0:00 [Music] attention all catholics in the room that one right a discovery you grew up catholic i grew up catholic had a catholic priest in arizona who performed thousands of voters yeah this is kind of funny what happened what happened uh he said one word incorrectly and now thousands of baptisms do not count so he was the one so they're all going to hell [Laughter] you're in the church too i like how i like how the church is throwing this guy under the bus for one word era and they're like hey all the all the
0:51 priests who are uh you know molesting little boys yeah they're all good thank you come on let's just let's just those kids are definitely touched by christ made an honest mistake you think he can just make a confession and then god forgives the sins it's not supposed to work you think god is like no this dude ████ up he is going to burn in hell got it god is actually grammar i think cadabra's are good i i don't know anything about the catholic religion how do you think he messed up skippy doo skippity dude he's this guy's bigger than scatting huh when do i remember getting baptized well do you remember what they say like during this year we were just good just freezing that was just the modern way of saying jesus
1:42 sorry my bad i was trying to slang i guess during the baptism you say like oh i baptized you in the name of the father of the son and of the holy spirit yeah he had been saying the he baptized you oh yeah it's a group effort so you can't say that's what i would argue i mean grammatically he's talking about three entities that's a jaded priest the whole thing is that it's specifically heavily not a group effort oh it's only god you're like as the bab as the baptizer you're representing the lord and because the holy spirit is a different entity it is not the community that baptizes a person rather it's supposed to be christ in him alone is it supposed to be he baptizes you i i think i i think that the i think the spirit is there the holy spirit and you should just are we really that ████ literal i think the catholics are then all the
2:32 all the priests who ████ little boys i agree thank you what does the ████ bible say about priests who ████ boys what is it should they be murdered guys they already rotated we're fine now the rotation's helped they help to help you they're just trying to cover up their ████ this stuff like this pisses me off i'm sorry like thank you tasha come on man in a religion like this have you guys been a catholic seriously for those who are i have yeah so you know how like it's very ritualistic with all the like sayings and the things you have to recite that's why my mom left my mom is a pro she went to catholic school we'll show up to like catholic weddings i grew up hindu or a funeral and like my mom will flex when we're at the ████ church doing what yeah anything don't be like it so today we're gonna be doing the him or like the opening prayer and you know like when we do like hindu chants like she's like you're very you know oh but not in church when it's like
3:22 english she'll be like [Music] and i like and i'm like what the ████ what is it that sounds like like i don't know it's like in sanskrit i don't i don't understand it so it would be the equivalent of them like doing prayers in latin why is she doing it like so crazy because she wants people to know that the indian woman in the church is about that knows more about the hymns than they do yeah she's about that life because she went to catholic school that's a weird flex bit it's a weird flash that's a good definition but i can see like my dad didn't go to catholic school so he has no idea so he's not even trying and like obviously none of us know what's going on my mom's like that too where she does she goes to like a buddhist service yeah and a lot of us is in sanskrit too and yeah so when she's seeing it they'll just like um the enunciation they'll write with chinese characters but they're trying to reproduce sanskrit sounds oh ████ dude i want to see i want to hear this but my mom being like a karaoke champion
4:12 do the best impression of it because i know what like a hindu priest sounds like so i want to know what like a buddhist there's a chant that i knew written in sanskrit in chinese yeah like she thinks she's still in a ████ kitchen yeah yeah so she'd be like people it's a very like zen you know everyone's just cheating calm and relaxed calming and she's the only one saying it in jodeci she's she's using her diaphragm yeah yeah yeah imagine an r b singer that converts to buddhism dude that's gonna be so sick he's gonna hold his ear and ████ yeah that'd be fine dude your mom and my
5:02 mom should start like a duo oh of religious chanting not in the same religion though doing different other other cultures oh it's like it's like a dueling song yeah dude they're gonna keep going back and forth they're like dueling pianos except it's just dueling hymns dueling moms so yeah so he's freaking out obviously um isn't it all about forgiveness man i don't get it this doesn't make any sense you can't nitpick this you can't nip the ghost he just needs to make a confession what they're saying is that the all of those are void like that didn't even go through because he ████ up one word so now they can't go to heaven might as well be buddhist or be hindu man can they re-baptize them free right now i guess they even have to get a refund i don't know if something like this is really happening come on can't the pope just say it's all good yeah absolve him he did with the the molesters right everyone who got raped yeah i mean yeah
