0:00 [Music] Welcome back to a gay area episode of the careful boys. Oh, hello. Hey. Even though nobody ever cares for this context, it's always just fun to say this is our last video of the day. We are completely drained. No, we're not. Nuh-uh. Nuh-uh. Nuh-uh. You speak for yourself, baby. I could go another 10 hours, but don't have this. It's a marathon, baby. It's a marathon. This is still my favorite time of the JK. A little delirious. Delirious to him. Yeah. We've been talking for 10 hours straight. Yeah. You're busting in jail right now. Double news. Your your cup says drunk, stoned, or stupid. It's a game. It's a game. Oh, I don't care. Okay. So, Oh, you brought it up, dude. I was reading it.
0:50 I'm just reading it. You're a ████ All right. So, what do we feel are the biggest differences between modern parenting versus the previous generation, aka how we were raised. Everyone's soft now. Soft as hell. I think I I think that's I used to think that wasn't that true until I started coaching like the kids nowadays. And the kids nowadays are like they're I won't say they're more frail, but they they are a little bit more like frail soft. Like I will say this. What do you mean? How old kids? Like how old? Like little ones. Like I remember with little ones like five, but then but I we used to get some like 5-year-olds that were just game, you know, like they were just they weren't afraid of like there's some gangster kids out there for sure. But I I just feel a lot more kids maybe in our area area gay area. They're like walking and they're just like a little bit more like How long have you been teaching? I
1:41 probably been teaching since kids since like 2013. So you notice the generational difference? Like I didn't think there was going to be and I see it now. I'm like, "Oh yeah, these kids are a little feel though maybe specifically in your craft and I'm just for conversation." I don't know. For sure. Um Joe's got to get it in, dude. You got to get a pump in. Do you potentially feel like also like jiu-jitsu got like really really popular? Yeah, it's it's a lot more watered down. So now it's also like more people being like, "Oh, like maybe I can throw my kid in this and maybe they'll get a little bit more tough." Where before maybe you wouldn't even bring your kid to I think that's what it is. Like the kids like when I first started coaching, the kids that would come were already like pretty tough and were like down to like I want to ████ fight. You know, like it's like these guys walking into karate because they're like we need to find the toughest school so we can get you a fight. See which one's going to be us because it's more popular. You see kids
2:32 that like would probably do a yo and instead of doing that, they're going to come do jiu-jitsu instead. And they're like trying they're more casual with it. So they're kind of like uh I don't know. Like they seem a little more unsure about like everything. Did you ask them why are you gay? No, I didn't ask that. You are gay. Only behind their backs. Yeah. You know, um but no, but for the most part it's like maybe it's just like co kids too, you know, like the kids that like aren't as social. Like you see that a little bit more. They're like a little bit more reserved cuz before I used to be like, "Yo, stop ████ talking all the time." Cuz the kids would always just you get them together, they're always chatting. And there's still a lot of that, but I feel like it's a lot less now. They're just like kind of to themselves and not as social. Maybe even after even if they get comfortable and have more friends, they're still kind of to themselves a little bit a little bit more than than usual. If you coach them too hard in
3:22 that state, I think it's a mistake. Yeah. Yeah. And that's why it's like the little ones, you kind of have to like, you know, entertain it a little bit and not be so like a drill sergeant. I do notice the the kids kind of reflect almost stereotypically how the parents are. So like when we're like when I'm talking with the parents and then you're like, "Oh, my kid doesn't eat walnuts or whatever. Whatever." like red 40 and it's like yeah okay maybe there are studies on ████ like that but that type of parent they have like the soft kid and then when when the dad's like a ████ bluecollar guy like those kids are usually like like they're just ████ like they kind of just reflect that stereotypical if you're like that woke mom your kids are kind of soft and and then the the kids that are like um from from like bluecollar families they get ████ judo thrown are like throw me again my own family like I don't know dude I I
4:12 just don't know. I'm not a dad or nothing, but my god, like I I'll hear I'm not even going to say friend of mine. My brother will do this with his kid where he's like, "Oh, like you're crying. Cry it out. Tell me what you're feeling." And I'm like so ████ gay, dude. Don't say that out loud. Don't do this ████ Just like when I was a kid, like don't cry. You're being What are you crying about? You're being like, "Don't cry like that about that. That's You got to learn to not cry about everything. Your brother's trying to So like Yeah. What if he's trying to fix the trauma he had from like bottling it up? How do you fix that part? I don't I don't know. They should all go to therapy together, I guess. But it's just so annoying to observe because I'm just like this is such a ████ is teaching a ████ how to be a ████ So you feel like he's babying him by in my opinion. Yeah. But then I'm not there 24/7 365.
