0:00 [Music] Welcome to an episode of Careful Boys. We're going to get really sensitive about our um relationships today. What is something that if your wife asked you to do this besides pulling the plug? You would say no. We pull the plug on her relationship or me. Yeah. They're all on the table. Noing. Uh cuz we already talked about that. It's like if she was like, "Oh, pull the plug on me when I'm in a coma." Most of us were like, "I can't." Oh, there besides that other stuff. It's like, "We get it. You You're such a good good dude. Now what?" Yeah. What's some stuff that like if she if Gio had asked you like, "Hey, could you do this for me?" You would be like, "I can't What would you What would you deny
0:51 her?" Like her mom one last time. One last ride. Give it to her. So, he's already done it. I could do that. I can do that. Oh ████ All right. Cuz she's lonely. What if she said, "Um, I've been waiting. Thought about it. I thought about it right now." And I I made a decision. Hey, I really think we should move back to LA to be close to the rest of the family for at least a few years. Let's do it. Wow. Like, I don't know. I feel like I'm You're traitor. Maybe because I'm a a robot. Robart. I have I think cuz I'm because I'm Robart. New merch. like um if the zeros and ones make sense, I don't have too much emotions clouding like my how I process things, you know? What if she's like what if she's like, "Hey, now that you ████ my mom, I need you to my mom again." What? There's only one time you
1:42 said that. This needs to be a regular thing. What if she said, "What if Gio goes, I think we should let your mom move in with us?" Oh, super down. Really? Yeah. Really? Because as much as I hate cilantro, she hates cilantro even more. What do you mean? Oh, your mom hates cilantro bad. You call your mom cilantro? Wait, what? It's worse than that. It's just a euphemism. Yeah, don't take it on a cilantro. Like my mom gets on my nerves like crazy, right? And she triggers the ████ out of me. Um, but that's like a like a one-way like stream with Gio. Um, my mom also does that to her. Not to that extent, but she also has to witness me and hers dynamic. Uhhuh. So
2:32 she has to witness like waking up in the morning and then seeing like me and my mom in the kitchen like you're a ████ Like you're ████ So it's it's I believe that felt real like Gio would have Gio would have a ████ Like Gio would have more to deal with, you know? And then at the end of the day, at the end of the day, I feel like it's in our ████ like Asian bones. Like no matter how much we hate our ████ parents, even if we want them to get run over by a bulldozer, like you'll still take them in. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You know, you know, Hannah actually told me to do that. To get run over by to run my mom with a bulldozer. No, I'm just kidding. No, she she she she said, "Uh, move in with you. We should we should ask her to move cuz cuz uh my
3:23 stepdad just passed away. That's dope of Yeah, that's really sweet of her. Why would you want to do that? Like I love my mom. Joe's like you met her and then she goes, "Yeah, she's super sweet." Yeah, but like I mean like I think I think you might not have an issue with her. She's actually not bad. Like she's not that annoying. But I'm like but then when you're the son like you just have it's just annoying cuz you just grew up with that, right? Mom. Yeah. And then I was like why why would you want that? Like she's so old. We'll be taking care of a baby and her she ain't going to be helping with the kid. You don't think she would? She's so old. Like we're going to end up ████ taking care of that lady, taking care of the baby. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's true. And then she was like, "It ain't about that." So women have a different perspective. What is it about? She goes, "Kids need to see that you take care of
4:14 family." And even if there's uncomfortable situations or conflict, you need to show them how to work that ████ out. And then when you grow up with that, then they have an example of like what family should do for each other. You don't ████ throw people or whatever. Moving a cousin in or something. Yeah. Show them certain movies. I know. But she's like, "Don't you want second? Don't don't you want to move in with your kids when when you when you're old and s███?" And I'm like, "Yeah, but I'm not gonna be annoying like my mom, I think." I don't know. That's really wise of Hannah. That's very wise of her. That's sick. That's really cool, actually. But ████ think differently. ████ think different. She told me that and like we were on a date or something. I'd be like, "Wow, you're such a good person." And I never talked to her again. Oh, you're a garbage person. Okay. It's too late now. You know, she told me way later. Yeah. Way later. What if Gio was like, "I want to open Barbell Brigade Summerland."
