about a chick burning her ████ house down i always kill my spider you might to kill a spider it's never gonna happen dude they got to be a little creative for the house you never suck some cords into the vacuum jesus oh yeah suck some court yeah because like the lady waited the lady way would be like okay i'm gonna vacuum right let me lift up the
2:33 cord and but guys are like ████ it let me try oh wow yeah it'll come back out ████ six chords stuck in there it's a challenge yeah that was a challenge or do you vacuum like a woman is that why well it's called a robot vacuum mm-hmm did they do the work for you all their ████ i'm talking about gender roles we all do the same stuff nah i don't believe it send this video to your girlfriends if you get your dick sucked i will i don't think girls want to take that one because you know they'll be like yeah we gotta be more like man and i'm like nah you do not want to be more like men you want to burn your house this is men right here we'll ████ burn our house down because we're curious about what this flamethrower will do to a cobweb that's the true testimony if you if you say you're like hey i know i'm a man in in inside i'm like okay but do you vacuum an area rug because if you do then yeah yeah you're
3:23 you're on the team for sure i did some man ████ the other day dude like yo i was like you know i'm vacuuming and i was like yo there's a lot of dust and ████ on my yoga mat i might as well vacuum that ████ too and i just put it on high power and that ████ got stuck and now i got a ████ big ass like vacuum burn mark on my on my yoga mat yeah once you pick up the area i get i'm like why don't you shut the ████ up ████ business you know why because i don't want to lean down and pick it up who here gets rid of cobbles with fire though uh colorado man dude if i was in a garage i mean how does it take to have cowboys a while right that means that food isn't clean clean at all it depends on how much i hate the spider that's true because if i really hate it i'm gonna go ham you want to see a burn yeah yeah spiders are pretty good for the household as long as you eat your
4:14 legs i leave them alone because they eat mosquitoes yeah i leave those in general eat bugs in your house you know same with like centipedes the things that like make you feel all weird are the ones that actually eat the other bugs that piss you off centipedes like eat other bugs like that yeah i don't want centipedes these are not ████ no centipedes bro cause centipedes don't bite your ass centipedes look like they'll crawl on your ear and ████ eat your brain dude yeah that's not an alien movie you know yeah exactly i'm not ████ around with that ████ all i'm saying is they eat other bugs as well i'm just saying the conversation you started like ████ you anthony guy wants to take care of centipedes yeah what the ████ is that bro check your check your roomba and see how many centipedes are there i want to go to anthony's house and see his bug collection uh this one's name is alfred uh he's friends with jared he's like i heard you guys are having a special on terrariums he's friends with jerry mariams are
5:05 tight though yeah magnifying glasses i did used to have magnifying glasses to burn bugs yeah that's that's not that's horrible man that's ████ up oh yeah that's so bad don't do that speaking for a friend actually one of us the one of us have any of us gone hunting before no mainly i want to go man i mean fishing's hunting right i've been fishing i've been a lot of fun all my life there are different categories that's like water water hunting it's water hunting thank you water hunting dude it's way too good i grew up fishing you know why i think it's all like it's not you don't grow up um inland like when you grow up on a coast everyone just goes fishing like i don't i barely know people that went honey but then like everyone that grew up like i don't know like minnesota's that's like you're supposed to fish oh even in
5:56 dna dude that's true we went fishing me and uh gail one time and there was a japanese guy on the boat charter boat he was catching all the fish every time he would throw his ████ uh his uh line out he would catch the biggest fish did he even use bait no i want to hear yeah that's what i want to hear that's the real sometimes he would just go like this i think he just takes out his japanese earwax yeah dude japanese earwax what's the stereotype around that i don't know it's not very pungent and it makes it eat it it's like i never heard that one before but it's ████ made out of miso soup i'll accept it now it's ████ miso soup man that sounds so different it's just natto coming back that's where mata is from that's where joe gets harvested steve relate to anything in the last minute oh dude you guys always think something is an asian thing i'm like dude white people fish all the ████ times the reason