5:02 So I get it. Maybe they're like, "Dude, this is all I got left cuz I'm broken by this kid. The kid cries non-stop and this is all I got." Yeah, but but observing it, I'm just like this is just cuz I do see a ton of soft ass parents and I disagree with like the moment, but I also empathize with where they're coming from cuz we they came from like our generation where there are zero feelings, zero talk, zero debriefing of anything. So I think they're trying to like overcompensate. I think it's overcompensating though. So I know I get there's that whole gentle parenting movement ████ That's what That's what And then I think they're creating um narcissists. Yeah. Cuz sometimes I see kids where I do too. They run the show. Like if they don't want to be there, they'll tell their parent and then their parent will be like, "All right, let's go." Cuz the kid doesn't know like long-term benefits, short-term pain. The
5:55 kid is just This is uncomfortable. I don't want to be here. I don't want to do this today. And and I had the opportunity to remove myself by just b███████ and then I'm gone. Yeah. Yeah. Like a drop of a hat. That never existed for for us. We've seen adults with those traits, right? Yeah. It's not good. And by the way, I'm not talking about my one of my actual blood brothers. I'm talking about my brother-in-law who I won't name. Like we would like it makes a difference. So, cuz my brother Kenny, who has kids, is epic at it. Genuinely, he makes me want to have kids because he's so good. Like his kid, I was just at this wedding. His kid Fay is just so well behaved and it's so different than like my sister has kids and they're not very well behaved, but I love them, but they're not very well behaved. My brother Kenny raises kids to like just be well behaved. They're quiet around
6:45 adults. They're respectful and like they're cute as ████ and like you can just take in all the good. And that made me and Nikki actually say like maybe we want to have kids because Fay exists in this world as opposed to hanging out with my sister. But she's hot though, you know. That's the only reason I hang out with her. Does your brother Kenny only have one kid or does he have two? He has three. Oh ████ Okay. They're all cute as ████ and they're all sister dates with your sister. I go on brother sister dates cuz it's not weird. True. You know what's interesting is that uh I think like when when I see my friends that have kids, it's kind of all across the board. But then in the specific community that I grew up, the Filipino 7th Day Adventist community, it's pretty similar to how the parenting is almost the same. like nothing changed. Barely. It's they'll beat their kids. Yeah. It's the same like kind of like because of the basis
7:36 of like uh Christianity, you know, like that was the basis for when our parents were raising us plus Filipino ████ That works. And they they're not really doing that whole let me like fix the traumas or say they don't think about that at all. Like my whole family treats I see them treat the kids almost the same as like we were treated and I'm like how the ████ did that happen? M cuz everyone else I just see is such a everyone's freestyling or inventing their own. Yeah. They're just making up their own methods or they're like collecting methods but then it's like you see your own closest community just pass it down. Exactly. It's odd. Maybe because like when you raise families as a unit like you're kind of on the same page. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's there's more consistency than the kids. That's true. There's no trauma to fix if we don't recognize the trauma. What trauma? I was fine. Yeah. Well, I
8:27 was raised I was raised in a mixed race, you know, neighborhood and everyone's parents helped to parent the kid. Chinese homeboy. Yeah. Well, yeah. My buddy Stanley Wong. But then like my whole like there was Kyle Kim. He was a Korean kid. And then there was like my buddy Zach and he was like a white kid and there was my buddy Derek who's like a white trash kid. And like we all kind of like just everyone's parents had permission to police the kids and nobody was ever like, "Don't ever ████ talk to my kid like that, dude." And all that ████ never happened. But that was 90 like block community like but you could have lied about it by the way. You could have lied about our the kid and the parents would have the the adult side which I just actually agree with more than like this b███████ ████ really soon. Yeah. And is that the kid whose basement you pooped your pants in? The ████ Chinese kid? Yeah. Stanley Wong. I pooped his You turned out great. And