5:05 ████ I would say ████ And I'll be like, "Let's do it." Oh, yo. I mean, her happiness is very important to me. Wow. But I would be like, "Motherfucker, are you ████ serious?" I'm like, I'll be like, "I'm going to I'm just made muscle mouth. I might have to bang like five hookers tonight and then we'll go do it." Just to get all that You could just say yes to make her have it. You wouldn't even be like, "Let's talk about it." Well, because it's also a productive thing still. You know what I mean? It's like it's like it's her asking me like it I'm I'm taking it as like, "Hey, tomorrow let's climb this really big mountain, but there's going to be a million dollars at the top." What about this? She's like, "Hey, I would really like to get into meth with you." Yeah. Oh ████ Like just light meth. So you think that meth is like for us? Just like a afternoon me sesh when Ta goes down a little bit. Can we do it like like try it once and then kind of like talk about it a little bit more? Not
5:55 full force for a whole year. No, I I'm really committed to this. I'm really committed to this method. I want to ████ go with the tunnel people in Vegas and go get smoked out. Damn. I'm about to say no to that one. Whoa. Put your foot down. Suddenly your happiness doesn't mean ████ Guess who doesn't ride fart. When it's convenient for him, when there's a million dollars at the top of the mountain, then he'll get up for his wife. My ass. I was like, "That's kind of ████ up, dude." If Tiff was like, "Can you Yeah, put him on with the ████ M. Let's start easy. Let's start easy. Starting easy." What if Tiff was like, "I want you to join Gracie Bar instead of Lion Hart from now on. You have to lo, you have to move." I'll be like, "No, no. Why?" Like, why? Such a quick note.
6:45 Let's start easy. Over here. I was like, "Over here." I'll be like, this is what I tell her all the time. I'm like, "You think I just trained just for fun? Like I get, you know, like I ████ get paid to train. Like if that's the reason why I go over there, Gracie like that's I'm not good enough, babe. I'm just not good enough. I just fall on my knees. That's what I do. Okay. What if she's like, "No more watermelon in the fridge." Oh, it's weird and it gay. It's gay. It's very Then what I would do is I would buy my own mini fridge and I'd put it in my office. Damn. That' be my watermelon fridge. No more fanny packs. All right. Also, that solution just made your life better. Yeah, that's a 10x. Oh, no. I have to get a mini fridge. Sounds like a terrible thing. What if What if she's like, "You spend too much time working out. Um, why don't we just spend this whole year eating whatever we want, but
7:36 no fitness?" I'd say no. I would say absolutely. You're going to be fat. So far, Nick's just saying no left. I'm saying absolutely. It's not a ride or die, dude. Me and Tiff, we have disagreements a lot. Like not disagreements, but like but hard nose for things. Well, what if she's like, "I'm going to give you a ████ every day this year." I'm like, "Absolutely not, babe." What if What do you think I am? I can't handle this. My schedule's very stressful. I will stop doing everything. She said no to you about stuff recently or what's the last thing she was like, "No, Nick. No, his outfit." How much she actually doesn't care? Honestly, she the fact sometimes I ask her, I'm like, "Can you help me dress better?" She's like, "I kind of like that you don't really give a ████ about how you dress." That's just And I was like, damn, dude. What a messed up thing to say. She's so tight because she needed like dressing kind of fly. No, she bro, she's a fashionista. Like she loves fashion. Like that's like that's her that's her fun passion. I feel like
8:27 I always tell her this. I was like, if you wanted to open up your own vintage store, like you have such a good eye, like you would be successful in that. Like I think she would murder it. But it's like, but in order to look this good, you need to look. And I tell her all the time, I'm like I'm like, look, I am a trainer. I wear ████ gym clothes all day. I'm not the ████ You dress for scent. Yeah, I don't dress for that. What happened to your rainbow Crocs? You retired them. The ones with bugs on it now this time. Check these out. Every time out. Every time Nikki tells me to dress better, I just go, "Hugo, boss, dress Nazis." That's good. I learned that yesterday. What if Tip is like, "I don't like this casuals thing. I don't want you on there no more." Yeah, that's a tough one. That'd be a tough one. But I'll be like, "Babe, like it's going to ████ pays bills, dude." Like it's it's a it's just a gay podcast. It's just a gay babe. It's you I'm I'm a prominent figure in this gay
9:18 community. Okay. So you you wouldn't say no to her. You'd be like No, you would say no to her. No, I would say no to her. I'd be like ████ I didn't hear nothing but no. Okay, great. So all knows. All nose. What if she's like I really want to see the potential of your fight career. Ooh. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Cuz here's the thing is Tip would never say any of that. Yeah. She every time every time we watch a UFC feels to be like, "Hey, ████ my mom twice." Yeah. Yeah. Nick. That's true. Hey, you know what? You're right. I I didn't think of it that way. What if Tiff goes, "I want you on Power Slap." I would love to see Nick on Power. You want to see me get knocked out again, Steve? I want to see you go holding a ████ pool noodle. We could bet against them. And she's like, I want I don't want you in a in a weight class. I just want you all across. I want you in the open. Damn, her powers. I'm like, "Well, babe, if you have if you have faith, if you
10:08 have blind faith in me, blind faith in you. I think I could do this." And I'm just lining up ████ with my You can't even reach the guy. Can you get a little closer? Can you lean in? You got to use one of those ████ pool stick extenders. I got a stepping stool and I can slap him. No. Um, no. I I probably wouldn't do that, but like every time we watch a UFC, Tiff goes, "I'm so happy you don't fight at all anymore." She says that all the time. And I'm like, "All right, you don't have to say it every time." All right. What if she's like, "You get your ████ ass kicked. Yeah. Yeah. You didn't get beat. Time to see if you lay down on the mat. First, what up, guys? Come join our Patreon cuz there's hundreds of videos dating back to 2019. Support the channel's growth and new ideas and tap into the closer community by joining our Discord. Come chat with me inside and then you can say funny things to me and get the opportunity to suggest new video ideas.
