0:00 yeah do things like sell merch or like that's a good idea like pay people off fairly so that they want to stay around longer [Music] so there's a woman in Florida who got the text of a ████ lifetime what what did they say Hey you won a million dollars no because that would seem that would seem ridiculous this one that would never happen it's more this one's like holy ████ this is actually gonna change my life so she gets a text and it says that they won um that the people on the other end won a 473 million dollar Powerball lottery jackpot in 2022. and they were donating 90 000 to 50 random individuals wow oh
0:51 yeah and then and then this person was one of the lucky 50s what does she have to do in return okay I'll give her social security number give her no that's a weird first thing to ask it's even easier or ACH they just needed to get her credit card information so that they could make sure to make the transfer to her credit card yeah yeah they're gonna put it into a credit that's how they do it because they need to cover transfer fees taxes IRS charges but just in case it doesn't go through let me have your social security number yeah she'll have a four digit credit score and ASL Bart made a pre-read this article I don't know how he knows all that you remember like a few years back somebody had won the Powerball and then a person immediately made a fake IG account of them and said they were giving away money oh that's a good hustle and it really exposed how many of your friends are ████ idiots yeah because they were all tagging you they
1:42 were like just tagged five of your friends I'll give you all money and so many people that I really thought were above that I was like damn Hawk tattoo [Laughter] it's an investment of a lifetime man he can't catch anything I don't know how Powerball looks I can't be bothered to look it up let's do more hawk accents so they bled her an amazing Australia they bled her for a couple Grand Hawk has been on the show in like two years by the way guys build a show for two years I guess by the time this comes out it's ████ ridiculous there'll be a bunch of recipes talk in the comments by the time this is up oh ████ because he's your friend fans
2:32 that's the best um it's overdue no so the lottery board issued a press release acknowledging yes there was a Powerball jackpot winner who won 473 million dollars in April but the winner isn't part of this scam um this person had thousand dollars Leech from them so they're trying to warn people um you know they're gonna claim to give you the money um and then if the Vic if the victim pays them money first obviously and then because they have to cover taxes and expenses and fees and ████ yeah and so you're like well Chef I'm gonna get like 90 G's what's a thousand dollars it's a ████ deal of a lifetime damn blows my mind that people just don't go okay let me um go to your office and I'll pay in person right or like why why do they why do they just pay that's the weirdest ████ why do they why do they think that that's part of it like I would I would be like okay cool I'll take it on the 90k when I deal with the IRS like
3:23 where do you come in yeah like what do I have to pay for it if I already won right it doesn't make any sense where these people just don't question enough they don't even see on TV it's like they see on TV the guy holding the big check is also handing the guy a little check yeah you can't see his other hand yeah you're so distracted by the big double whoa that one you don't see that one I want to go to a bank try to catching one of those oh I don't think it works really yeah because it doesn't fit in the ATM huh oh you want to cash it in the ATM it doesn't fit in the ATM hog an sucked up with the smile like that holding the big check he's like I want to cash it I'll just throw up right out of the ████ bag security guys just pick him up off of his I want to see judges trying to fill one of those things at an ATM
4:13 go to the bank doors like do you guys remember trigger happy TV trigger happy it was a Comedy Central thing where they um it was ████ hilarious when I was a kid I thought it was the funniest thing I ever saw but it was like they get um like adults in costumes but like a guy's dressed as a snail and he's like crawling across the street very slowly so that people are staying in traffic like what the ████ is this yeah I could picture something like that being on there where a guy's trying to put a big ████ check into an ATM machine yeah it's not going through I don't know why can you help me yeah I just won this Lottery I'm trying to deposit it doesn't work where's the big one yeah where's the big deposits I want the big checks can I get a really big bank teller to help me with this big check so far there's never really been a situation where somebody won a huge jackpot and was trying to give it out to everybody no ████ it was hide that's