6:46 my whole life it's actually annoying how much white people say somebody's ear wax miso soup bro dude my brother has an earwax clogging problem so like the idea i won't say which one but [Laughter] so it's you know i probably shouldn't have said that that's fine that's a lot of personal ████ you just took like cylinders of earwax out of his ear and then he would like be like i can hear again and ████ that's crazy how often does he have to do that like every six months so he's probably on one of those like tick-tock videos it just keeps growing but this is our videos are wild wow like the pimple ones you probably got the wet ear wax that's why huh i don't know dude but it comes out there's two kinds depending on your genetics you have dried all the earwax you have dry or you have uh i remember one time bart was thinking he
7:37 was going deaf and then he pulled out earwax it was ████ massive that's my bro it looked like a ████ musket round oh the packed black ball like i was in we're in hawaii i think you know when you're like you're like snorkeling and then someone's water gets in and like kind of clogs it up and i think for like half the trip i'm like ████ i can't ████ hear ████ it was like really annoying me so i got one of those squeeze ball things and i was in the sink and you blast the water in and then it kind of like loosens and it comes back out and when it came out it was like like this big like at least the house you take a picture of it no it didn't it didn't smell very good either i could watch i could watch videos of that ████ i love that build up like that well i got dry ass earwax i never had any balls come out like that it's just like flaky so this guy he's he uh he's getting charges for arson all right because for his own house was the
8:27 accident it was his mom's house oh so yeah yeah this guy sucks he definitely burned his mom's house down his mom's house oh that means the mom charged his ass if this really is a guy i don't think he was even trying to burn cobwebs i think he was chasing a spider with a blowtorch it just like torched all his body it was the cobwebs mom trust me he was chasing his mom with the blow torch you know what it is it's like that movie arachnophobia doesn't he burn his whole house down this is this is my favorite part is that it's the movie where all the spiders attack this guy's house and then he sets his whole house on fire i can guess the premise but what movie is this it's called arachnophobia you never heard of that i never said hey aren't you are you an actor and like a film guy only kind of creature movie i watch is anaconda those are great that's the second movie the second one huh that's your favorite snake on the plane too great movie but i still don't believe anthony doesn't make guy mistakes you don't make guy mistakes what's what else is a guy mistake cause he's judging okay what about this what about this does let's say you're driving right and
9:18 then there's like trash cans out you know people who pull trash cans out on the street and stuff do you eat out of them do you do you guys ████ when you're when you need to leave the parking space do you do a gentle love tap to know where the trash can is or do you stop before the trash can like a female would you like him to say that ask the whole question one more time yeah yeah what the ████ just happened visual question i have to visualize one i don't even have a driveway with a trash can a lot of guy guy dude drivers they they utilize the bumper the bump how many times i hate my trash cans i have my trash cans really yeah dude i just don't do that you don't up bump there it is i don't have a driveway with trash cans my wife does the same thing too yeah different story but yeah i don't know how to relate to this man i'm trying to be a guy here or it's like you ever fly your on your helicopter landing pad kind
10:08 of miss it a little bit did you ever use your macbook as that ████ coaster or what he's like you ever aim with your 50 cal and just hit people no do you ever take her open the door and you open it as hard as you can you bump it to the cargo oh there it is and then you come out there's the car bart's like you ever get actually get into your third car but then you're like wait i was trying to get my first car that's guy ████ guy ████ bro oh wait i'm trying to get my first one yeah what the ████ this isn't my first car it's my third car ████ careful boys guys ████ boys guys guys ████ boys at the boys still yeah guys guys ████ balls with some guy ████ so this is my favorite part of this article which literally is three sentences what else is there to read a ralph's ad no check this out so he was under the house right to clear the cobwebs oh he was burning in the house in a crawl space yeah so he's like dude
10:58 this is gonna be a ████ i'm gonna ████ just torch him out right go to the wood foundation so he didn't want to ask for help or get any help right so then he then he exactly i got lighter fluid instead he lights the house on fire and then he says it and then it says he tried to put out the fire for an hour by himself before calling for help stupid ████ that's guys what do you do pull the whole garden holes out i don't know it just says he was trying to put out the fire for an hour by himself ice cubes from the fridge it doesn't work slowly he's putting him in a shirt i just love the moment of thinking like all i'm gonna do is go like that cobwebs are gone and then he goes like that and he's like oh ████ son of a ████ [Music]
12:02 you
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