10:58 Come join our Patreon. Thank you. link is in the description box below. I'm going to try to find a Yes. What if What if Tiff is like, "I would like you to grow your hair out really long." I might do. Yeah, I will do that cuz partly uh like Joe Joe long when he had his hair like down here and ████ just to test it out because that's long. She The reason why my hair is short is because she's like, "I like when your hair short and I'm like I like when my hair shorts too." So perfect. But like if she was like me too. If she was like, "Hey, grow your hair out." I'll be like, "I'm down to try it out." Okay, I'll try it out. And then to cut it once it gets like to the bob level and I'm like, I can't do that. Okay, what if she's like, I want you to get braces. Oh ████ I'm like, babe, what about invisal line? She says, no, I want the the colored bracket knowing that it's going to be like a hassle for mouth guards and all that stuff. And I just talk like this all the time. Hey guys.
11:51 Yeah, I I love talking about fights in MMA. She's like, I just want you to get them. What if Nick had anime hair, dude? And I just do this with my teeth. Oh, like Yeah. like like your old hair, dude. He looks like a Japanese host bar boy. Hey, you're trying not to touch the floor when you roll. Oh ████ Sorry, my hair. Hey guys, I can't really do too much today. And you have a retainer. So you you talk like that. Hey guys, I just want to teach some juice to today. We're going to be learning the rolling mouth, you know, and bracing. Every time I do this with my teeth, I go, "Holy ████ dude. Have rubber bands." Holy ████ Hell yeah. That image is terrifying. Would if Nikki asked you to stop being krypto? Oh, she wouldn't. This is That's what It's like you. It's like she just There's things that she really likes about me and she likes that I like a lot. Let's not make it real. Just real question. Come on, dude. I wouldn't I wouldn't. Yeah. Wow. Okay. But but like
12:43 I said, she would never do that. What if she was like, "Don't have sex with me tonight. Don't have sex with me." I'd probably force myself on her. Yeah. Easy one. Best answer ever. You have to. I like the probably before that. I want you to shoot one video on JK News shirtless. What the ████ Oh, yeah. I can do that. What if Sure. What if she's like, I want to have just one kid. At least just one kid. I would do it. Damn. If it was a definite thing, then yeah, sure. I'll do it. Oh, deal with it. What if she's like, I don't want cats anymore. Oh, I would ████ do it in a heartbeat. I would do that yesterday. I want my yellow cat to die so bad. Oh my god. He just pees on so much stuff. Bro,
13:36 cat pee is awful, though. It's so bad. What does he pee on? Pe on everything, dude. He pees on my wife's head. He pees on my wife's head. Franklin. Not Franklin. Joe, the yellow one. It's all or nothing. Oh, I can't get rid of Franklin. That's why we're I we My house smells like a ████ cat box. It is what it is. These are pets, baby. That's what if Hannah wants to open a second June be also in Hawaii. Oh, ████ Like right now? Yeah, right on the other side of the island or something. Northshore. Northshore Ji. We'll make it work. Whoa. On big island where there's no foot traffic or die though. Yeah, we'll make it work for the lava. We'll make it work because um I'm assuming that it's very successful, which is why we're doing another one. That's true. You're not doing another one cuz it's going Yeah. It's like, let me let me open up a crappy location. What if she's like, I love the way it
14:26 went last year. I want to repeat that. Let's do it again, dude. That business model is sick. What uh what did you like about it? How the tourism didn't show up because of the ████ shame from the buyers? She's like, I love when David tells us what to do every day. She's like, I want us to move to Liverpool. Oh, I think I probably want to move to Liverpool more than she does. Going from Hawaii to Liverpool is wild, though. Yeah, I know. Gray skies every day. Gray skies will make you I like variety. That's what that's that's my problem is I'll be at ████ maybe Vegas and I'll be like, "All right, guys. I'm going to the Arctic, you know, cuz the the the the opposite is kind of nice to me." I'll do that right when we open up Vegas. Go to the Arctic. Yeah. Okay. Okay. What if she's like, "Hey, I