9:18 Patty his his mom was like Jesus Christ dude you ████ just ████ his pants Wranglers. You know what I mean? She And by the way, she found it immediately. Like they lived in a townhouse, like a brownstone townhouse in Fairfax, Virginia. Like three stories. She smelled that ████ You know what I mean? It's not her friend. Right. Exactly. She's like, I didn't make that. Yeah, I know. That's not That's not coming from my house. And she found it under the sink down in the basement, dude. And like I'm talking like within 10 minutes cuz I was like, I'll just go upstairs, pretend like everything's cool. We'll finish watching Power Rangers. I'll grab my shorts and I'm out of here, dude. Scot-free. And And I was like, it's perfect because I'm wearing a long I was wearing long like, you know, like pajama bottoms basically. I was like, I'll just sneak my shorts down there and we're Gucci, baby. And like she found it
10:08 immediately. And then she starts yelling at Stanley like like, "What the hell? You don't ████ your pants down here." And then I couldn't let him go down. So I was like, "Dad, that's my ████ my pants." Pretty big time. You know, pretty big time ████ Big time. Thought I was farting and I just shill over my pants. What did Patty say to you, dude? Patty was like shocked that I did it cuz she was wanted to blame Stanley so badly. She's like, "Steve couldn't." Stanley won. Yes. No, she wanted to blame Stanley so bad that that she was almost disappointed to find out that that I She was right. She was ready to go, dude. And I I couldn't let him go down for for my crime. So, I was like, "Nah, dude. I ████ my pants pretty bad." That's big of you at that age. Yeah, thank you. You can't let him go down for a bad one. I would have said ████ I'll be like, "Yeah, Stanley, that's ████ up you,
10:58 bro." Hey, Stanley, let off the Doritos, huh? Hey, maybe let's be dead next time, brother. Jesus, this guy. What's up with this guy? Love to ████ himself. Weird. Do you know this about your son? I got to go home. Power Rangers is at home, too. I'll catch you the second half at home. Just nuts. Um my my dad actually only has one gripe with the way my sister raises her kids and I don't think he says anything to her, but he's definitely mentioned it to me like five times. Um and it's that my sister is very like schedule oriented with the way her kids are. It's like nap time. Like everybody showers at this time, dinners at this time, like go to sleep at this time. like you have to take your nap if you're at this age, blah blah blah. And it's like I see how
11:48 it's useful for them. Um, and I can see how like people in today's generation have talked about like, well, it's better if we have these type of schedules, blah blah blah. My dad's always just like I just that's the only thing I don't agree. Uh, when it's you and Alina when you grow up, we go somewhere, you want to stay up, we stay up, you go to sleep. Sometimes I don't want you to play games too late, but you still play, so whatever. And I'm like, you know what? I do think we turned out okay. That's that's real tough. That's a that's a tough argument. And it is complicated cuz, you know, sometimes when the family wants to go do something, it's like, I got, but I got the kids and they have to go to sleep at this time, so I can't come out until this time. And it's like, you're okay. Is that unreasonable? No, that's the thing. It's like, you know, uh, in bed by by 6:37, 7ish. Uh-huh. In
12:38 bed by 6:30. That's so early. Holy ████ That is unreasonable. They're 7 5 2 and a half years old or whatever. That's unreasonable. What the ████ But that's the thing which again I'm not I'm not the parent. So I'm to me my my reaction is like that's her kids. Yeah. I mean Yeah. Yeah. Those are her kids. So to me I'm like that's reasonable that you could do whatever the ████ you want with your kids. Don't police me if I have kids. Which is why my dad's respectful like that too. He's not saying it to her. But he's just like, I just think that if we if we want to go out and something special happens, we go. Yeah. I'm like, that makes sense to me. I feel like I might do that. Yeah. I mean, kids do thrive off stability. And like I think the studies show they you get less anxiety later on in life if you have a consistent like schedule for kids, which that's seems like a reasonable thing to