5:03 never been a fan don't say hi we got inflation we can't you need every dollar you can get yeah didn't some catches win like two Billy yeah like one point something Bill one point something down it happened here right in like Monrovia or something or some ████ yeah Altadena and then they got the the liquor store owner got a million and nobody knows who they are though right not I don't I think they published the name but I don't know how does that work when the liquor store or the store I always heard of the store gets a bonus sells it yeah they get the piece yeah they get a bonus for that it's just a thing that happens it's to encourage more stores to carry Lotto he had a big check too John Robinson single lump sum 328 million no no I can't be is it because of after taxes or is it because multiple people won oh yeah sometimes it's like three
5:53 people will win the jackpot because they all chose 1.6 bill was the pot dang imagine getting 300 million dollars imagine being like I could have had no ████ billion I mean imagine they had gratefulness right taxes and fees I hate this but the curse is all these people either kill themselves or die early that's the that's the statistic about Lotto winners it is a it is a curse you're not prepared to handle that much money everyone around you just changes it's ████ the closest one was a guy that like I think he like already ran a business that made like two mil a year so he survived like longer but everybody in his family was all ████ up yeah yeah because that ████ makes you turn into a ████ thirsty wolf yeah right so I did the lotto to test me I want to see my character when I get a 300 million dollars yeah test me too test me dude yeah maybe a good Lotto winner
6:44 well you don't play the lotto because I think it'd be the s████████ law I winner in history what do you think you would do what do you think I would do probably buy a bunch of woo LLY I think you'd put a lot of money in changes which is nice they'll probably leave JK no you wouldn't I actually don't think he would you wouldn't I don't think he would no you wouldn't leave Jacob I would for sure leave JK no you wouldn't no you wouldn't you guys shouldn't give us some money would you really leave he made 100 Mil he told us he's gonna give us 10 grand each that's it he did say that yeah that's pretty that's pretty game probably by JK out for like 40 Grand all right how much to buy hey how much to buy you up dude like twelve dollars 12 Grand 12 Grand I think we talked about what about you Joe how much to buy you out man how
7:35 much 14. oh okay a true buyout where I probably 10 mil would be decent I put five mil on the table if I win 320 million that's nothing to you you're so cheap that's not the point that's about what you got if I do you want 320 I'd I charge you highball them see this is why people commit suicide when they win friends like this I want 300 million I'm gonna ████ send you venmo requests every day just small things so what you're saying is I should send you venmo requests now every day so if Anthony like say Anthony wins the Powerball buys out JK what does he actually get nothing everything in here you get everything in here you get your arcade you get to pay another two
8:25 three years worth at least I sent debt there's a time there's a tambourine with your name on it I'm sensing a lemon okay you don't want a matching water gun would have tampering would you run anything differently yeah that's the big question yeah that's a great question what would I run differently if I own Jake what would you change if it belonged to you would there be more would there be more like turn the business around so I could start making money that's a good idea do things like sell merch or like that's a good idea like pay people off fairly so that they want to stay around longer with your 320 mil you can buy ads from yourself and then make business you can
9:16 make money that way Ponzi yourself would would you would and Joe still want to work here if he bought us out for 10 million I'm leaving today you know how about work you you're it's stipulation you have to stay at this for 24 months five years middle of five years ago and there's a nun you buy beers five years is not compete you're not allowed to uh participate in anything else that has a bunch of friends yep well you can't fire me so hey I'm in charge I wouldn't fly I would just have more Nick traps way more Nick traps I put Nick traps everywhere I'll just walk in and that comes up sends me to the ceiling lake trout for good and I'll try to have a good attitude the whole time funny but
10:06 eventually I'd break probably bring back Bobby Lee uh Bobby hundreds and film a couple videos and then make right what we ████ up or just like and then pick hand to delete them or you would you make us read off of a script it's like so Bobby um Anthony's not a 911 denier yeah would we have to bow to your ████ narrative or would you have a teleprompter Anthony's just like Steve read the line okay Steve's just like Anthony is not a shoe cobbler I like kids do I have to read everything you got a noodle salesman the idea that I got in your head by Claudio shoe cover is ████ hilarious [Music]
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