5:52 i absolve you didn't happen he probably was like all the people who raped you they're good so he he resigned by the way like he's watched no longer he's one of the actually i don't know growing up but the rapist just got relocated that's ████ this is such an interesting what's wrong with the world dude this is i know this is insane it's ████ mind-blowing this is the because it's so stupid it's so stupid anything they say i'm just like okay but are you raping kids yeah that's my question are you okay that's fine set the bar real low yeah like you you hurting kids what's up that's all we have to i don't get it it's so ridiculous bro what are we doing
6:43 here did he get paid out was the church is like hey we'll just give you a million dollars for you looks like fred armstrong their garments are ████ crazy it looks like a fake baby no that's not a real baby dude have you guys seen those videos is that supposed to be is that supposed to represent christ babies he's allowed to baptize from now on yeah that's what i would say why is he holding a fake baby catholicism the baptism happens as a baby yeah have you seen those baptized when you're older and stupid it ain't like us where you gotta prove you deserve it yeah yeah cause our or when you're protestant or whatever you have to wait till a little bit older and then you have to go through like the baptism is when they they dip you in the water and then you're like refreshing and it's it's you're accepting christ no that's kind of do an opposite smooth criminal
7:35 have you seen those videos of the babies where they take the babies and they're hella rough i like how they do i like when they do it multiple times because ████ yeah dude apparently babies well i don't know can it happen at any moment or is it like a year two years is there's a specific age i feel like it's pretty early um they want to get you in as soon as possible because babies are very used to bodies of water being in the blue you were baptized as a baby yeah i think so is it what was that like is there a video is there are we getting dunked no i think it was a dunk tank like what if he's doing the moonwalk as a as a baby like a kick he's like oh but i said the word wrong it doesn't happen it doesn't count leave them in there but you dumped me the church that i went to didn't dunk because i went to a baptism once i think they yeah they just kind of like lightly dip they don't like booze it's not like it's not like uh the roast
8:26 beef juice do you want like single dip ashoo double dip full dip no they're not you don't get to choose it's definitely like a half dip it was like a gentle half dip oh man see i like the gentle half dude i like dunk churches man yeah me too yeah did they let you just like cannonball into the holy water it's up to you oh man i'm still really upset is is the priest emotionally affected by this that's what i really probably probably feels like you ████ up his job or emotionally how come he didn't sell out any other priests like what what about that guy that ████ touched his kids exactly you gotta get you you guys are amazing how how is it that not a single person right people you would assume and just every single nun the people who are trained in catholicism were like hey it's actually i
9:18 like after 20 years not one person was like yo yo dude hey just just so you know it's just eyes and it wasn't just like oh okay thanks like who was like i'm reporting you to the catholic church this is the this is the bad boy cop this is or this is the bad boy priest it was just like no we say we already yeah he's the cool guy bro he's doing play priest he's the fonzie prince what if he's like yo dreamwork makes a team work it's wee baby he puts on his sunglasses like lights a joint well this is what this is the thing in in here is canon father i don't know if it's i don't know if this is a hindu concept or more of just kind of like an indian concept we are always taught growing up it's parents teachers god in that order in that order it's not god your parents are above god all parents and teachers parents teachers wow that's pretty funny so parents are above
10:08 god yeah in the sense because because parents give you everything a parent definitely wrote this yeah we're gonna rearrange the ████ there's a famous there's a famous story you know in in in hinduism about ganesh the the elephant god and his brother who he rides a peacock okay his brother rides peacock just just those stories are ████ amazing just go with me the elephant is writing the peacock all right ganesha's parents uh are shiva and parvati okay shiva is the the the guy with the spear right many arms the angry woman oh many are okay that's you're thinking of kali who's a female oh okay she's the goddess of death nice so shiva is he he represents destruction he's ganesha's father he's usually portrayed blue yeah oh who cares a spear got like a fire and ████ yeah so he has a third eye when he opens up its destruction like it
10:58 instantaneously obliterates you lit sick so anyways i forget how the conversation goes they're like hey we're gonna have a foot race we're gonna have a race between the brothers uh you have to travel around the world three times first person to travel around the world wins three times boom the brother on the peacock goes great i'm gonna win this takes off bang ganesh goes okay brother goes around the globe comes back i did it i won and ganesha's like nah no you didn't you didn't win he's like what do you mean i went around earth three times he's like yeah but i went around my world three times and he walks around his parents three times oh that's fire and he's like no i won the race and that's why you should love your parents love your parents my mom also hug your parents everybody my mom also told me there's a saying that there's no such thing as a wrong mother written by a mother i think every mother would agree with
11:49 your mom this game feels rigged i don't like this guy though i was like man it's ████ convenient of your ass that time i left you in a boat i was right tell that to moses's mom you
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