13:28 invest in also when you're younger. No doubt. But I mean that's I see that to be a different thing. And you know, when you have a conversation of like like what if in the long run they thrive off of stability and don't get anxiety as much, but then at the same time when schedules don't work out for them in the future, will they get more? Who knows? Also, dude, people just leave out ████ basic ass DNA genetic ████ Like, I came from the same family as all my introverted ass ████ brothers and sisters, brothers and sister. And all of them are introverted as ████ I'm the only extrovert in my whole family. Well, exactly. It's just DNA ████ I I was raised in the same environment. And by the way, I hate noise. I hate as you if you can't tell, I don't have kids cuz of noise. But it I think it's You didn't have noise. I think it's cuz I didn't I only was raised with noise. And I find
14:19 noise very annoying because of it. Like actually my when I think back to my growing up years, I get pissed when I think about how much noise was in my house. A kid being mad about that. Is it cuz you had a big family? Yeah, man. And it's like three siblings, so everyone's doing everything at all hours. And my parents just don't ever stop watching TV. So there's like three TVs on in the house all night long, no matter the ████ what. And so growing up, it was just like that. I just don't like noise at all. And so getting with Nikki is great because she doesn't want a TV in the bedroom. And I'm like, "Oh my god, this is fantastic." Yeah. So like at at night in my neighborhood, especially like where I live now in Vegas, it's quiet as a mouse, dude. It's dead silent. I couldn't have any I couldn't wish for anything more than that. It's so much better in LA because of that. And so like yeah, I just don't want to be around noisy ████ And I don't think
15:10 that my you know my siblings really have that same problem. Are their houses still pretty noisy? Yeah. ████ yeah. Noisiest place ever. Noisiest place ever. Dude, it's a good bargain. It's like a bowling alley with like a bunch of drunk people. It's not a priority for your siblings to keep the house quiet and ████ no. It is exactly like up when I'm over there and it like actually comfort. Yeah, I think it does, but I'm just different. And it's weird cuz they're they're introverts and I'm an extrovert, but I don't want to be around I don't want to be around BL. I thought you could say black people. No. Well, oh, another 20-minute video. Well, we could we could let's save it. Let's do Let's do too long on the Vlad, dude. Exactly. I was like, this is it. Glather really bothers me where it's like, "Well, this is the wrong profession for you,
16:00 brother." No, but it's incessant noise for no reason. I don't like that ████ The yappy yappy. It's like junk noise. Exactly. Like intentional conversation or whatever or else I'm out of there. Yeah. It's not like when you're having a dinner party. I like some like it it just feels like there's life going on. Like you hear the clicketity clacky of a dog's paw and then you hear like a baby ████ crying in the background and whatever. You like sleeping to that? I think because I had a lot of that too, but I I responded differently to it. Yeah. Cuz when my parents first came here, it was um my uncle and my aunt also living with their three kids and then us. So it's me and my brother. So then that was like hell of people. And we always had visitors and people coming by and then they ran a a music school in the living room. So there were always
16:50 people to come like when when siblings came and took lessons like I get to play with all the different like all all the brothers and sisters while they wait for their turn to go learn piano. Yeah. So that was normal to me. And then so being in an empty ass house and hella quiet, that s███'s weird. But what I don't like is city noise. Oh yeah. Cuz city noise is like I'm walking here. Yeah. And you're like I can't ████ sleep. What the ████ all day. Yeah. Yeah. I like sleeping to no life. It's great. No, it's great. It is really nice. Life changing, man. Honestly, dead silent. But I heard from hella like New Yorkers though that when they go to the country, it's too quiet and they're like, "Where's that ████ white noise?" They think there's like an axe murderer. Yeah. Even when we move to like the country of San Diego in Escandido, I