15:16 think we should start going back to 7th Adventist Church and rekindle your old like You know what's funny is cuz there's like slight truths to all of these extreme things that you said." Yeah. Like we've actually considered Liverpool. I told her I was like, "What if we just live next to your family?" She goes, "No, I grew up there." And I was like, "That's your impression of her." I grew up there. You don't want to be there. Sounds like a limey name. It's a ████ hoe. Sounds good. It's a ████ ho. you won't like it. You don't have you don't have friends. And I was like, I have I I can make a ████ ton of friends. And Liverpool people are ████ friendly, dude. Like they'll talk to you as if they've known you for like 10 years. The Scouses? Yeah. They'll be like, if you're lost, like they'll ████ show you where to go. They won't even scan you ever. Like they're just Yeah. Super talkative. You think you could stay there for like 5 years? Ah, I
16:07 don't know about 5 years because uh but I travel a lot. You know, I'll probably end up saying that I live there and then I'll show up here every 3 months and then I'll stay here for like a month. Who knows? But um what was the other question? To go back to SDA church. Go back to Oh, yeah. So, funny thing is she was like last year she's like, I think we should choose a religion. And I'm like, all right. And then she went through this whole thing of like, I think I'm Jewish. And I'm like, really? And then she goes, nah, I think I'm going to be Orthodox uh Christian. And then she goes, no, I think I'm Catholic now. So she's she's kind of like rouletteing this. She likes change a lot too. She's just kind of choosing her thing, you know. Go to different churches. I know. And she she went as far to find a synagogue in Hawaii. And she goes, "I think we're going to like this one." And I'm like,
16:57 "Why there's Jewish people in Hawaii?" But she goes, "It has It's a It's a more modern one. It has like a female rabbi." And I'm like, "What the ████ Rabbi, you could do that? I didn't even know that was doable. Shouldn't be. Yeah. Should be illegal. I was like, I don't think I'm allowed. Like, I'm not I'm not one of them, you know? Like, don't you have to be like actually like European Jewish or whatever? You got to be circumcised. So, you're out. That's another one, too. You have to go back in then. You have to go with the knife. You can't afford to lose anymore either. And then she goes, "Right now, I like Catholics and Jewish." Would you be down to get circumcised right now? Hell no, dude. I would do it. Would you be down? I would do it if we get 200 more 200,000 more subscribers on Instagram. 400,000. 400,000. If she asked you to ████ room, dude, I guess. Really? I
17:47 don't want to. But you would do it for her if she's like if she's like, "Can you just do it?" Dude, getting circumcised as an adult ████ sucks. You did it, right? Half I have half of mine left, dude. But we need 200,000 more on the inside. ████ that. ████ sucks. It's not worth it. I would say no. I don't want to die. Not even for 200,000 more. ████ that. What value is that? You can't have your foreskin. I know. What if What if Nina said no more of this Kinja ████ She said no more Kinja ████ Mike dead. Or she goes, that's another one. Or she goes Kraas cut it in half. That's what she said. Like half gone. Like Thanos that ████ Wait, is like Kra's like it can no longer exist or I'm just not a part of it? No. Yeah, she
18:37 doesn't. Well, if you're not a part of it, then it's going to not exist. No. No. No. Come on. Look at his face. No, that's not true. Look how serious he is. You want to start a new Look at his eyes. Look at his eyes. Look at that smile on his face, dude. He's like, "No, that could never happen." Yeah. He's like, "Stop. Don't say that. No, don't say that to me. I could only fight without me. Please stop behave comfortable. [Laughter] Baby, who are you? Who is this? Why are you being like this? Who are you? Bad PR. Don't do it. You know this is going to You know this is going to look bad on me. The bud. I could only dream though. All right, you got up easy. Ryan, you're nasty. You're terrible. You're terrible. You get zero.
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