17:42 could hear like coyotes ripping apart rabbits all night. I'm like, there's just no getting away from ████ noise. Cuz if I go downstairs, I'm just gonna hear I'm gonna hear like ████ old episodes of Matlock like at 80 ████ volume or Fox News in the other room or my brother's playing ████ Mass Effect, you know what I mean? And I'm just like, I just got to get out of someone on the phone talking loud. Yeah. Yeah. One of my favorite memories though is like when my parents are at dinner parties or whatever and I'm just knocked the ████ out on a restaurant booth. Oh yeah. Yeah. And then you your ████ parents just pick you up, go to sleep in the car, and then they pick you up, put you in bed, and you're just like, "Oh, ████ yeah." The only thing I I think I would change like when I'm raising a kid is that my parents didn't do I would let my kid be a kid just a little bit longer than my parents let me be a kid. When
18:32 did they tell you Santa wasn't real? They from the from the jump. I don't believe it. Jesus is real. I think like they my dad had always just talked to me like a normal dude like a like I wasn't a child. Hey bro. And like from the I don't remember ever being like babyed which I think is cool but like I remember wanting to be a silly kid and like I would get busted for it and I'm like dude aren't I young enough to still be like that? Like I was like thinking that's early. Like I think I would cuz I think my dad thought I would turn out ████ if he treated me like that. He didn't want me to become like some kind of like manchild. That was ████ weird. But I was I think like I would let my kid be a little goofball a just a little longer than me. Maybe they're just annoyed of your pranksterness. Who Who keeps putting the papa gun in my shoe? Classic Ryan prank. Classic.
19:25 Picture you putting it in the soul. So when he puts his It sucks when you're put his foot in. I I just was always talked to like a like a adult. Like I was like this is ████ weird. You're mature now. I would make like stupid silly jokes. My dad would go, "What? That has no meaning." I'm like, "Yeah, it does." How old were you? As long as I can remember being four or five. I would just go and my dad go that there's no logic. There's no sense in that. What are you doing? He just take He just took it so seriously. He's like, "What?" But he's not a serious guy. He's a funny guy. But he wouldn't play with me. He would It was just too funny. He would joke to his his like family and the rest of the adults, but then when I jump in, I'm like He's like, "That does what what's the meaning? What's the punch line?" Yeah. Yeah. He goes, "You got to be a through line. You got to have a type five. You didn't even set it up." No set up. No set. No set up. Stare at me like dead blank. Stare at me like this. What is
20:16 this? Yeah. One of my favorite things is ████ with Ta. That's like my favorite. Like we'll watch like a UFC fight. Like Jean Silver like he's like a fighter. Oh, I went to high school with him and he'll like tell me the truth. He doesn't believe in anything, man. You ████ with him too much. He's so skeptical. Which is awesome. I try to ████ with him and it's like, "Oh, he can't. He doesn't believe anything. He's too good." That's my nephew. My nephew is very smart guy. Very smart. Uh probably defo autistic, right? Oh, I'll be like, "Hey, Cody." I'll be like, "Hey, uh, the moon, you know, the moon's made out of cheese." He's like, "No, it's not. No, it's not. Moon's made out of minerals and moon's made out of rocks." And I'm like, "No, it's not. It's made out of Swiss cheese. Read a book." And then he's like, "What? No way." And he runs to his dad. He's like, "Who?" And his dad is also autistic and
21:06 and his dad's like, "Who told you that? Who told you that?" And then Curry's like, "Uncle Steve, Uncle Steve." And then he's like, "No, Uncle Steve." So funny. It wasn't Uncle Steve. Immediately like outraged. Uncle Steve really believes that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Uncle Steve thinks it's man. What do you think about black people? Well, I have to do a whole ████ 20-minute video. Yeah. Save it. Save it. Save it. I can't be doing that ████ Ask Chad GBT. You can't do this ████ with 30 seconds.
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